Poz "orphan"

[bearbandit]

There seems to be a fair number of guys here who know, or are fairly sure, who pozzed them. I got pozzed in 1980, before we even knew there was a virus out there. There are times when I'd really like to know who my pozdaddy is even just for the fact that I carry a bit of him with me always. In some ways I feel like an orphan not knowing who he is. I hope whoever he is that he's had the same luck as I've had and is still around, though it's statistically unlikely. Anybody else feel like this? Or am I just being really weird?

Whoever he is, he's had a bigger influence on my life than my genetic father who was a piece of shit. I changed my surname over twenty years ago as a means of "divorcing" him.

[xxww]

well im not poz but i think its hot to think about, if i was tho i would want to know too even want to fuck more so no your not weird.

[TigerMilner]

I do feel lucky that I know who pozzed me. I remember when I was first diagnosed, one of my first thoughts was that someone had lied to me. Then the case worker pointed out that it could be someone who didn't know yet. When it turned out to be exactly that situation, it made me feel better about it some how. And guys are the most infectious when first infected so it makes sense that it probably happens that way a lot.

Your post reminds me of my kids who are adopted. Both their birth mothers listed the father as "unknown". Coming from a family that goes back to the 1300s I can't imagine not knowing who is in my family tree. We didn't even know what race my daughter is until she was 11 and we did some genetic testing that showed she is half Japanese. My son is half African American so it was more obvious, but not knowing her race the first 11 years was weird. Knowing that has really boosted her self esteem and sense of who she is even though she will never know who the man who impregnated her birth mother was. But both of them have a very secure sense of who their father is and the fact that it is me is the thing I am most proud of and what makes everything I do matter. I hope in some way, you have something that parallels that sense of heritage and pride. You have helped me a great deal in the 18 months that I have been seeking poz advice and comaraderie on this site. Thank man.

Edited August 30, 2013 by TigerMilner

[Cheshire_Cub]

Yes if ever I became Poz I would want to know who was my creator etc

[evilqueerpig]

As a confirmed barebacker since my 1st man, I can't say with absolute certainty that I know who pozzed me, but there's a most likely candidate and if he's still around, I'd like to thank him!

[fuckboy20]

I took so many god damn loads when I was 22-24? I think...

 

I have no idea who the hell knocked me up. Based on the fact that most men in my area don't get tested (some) and might not even know their positive chances are it was done unknowingly. Although, I like the idea of some noble horny bastard who plowed me and left with a smile knowing he did it better. But probably not the case

 

On the other hand. I've fucked and bred quite a few guys at bath houses and bookstores and sex clubs and some poz events too. But yes, the one who pozzed me (whoever it is) did have a huge impact on my life. But more than likely he doesn't know he even has it. I've already felt like an orphan in more ways then one before so I don't quite feel that. But I do go by the notion that if someone knew who pozzed them or visa versa they might have more of a bond/responsibility towards them. Sort of how it's similar with some guys who take a guys virginity and virgins. They are sort of similar.

[Guest Natural-bttm]

Its a great way to get a refill too!  I am with the last guys listing.  I have taken so much cock from guys.  in passing on the streets they give me a smile.  I found many hot poz dudes on line that needed an ass to fuck and cum in.  Many of them came back often to add their Seed, later would say they were poz.  I was like yeah no shit, keep fucking!   So no clue who got me.  Then was date raped and remember what he looks like, no clue where from.  Hope he had a good time converting me.  all the others were on meds.  Hey its all about living your life to its fullest as we never know when the end is!  There are worst things to have!!!!

 

Fuck lots and fill many!

[tboyer]

I really don't know who converted me, because it was so long ago, but I would like to know. There were a number of guys that I liked allot who died of AIDS. I hope it was one of them. If I was neg I would just go ahead and get pozzed up, because I can't take one of the drugs in Prep anyway. It would be even better if it was a BF that did it

[pozfuck]

I have no idea who pozzed me - I was a chaser around 2000/2001 and went on a binge of getting as much seed in me as possible, not asking or knowing who was poz and who neg, but always hoping for poz. It would be nice in a way to know who my poz-daddy is, but as I don't know I'm able to have love and gratitude for everybody, known and unknown, in my wonderful poz-family. I have never been one for monogamy!!

[Bothloveraw]

I'm lucky to know who pozzed me and every day I remind him of how proud and happy I am to be his pozboy. He was diagnosed 20 years before we met, I wanted to be one with him and wasn't going to let HIV get in the way. I was never a self proclaimed bug chaser (didn't know about chasing until after I found this site) I just knew I wanted Daddy's mark, and Marked by Daddy I am. 

[Guest]

I have no idea who pozzed me, since I took loads from countless guys who had AIDS or were poz at the baths since the early 80. But I've always felt honored to take any man's poz bug - especially those who died - as a reminder of their lives and the hot fuck I enjoyed with each of them.

[halycon]

I'm not 100% sure who I got it from, I have my suspicions, one of whom is my other half who tested + soon after I did. But I guess in that case it'll be hard to figure out which way the transmission was, him to me, or vice versa

[Guest SBBOY]

I'm not sure either. Taken so many loads by so many anon fuck n go's at my place, in the bath house and fuck clubs. I can narrow it down to roughly 2011-2012 because of the fuck flu

 

There was one time where I think a guy purposely made me bleed. When I mentioned that I was bleeding he didn't even react.

[bttmsubslut]

I also don't know who pozzed me. Too many guys, too much anonymous sex. I know I was pozzed in one of two cities. That's about all I know. I'd like to know who pozzed me on some level, but it's not especially important for me to know. Sometimes not knowing makes me feel like the slut I am. 

[funpiggy]

As a chaser, I am still neg, I don't ask status, I just take loads. I do have a few Poz guys that I have yet to meet and one that is in Florida, I want him to be my Poz daddy, as does he. Once I know, I plan on getting the date, his initials and a biohazard tat on a cheek of my ass so that I will never forget. I am definitely looking forward to my Florida trip.