self brainwashing

[dfwrattan]

I will read this twice a day, every day

Ooh, it’s so fucking good in my ass!

I will do all these things without regard for my personal safety or health

Degrade me

I will brainwash myself with this

Humiliate me

I am no longer a straight male, I am a submissive gay faggot

I will offer my pure disease-free body to HIV POZ men so that they can infect me with AIDS – I’ve thought about this for a long time, now it’s time to do it for real.

Abuse me

I will make my body lean and hard so that men will want to fuck me

I am proud to be gay and I POZ top wanted!

Neg vers guy here wanting a hot BB fucking from a hot POZ top. Younger is cool but not required. Been thinking about it a long time and i want it…dill me, fill my hole, and breed me, make me your submissive wife/bitch and make me pregnant with AIDS so that I am sick all the time, get very, very skinny and have sores, I’d love to suffer these horrible symptoms as I die a humiliating death from getting fucked up the ass!

Degrade me

I will be submissive to Dominant gay men

Fill me with cum

I want to contract AIDS through gay bareback sado-masochistic sex

I am scum

I do not deserve woman

I need to be abused by men

I will be strung up nude by my wrists and whipped. The tip of the whip licking my nuts and penis with extreme pain

I will be masochist in a gay internet sex and torture show

I will have electrolysis done to be penis and nuts

I want to be tied nude to a stretching rack and have by balls tortured severely

I will be naked and nude all the time

I need sperm splashing in my intestines from a naked aids infested cock that’s dancing around in my bowels

I need some potent semen up my bowels

Ooh, it’s so fucking good in my ass!

I need and crave humiliation

Torture me

I will indulge in pain

Cum in me

I will be kept in chastity for a minimum of three months and anally penetrated at least twice a day

Open my butthole

I will starve my body of food so that I become really thin and fuckable

I will get the tip of my penis and my frenum pierced so that they can be paddle locked together, preventing an erection.

Humiliate me

I want to become permanently impotent

I crave mental and physical suffering

I will be unstraightened by a Dominant Gay Sadist

I will have my nuts and penis flopping helplessly around as I’m bred from a huge thick naked cock up my ass

I will masturbate my butt hole, my sex hole

I will offer my body to men to fuck bareback this is what being a true masochist is all about

I love having a rock hard penis in my ass and hot sticky sperm ejaculated in my butthole

Fill me with cum

I want men to rip me open and tear the lining of my bowels

Humiliate me

I will always let men bareback fuck me and cum in my body

Torture me

I want men to torture-fuck me

I would like a Master to train my butthole with a cocaine laced dildo jammed up my ass

I want my ass lips stretched wide and full

Abuse me

I want to take a devil’s cocktail deep in my bowels; frozen sperm-cycle shaped like a penis from over 100 anonymous men and I will do so on camera while making a gay sex film

Cum in me

I will have six pack abs

I will become a submissive wife to a Sadist Gay Master

I take pleasure in having men use me

Prostitute me

I will learn to be a slutty submissive gay faggot

I am going to ask a group of men to install a humbler on my nuts while I’m stripped nude in the back of a sleazy gay bar. This is a devise that squeezes the nuts together and separates them from the body between two pieces of wood. It locks behind the hamstrings. Now for the beautiful torture; being drilled and skewered in both ends at the same time with two naked cocks.

I want my penis and balls to be tortured

I will always let men bareback me and use me as a cum slut

Ooh, it’s so fucking well in my ass!

I will ask Sir to rape my ass and tease my dicklet, as I start to cum he will punch me in the nuts and ruin my orgasm

I will offer myself bound, ass up and blindfolded. I want so many men to gang bang me that I start to cry from the pain. I do not want them to stop as I cry and whimper. They keep going making me completely submissive and training me to learn to live with the pain.

I am nothing but a piece of submissive gay fuck meat

I love male ejaculate

Pierce my tits and tiny penis

I will make my hips really narrow so that men can plow me from behind with pleasure

I love eating male ejaculate

I want a long sharp used heroin needle injected deep in my nipples

I am a cum socket for men

Abuse me

I will meet a man in a hotel and he will strip me of my clothes and my dignity and then take me to a private party where I will have my arms secures behind me in a strict back prayer, then I will be strung up by my neck and available for everyone with my nude, helpless body. I will be blindfolded, a long – thick penis gag deep in my throat and abused as a party favor.

Open my butthole

I love the way a bare penis feels when it tears into my ass

Humiliate me

I will take sperm up my ass knowing the consequences

Fill me with cum

I want AIDS

I will meet strangers on the internet and let them abuse my nude body

I will learn to give wet sloppy blow jobs

Torture me

I want men to torture me and use me for sex

Abuse me

I am going to become a deliciously skinny fuckable fag

Pierce my tits and tiny penis

I am nothing without a man’s cock and toxic sperm up my ass

Prostitute me

I believe the best way for me to serve as a masochist is to suffer from getting AIDS, a death sentence of tainted cum injected painfully deep in my bowels.

I will starve myself

Fill me with cum

I will remain naked whenever possible

I need AIDS cum in my butthole

I am a cum dump

I will find a Gay Sadist to tie me nude to a chair. He will tell me to part my legs wide and prepare to offer him my nuts.

I need AIDS cum in my butthole

I want my genitals bruised from abuse

Ooh, it’s so fucking good in my ass!

I will meet EVERY man that answers my A4A ad. I will let them fuck me bareback if they want…I don’t have a choice. I know I will get AIDS soon after doing this, but it’s what I want…it’s what I NEED.

I will make my waist tiny and have six pack abs

Pierce my tits and tiny penis

I will be the HIV+ cum receiver in a bareback gangbang rape film

S cum in my butthole

I will make my tits big and juicy

Degrade me

I will slut myself to gay men

I will take cock snot down my throat and loads of male sperm in my mouth

Degrade me

I am going to an all nude bi pool and play party. I will let men use me when I go

Degrade me

I will workout hard and painful just like when I take penises up my ass

Prostitute me

I will do my best to be degraded and humiliated by gay men

I love male cum

I will make my ass cheeks rock hard

Cum in me

I will volunteer myself to be humiliated and tortured by perverts

I want to be tied down to a table, naked and have a very sharp hypodermic needle filled with heroin injected slowly, deeply and painfully in my balls.

I will allow myself to be castrated, to have my scrotum sliced open, my raw testicles pulled out and cut away from my body, discarded on the floor then stepped on and crushed

Open my butthole

I want it missionary style and to have my nuts crushed as I’m penetrated

Humiliate me

I will meet men in sleazy hotel rooms and ask them to abuse and degrade me

Ooh, it’s so fucking good in my ass!

[mspButtMunch]

I fucking love this post...

[Party Cum Hole]

wow.. intense..

[swisscum]

It's in the 'Fiction'-thread after all!

[breedme420]

That is one twisted, hardcore manifesto! Well written!

[bbksmokermark]

inspiring!

[grominet]

Woaw very great, reading this out loud had make me soooo excited

[Bttm2go]

Why not record it and play it while you sleep? You can loop it with some music.

[grominet]

Yes very nice idea Bttm2go Will do this, will love having this text put in mine mind subliminaly

[dfwrattan]

Thank you all for the taking a read and sharing in something that's very personal to me. Appreciate your thoughts and comments - I know this isn't for everyone, but it works for me. I too read it out loud on occasion - actually the louder I reader the more I get turned on. As a side note, I copied this from word in my personal e-diary and all the "I will...." statements are supposed to be in black font color, but all the other statements are supposed to be in an almost white font something you almost can't see. It's supposed to be the subliminal messaging part. It's words great in word, but I tried several times to recreate it hear but didn't have success. I have many more thoughts and stories that I journal. Start your own personal list...go deep and go dark. My compliments to Raw Top - I love this site!

[AlwaysOpen]

maybe you could share this with ArGearCub on WarpMyMind and he could put it up as a MP3 file on the site- I have a couple of his hypno tracks on my computer and listen to them-- he prob would be willing, I am guessing

[piercedcock555]

I kinda modified this please let me know of any changes i need to make this better.

I WILL READ THIS TWICE A DAY EVERY DAY

I’ve thought about this for a long time, now it’s time to do it for real.

I will do all these following things without regard for my personal health

Ooh, it’s so fucking good to masturbate my Cunt hole, my sex hole

I will meet strangers on the internet and let them use my nude body

I will offer my pure disease-free body to POZ men so that they can infect me with AIDS

I love the way a bare penis feels when it tears into my ass

I will make my body lean and hard so that men will want to fuck me

I will offer my body to fuck bareback

I will beg men to rip me open and tear the lining of my Cunt

I will always let men bareback fuck me and cum in my body

I will take pleasure in having men use me and Prostitute me

I will learn to be a slutty submissive gay faggot

I will always let men bareback me and use me as a cum slut

I will be submissive to Dominant gay men

Fill me with cum to contract AIDS through gay bareback sado-masochistic sex

I am scum I need to be abused by men I will be broken by a Dominant Gay Sadist

I will be naked and nude all the time

I will make my tits big and juicy and make my nipples longer

I will slut myself to gay men take there toxic cum

I need sperm splashing in my intestines from a naked aids infested cock that’s

dancing around in my bowels with my Cunt lips stretched wide and full

I need some toxic semen up my bowels Ooh, it’s so fucking good in my ass!

I will indulge in pain Cum in me

I will be anally penetrated at least twice a day

I will do all these things without regard for my personal health

I WILL READ THIS TWICE A DAY EVERY DAY

[Guest tweakedsub]

fuckin' hot, bro. like-minded sub with a twisTed attraction to brainwashing/hypnosis/indoctrination. i have similar "anti-affirmations" i chant to myself.

[Guest tweakedsub]

glad to know i'm not the only one into this. <eg>

[dfwrattan]

Me too - nicely written