Forced sex and control

[Guest sickhog]

am i strange to want to be forced - in most ways. i am inked and pierced and want more without choice, and in a scene. pig also likes to play hard and dirty - but cna also switch with the right pig(s). Comments? thanks.

[breedmeup]

No your not strange. I have sought the same all my life with the addition of chastity. have a 0g PA that is a result of this.

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

Little is sex is truly "strange". We're human and seem to crave variety... On balance, my life position is that we're all equals - and so I am neither above nor below anyone else... That said; indeed, sometimes it is wonderful to just turn over control of the play to someone else - and whatever they choose, rules the play that time. That has exposed me to things I might have missed, and has enriched my sexual experience. (hey, we've gotta do somethings we're not used to in order to become true "slut" status... ).

[bearbandit]

Not strange at all: you're basically talking about a rape fantasy in a slightly different setting. I was raped when I was 19, would have reported it to the police except at the time the age of consent was 21 and therefore my evidence would incriminate me in acts of gross indecency. Not worth the jail time. For a long time I let this traumatic event rule my life. In the end, nearly twenty years later, having counselled a number of rape victims myself (the organisation set up to help male rape victims in the UK is called SurvivorsUK, having originally been named Survivors was named by one of my clients who set it up in response to my use of the word), John commented that we really needed to a stop word. Apparently practically the entire time he had me in the playroom I used the word "no" to mean "yes". It was fucking his head up that I was apparently screaming "rape" every time we fucked, whereas as far as I was concerned I was having the time of my life. We settled on the traffic light system with "green" meaning "stop worrying and get back into role", "amber" indicating caution required and if you're going to ramp it up, take it slowly. And of course "red" being the absolute showstopper: we need to talk this one through over a drink and not in here.

I found "amber" difficult enough to say when bottoming and "red" practically impossible. By that stage of our relationship he was permanently top, but if I brought someone home we used the same system and when we ran parties, ignoring a red was courting a lifetime ban. That said, actually using the stop word I found very difficult. John almost always involved cigars somewhere in sex - I had his initials on my chest for a year or so - even when I thought I couldn't go on, the shame of using a stop word kept me going, so you could almost say that those brands were against my will even though I wore them with pride. Part of the paradox of BDSM?