losttop
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Everything posted by losttop
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I don't discuss my sexlife with family...but my friends all know I fuck bare and have sex with others although I'm in relationship. My relationship is open so it's not a problem.
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really? Is that what u get from it? Not looking for sympathy here....just venting my issues and kind of trying to find explanations for his behaviour.... In case u missed it.... I'm into whoring out guys and fuck a lot when I'm on the road for work and at home not so much out of respect for my bf. The only thing that I find frustrating and that should be clear by now...is that he can only be a pig when he uses meth....why do most of my other FBs don't need that? That we r not suited for each other is clear...I'm just rrying to make a bad situation more sustainable....as it's very easy to say break up.... But I do enjoy the lifestyle I'm having now. With other words: I need his money! I'm not a masochist.... U got the picture now sweetheart?
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The issues r with same bf...never have had such issues with previous boyfriends like this.... Sometimes I would break up and other times the other one would break up. I'm not looking for a husband...I'm looking for a partner who is the same as me: pretty easy going that enjoys travelling but also enjoys being a pig together. TravelLing the world and meeting other guys for friendship and sex. Someone who is also trustworthy obviously.... Not that this one is not trustworthy....quite on the contrary... I have never caught him on a lie. It just frustrates me that he can be such a pig with others and with me most of the time he is like sexually repressed. And I don't understand why as I like him being a pig with me and others...I could also be selfish and say what the fuck let him use drugs so at least he is always a pig. But would that make me a good bf? In my eyes it wouldn't. Just wish he wouldn't need the drugs to be the person I would like my bf to be.
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Touché ! I wouldn't call myself insane...but therapy would most defenitely help.... Maybe I'm following my moms footsteps....she is married to this asshole for over 50 years now...I resent him but I also love him as he is my dad...have a feeling that's what it is...As I seem not to like the nice guys. Sorry to bother u guys with my bs and hope that my future posting will be more upbeat!
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Although I don't like that he PNP I don't mind it so much as he does it on occasions and normally when I'm not around. What I find frustrating is that he then becomes a true cumslut and when he is with me, he is most of the time this fucking repressed asshole! We r talking about the issue though about to make him less repressed without doing drugs.... What also bothers me is that he has conversations with me about not doing drugs and he is going to look for therapy and that he shouldn't be such a whore...and then few hrs later like nothing happened he is looking to hook up with everyone that will breed his hole. When he is sober he will accuse me of sleeping with just anyone...while I have checked some of the profiles of guys he hooks up with and these r far from attractive or young...then I think ....u r a fucking hypocrite!
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I do get off on the fact that he gets used by others but I don't necessarily understand the PNP part. He gets all paranoïde And thinks that people r after HIM .trust me I know we r done...
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Thanks everyone for all ur advise. I'm not happy at times in this relationship And don't like the use of drugs...
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I don't like tweakers walking in and out of our house no. I know what he is up to when I'm away as he tells me and I do same.... So no problem there.... He has issues yes.... What really bothers me is the drug aspect. And I do agree with u.... Our relationship is somewhat strange and I start to resent him for that...
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My bf does occasionally PNP and then he becomes a cum crazed junkie inviting all kind of guys over to our home. When he is with me he doesn't do it as I don't PNP. He is then rather repressed.He is open about it though and we do have a open relationship.... I do like to invite other guys over to tag team him but most of the time he is not up for it. As I travel a lot and enjoy whoring out guys I enjoy inviting tops over to breed some slut. Most of the time he is then very critical about the guys that come to my partys but when he is high I know that he invites guys over that r less than "pretty" so to speak....is he being an HYPOCYTE or am I? The truth of the matter is that I enjoy sharing him with other guys but don't like necessary to transform our home into a sexclub. I rather do it while we r in a strange city. The city and the community where we live is kind of small and it kind of bothers me that people would talk about us when we go out.... Should I not care? The truth of the matter is that I start to resent him for it.... I find the whole PNP scene such a looser scene.... Am I maybe over reacting?
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No need to apoligize at all! I appreciate ur input very much. U gave ur honest opinion and I appreciate that. We have open relationship so cheating is not an issue. In all fairness he has always been honest about his hook ups. It just frustrates me that he won't suck my dick when we r 1-1 and he does it with others. Only when we play together with others he will suck my dick.... Sorry for putting it so bluntly. I feel exactly what u have felt.... I feel less of a man...wondering what's wrong with me...I'm sorry u still feel the way u do about him as I know it takes time.... I also wish I didn't care about him but I do.... But that won't prevent me from leaving him though...I know that in the end I will choose for myself...
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u r bit harsh but I defenitely can c where u r coming from...I really don't think things will improve either...but u must not forget that I have moved homes to be with this man. I will finish it when right time comes. I do love him and I know he has lots of baggage...I just don't know if I can or want to handle it.
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I know that it's not like a relationship should be....there r times that I do feel very close to him and other times I just resent him. He can be caring but he also has a mean streak to him. He is highly intelligent and very witty. I'm more the type u get what u c. Like he will send me like messages with bit double meanings and that leave me confused....I like it to be straight forward and simple....most of the times I think he plays mind games.... Other times I think he is just goofy. Either way..., I don't feel good being with him and that's the real issue. The problem is that I have just moved from Europe across the pond to have a live with him. Don't want to take hasty decisions.... But if it gets unbearable I will go or back to Europe or stay in the US. Fortunately I am financially depending on him. I have good well paying job with lots of travel involved. It's complicated....but in the end I will choose what's good for me.
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Sometimes he is really loving and caring....maybe it's my fault for showing him that I care a lot about him. I just don't understand how he can be so cold at times. He doesn't drink much.... But sometimes when we go out, he can overdo it and he can become this monster...the other day we went out and he was picking fights with people.... Some of them came to me and asked is that ur friend!? Then we went to other place and he started being mr. Nice guy to everyone. By that time I just felt pissed off with him and started acting like distant so these people thought I was horrible and he was mr. Nice guy. Sexually is not that great either...for some reason he doesn't like oral sex with me while he does it with others.... Which is frustrating and I think is disrespectful.Sometimes I just feel sad and alone...almost numb. I know I should break it up if things don't improve fast.
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My bf has this tendency of only noticing when I make negative remarks about him, but apparently it's ok when he makes negative remarks about me...don't get me wrong I'm not a saint in anyway and I have said some nasty remarks in the past but I always recognize this and he doesn't. I consider myself to be a loving person towards my bf. I always try to make him feel good and stand by him always even when I know he is wrong. He is bit of a belly but I always let him know that it doesn't matter and that I love him no matter what size he is...I also compliment him on how sexy he looks in certain outfits...he on the other hand has said that he doesn't like me if I gain weight and sometimes he makes remarks like : r u really wearing that? I would lie if I would say that it does not bother me...because it does. He always tries to come across towards my friends as a really nice guy.... But in fact he is not. Sometimes it seems that he enjoys putting me down to mask his own insecurities. I love him but sometimes I wonder if I should stay with him...he makes me feel insecure and unwanted at times...if I try to talk about it he tells me that I overreact...what do u guys think? How should I approach this?
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I enjoy both type of bottoms. I prefer sub as it's just easier.... But I also love power bottoms that will use my dick to get what they want as well!
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Exactly why lie? It was so obvious this guys hole was full of cum.... I kept fucking it out and my dick was all coated with jizz. Relationships and sex r complicated.think it has to do with upbringing as well. It's almost like he is ashamed of it or something. Like he thinks I would think less of him or something. But he has his moments that he is very slutty...one weekend we went somewhere and that there was lots of fucking involved of us and others.... He smoked some Tina on those days and he was a real greedy pig.. I loved it! But when we got home he told me he didn't want to be that way and that he didn't like it when it happened.He is honest guy who doesn't lie if he hooks up with someone when I'm not around or even when I'm around.... I don't mind. In fact I encourage it. In fact the other day he had guy over who left his hole all cummy.... I enjoyed eating him out afterwards and fucking and breeding him afterwards. In fact I was hoping he would have more guys over.... But he was done. It can be frustrating but I love the guy and he lets me do my thing with others as well so it keeps me happy.but if I would have my way there would be a lot more fucking and me looking for other tops to breed him.
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Well u r right it is confusing...but it's pretty easy.... Most of the time he can only be a slut when he uses drugs... I don't do drugs so he has to do it with people who do...he likes me obviously as a person and sexually I just have more sexual appetite! No he is not with me for the money as he makes more than I do...and before u ask.... I'm not with him because of his money either!
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lol! yes he can be sexually...its almost like he is ashamed of being a slut. the only times he is a slut is when he smokes tina... but i dont do drugs so thats bit of a problem. but i know he uses it occasonally with some of his fb which i find disturbing.
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u only dont get attention if u r out of shape...
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its amazing how some body sluts can lie about having loads in them. the other day i had some slut over and he obviously had few loads in him which i love! when i asked him about it... he told me i would be the first one! i fucking wanted to lap the lieing cunt! lol. the other day my bf had some guy over who filled him up good.... i really enjoyed eating out his hole and sticking my cock up his slutty freshly seeded cunt. i didnt take long to bust my nut into him. i was hoping he would have some more guys over to add their loads to the mix .... but the boring cunt was done...lol. what about u guys... any thughts on this?
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Being direct is best way that works best for me too.... I have had guys that found my approach rude.... But it's hook up site not a dating site..most guys like when u r direct though.... I hate it when people use the phrase....how r u? That's just lame in my book....don't like endless emails either 5 or less should close the deal...
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Sex with my actual bf is not going that well...have feeling that he does not enjoys it that that much with me... We have sex like every 2 weeks and even then it's kind of uninspiring...we have open relationship and so I do occasionally have someone come over... But he is hardly ever for sharing a bottom together or him being the bottom that I can share with other tops. I organize sometimes gangbangs for other bottom FBs of mine. I always do this on my travels As I don't like to do it in the house that I share together with my bf. He accuses me of being on hookup sites all the time but when I'm away from home on business trip I c that he is online the same day I leave...I find this kind of offensive.the other day I confronted him about it and he got upset with me and accused me of not trusting him. He tells me he would tell me if he would hook up with someone...the truth is that I never called him on a lie and I know he is honest about stuff. This afternoon I saw that he was online again but i didn't mention anything about it...I send him msg that tmw I was hooking up with some guy and that I had booked hotel for IML. I was hoping he would mention he would say he had been on line but he didn't...he told me straight away he was not going to IML. But about my hook up or something else he didn't say anything. I know we have kind of open relationship but wouldn't it be a normal reaction to ask stuff when I hook up with other guys? It's like he doesn't care! He told me he doesn't like that I check on him like a jealous gf as he calls it...I don't want to loose him.... But it's making me unhappy...shouldn't I be having fun together with my bf in first place instead of with my FBs?
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true....lol. U don't have to read or respond to it though....
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I don't consider sex the barometer of my relationship because if I did it would be long over! It just gets to me that it's like he represses his sexual feelings for me.... I know he can be total pig with others and he has been with me as well. Like yesterday we had sex and first thing he says before is "be quick".... And yesterday we were talking about sex and he said something like "good sex u have with strangers".... I like to have sex with others and I do and I like him to do the same.... But I also like me time with my own bf! Don't think that's too much to ask. It's like he is ashamed when I ask him to have other tops join us. Sex is supposed to be fun...have enough of him letting me feel like a perv for suggesting to spice up our love life.
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moved in with my bf few months back and it's not going as well as expected...I have much more of a sexual appetite than he does...90% of the time I have to initiate sex and a lot of times he refuses it. He always comes up with excuses like I'm tired, I don't have time or I'm not clean. I love to whore him out to other top guys or use a bottom together but he is less and less into that. Unless he smokes meth then he gets very piggy...but truth of the matter is that I don't use drugs besides poppers. We have open relationship so we play alone and with others. He says that I can play with others which I do when I'm away for work....but sometimes I just want to have fun with my own bf. I know he likes tall guys and I'm not so tall...people think when they c us together that I'm the bottom. Due to this I started doubting myself...am I attractive enough...does he prefer someone else?im not jealous person but due to the lack of sex if find myself being jealous if I think he is looking at others when we go out. Maybe I'm over dramatizing things and I should just have sex with others and sometimes with him. i do love him and I know he loves me but is that enough? He makes me feel like a perv at times and I know that in the past he likes to be somebody's fuckwhore for the night but with me he doesn't seem able to be that unless there r drugs involved...im always trying to involve him in my sexual adventure but most of the time he is not interested....
