Top says he's neg but won't come inside

[wood]

Pulling out to cum technically is not really safer since precum contains all that is needed to pass on any diseases he may be carrying. A doctor should know that. Maybe he's lying about being a doctor.

See my post above. It is a bit safer, but how much so is hard to say. Also many people do not precum.

[Guest NxNW]

Well I'm pretty sure I got pozzed off pre-cum, so the pull-out method doesn't work much better for HIV prevention than it does for avoiding pregnancy.

If you're taking loads and just relying on the top saying he's neg, sooner or later you will get knocked up. If you're OK with that, fine. If not, either use condoms or go on PrEP.

Edited March 29, 2014 by NxNW

[Dongorongoro]

Personally, I don't like the sounds of this guy.

As wood pointed out,

It is a bit safer, but how much so is hard to say.

When considering this, I think it's important to point out that it's safer for the bottom, but it's unlikely to afford any addition safety for the top. As a doctor, he should be well aware of that. Since he claims to be STD free, his rationale doesn't make any sense-- it's not any safer for you, because the risk of spreading something you don't have is 0%. As said, it isn't any safer for him either, so even if he doesn't trust you, it's pointless to pull out before shooting.

I suppose it might be the case he's doing other guys raw too, which would justify being worried that he might get something and pass it to you, but if that's the case, he's being misleading by saying he's free of STDs-- he might have been when he got tested, but clearly any time after that but before he presented symptoms or got tested again, he wouldn't have any idea if he truly was free of any infections.

The only other alternative that I see is that he just doesn't want to do it, and is trying to come up with an excuse.

Thus, unless he's a really bad doctor with no idea of how STD transmission works, he's holding something back from you. In either case, my personal recommendation is to confront him on these matters, and if he doesn't give a satisfactory answer, get rid of him. I find it doubtful you can't find several other guys in DFW willing to pump some cum into your hole without the runaround.

[Poz1956]

I've met guys who just couldn't cum while fucking.

For example, if his J/O stroke is a very fast one, he can't achieve that same speed with hips a thrusting.

Or he needs a special little twist at the end of the stroke.

Another possibility, he likes to squeeze his dick hard just as he's cumming. It's no slight on your ass that you can't squeeze it as tight as his hand. If he did say that he needed that hard squeeze, you'd hear it as "He thinks I'm loose." So he throws the "it's safer" line as an explanation

And finally, maybe he's had an experience of thrusting so hard when cumming that he's bruised his pubic bone, or hurt a bottom. He therefore decides is safer not to do that again.

I've also heard that "ultimate intimacy" thing before

Either accept it as his personal quirt, or ask him to explain it next time Before you get your clothes off.

[bbzh]

I think at some point we all need to stop bullshitting each other with the phrase "DDF". Guys say that shit to signal to other guys that they are down with fucking raw. That's it. It has almost nothing to do with the state of one's health. Unless the guy is coming straight to your house with his test results and hasn't been having any unsafe sex within a specific window, DDF doesn't mean jack shit.

To those who want to have guilt free raw sex, it is easier for one's conscience to seek out "doctors" or other "clean-cut" looking dudes who say they are "DDF" than to fuck someone who openly says "I was taking loads last week in the park or I never wear condoms when I fuck."

Give me a poz pig on meds ANY DAY over one of these DDF guys who never see a doctor or get tested for anything.

[eulesscumwhore]

thx guys. I was wondering if there was any reasonable explanation (being safer for the top) other than he was BSing me. I don't think I'll seeing him again.

[bearbandit]

I think at some point we all need to stop bullshitting each other with the phrase "DDF".

Absolute agreement: this area is full of guys who would consider themselves DDF because their drug of choice is tobacco or alcohol, they test every year (without fail) and they're married to women - whoever heard of a woman with HIV? I've been messing around on Grindr and have been asked by a guy of 30 what's "HIV". It's the slightly more sophisticated ones who use the phrase DDF, Not realising how fucking insulting it is.

It's time for gay men to wake up to the double whammy of PrEP where it's available and TasP: with an undetectable viral load you're not going to be able to produce enough infectious cum to establish a "successful" infection, and as a bonus gift you get to maintain your health. While TasP relies on the poz guy to be fully adherent (and you to trust his words), PrEP, taken properly has exactly the same effect, it can't be said often enough that there are a whole bunch of other STI's out there and if you're getting around like I wish I was have and STI checkup every three months as a minimum.

Guys on successful therapy are probably the safest sex around

[wow4761]

This means one of two things IMO;

1. He has more hookups planned later in the day/night and doesn't want to risk not being hard/horny enough later by cumming now.

2. He is, or has a strong reason to believe, HIV+.

[eulesscumwhore]

This means one of two things IMO;

1. He has more hookups planned later in the day/night and doesn't want to risk not being hard/horny enough later by cumming now.

2. He is, or has a strong reason to believe, HIV+.

He came on my back and a lot. I think you're (2) is right. He may not be as clean as he claims.

[slowfuck]

I agree. It's risk reduction I reckon.

I used to pull out to cum when the bottom said he was negative because I knew he had a boyfriend who didn't know about his clandestine activities, and I'd been fucking other guys bare, and taking the occasional load too. I had tested neg recently but knew enough to know that the result only referred to 3 months previously with any certainty. He cares about you.