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What turns tops off on Grindr?


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Posted
23 hours ago, LetsPOZBreed said:

Telling me you have X number of horny guys over and that you're "looking for more".  If you have that many there and aren't doing anything; I have to wonder what you are really up to (which I know is likely drugs).

"A couple of my friends and I are sitting around looking to get fucked, you can take a turn on all of us!" No thanks. You're high and can't get your little dicks hard or you wouldn't have this problem.

Other complaints: "I WILL ask you to verify your face by Snapchat, FaceTime, etc." What that implies is:

1. I get catfished all the time
2. Because I'm not that smart
3. But also, I'm so hot that I just endlessly attract other super hot profiles

If you're telling me you don't trust me before we even talk, that's OK. I think you're stuck up. 🙂

  • Like 2
Posted


I’m a top, so I have a lot of experience with bottoms.

Generally, I’ve found Grindr tends to have the lowest quality guys on it. Not saying *all* Grindr users are low quality, but that seems to be where those types all flock for their nefarious needs... or just plain old game playing and pic collecting.

There’s not much I can say here that hasn’t already been said but I will say this- I’ve pretty much given up on Grindr because I’ve found in my experience the guys who use it as their sole app of choice tend to be lazy in bed, all around terrible fucks, or game players.

I have it stated in my profile that I don’t respond to “hey” or “sup” or profiles without pics... and yet... I still get plenty of messages saying “sup” from profiles without pics. I just block. 
 

A bottom that hits me up with pics and a clear description of what they like or are looking for will get my attention. Even if they’re not my type, I’ll respond just to show them the respect they deserve. 

 

  • Like 1
Posted

While I agree with most of the above, I’ll throw in a little caveat about no photos. Before the first lockdown last year I was messaged in the early hours by someone on a faceless profile. Supposedly one of a couple. I prevaricated, but they were just five minutes away and I’d only moved in days earlier. I took a chance and went over. They were the hottest black and white couple, both in their mid-30s and both tops. It was an incredible session. I’m well aware that it could have turned out much worse, but there it is. 

  • Like 2
Posted
2 hours ago, BlackDude said:

1. Dick Pics

2.Saying your a bottom but “your only looking for oral right now”

3. Not having a pic of your ass

I can honestly say that the second one has never been part of my vocabulary…😂

  • Like 1
Posted

A person that asks for a pic instead of saying hi I don't have a pic up but I have np giving one out just make a little convo first lol

Posted
6 hours ago, poptronic said:

Generally, I’ve found Grindr tends to have the lowest quality guys on it. Not saying *all* Grindr users are low quality, but that seems to be where those types all flock for their nefarious needs... or just plain old game playing and pic collecting.

I think it comes from the ease of making a Grindr profile and the fact that no info is required.  I've been hit up by guys on Grindr who have nothing but a screen name.  No age, distance, picture or the slightest amount of other information about themselves.  Not exactly a great way to get my attention.  I figure that they're closeted married gay guys ("discreet", as they put it) who believe that a gay man will jump anything that breathes.

  • Upvote 1
Posted (edited)
4 hours ago, dmanbb said:

A person that asks for a pic instead of saying hi I don't have a pic up but I have np giving one out just make a little convo first lol

I would never open with "Pic?", but I wouldn't start a chat with someone whose profile had no pic, and if they started a chat, I'd block or not respond. I perceive it as an information imbalance, because I have public face and body pics in my profile.

Whether to post a public pic is very much a personal choice, but not engaging without a pic also seems reasonable (and safe).

Edited by fskn
Added online safety
Posted
1 hour ago, BergenGuy said:

I figure that they're closeted married gay guys ("discreet", as they put it) who believe that a gay man will jump anything that breathes.

Don't forget the "discrete" ones! 😂 You know right away that they're intelligent.

Yesterday I saw someone who pointed out in his Grindr profile that when he taps, it's meant as a "complement".

If only more people knew that these words mean other things!

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Posted
1 hour ago, fskn said:

Don't forget the "discrete" ones! 😂 You know right away that they're intelligent.

Yesterday I saw someone who pointed out in his Grindr profile that when he taps, it's meant as a "complement".

If only more people knew that these words mean other things!

It reminds me of a press release my office got a couple of decades back, where the Louisiana Literacy Commission proudly announced a new initiative to "stamp out literacy" in Louisiana. I had to read it over the phone to the chairman of the commission three separate times before she finally understood the problem.

  • Haha 3
Posted
3 hours ago, fskn said:

Don't forget the "discrete" ones! 😂 You know right away that they're intelligent.

Yesterday I saw someone who pointed out in his Grindr profile that when he taps, it's meant as a "complement".

If only more people knew that these words mean other things!

If he sends a tap and a message, I guess he could claim it was complementary… 😂

  • Haha 1
Posted
On 9/20/2021 at 7:03 PM, dmanbb said:

A person that asks for a pic instead of saying hi I don't have a pic up but I have np giving one out just make a little convo first lol

That’s the worst of them all I think. Picture-less profile hits you up with just “pics” as their opening line. 

  • Like 3
Posted
On 9/20/2021 at 11:49 PM, fskn said:

I would never open with "Pic?", but I wouldn't start a chat with someone whose profile had no pic, and if they started a chat, I'd block or not respond. I perceive it as an information imbalance, because I have public face and body pics in my profile.

I'm glad that I'm not the only one who feels that way!  It is an imbalance.  Even more galling is when someone with no pictures asks me for MORE of mine!

  • Upvote 1
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Guest WelshBBCigarFuck
Posted

I had 3 main peeves with Grindr:

Firstly, I used to hate guys messaging for hookups with no pic and who refused to send a pic, if you are going to hook up you may as well see the face before the meet as you are will see it when you meet.

Another peeve was pushy guys or guys that wouldn’t take no for an answer. There are times you just logon to check messages, next thing someone pings up wanting to meet now and not taking the hint when you say you were just checking messages and not looking to hook up right that minute. Sometimes they’d eventually get it, sometimes they would get abusive and other times they would just get blocked.

Finally there were the stalkers. There was one guy, he had a face pic but I had no interest in meeting him as there was a vibe I would get which I didn’t like. I’d tell him flatly no, that I wouldn’t meet him. He would keep on messaging and totally disregard me saying no, so eventually I would block him. The next day he would reappear and start again, so I would block him. At one point I did a manual count on my block list and I had blocked 87 of his profiles.

I finally ditched Grindr as it was more hassle than the worth of it.

  • 7 months later...
Posted

I tried the apps like grindr as a bottom gay friend loves them. I did not like the fake and blank profiles of guys who claim to be super local but are bots/catphishers or guys looking for free amateur nude pics, the hustlers/porn guys messaging me spamming their websites or services. If I wanted to see your porn or pay to spend time with each other there are websites for this or just put it in your profile and do not spam me with links, and bottom/vers guys who assume that I can or want to immediately host or travel or go to their place with multiple top or vers top buddies to fuck them immediately, and guys who PNP who did not read when I wrote how I do not PNP or want to have sex with anyone on or who uses drugs.

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