Border Crossings, Memes and Truths

[DevilDawg]

Back in the 90's all you needed to cross into Canada was some sort of ID to walk, drive, fly, ride, etc. For first timers, you can always be expected to get some level of search. My first passported flight to Quebec was on government business and cursory back in 2008. My first passported drive into Ontario, I was bringing coctail party decorations for a leather run which had the entire back end of my Jeep Cherokee maxed out. I was refused entry into Canada because my rear view mirror was obstructed. I politely asked what about vehicles pulling campers? Despite my having side mirrors and the good sense to use them, I had to return across the Niagara Rainbow Bridge and explain why Canada had turned me back. I went back throgh US lanes and then to the NY State Park on Goat Island. Some of the decorations were for a 40th Anniversary. 40 being Ruby, I had a complete (borrowed) mannequin of Wicked Witch legs, striped stockings, ruby slippers, the works - along with other stuff for the party decorations. I strapped the legs and a few other items to my roof rack and turned to reenter Ontario. Those were the rules and ya never get anywhere by being obstinate with Customs and Border folks. The absurdity of me zipping up the QEW with a wicked witch half strapped to my roof rack still makes me smile. The other side of the humor coin was when they were going through the party décor pile, they pulled out a cooler and opened it. No, I was not smuggling or bootlegging to two short blonde female Border Officers reached in and pulled out one of those 9 Ft inflatable Pink Penis Pool Toys which they quickly stuffed back in. While I'm sure this caused an odd profile entry against my name, it was obvious I had Dick on my mind which was not illegal in Canada. -  This last trip in returning, it is just as well that I did not get searched with the news that having unflattering king memes and vice king mems can get you sent to the gulag or worse. I did of course declare on my US return a water bottle.....

[DevilDawg]

But did not provide the details - of course less is more unless you are talking about penis'