#blacklivesmatter

[RideMyBlkDik]

Racism is alive and well. If we assume that statement is true then can we also assume that we are separate but equal? Perhaps. Black Lives Matter and White Lives Matter but many people don't care about racism when it comes to interracial fucking.  If you are in a dark room bent over taking multiple cocks and loads, I don't think you are concerned about the breeder's skin color.  There is a poll in this forum titled "White Boys Riding Black Rods...Taboo or not Taboo" and many issues were raised in that thread but it seemed like we all danced around the issue of racism in that thread but never really confronted it head on!!  In that same thread, a contributor (screen name "wood") said: " there is a lil bit of latent racism in this forum about black men...".  Maybe there is some truth to the fact that racism and homophobia usually come in the same package.

 

So 2 simple questions: 1.  Do you detect latent racism in this website? (Please elaborate).  2. Do you shed your prejudices in bed but have a different reality in your public life? (Honestly).

Edited February 21, 2016 by RideMyBlkDik

[MackyJay]

I find some racism evident at times in here, but not a lot. I have never had prejudices (lucky I guess).  I have found I have only two prejudice bones in my body, LOL,  against stupidity and against incompetence, and they are the only ones.

[travelingbutthole]

In the wider world racism is undeniably in effect but as gay men we are all a minority amongst humanity as a whole.

As barebackers we could also view ourselves as a minority within a minority or even take it to another iteration if we are HIV+.

 

I don't really percieve blatant racism on this site but sex brings a lot of factors into being.

Interracial sex is definitely a fetish/fantasy for quite a few people but like all fantasies if it becomes the only thing you do it can easily become an unhealthy limitation.

 

Cards on the table time.

My favourite thing is to be fucked by an above average cock with a side order of sexual dominance and occasional light bondage.

I could easily fall into the trap of objectifying black men based upon a single body part when we all know that good sex is at least as much about skill as it is dimensions.

I could also find myself forcing somebody into a sexual identity that they aren't happy with.

For me it has either happened spontaneously when one side makes an offhand comment mid fuck or if we both talk about and agree limits before the fun starts.

 

The more I think about it the more this becomes a minefield of accidental offensiveness.

 

Fascinating topic, thanks for bringing it up.

[misterpiggy]

As barebackers we could also view ourselves as a minority within a minority or even take it to another iteration if we are HIV+.

 

I don't really percieve blatant racism on this site but sex brings a lot of factors into being.

Interracial sex is definitely a fetish/fantasy for quite a few people but like all fantasies if it becomes the only thing you do it can easily become an unhealthy limitation.

 

Cards on the table time.

My favourite thing is to be fucked by an above average cock with a side order of sexual dominance and occasional light bondage.

I could easily fall into the trap of objectifying black men based upon a single body part when we all know that good sex is at least as much about skill as it is dimensions.

 

Very interesting insight.  I am glad you chose not to objectify black men based on the size of their cocks. I would like to know your views on white guys who have no desire to breed or be  bred by black guys.

[TarzanBoy]

I see it on all the hookup sites. So many profiles say "no black". Wierd thing is interracial sex really turns me on but only with latinos. I would really like to understand the psychology behind this.

[travelingbutthole]

I can only speak for myself but if somebody excludes a social group from his/her pool of partners then they must have a reason.

Not all reasons are negative in nature though.

 

I hooked up with this one guy a while back who was of Jamaican/Brazilian descent who avoided playing with other black guys.

He was fine with all other ethnicities so I asked why and the answer made perfect sense.

He lived in Jamaica until his teens before moving to London so he experienced the homophobia that is rife in Jamaica and was therefore living semi closeted by not playing with black guys.

An extremely practical reason based upon the homophobia of others.

http://tinyurl.com/ns8fhnv

 

If its about a sexual fantasy, the skinhead idea of being taken by a supposedly str8 guy for instance, then as long as you are honest about your reasons for being selective with yourself and the other person then I see no issue.

 

If the reason is arbitrary in nature like simply not liking black guys then I would argue that something else is working beneath the surface that may need to be addressed.

That's my totally unqualified and essentially worthless point of view anyway.

 

Has anybody noticed that we have gravitated towards the black/white thing without mentioning every other ethnicity on the planet?

[travelingbutthole]

I see it on all the hookup sites. So many profiles say "no black". Wierd thing is interracial sex really turns me on but only with latinos. I would really like to understand the psychology behind this.

A good first step could be asking why you get turned on by latino men.

The theory being if you understand why you say "yes please" to latino men it may explain why others say "no thanks" to black men.

 

It could be the accent, contrast in skin tone or some general approach to having fun that works for you.

I have no personal experiences beyond a few nights with one half latino man so I'm not aware of any generic physical attributes amongst latinos so 

[PhoenixGeoff]

This is an excellent topic, with some very well thought out responses.

 

I'll start right out by saying that I have a bit of a problem with lumping sexual attraction under the "racism" umbrella.  I'm of the opinion that race should not be a factor when it comes to friendships, working relationships and that sort of thing.  But when it comes to attractiveness, we all like what we like.  In the same way that I'd much rather have a 40-something bear than a 20-something twink, there are certain races I tend to gravitate towards and others I generally don't find attractive.  That doesn't mean you don't treat everyone with respect, but at the same time, I don't owe anyone a fuck; I get to choose who I'm willing to have sex with (and vice versa...I've been shot down by plenty of guys I was really attracted to) and you don't get to second-guess my motives.

 

There are some things that I find extremely offensive.  One is guy who advertise looking for "BBC" or "thugs".  You often see something similar with Latinos ("gangbangers" or whatever).  There's a level of objectification going on there that I don't like at all.

 

I, personally, sometimes get something kind of similar because I'm a white guy who drives a tow truck for a living and am fairly masculine in my demeanor.  You get pigeonholed as "blue collar" or "redneck" or whatever, and you're expected to act in a certain way sexually.

 

But in each of these cases, I don't think it's really so much of a race thing as a socioeconomic class thing.  A lot of gay guys are quite well off, solidly in the professional classes, and seem to get a thrill of some kind from slumming a bit.  I would absolutely categorize that kind of thing as another form of class exploitation.  The general thought seems to be that the lower classes should be as invisible as possible, except when you're directly engaged in providing a service (which can include breeding your ass just as much as towing your car).  The fact that most blacks and Latinos are lower- or working class makes what is mostly, IMO, about economics into a racial thing.

[PhoenixGeoff]

I find some racism evident at times in here, but not a lot. I have never had prejudices (lucky I guess).  I have found I have only two prejudice bones in my body, LOL,  against stupidity and against incompetence, and they are the only ones.

 

I'm not accusing you in particular, but I have found that just about everyone out there has their blind spots.  There's a great deal of prejudice in America on the part of supposedly racially-blind liberals against working class white people, especially those from the south.  Mention Donald Trump in coastal circles in the US and you'll see exactly what I mean.

 

I've personally had to correct some blind spots I've had regarding Christians.  Yes, some do use their faith as an excuse to engage in prejudice, but many more, including many we'd call conservative or evangelical, really do their best to be good, charitable and loving neighbors; just because they don't buy into the whole LGBT political agenda doesn't make them monsters.

[RideMyBlkDik]

I'll start right out by saying that I have a bit of a problem with lumping sexual attraction under the "racism" umbrella.  I'm of the opinion that race should not be a factor when it comes to friendships, working relationships and that sort of thing.  But when it comes to attractiveness, we all like what we like.  In the same way that I'd much rather have a 40-something bear than a 20-something twink, there are certain races I tend to gravitate towards and others I generally don't find attractive.  That doesn't mean you don't treat everyone with respect, but at the same time, I don't owe anyone a fuck; I get to choose who I'm willing to have sex with (and vice versa...I've been shot down by plenty of guys I was really attracted to) and you don't get to second-guess my motives.

I am puzzled. Are you attracted to black guys? Or are you saying that's none of anybody's business?

And why don't I get to second-guess your motives? Unfortunately I can and I will second-guess your motives.

In certain circles white guys who don't wanna have sex with black guys are considered racists. On the other hand in our society, white guys who love to have sex with black guys are at risk of being labeled a nigger-lover.

So respectfully I ask, where do you stand?

[travelingbutthole]

I'm not accusing you in particular, but I have found that just about everyone out there has their blind spots.  There's a great deal of prejudice in America on the part of supposedly racially-blind liberals against working class white people, especially those from the south.  Mention Donald Trump in coastal circles in the US and you'll see exactly what I mean.

 

I've personally had to correct some blind spots I've had regarding Christians.  Yes, some do use their faith as an excuse to engage in prejudice, but many more, including many we'd call conservative or evangelical, really do their best to be good, charitable and loving neighbors; just because they don't buy into the whole LGBT political agenda doesn't make them monsters.

 

The religion thing is an interesting variant on the group vs individual front.

Christianity is ideologically opposed to anybody being homosexual but we need to look at the individual instead of the group.

The bible has so many crazy rules, did you know that being left handed is mentioned negatively 25 times and the King James version mentions unicorns 9 times as if they are real animals, that the ones people try to enforce says a lot about the individual.

 

Looking at a person as simply one of a group instead of an individual is the first step towards prejudice so I try to keep on top of my own perceptions.

 

Just in case people are wondering I've traveled the globe, got lost on purpose, lived amongst numerous cultures and read more theological books than than most religious people.

Thats why I'm an atheist.

[travelingbutthole]

I am puzzled. Are you attracted to black guys? Or are you saying that's none of anybody's business?

And why don't I get to second-guess your motives? Unfortunately I can and I will second-guess your motives.

In certain circles white guys who don't wanna have sex with black guys are considered racists. On the other hand in our society, white guys who love to have sex with black guys are at risk of being labeled a nigger-lover.

So respectfully I ask, where do you stand?

 

I can't speak for PG but I suspect that he is talking about being attracted to certain characteristics in a man that may occur more frequently within certain ethnicities or nationalities.

Not just physically but socially.

Dutch men tend to be taller for some curious reason, many asian societies have more rigid/respectful social structures, latin men may be more sexually demonstrative and some social groups could exhibit other desirable behaviours.

 

These factors are not dependent on biology, I've probably picked up some unusual behaviours in my travels, so shouldn't really be classified as racism.

 

Or I may be 100% wrong.

[misterpiggy]

I see it on all the hookup sites. So many profiles say "no black". Wierd thing is interracial sex really turns me on...

If a white guy doesn't want to hookup with a black guy I'm not sure if that's enough to brand the white guy a racist. But let's be clear the immediate defense of many white guys is to say that they're entitled to their"preferences"...they might even go as far as letting you know they do have black friends. That's the beginning of snide comments. Racism has many disguises.

[travelingbutthole]

Racism has many disguises.

 

A blanket dismissal of all black guys does seem like an aggressive way to communicate and could indicate a prejudice instead of a preference.

"Could" is the operative word though.

After all Freud said that "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" so whilst saying no black guys would speed up online communication it could be done in a more subtle way.

[VersatileBreeder]

Interesting thread. Here's my two cents...

RideMyBlkDik, to answer your questions- 1) do I see latent racism on this site? Not really. Do I see men who objectify black men for their generalized notability as being hung, dominant alpha male tops? Yeah I see that a bit. I also see it on hook up sites like BBRT all the time. Guys will have in their profiles things like "BBC only" or "hung black guys only," etc. Do I think they are being racist? Not really, but objectifying, perhaps. I think guys that say "no blacks" are being racist.

#2, do I shed prejudices in the bedroom but lead a different life outside of it? Nope, not at all. I love all types of guys- black, white, asian, Hispanic, etc both in and out of the bedroom. I have no prejudices or racial hang ups about anyone.

All in all, I think racism is stupid and I don't get it. Nothing pisses me off more than when I'm on social media and I see everyone sharing links for news stories to try to prove a point like "oh look at this- two black men brutally killed a white man and the media barely even reported it, but if it were the other way around, it would be national headlines." They pretend that they are shining light to social injustice but really all they are doing is pushing their own racist agenda. I think it's really dumb and especially in the gay culture, guys need to cut the racial shit. In the gay community, we have faced plenty of oppression ourselves in the past; the fact that we would turn on each other over race is completely fucking pathetic.