Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

"It's not good news, honey." And then she told me. Yesterday afternoon. HIV diagnosis. I'm still trying to piece it all together. I'm not surprised. The past two years have basically been a one-man load-collecting contest, where I tried to break my own records every time I felt horny (14 loads in one night stands as the personal best). Logically and sensibly, there is nothing surprising about this. But human reactions don't always follow logic and sense. And I'm still shocked. And numb. And overwhelmed.

But not upset.

The doctor expected me to cry or whine or be upset. But it didn't happen. It hasn't happened yet. I don't know if it will. I don't know if this is a normal reaction. I've enjoyed reading these forums for a long time, and find something beautiful in the support that the poz community shows its newest members. Well...my name is Danny. I am 24 years old. And I am the newest member.

Edited by Hotload84
Posted

"But human reactions don't always follow logic and sense. And I'm still shocked. And numb. And overwhelmed. But not upset."

Sounds like you are well positioned to deal with the ramifications of seroconversion, Danny. Welcome, and best wishes.

Posted

My first thought is that your reaction has been eased by your mental acceptance that it would happen and that it's no longer the end but a new beginning in many ways you have gained from being on here and knowing how horny and helpful this community can be. Currently I suspect you will be trying to assess just how it will affect every part of your life. Hence your current numbness while you come to terms in actuality. Welcome to your new life :)

Posted

Hey Danny - I found out at 23 - except that my diagnosis was 26 years ago. Talk about scared? Back then the nurse was sure she was giving me a death sentence. But I'm still here, and I have had, and continue to have a pretty wonderful life, despite (or in the case of my sexual play life, because of) that diagnosis 26 years ago. I split my time between two careers, one more interesting and fulfilling, the other more financially rewarding. I have a partner for 22 years (and he's neg, so that myth - "seriodivergent couples can't work out" is dispelled) and we have an awesome relationship, best friends, partners, soon to be married - on the actual date of our 22nd anniversary - and we've been sexually open since the 2nd date. We enjoy our sex life together, and we're cool if the other plays on "off times" which is great since I like "scene" stuff and he does not.

There's been very little downside (other than the sheer terror at the beginning - my first partner and dozens of friends did NOT make it past 1987, but once the cocktail was formulated, those losses all but disappeared. I didn't even have to start meds until 1998, and I am consistently undetectable. My downsides are these:

1. I take 3 pills in the morning, 3 in the evening. Hell, I take more VITAMINS than that...

2. My health insurance is damn high.

3. My partner and I use a condom for fucking but for nothing else.

I know I'm lucky because I got through that time period to today where this is a manageable condition, but for someone now? Sure, its annoying at times, and you should always be aware of your health, but terror is no longer necessary. And there are certainly UPSIDES to it. When I play outside, it's always with other poz at bb get togethers, and I have an awesome time. Be at peace, watch your health, and enjoy the silver lining!

  • Upvote 1
  • 2 weeks later...
Guest BBSeroMan
Posted
"It's not good news, honey." And then she told me. Yesterday afternoon. HIV diagnosis. I'm still trying to piece it all together. I'm not surprised. The past two years have basically been a one-man load-collecting contest, where I tried to break my own records every time I felt horny (14 loads in one night stands as the personal best). Logically and sensibly, there is nothing surprising about this. But human reactions don't always follow logic and sense. And I'm still shocked. And numb. And overwhelmed.

But not upset.

The doctor expected me to cry or whine or be upset. But it didn't happen. It hasn't happened yet. I don't know if it will. I don't know if this is a normal reaction. I've enjoyed reading these forums for a long time, and find something beautiful in the support that the poz community shows its newest members. Well...my name is Danny. I am 24 years old. And I am the newest member.

Hey Dan. Welcum to the brotherhood man! Good to see you got knocked up and impreganted with the bug finally. OINK. Always up for re-charging recently pozzed holes with my strain. South of Boston Breeding PIG here.
Posted

I'm catching up with this thread a bit late, but Danny, your attitude is excellent and sane, and I suspect you are going to be just fine. I've bareback all my life, including 5 years with a poz partner, and stayed neg. I finally decided to consciously chase the bug, and when I received my results, I was surprised to find I was OK with it, rather than having regrets after the fact. I wouldn't change anything now - if I could revert to neg, I would start looking for a breeder again. Keep us posted - you'll find a lot of thoughtful, caring support here from your new brothers.

Posted

BBSeroMan, Boston boy here, definitely always lookin to get knocked up, let's set something up!

Ingulphus, dudes on here have been awesome, what a great support system! Glad to hear you'd do it all the same way even if you were neg again. So far I'm really happy with things, hope it stays that way :)

  • 5 months later...
Guest BBSeroMan
Posted

OINK. You got a real HOT cunt boy. Was glad to be the 6th pig of the day to stuff my dick in your fuckhole and unload. You were right. That was a MASSIVE load I blew in your gut. ENJOY.

Posted
Now the real fun begins.

My last HIV test was less than 6 month ago and it was still HIV-neg. Without being knowingly poz I feel free to do whatever I want and some times I go to the sauna and behave like a complete slut, without ever saying no to a load. My fun began long time ago, more than 15 years ago when I decided I was a bareback bottom and I was going to freely enjoy being a bareback bottom slut. And it's been a LOT of fun!

I have difficulty understanding why many believe one must first seroconvert before you can start having serious fun.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use, Privacy Policy, and Guidelines. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.