Should I worry about my Grindr encounter?

[Bttml00king]

I usually bottom but when it comes to topping, I prefer younger guys. I am very careful and discreet when meeting guys online but what had happened really hit my nerves. 

A few days ago, a 19 yo guy hit me up on Grinder and sent me pictures of his face and shirtless upper body. He asked for my face pics so I unlocked my album with face pics. Then, he sent me his nude pics and I returned mine as well. The exchange went typical with "into" and "where to meet." He said he was a bottom and liked to be submissive. He asked if I was into role play and I replied "not really." He asked if I was married with kids. I replied "yes" and he said that was very hot. 

We both could travel and agreed to meet for carplay. I asked if he knew a safe spot for carplay. He said he did and would be free in a few hours. I was not going to waste my time and told him to hit me up when he was free and ready to meet. He continued to messege me. He first told me to pick him up and I said no. Then, he said he could come pick me up which I declined. He told me that he was a virgin and asked if that turned me on. I replied yes. He asked me why and my answer was maybe a tighter ass. Then he tried to call me via the app. I didn't answer and told him that I don't do calls. He then sent a voice message saying how tight his hole was and tops could not get their cocks in. 

He asked if my kids knew that I was having sex with guys. I told him that I would not get into personal details. This is when he started sending me a string of offensive and harassing messages. He first asked how my kids would feel that I am fucking boys not much older than him. Then, he claimed he was 15 and I had nudes from a minor on my phone. He called me disgusting and said that he had saved my face and cock pics. 

He asked what my kids would do if I gets arrested for being a pedophile and if I had sex my children too....etc. What will I do if my wife finds out? At this point, it was too much to bear. I reported and blocked him. 

Should I be concerned? This whole thing really made me feel uneasy. As much as I like hooking up, there is no way that I would break the laws to do anything with minors. Thanks for reading. 

[Everopen]

Report the profile to Grindr 

[drew4fun]

I'd suggest not ever supplying your face pic in the future, too many sexstortionists on-line these days.  

[Bottom Jim]

Report to Grindr I he continues report to police Make sure you saved he said was 19 now 15

[Bottom Jim]

I also never ever send my face pic

[Bttml00king]

33 minutes ago, drew4fun said:

I'd suggest not ever supplying your face pic in the future, too many sexstortionists on-line these days.  

Good suggestion and I have learned my lesson. Thanks. That is what I am going to do from now on. 

31 minutes ago, Bottom Jim said:

I also never ever send my face pic

Before Grindr introduced albums, I had never sent my face pics. With "Albums," one could not screenshot photos. However, that doesn't really prevent those who want to take photos of the albums using other means. 

I did report him to Grindr before blocking. His profile clearly stated 19 and I had a screenshot. If he was indeed 15, he should not have signed up for Grindr. 

[highcountrybb]

I wouldn’t worry about it. Sounds like he was gonna eventually try to extort you for $$$ or just wanted to make you paranoid. As a rule, I never communicate with anyone 21 and under, nor do I talk to faceless, empty profiles, and I never send nudes lol. Yes, that certainly limits my pool somewhat significantly, but you can’t trust people these days. 

[pozsewerpig]

To sign up with Grindr, you need to verify that you are 18+, not that it would keep you out of legal trouble if he truly was underage. But that coupled with your screenshot of his profile with claims of being 19 certainly don't help his cause. It seems more likely that this is an attempt at a shakedown for $$$ or a "means to mess with some gays" by someone with nothing better to do. It's stories like yours that only confirm my perhaps not so unconscious preference for men 30 or older.

[ellentonboy]

I would not worry.  If that individual stated he was of legal age, and if fact was not, he is the one in trouble.  A friend of mine went through this kind of extortion in California and when he told him he had screen shots of every conversation they had the kid backed down.  I don't blame Ginder ,they can only do so much, and I certainly wouldn't cast the blame on you because he stated he was of legal age.  

These punks think because a guy is over 30 or 40 or whatever is going to hand over money for fear of being turned into law enforcement need a wake up call.  Call their bluff, ask them what their parents would think, their classmates, the police who file the report.  They are in fact filing a false police report if they claim they told you they were underage when a screen shot or something on your phone proves otherwise.

They will back down quickly. 

[Bttml00king]

2 hours ago, highcountrybb said:

I wouldn’t worry about it. Sounds like he was gonna eventually try to extort you for $$$ or just wanted to make you paranoid. As a rule, I never communicate with anyone 21 and under, nor do I talk to faceless, empty profiles, and I never send nudes lol. Yes, that certainly limits my pool somewhat significantly, but you can’t trust people these days. 

I actually haven't thought about him trying to extort for $$$. That makes sense. You are right about not trusting people and certainly very strict with your Grindr usage. It definitely limits the pool. It did when I had never sent my face pics. The age limit is a good approach. Those with ill intent could still claim to be 21 but in fact under age. 

1 hour ago, BugchaserSewer said:

To sign up with Grindr, you need to verify that you are 18+, not that it would keep you out of legal trouble if he truly was underage. But that coupled with your screenshot of his profile with claims of being 19 certainly don't help his cause. It seems more likely that this is an attempt at a shakedown for $$$ or a "means to mess with some gays" by someone with nothing better to do. It's stories like yours that only confirm my perhaps not so unconscious preference for men 30 or older.

The age verification thing had me off my guard and thought that I could not possibly talk to any minor. You are right though that would not keep me out of legal trouble. That is what I am worried about if in fact he is a minor and lied about his age to sign up. 30 and older seems to be safer. It would be too much of an age gap to fake. 

1 hour ago, ellentonboy said:

I would not worry.  If that individual stated he was of legal age, and if fact was not, he is the one in trouble.  A friend of mine went through this kind of extortion in California and when he told him he had screen shots of every conversation they had the kid backed down.  I don't blame Ginder ,they can only do so much, and I certainly wouldn't cast the blame on you because he stated he was of legal age.  

These punks think because a guy is over 30 or 40 or whatever is going to hand over money for fear of being turned into law enforcement need a wake up call.  Call their bluff, ask them what their parents would think, their classmates, the police who file the report.  They are in fact filing a false police report if they claim they told you they were underage when a screen shot or something on your phone proves otherwise.

They will back down quickly. 

I am glad to hear and thanks for sharing your friend's story. I didn't respond to his string of harrasing messages and even wasn't sure what to respond. I was in shock and only knew to take screenshots before reporting him to Grindr and block him.

Thank you for these posts. They certainly made me feel better. I feel sad than angry that I and many others have to deal with this kind of craps. 

[HoneyBuns1980]

If a face pic exchange is a deal-breaker, just move on. I think it’s far more risky than anonymous hookups. You can never really be too sure about someone you barely or don’t know having your personal information. But, if an anon hookup turns into something meaningful (however you want to define that), it shouldn’t be a problem to trade. 
 

[Bttml00king]

1 hour ago, HoneyBuns1980 said:

If a face pic exchange is a deal-breaker, just move on. I think it’s far more risky than anonymous hookups. You can never really be too sure about someone you barely or don’t know having your personal information. But, if an anon hookup turns into something meaningful (however you want to define that), it shouldn’t be a problem to trade. 
 

You are right and that is a good tip. Thanks!! 

[highcountrybb]

Grindr has gone way downhill over the past few years. Bots, pic hunters, trolls, fetishists w/ no intent of meeting in person etc. It’s gotten dangerous too. Here in Wilmington, NC, a trans woman, 25, was beaten to death with a hammer and dismembered, by a guy she met on Grindr. He was caught, but it’s proof that there are still people out there who possess hatred towards our community. Given all the anti-LGBTQ rhetoric out there these days, I don’t see it changing. Sad.

[topblkmale]

On 2/10/2023 at 10:24 AM, Bottom Jim said:

Report to Grindr I he continues report to police Make sure you saved he said was 19 now 15

Reporting this to the local police might not go over too well for none of the parties involved.

 

Its quite possible that this WAS actually law enforcement trying to entrap the poster.

 

For discretion on Grinder I recommend using disappearing pics and NOT talking to anyone under 21 years of age. There are lots of high school age trans kids on Grindr in my neighborhood. (whole other topic for discussion) I immediately block them if they are too close or make ANY kind of contact with my profile. I live in the NE where there are many local jurisdictions and I have been approached at least twice by LEOs aka 'to catch a predator'.

[Bimarried001]

I’ve had this on another site a few times. If this sense you are married they try to get enough info then the extortion begins. 
I refrain from sending face pics or my phone number. I know that me being married is a turn on for some so I share that freely but being married is also the key for potential extortion.