I'm going to try being sub for a change. Any advice?

[Eagerindayton]

So I am usually a dom top kind of guy. I've met a new guy that has a strong dom presence - and that is really turning me on. I've decided to play as his sub this weekend. I am definitely going to get fucked raw and hard. I've told him I'm not that great at giving head - I guess I should have paid closer attention during the thousands of blow jobs I've received. 🙂 Anyway, what I do know is that he does like to play hard - so do I - he's told me he likes a loud bottom and enjoys smacking ass. I'm going to make sure that my guts are definitely cleaned out. I'm not really expecting any leeway from him as I've told him that I want to try this. I've told him no shit, blood or lasting marks. Any other advice? I'm looking forward to getting fucked - even though I'm into topping - when I can - I am looking forward to taking his 8" I cock cock up my ass. Any advice? Suggestions? Please let me know. Thanks 

[BarebackedBear]

Enjoy it is my only advice. Being a sub is more of a headspace than a physical thing. You've got to enjoy it and want it because your sole purpose is to be used when you're a sub. The pleasure comes from the service.

My first time giving myself over to a Dom still lives rent free in my mind decades later. There was no going back after that.

[Eagerindayton]

10 minutes ago, BarebackedBear said:

Enjoy it is my only advice. Being a sub is more of a headspace than a physical thing. You've got to enjoy it and want it because your sole purpose is to be used when you're a sub. The pleasure comes from the service.

My first time giving myself over to a Dom still lives rent free in my mind decades later. There was no going back after that.

Thanks for your advise. Yeah it's is about headspace - and I'm getting close to desperately wanting with this specific person.  Wish me luck!!

[BarebackedBear]

5 minutes ago, Eagerindayton said:

Thanks for your advise. Yeah it's is about headspace - and I'm getting close to desperately wanting with this specific person.  Wish me luck!!

If this guy is as big as you said and you're primarily a top, be ready for it to be painful. Some Doms will focus on gently easing a less experienced bottom into it, some will use you as their property from the start, some will take pleasure in making it painful and seeing you struggle to take them. Depends on the Dom.

Hopefully you've discussed this ahead of time and agreed on a safe word. I'd advise against going without a safe word until the two of you have developed a high level of trust and learned each other's rhythms.

[Eagerindayton]

1 minute ago, BarebackedBear said:

If this guy is as big as you said and you're primarily a top, be ready for it to be painful. Some Doms will focus on gently easing a less experienced bottom into it, some will use you as their property from the start, some will take pleasure in making it painful and seeing you struggle to take them. Depends on the Dom.

Hopefully you've discussed this ahead of time and agreed on a safe word. I'd advise against going without a safe word until the two of you have developed a high level of trust and learned each other's rhythms.

Thanks. There will be a safe word - we have agreed on that. I am usually a top, but man I do love getting fucked raw sometimes. I am in one of those moods now. It won't be for another week - from Saturday - so I've got time to get even more prepared. If he wants to fuck me with pain I'll be ok with that as long as it's raw. Thanks for you advice and suggestions! 

[BBBxCumDumpster]

2 hours ago, Eagerindayton said:

So I am usually a dom top kind of guy. I've met a new guy that has a strong dom presence - and that is really turning me on. I've decided to play as his sub this weekend. I am definitely going to get fucked raw and hard. I've told him I'm not that great at giving head - I guess I should have paid closer attention during the thousands of blow jobs I've received. 🙂 Anyway, what I do know is that he does like to play hard - so do I - he's told me he likes a loud bottom and enjoys smacking ass. I'm going to make sure that my guts are definitely cleaned out. I'm not really expecting any leeway from him as I've told him that I want to try this. I've told him no shit, blood or lasting marks. Any other advice? I'm looking forward to getting fucked - even though I'm into topping - when I can - I am looking forward to taking his 8" I cock cock up my ass. Any advice? Suggestions? Please let me know. Thanks 

I say see what you can learn to make the experience better for you and  your  future bottoms. This experience can make you a better top if you return to topping or if you become verse.

[Eagerindayton]

10 minutes ago, BBBxCumDumpster said:

I say see what you can learn to make the experience better for you and  your  future bottoms. This experience can make you a better top if you return to topping or if you become verse.

Thanks! I actually agree with you!

[Njn0mc]

17 hours ago, BarebackedBear said:

My first time giving myself over to a Dom still lives rent free in my mind decades later. There was no going back after that.

Im the same! My 1st time with a dom also had to be 10 years ago is always still in my mind that I still jerkoff to it.

Tied blindfolded and he pounded multiple times that night! Im always chasing that type. 

[hntnhole]

Sounds to me like you've already accomplished the most important part of the negotiation - that being making your limits clear, and he accepted them. 

The rest is just submersing your mind and body in the pleasure !!!  

[Eagerindayton]

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

Sounds to me like you've already accomplished the most important part of the negotiation - that being making your limits clear, and he accepted them. 

The rest is just submersing your mind and body in the pleasure !!!  

Thanks for your input!

[Eagerindayton]

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

Sounds to me like you've already accomplished the most important part of the negotiation - that being making your limits clear, and he accepted them. 

The rest is just submersing your mind and body in the pleasure !!!  

Thanks and that's what I'm looking forward too.

[NHeat]

I've recently gotten into my first Dom/sub relationship. In fact, I collared my sub today. He has more experience with this than I do so he is teaching me a lot (and we're having lots of fun).

What I never realized was how much it's about power. Really the sub has as much (or more) power than the Dom. The sub decides what can be done to him. Just remember communication and trust are vital. And let him know you're new to all this. Good luck!

[Eagerindayton]

10 hours ago, NHeat said:

I've recently gotten into my first Dom/sub relationship. In fact, I collared my sub today. He has more experience with this than I do so he is teaching me a lot (and we're having lots of fun).

What I never realized was how much it's about power. Really the sub has as much (or more) power than the Dom. The sub decides what can be done to him. Just remember communication and trust are vital. And let him know you're new to all this. Good luck!

Thanks for the advice ! Best wishes for you and you're sub.

[URS2USE]

10 hours ago, NHeat said:

Really the sub has as much (or more) power than the Dom. The sub decides what can be done to him.

i have been a sub for two past Owners and have been taught a LOT during each Ownership about being a good sub.  Yes, i agree that safe words are essential, plus limits and building up trust in each other are important as well.  But i have to disagree with the statement i quoted above.  A sub's "job" is to surrender, submit and serve it's Dom/me, not to try and "Top" from the bottom.  If my Dom/me wants to blindfold me, tie me to a tree out in the backyard and invite friends over using me as a centerpiece for a party (and W/e have mutually agreed on this), then it is Their choice, PERIOD!  A good sub surrenders it's power to it's Dom/me.

When i would go into a session, i went in knowing that i would submit to my Dom/me's wishes and would be honored and thankful for Their attention.  my "power" was never an option.

[KneelerForDoms]

The sub exerts "negative power." that is, through setting limits, the sub constrains the dom from certain behaviors. The sub also retains the power to withdraw consent (another form of negative power). The dominant partner's authority exists inside the limits granted. The sub doesn't direct what happens, but they effect what doesn't happen.

Negative power is different from covert control (i.e. topping from the power). Negative power doesn't mean disguised methods of steering outcome. That's not subbing.