skeptik73

Putting this so-far fruitless search on hold while I reclaim full mental faculties, and reassess priorities. Addressing the underlying current of typical male lonliness in a better way.

My mind -- it comes -- it goes. Now I'm brainstorming a world, a fiction... can't share. But must observe, must observe what is real to get some more ideas. Want to talk about the top/bottom control thing. Leg hairs growing back, not going to do that again -- I might trim my eyebrows again though, that went pretty well. Need to get out more. Fulfillment is fleeting.

It is hard to let go of old expectations of what a male social environment should be. After a few tickles and scratches of that “yes” button... I see again the shallow, the underlying fragility, the judging, the jockeying, the setting up of what we desire and minimizing of what we dislike. Nothing will ever be shiny enough for long enough. Enjoy each moment. Care, but want nothing. Want as little as possible. But care. I stopped caring.... about this, and then about that. And I had to search harder and harder for things I cared about. I stopped caring about the human race, but I cared enough about our planet that I thought she should be spared from us. I stopped caring about whether I’d die soon but I still cared about staying healthy enough to work and not be a burden while I was alive. I had mixed feelings about apathy. The choice to not care is empowering. The choice to care is draining. it is hard to stop caring about this though. All the social programming in my head that tells me what is desirable. And what is detestable. TV has shaped virtually all of us, and our peer circles. None of that was ever necessary. I had a sad. There is no win. Except to be happy anyway. Again I find I want to be a robot, a happy robot, choosing the best value path, free from even my own subjective value judgements.

I’m realizing I liked that Australian guy too much for my own good. Echos of that unmistakeabie turned on state from his ordering me to shave, and the drive and seriousness on his handsome face — I think I’d have accepted and encouraged any and all selfishness he entertained. Both of us under the influence— my assessment now is he’s not going to even email me back. And if this pinnacle is folly, I wonder what is there In sex period. i don’t think my vision is wrong. This can be — but not with the substance that warps and lies to us.

Sometimes you meet someone, and even though its online, everything just click and you realize you are meant to be with a guy like him. Unfortunately he's in australia. He's 30, white, bareback top, 6'1", solid hwp body, not defined though, handsome, goatee, into sexual control and making his bottom guys shave down all over. Nice deep voice, serious look, and fucking hung too (just a nice bonus that). And is past few bfs were all over 40. I'm 44, and also married to a great guy in an open relationship. I emailed him, don't know if he'll email me back, but I want to be with a guy like that, more than anything. Wrong continent, but I want to pick his brain, understand that ticking I'll leave it at that. I'm gwm, 44, 5'8" 145#, in a committed relationship. Like to keep myself shaved down anyway, and like to top shaved/smooth holes too. Been more top this year, but was already looking to get back to my bottom/sub roots. I'm not a big traveller, but mid-atlantic is good, and I have been keeping rather too focused on sex, due to habits. But the guy I am looking for probably is too -- focused on exploring that sexual control and with his dick throbbing for the shaved holes he controls. This control stuff does not extend out of play to any significant extent 30 is a good rough minimum for this, but can work with younger, and older is great. White/Hispanic preferred, but if you are one of those black guys that's big into white guys and all the rest of this.... that is hot too. Lack of the bad habit is also not a deal breaker -- if you are good with the focus on fucking/breeding. Liking group play to some extend probably also required I probably need to work on tailoring this to the type of guy I'm after here. He probably did not make it to the end of this. :-/ He probably also was expecting pics. Even if we don't hit it off for whatever reason.... want to meet guys like this. Hits my fucking spot. I guess you can email me here, then we can take it elsewhere.

It's okay to PM me. It's okay to post here. And I'm not going to try to get people to play cards, like I tried to last year (ha). Trying to be more attuned to what other men want. Music? Porn? Things like that.

I have a room. Looking for men to help facilitate a fun atmosphere of action. Open to ideas. Open to hooking up too. I'm 44, 5'8" #160 buzzed head, WM. Education can be fun but the talking goes into small talk and more talk... and some talk is good, but we are there to fuck. I don't want to just post on bbrt for myself just yet. Who wants to be fucking me while the door is propped open?

Six weeks away now. I keep checking back here and nothing. Isn't this a thing? Maybe I will just play world of Warcraft and Overwatch in my room all weekend instead. Any lurkers out there want to pipe up and say anything?

Without the top noticing I mean.

Getting the condom off inside you is hard. I have done it, but usually would fail. Actually pulling it out of your ass though.... that had to be staged. Notice you don't see much of the top's dick. It's a hot scene, but harder to pull off with a big dick.

I was there during CLAW two years ago. But what I see online on the Flex website looks more like a hotel, and it claims to be a spa. What I remember is more of a three story warehouse with a bar attached. I was at CLAW last year too but I did not go to Flex. Can someone fill me in on what the place is actually like now and what all goes on there? Are they using pictures of Flex in other locations?

I will say also that I definitely dig the atmosphere at flex, but I don't see anything stopping us from making our own play spaces at the hotel. How safe is the walk from flex to the westin? Looks like its about a 20 minute walk, so feasible at least.

It really doesn't need to be a competition. If you make it one, then it should at least be a friendly fun one. We're all on the same side. I'll be staying there at the Westin, avoiding the condom crowd in the official play space. I'll be there with friends but with my own room and a particular friend I hope will be joining me. Watching can be just as much fun.

Those of us that take it up the butt.... the more enthusiastic about it we are... that is what slutty is. Topping is part of a necessary biological function. Taking it up the butt is a kind of makeshift solution to satisify the physical need for stimulation of guys who have no sexual interest in females. Bottoms are a sort of willing brainwashees. For the cause. Hopefully, over time, an increasing flood FTMs will make bottoming obsolete. In this light, I don't see it as a double standard.

My quick 2 cents is that you totally deserved each other. Listen to these guys though ^^^. Just being open to what your brothers are saying matters a great deal. You should totally report him for the veiled threat though if you haven't already.

I was 15, clueless, and just wanted intimacy basically. He was 13, and much more worldly and just wanted me to blow him, but then he wanted to try and fuck me. It seemed like a good idea until the actual penetration, which was raw, but it was really brief because I wasn't having any of that (it just fucking hurt). I didn't get fucked again for another five years after that. If we discount that first non-starter, the next time, when I was 20, I dutifully made sure the guy wore a rubber. And it was awful, partly due to the rubber, but also because I wasn't into the guy. It was at least another year before I really got started taking cock and cum, usually bareback if I had my way. By the time I was 23, I had had two relationships that I stopped pursuing because they were condom only guys. I knew what I wanted. And I can't help but reflect that I'm glad its 2013 and not 1996. Or 1993. Or 1988.

I was there last night too, from about 12:15 - 1:45. Part of me wanted to stay, but I was so tired and wanted to get home and get some sleep before I was too tired to drive. Got fucked by a bearded Hispanic guy shortly after I got there. He had a sturdy beard, about 7" cock. We hardly spoke. I made sure the condoms were out of sight under the cushion. He took a hit of my poppers and pushed into me, and fucked me for a good 10 minutes in different positions before shooting inside my ass. Roamed around for a bit after that. Fooled around with a heavyset hairy bottom guy. He was friendly and very willing. I tried to fuck him, but I was having trouble staying hard after having bottomed. Wasn't really into him, but he was a nice guy. Next, an Asian guy was passing by my room, and we caught each other's eye. Slim to Average build, smooth (of course). I usually don't go for Asian guys, but it was kind of slow and I was feeling social and more open than usual. He was a good kisser and had a great touch as he massaged my shoulders. Before we kissed, I was a little apprehensive due to vivid memories of hooking up with Asian guys that had bad breath when I was back in college some 15+ years ago. Was relieved that his breath/mouth tasted pleasantly... I couldn't place exactly what I was tasting, it wasn't minty or fruity, but it definitely wasn't bad. I wasn't really getting hard, but I had a blast with him just the same. Only disappointment was, when it came time to fuck, I could definitely tell he wanted a rubber. And I pulled one out from under the cushion. Getting fucked with a rubber is a little harder on my ass, and before he was able to finish, I had just about reached my limit and was trying to send him on his way. But he was persistent in a sly sort of way and pushed back in me, and in the end managed to shoot his load in the condom. More power to him, I guess. The best was last though. We had been checking each other out throughout the night. He was kind of just my type... handsome, shaved head, average/fit build, probably not quite 6 feet tall, and moved around the place with a natural confidence. Was already thrilled to have him in my room, and from the get go, he asks me point blank, "do you bareback?" I'm usually a lot more subtle and this caught me off guard. I *wish* I would have said something like "is there any other way to fuck?" But somewhat stupefied, I just replied "yes", and we moved naturally into getting more cozy. After we had established a momentum where we both had confidence where this was going, he asked me if I was poz. I replied that I was, and he said that he didn't know his status, and didn't care -- he just always fucked bare (more to it than that, but that's the general idea). He had a thick cock, at least 8", maybe 8.5".... and at any rate it was fucking perfect and I wouldn't have wanted any bigger. After the poppers helped relax me, I was taking it like a champ, and he was pounding me hole from behind, then facing me with my legs pushed back, and the from behind again. He stayed rock hard the whole time, despite that he had been tweaking a little earlier, and according to him without any erectile assistance. He didn't cum, but he fucked me, and fucked me, and after taking a little break (which I needed) where we talked and he mentioned coyly that he could steal me from my husband, I found myself very aroused and semi-hard. I wasn't too surprised that he wanted me to fuck him, and it made me a little harder and I did manage to push past the tightness of his hole and fuck him for maybe 20 seconds before petering out. And somehow we end up on the subject of tweaking, and he says that since I never have, I shouldn't start, or I'll have an even tougher time staying hard. Good advice. So I am still aroused, and he's laying on his back. I've been cuddled up beside him and he is still rock hard. I'm not sure I believe he's not on Viagra or something, but of course I don't care. I climb back on his pole, and we both take a hit of poppers and mutually pound our bodies together at our point of natural fusion. I want his cum so bad, but I'm the one who shoots my load. Haven't cum so hard in a long time. We linger in the moment close together. He asks if I'm going to head home now. I'm still all flush and I replied in the negative. I'm staying, I just need a break. We resolve to exchange numbers before we leave, and he leaves my room joking about the "walk of shame".... though we both are well enough that I was yelping and moaning so much during that time, he must have been kind of proud. A few minutes later, the poppers wear off entirely and I discover I'm much more tired than I had thought. So I rest a bit, and after about ten minutes, when I'm still tired, I start to get my things together and get dressed. I want to track this stud down and make sure he has my number. I find him in the hallway, and though he doesn't have his phone on him, or a paper/pen to write anything down, he implies casually that he can remember all it, and after I dictate all 10 digits twice.... he indicates by his expressions that he has found a way to remember them all, and that he'd head straight back to his room and send me a text. And I make my way out. I get to my car... no text. Get back to my house... no text. Wake up the next morning, no text. Maybe he was just being considerate and trying not be a threat to my relationship. But really after almost 15 years, my relationship is established enough.... and has been always open, at least sexually. And its just sex, right? Right? Maybe he will call me eventually. Maybe not. At any rate, it was an awesome night I will never forget. Sorry to hijack your thread and that I didn't run into you.