False positives

[Kayne]

I know the mental hell you're going through mate. After I was exposed,  I went through literal years of "False Positive" "fast" tests. Full panel blood testing always insisted that I was Neg.  It was an Emotional Rollercoaster I rode alone because I had some baggage from growing up during the crisis,having lost many people during that time.  I also wrestled with an inevitably complex. from my background.  After my doctor literally mixed up my at the time latest test with another patient, I quit testing and adopted  a "Don't Ask/ Don't Tell Don't Care" attitude.  That probably wasn't the smartest move, but I found the stress of wondering if the results I was staring at were accurate, and checking Web MD against every blotch on my skin, every cut on my gums and every bout of IBS was killing me. 

If I can offer some advice, I'd say use your head. Use any resource you have access to. Keep taking an active interest in your health.  And above all, don'Psych yourself out about it. I spent 16 years at war with myself, not fully embracing myself, All of myself because a test result was defining my life and how i lived it and in my case I wound up Poz anyway. 

 

take from that what you will.  I'm not advocating "letting go" and this isn't about any kink/ fetish I have. I just want you to know how a False positive can shake one up and I'm here for you. 

[sotrue]

7 hours ago, BootmanLA said:

As I understand it, the primary benefit of 4th Gen tests is that by detecting antigens in addition to antibodies, they can "spot" HIV earlier than other tests.

But that antigen testing is also, as I understand it, the reason for many of the false positives (because other things are known to give a reactive result besides the p24 antigens).

For whatever reason, you've had two false positive results from this kind of test. My guess - purely conjecture - is that you have something else in your system that sets them off; as noted, that could be as simple as having had a COVID vaccination and/or a COVID infection in the past. If so - and getting the same false positive result from another source would tend to suggest that's the case - then you might consider whether, given your circumstances, taking a less-sensitive test might serve you better. Especially if you're have a limited-enough "outside the relationship" sex life that your risks aren't that high, generally speaking.

Otherwise, my concern is that every time you take a 4G test and it comes back reactive, you'll be in a mild panic mode, which isn't good for your mental health. 

Sage advice Bootman. As mentioned another lab at the same time as the last false positive determined I was negative — no reflex, nothing. This was a mail-in 4th generation blood test (think CVS has them). Of course I didn’t believe it — maybe I didn’t put enough blood on the card etc. etc. It was silly and foolish and childish.

Time and time again the results despite the false positives came back negative, and in several cases with the mail-in test and the orals just plain negatives. 

The panic is something I need to explore further, you are right, if I’m ever to have any type of mental peace. 

[sotrue]

3 hours ago, Kayne said:

I know the mental hell you're going through mate. After I was exposed,  I went through literal years of "False Positive" "fast" tests. Full panel blood testing always insisted that I was Neg.  It was an Emotional Rollercoaster I rode alone because I had some baggage from growing up during the crisis,having lost many people during that time.  I also wrestled with an inevitably complex. from my background.  After my doctor literally mixed up my at the time latest test with another patient, I quit testing and adopted  a "Don't Ask/ Don't Tell Don't Care" attitude.  That probably wasn't the smartest move, but I found the stress of wondering if the results I was staring at were accurate, and checking Web MD against every blotch on my skin, every cut on my gums and every bout of IBS was killing me. 

If I can offer some advice, I'd say use your head. Use any resource you have access to. Keep taking an active interest in your health.  And above all, don'Psych yourself out about it. I spent 16 years at war with myself, not fully embracing myself, All of myself because a test result was defining my life and how i lived it and in my case I wound up Poz anyway. 

 

take from that what you will.  I'm not advocating "letting go" and this isn't about any kink/ fetish I have. I just want you to know how a False positive can shake one up and I'm here for you. 

Kayne, so did the doctor figure why you were having false positives? I assume you continued to have sex, particularly BB sex, during that long period of false positives? (apologies if that is too personal of a question)? Thanks for any insights. At least in my case the “fast” tests have all been negative. The complete reflex tests in the end were all negative, showing no viral load.

Again I may be part of the minority here, but I want to keep my slutty barebacking fantasies mostly that — as fantasies, or if they became reality with a tested partner. My risk tolerance is low obviously! 
 

I’ll have to wait a few months as I just got a Covid booster and a flu shot a couple of weeks ago. If those are the source of the false positives, it won’t do me any good to test now. Thank you for your support - I am grateful!

[Kayne]

6 hours ago, sotrue said:

Kayne, so did the doctor figure why you were having false positives? I assume you continued to have sex, particularly BB sex, during that long period of false positives? (apologies if that is too personal of a question)? Thanks for any insights. At least in my case the “fast” tests have all been negative. The complete reflex tests in the end were all negative, showing no viral load.

Again I may be part of the minority here, but I want to keep my slutty barebacking fantasies mostly that — as fantasies, or if they became reality with a tested partner. My risk tolerance is low obviously! 
 

I’ll have to wait a few months as I just got a Covid booster and a flu shot a couple of weeks ago. If those are the source of the false positives, it won’t do me any good to test now. Thank you for your support - I am grateful!

Well, in my case, its love been told its likely one of three scenarios.

1. the fast tests were accurate, and the broader panel tests were wrong and I was poz since my original accidental exposure. and my viral load was just so low until my immune system was well and truly overwhelmed.

2. I had chronic fatigue syndrome

3. I was negative until at the very least when an Ex stealthed me,  or I picked the card on my own. could be som combo of the three. though I do know that the activeness of my sex life decreased with the increase of mother's illness to the point where im an incel now. 

but no one has ever given me an answer I could rely on. 

[sotrue]

Hey just wanted to give one final update and some thoughts. I am very thankful for all the comments here that made me think and assess how to go forward. 
 

After a few more tests (all negative) it’s pretty clear that the probable cause of the false positives were due to acute COVID exposure. Especially the last false positive test in August — around that same time I had gotten COVID. There have been multiplying reports of false positives due to COVID infection and some related to vaccines, but the latter seems to be still in conspiracy theory territory. One other probable cause is another medical condition that I’m waiting on imaging for; fingers crossed it’s benign which it probably is.

This all has spurred thinking on what next. I realize that despite the lure of fantasy and my brief foray into bare play that I’m probably not cut out for it. I’m not mentally strong enough to handle the negative implications of getting pozzed. Sure the lure of wanton bare man sex without fear is alluring but not enough to give up what I have, which is comparatively boring but more supportive of my mental health.

I applaud everyone who has mastered the emotional minefields that come with being positive. You are much stronger than me. 

I definitely feel urges, and I won’t lie and say the edginess of it all is enticing. I guess I still have the choice, and my choice is to play a bit safer if at all. Funny as I write this I still have visions in my head of a man on top on me filling me up as I gaze into his eyes. LOL The fantasy realm is where this needs to stay for healthier living.

Again, thanks! If there are any responses I’ll check in. 

[BootmanLA]

2 hours ago, sotrue said:

This all has spurred thinking on what next. I realize that despite the lure of fantasy and my brief foray into bare play that I’m probably not cut out for it. I’m not mentally strong enough to handle the negative implications of getting pozzed. Sure the lure of wanton bare man sex without fear is alluring but not enough to give up what I have, which is comparatively boring but more supportive of my mental health.

I'm sure it's been mentioned before, and I'm not sure what the availability status is for you, wherever you are, but that's exactly what PrEP is designed for. When used as directed, the odds of contracting HIV are infinitesimally small. If PrEP is not available where you are, or it's too expensive, then that's not a solution for you; but if it is, you'd be in a much better position to enjoy bare sex without HIV concerns.

[sotrue]

On 12/29/2023 at 1:01 PM, BootmanLA said:

I'm sure it's been mentioned before, and I'm not sure what the availability status is for you, wherever you are, but that's exactly what PrEP is designed for. When used as directed, the odds of contracting HIV are infinitesimally small. If PrEP is not available where you are, or it's too expensive, then that's not a solution for you; but if it is, you'd be in a much better position to enjoy bare sex without HIV concerns.

Thanks BootmanLA you’re great! Yes, PreP would be the clear option if I wanted to pursue bareback with much reduced risk of HIV. I don’t want the other stuff either, though (free and clear even of HSV-2). For me it’s not just me getting infected with something but infecting my SO. I’d feel terrible. Yes I know…given the site we’re on.
 

If I dare again to think about bareback it’ll have to be if I were single (heaven forbid). I’ll stick with porn for now. The urges are strong but I already deleted Grindr off my phone lol.