How to get started

[yoursinmine]

I've learned that since I'm new, I only get a couple posts per day, and I want to get this here. I'm not only new here, I've never been fucked (though I'm a fucking hero with a cock in my mouth) and that wouldn't be a problem if I was into the soft and sensitive mousey guys here at school, but I want big hands that leave grab marks on my hips and ass, I want big hairy bellies, and someone who doesn't ask and takes what he wants. I want a man who makes me feel small and can show me how to please.

The issue I'm reading here, and have experienced a couple times already, is that they're not interested in breaking me in and doing the work. I get it. 

I assume they're out there, but I'm not sure how to find them. Currently, I'm thinking that I don't want the first thing to go on my ass to be a piece of plastic and I should wait for someone to stretch himself a custom made ass for his cock, but I'm getting impatient. Thoughts? 

 

[bbbear2000]

Sign up to as many sites and apps as possible and just offer ur hole up ro all men who fit ur description.  I'm sure if u r patient enough you'll find the right guy.

If u lived near ro me I'd have happily have been the guy like how u described. 

[yoursinmine]

I have done that, and I suppose the couple rejections isn't all that uncommon, but they seemed quite interested until I told them it would be my first time. One of them offered to let me suck him, but then he flaked. I've considered getting into a regular blow n go relationship, but the last time I tried that, it turned into four years of it. 

Thanks. I'll look you up if I'm ever in Pennsylvania haha

[Marlin]

Go to Toronto for a weekend. Sign in to the apps and visit the bath houses. I guarantee you will get a number of dicks. 

[Sfmike64]

Like learning how to date, the people who don't want to break you in with more aggressive sex are NOT PEOPLE YOU WANT TO PLAY WITH.

Find someone who will be patient with you, respect your limits (even if they pretend you don't have any...EVERYONE has limits and should be explicit about them) and will discuss the scene with you BEFORE you play. Preferably in person. 

Be patient. You're not just looking for a fuck, you're looking to explore BDSM and that's more complicated. Set up a Recon (also Growlr since you're into bears/dads) profile and be explicit about what you've done and have not done and what turns you on and want to explore. A top that's worth your time (and responds to your looks and personality) will make time and respect you and your limits. Try to make friends who are into the scene even if you don't want to fuck them (or vice versa). Having a wingman/mentor can be a very useful thing.

Good luck. That's a nice butt. Someone should be playing with it and telling you you're a dirty faggot. 🙂

[PozBearWI]

11 hours ago, Sfmike64 said:

Like learning how to date, the people who don't want to break you in with more aggressive sex are NOT PEOPLE YOU WANT TO PLAY WITH.

Find someone who will be patient with you, respect your limits (even if they pretend you don't have any...EVERYONE has limits and should be explicit about them) and will discuss the scene with you BEFORE you play. Preferably in person. 

Be patient. You're not just looking for a fuck, you're looking to explore BDSM and that's more complicated. Set up a Recon (also Growlr since you're into bears/dads) profile and be explicit about what you've done and have not done and what turns you on and want to explore. A top that's worth your time (and responds to your looks and personality) will make time and respect you and your limits. Try to make friends who are into the scene even if you don't want to fuck them (or vice versa). Having a wingman/mentor can be a very useful thing.

Good luck. That's a nice butt. Someone should be playing with it and telling you you're a dirty faggot. 🙂

Sadly, not everyone is comfortable being explicit about their what I'll call "operating parameters".  Reluctant or embarrassed to discuss that level of detail.  

I think in our present social media hook up tools; there is an assumption that we adequately express our limits off an option chart; as if that explains why, how, when, where, how?  Honestly it was truly easier when there was more an active bar scene.  When we caught someone's eye we didn't have this incomplete and imperfect dossier pop up over their head... 

[norefusal]

in my experience, asking for it on the apps is a dead end. 

i've gotten it the old school way: just keep going out - bars, clubs, backrooms, saunas, video, parks, rest stops, public toilets etc anywhere guys go for sex if you hang out and take whatever is offered eventually one of these guys who just pounds your hole like he owns it no questions asked comes along - they're def out there. in my experience it's such a turn on your hole opens right up for the right guy. 

[Sfmike64]

10 hours ago, norefusal said:

in my experience, asking for it on the apps is a dead end. 

i've gotten it the old school way: just keep going out - bars, clubs, backrooms, saunas, video, parks, rest stops, public toilets etc anywhere guys go for sex if you hang out and take whatever is offered eventually one of these guys who just pounds your hole like he owns it no questions asked comes along - they're def out there. in my experience it's such a turn on your hole opens right up for the right guy. 

That's a fair point. But no reason you can't proceed on all fronts. Use the apps but also go out. It's the same advice I'd give a vanilla person.

[yoursinmine]

On 1/19/2025 at 7:59 PM, Sfmike64 said:

Like learning how to date, the people who don't want to break you in with more aggressive sex are NOT PEOPLE YOU WANT TO PLAY WITH.

Find someone who will be patient with you, respect your limits (even if they pretend you don't have any...EVERYONE has limits and should be explicit about them) and will discuss the scene with you BEFORE you play. Preferably in person. 

Be patient. You're not just looking for a fuck, you're looking to explore BDSM and that's more complicated. Set up a Recon (also Growlr since you're into bears/dads) profile and be explicit about what you've done and have not done and what turns you on and want to explore. A top that's worth your time (and responds to your looks and personality) will make time and respect you and your limits. Try to make friends who are into the scene even if you don't want to fuck them (or vice versa). Having a wingman/mentor can be a very useful thing.

Good luck. That's a nice butt. Someone should be playing with it and telling you you're a dirty faggot. 🙂

This is really helpful, and encouraging. Great advice. Thank you, I'd give you the head of your life if you were standing over me. 

It is a nice ass, haha, it really shouldn't go to waste. 

15 hours ago, PozBearWI said:

Sadly, not everyone is comfortable being explicit about their what I'll call "operating parameters".  Reluctant or embarrassed to discuss that level of detail.  

I think in our present social media hook up tools; there is an assumption that we adequately express our limits off an option chart; as if that explains why, how, when, where, how?  Honestly it was truly easier when there was more an active bar scene.  When we caught someone's eye we didn't have this incomplete and imperfect dossier pop up over their head... 

I found my first bf at a bar.  Sadly he was only interested in getting head but, yeah, now that I'm finally old enough to (legally) go to bars (in Canada), it's pretty dire. 

14 hours ago, norefusal said:

in my experience, asking for it on the apps is a dead end. 

i've gotten it the old school way: just keep going out - bars, clubs, backrooms, saunas, video, parks, rest stops, public toilets etc anywhere guys go for sex if you hang out and take whatever is offered eventually one of these guys who just pounds your hole like he owns it no questions asked comes along - they're def out there. in my experience it's such a turn on your hole opens right up for the right guy. 

Mmm, this sounds hot. No luck yet, too shy/scared to go cruising, but I'm working up to it. 

I'm not looking for the perfect guy, just someone who has more than five minutes to spend with me, I suppose. Until then, I'll let jerking off reading all the stories you all post.