Poz guy wants to breed me but really nervous about it

[bbbtmboy]

Ok so I'm 22 have a bf he's cool we play alot with other guys and we always bareback and have a great time doing it. Recently met this poz guy around my age and he really wants to breed me and maybe poz me. I have talked to my bf bout it and he said he would support me no matter what. We both get really turned on by poz guys but I just don't know about all the health risks that come along with it and what it's gonna be like. Please help

[wood]

Ok so I'm 22 have a bf he's cool we play alot with other guys and we always bareback and have a great time doing it. Recently met this poz guy around my age and he really wants to breed me and maybe poz me. I have talked to my bf bout it and he said he would support me no matter what. We both get really turned on by poz guys but I just don't know about all the health risks that come along with it and what it's gonna be like. Please help

This is the same thing i posted on another similar topic.

Not to be a downer, but i suggest you REALLY make sure you are ready for a lifetime of doctor visits and daily meds, cause thats what HIV is, at its best, at worst you die. At 22, alot of people are pretty stupid and make dumb mistakes, I know I did. That being said I'm very glad I never made one I have to live with forever.

Also PrEP may be a good option for you. You can still have raw sex, but it will significantly reduce your chance of HIV infection.

lastly on one other note, most relationships that start at the age of 22 or so dont last, so while your current partner may want it, your next may not, or you may fall in love with a neg guy who doesnt want a relationship with you because you are poz. Think about it before you make a lifelong commitment.

[cumslut23]

There is no turning back... So if you just get the extra kick when you are already horny don't do it.... If you seriously think it's what you want and you are ready and able to deal with all the possible shit that can come with it.... Welcum!

[frost85]

The things that really keep me from being a bug chaser or really practicing bb sex are health insurance, time spent at doctors offices, future relationships and the possibility of having kids.

You're still really young to be making HUGE life changing choices based on sexual desires. You have so much left to discover about yourself. Will you have a good job that can help you afford the medication needed after your poz? What if you want children? I might be wrong but if you are poz you won't be able to have kids, unless you adopt. Even then diabetics have a hard time adopting, how much harder do you think it'll be for a poz guy?

Do you want to spend the rest of your time at a doctors office? Consistently being conscious of your health? Dealing with the side effects of the medicine? While it's not a death sentence, thanks to the miracles of science, not everyone is as fortunate. I don't mean to be a downer or offensive but I mean you're 22.

I mean ultimately it's your decision, but think about it, if you're this indecisive about it I truly don't think you want it. It might get you hot thinking about it, but you might not be willing to make the leap. I just hope you really consider the pros and cons of your decision. I hope the best for you and that you find your answer.

[TattPig]

The corollary to what cumslut23 said is: If it doesn't make you hot after you've cum, then it's just a fantasy and best left that way.

And as others have noted, it's a life-changing event. That's not a judgment call, it's just a fact--doctors, pills, side effects, costs, insurance, etc. You can certainly live with all of that; do you want to?

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

Other similar threads have suggested that if one is asking what todo here, they are not ready to become poz. Why not look into PrEP? Check with your local STD clinic.

[PhoenixGeoff]

I agree with the general theme here. If you have any doubts, then don't. Sitting in the doctor's office listening to next steps about getting blood drawn and going on meds is not the time to have regrets. Be absolutely sure you don't have them before taking this step.

I particularly endorse what TattPig said. There's absolutely nothing at all wrong with not indulging certain fantasies.

[evilqueerpig]

You didn't say whether you hook up with anonymous guys......if you do, they might not be honest about their status. Still, weigh your options before you make a definite decision.

[bbbtmboy]

Thanks for all the advice, I do hookup with random guys and do bare with them. I'm sure some guys arnt honest about there status but it's always a risk. I think it's hot even after I cum so I think it's more then just at horny thing. I'm thinking about that prEP thing, where would one get that?

[PhoenixGeoff]

Thanks for all the advice, I do hookup with random guys and do bare with them. I'm sure some guys arnt honest about there status but it's always a risk. I think it's hot even after I cum so I think it's more then just at horny thing. I'm thinking about that prEP thing, where would one get that?

Questions to consider:

1) Do you currently have good health insurance that covers both doctor's visits and prescriptions? If not, treatment becomes vastly more complicated.

2) Do you have a primary care physician that you're comfortable talking to about your sex life? If so, that would be the first person to talk to about PrEP

3) If you don't have a regular doctor or aren't comfortable talking to the one you have now, you'll need to find one (they need to monitor your bloodwork to ensure there aren't any problems with the medication you'll be on). A good place to start would be your local AIDS organization.

You should be in touch with your local AIDS organization anyways (for routine testing at least). They may have a PrEP study you can get into if you don't have insurance, and if you're barebacking with random guys and are otherwise healthy (and negative), you'd likely qualify for that sort of thing, if a study is being conducted in your area.

[totallyWild]

Random studies have been done which included testing for virus. What these tests have shown is that roughly 26% of men who have sex with men, have HIV and don't know they have it. Without meds, these men are likely walking around with a viral load, that is easily high enough to convert you. Add to that, the men who lie about their status, or who slip off the condoms, or who deliberately get you so fucked up that condom use never happens at all, or... (I have found, that the number of men who actually do this is staggering!)

Rest assured, that you are certainly already barebacking with POZ guys!

Just a Thought...

Which do you think is more dangerous; barebacking with guys who know that they are POZ and undetectable on meds, or barebacking with guys who don't know they are POZ, and who almost certainly have high viral loads?

When was your last test?

[totallyWild]

One more thought; how do you know, that the boyfriend who your barebacking with, is not already POZ? When was he last tested? If he was tested, is he telling you the truth about his test results? Do you realize just how many boyfriends lie about their status, and deliberately POZ lovers? I personally know a number of cases like this.

I am one of them. I now know, that my ex knew for three or four years while he kept fucking me bareback. We were together for sixteen years. When we separated, he kept calling me, telling me how much he still loved me and wanted to get back together. This went on for 4 1/2 years after the separation. I was wearing condoms with others, so I never worried about getting tested after he left; silly me! In the end, I started becoming really sick, but I and my doctor attributed that to clinical depression and the stresses of working in a seriously homophobic workplace, where I was being seriously harassed. At the time, I was telling my ex all this, and he still said nothing other than how much he still loved me!

I have spent most of the more than a decade since unable to maintain steady employment, always making sure I know where all of the washrooms are when I am out, as I now have had serious diarrhea the whole time, and I get very little notice (yes, I have shat my pants in public many times)...

Oh, and the most important lose to me, I have serious emotional and cognitive problems due to this disease. It is anything but this wonderful freedom that all of these stories suggest!

I hope everyone is getting the points I am making!

To the person who started this thread: Please, don't be so silly? Get tested, and if you already have HIV, take care of your health. If you are still negative, please protect yourself.

Everything in life comes with a risk, and life is about making INFORMED decisions, and weighing the risks against the benefits.