rawTOP
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Everything posted by rawTOP
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Going extinct? I was vers. Then I was a total top. Now I'm more of a vers top. Still sorta hate getting fucked. Enjoy topping a lot more.
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Agreed, plus drug addicts spend a lot more time having sex than sober people… But, a lot of times drug use comes from other personal issues and with things like family rejection, issues at work, etc. gay men just have a lot more personal issues than straight folk. I'm watching Dexter at the moment and I'm up to the point where he has a kid and he's burning candles at both ends and dropping a lot of balls in the process. The fact that gay guys aren't typically pulled in all directions by family obligations means we can do things that are more "indulgent" and "irresponsible" if we choose to. Drug would be part of that.
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Evading daddy fucked me bareback
rawTOP replied to gfboy1988's topic in HIV/AIDS & Sexual Health Issues
That's the thing - most poz guys don't have something that's "communicable" - so why should they tell you if you don't ask? I suspect "I'm good" meant "I'm undetectable" and October was the last time his viral load was checked. He probably didn't want to go through HIV 101 with you to explain that the safest person you can have sex with is a poz guy who's on his meds and consistently undetectable. (Actually, the 2nd safest - the safest is a neg guy on PrEP - probably). I also suspect you live in a state which mandates disclosure. Say thank you to your legislators for putting you in a position where the guy felt the need to tell something other than the full truth. -
Those aren't rosebuds. Rosebuds are when the insides of your ass "prolapse" (hang out). Rosebuds look like this... What this thread is about is just puffy ass lips, not a prolapsed hole.
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As a top I don't see swollen assholes very often, and don't really have a preference. But I get like that when I get fucked, which may sorta prove your theory of "depends on how often you get fucked". BUT, back when I was a twink I was getting fucked fairly often (though not a lot), and I got puffy back then too. Here's a pic of my ass after a photographer fucked me during a shoot for Playguy back in 1991:
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I'm just wondering why it is that some assholes get puffy and swollen when they get fucked and others stay pretty smooth. Here's an example of what I mean by puffy/swollen (click to enlarge): And here's one that looks like it's been fucked, but isn't puffy/swollen: Anyone know why some assholes get all puffy when they're fucked? Do you tops have a preference?
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OK, you guys have talked me out of giving teens under 18 limited access to the site. I still think it's a good idea - even a responsible idea - but the powers that be can be rather unreasonable when it comes to teens and their natural impulses for sex - there's no point challenging that structure. If I do anything it'll be down the road and only 18 & 19 year olds will be able to see the 16 & 17 year olds. Since most places have close-age exceptions that should be OK. But again - nothing for now.
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If you talk to some of the other "founders" of BBBH, the concept is bigger than iBi. I did what I could to include him.
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I get emails telling my my mailbox is full. They happen once it's full and someone tries to send another message.
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But all the images of the people in question will be "family friendly" / PG-13. And they won't see anything x-rated of yours. What you're talking about relates to porn. I know the UK is going through some weird shit right now with porn, but it'll pass. I mean the holes in the law are big enough to drive a bus through and the filters are blocking websites belonging to conservative MPs among others. The point is, if it's legal to have sex with the person, then certainly chatting with them and exchanging PG-13 images can't be illegal. That makes no sense.
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Can you explain what risk you're talking about? I'd limit it to ages that are above the age of consent. I don't get it. The age of consent in the UK is 16. What law could possibly broken? Can you explain further?
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But my point is that a lot of guys will lie if they are asked to tell their HIV status to a complete stranger. So maybe let those guys loosen things so it only appears to buddies, or to guys of the same HIV status, etc. Telling everyone to disclose doesn't really help if that feels threatening.
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Got a question for you guys - I want to hear the pros and cons - what pops into your head when you hear something… On BBBH.com I'm thinking of allowing guys who are under 18 to have limited access to the site if they meet the age of consent law in their area. But I'm thinking there should be a minimum age. I don't think I'd want 13 year olds from Comoros on my site. If I did it, guys under 18 would have the following limitations: They could only upload "family friendly" photos of themselves They would only be allowed to see "family friendly" photos of other members They would not see any x-rated banner ads When adults send messages to them there would be a warning that even though they may be legal to have sex with that other laws such as "endangering the welfare of a minor" and transporting minors across state lines may still apply. I'd also put in a feature which would allow users to permanently filter out people below a certain age which guys could use if they have no interest in guys 18 (or under 30 for that matter). COPPA requires parental consent for kids 12 and under to be on websites. There's no way I'd go that low, so I think the most I'd need is for the teen to agree that they won't access the site if doing so would be against the parent's wishes. The reason why I'm considering this is 1) some teens mature early. If it's legal, why not? And 2) I can actually have a safer environment for them than if they lied and said they were 18 since they won't be shown anything x-rated. Which means it's safer for the adults too. I hooked up with one kid a couple years ago who said he was 18 when he was actually 17. That's still legal in NY, but what if it weren't? Better for the adults to know the real age, right? Thoughts?
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Here are the stats so far… In the past 4 days since I put the opt-in policy in place - 957 users have opted-in for the bug chasing / gift giving areas, 827 have opted-in for groups, and 797 have opted-in for chem sex. Given that 1,758 logged-in members have been on the site in the past 24-hours (and there would be more than that in the past 4 days) - that means that less than half have chosen to see the "backroom" sort of stuff. And even among those who opt-in 17% didn't want to see chem sex stuff. So hopefully people like the site better these days now that you don't see the stuff that bothers you. This sort of strategy - showing people only the stuff they want - is really how I want to move forward with this site and with BBBH.com. I want to be all things to all people - so a vanilla site for vanilla guys and a hardcore bug chasing site for bug chasers. Any thoughts or suggestions on impact of the changes?
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You're a total cumhole but your profile says Versatile-Bottom
rawTOP replied to hungry_hole's topic in General Discussion
That's my kind of top! I hate getting fucked, but love taking loads. The quicker the better, IMHO. Thing is nearly all the vers bottoms I hookup with just go into bottom mode with me and I never see the top side. But I hope you're not saying that a real top is one who fucks and fucks and fucks. I'm not that kind of top at all. I cum relatively quickly. -
OK, I hear you guys. My plans to sort of deprecate HIV status on BBBH.com are now scrapped simply because some of you live in locations where HIV status is important to disclose. But for the people who lie when they're asked, I'll let people choose to hide their status from certain groups of people. Maybe that'll result in fewer liars.
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What does BBBH mean to you? The reason I purchased the domain was because I thought the purpose fit what BBBH is about pretty perfectly, but maybe we have different understandings of the term.
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Announcement: BBBH.com Purchased, Hookup Site Coming
rawTOP replied to rawTOP's topic in General Discussion
My boyfriend is working on it. He's a pretty excellent web designer. He's picked the font. We talked about colors today. Told him it can't be a similar color scheme to BBRT. Which means it can't have Breeding Zone or Raunchy Fuckers color scheme. He was thinking using the color scheme of an Old West saloon. I suggested thinking of a Old West ranch bunkhouse instead (more greens). Also told him to make sure if he goes brown to not have it be shit colored. So I'm expecting something dark, but rich colors - not blacks and grays. We'll see what he comes up with. GoDaddy is horrible in that what works one minute doesn't work the next minute. If you're lucky it all goes smoothly and quickly. Moniker, on the other hand, always takes the maximum legal time to transfer a domain away from them. I think they're hoping it'll expire while being transferred and you'll need to renew with them. I'm not sure who I hate more - Moniker or GoDaddy. I'm with Enom - never had any substantive issues with them. -
Good point. I don't live in a state where disclosure is required, plus I'm not poz, so I forgot about disclosure laws.
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Well, #BBBH, BBBH, BBrotherhood, BBunkhouse are all discrete enough to wear in public.
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Those of you who are saying "HIV statuses should be promiently displayed" can you please explain why you feel that way? I'd like to understand the basis of your thinking.
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I wanted to get some feedback about HIV statuses within the context of bareback hookup sites. The issue is that guys lie about their statuses because they don't want friends to see, etc. How can we get guys to be more honest? Or put another way, on a bareback hookup site in the era of so many poz guys on ARVs and PrEP available to neg guys, is HIV status even all that important? How would you guys feel about a site where you had to explicitly opt-in to see HIV status of other guys? Or what about the option to only show HIV status to guys of the same status or to guys on your buddy list? Or what about the ability to let guys set filters so they never see guys of a certain status? I'm not sure if that would encourage guys to be honest or discourage honesty… Basically, I'd love to hear your thoughts on how HIV status should be handled on bareback hookup sites.
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I got tons of emails and PMs asking me why they didn't have access to certain parts of the site. I just directed them to this thread. Since I'm tired of giving out the same answer over and over, I've modified the error messages so they tell you that the access problem is one of things: 1) your email is bouncing or 2) you need to opt-in. I'll be a little shocked if people can't figure it out now. And by the way, I'm still seeing 15% of the people who opt-in for HIV fetish stuff not opt-in for chem sex stuff (though they do opt-in for groups which has some chem sex). Then there are all the people who aren't opting into anything at all. But still quite a few have opted-in.
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When it comes to branding some things that sound good in your head don't sound so great when they roll off your tongue. So literally verbalize the idea and listen to yourself say it. Imagine saying Bareback Butt Hunt to a friend. Sounds good on paper, but I can't see using it. Bareback Brotherhood and Bareback Bunkhouse both meet the "would I mention that to a friend?" test for me. #BBBH on it's own isn't as strong as say BBRT. Your tongue sorta gets tied a bit on the 3rd B - at least mine does. And if you told a friend Bareback Bathhouse they may think it's a physical place. What I'm trying to say is that a poll won't be the only thing that determines what I use. The poll just tells me whether it meets the first test - a compelling concept. Then I have to try the concept in different setting so see if it still holds up.
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I don't think the #BBBH brand is damaged. I think if the meaning keeps being narrowed into chem sex and stealthing then it will become damaged - and neither of those things are at the core of #BBBH. Breeding is at the core. "Sketchy" doesn't scare me. Good sex is often a bit sketchy. The reason why I'm seriously considering Bareback Bunkhouse is to avoid being "confusingly similar" to iBi's site. His site is all but dead these days. Most of the time there's zero people logged in. And his Alexa score is now over 1,000,000 which indicates that very few people go to the site (and that score includes both his blog site and his bbbh site). But as long as it's up, it's a problem for me. I've come to the conclusion that iBi is not the nicest or most stable of guys. I really don't want to give him grounds to mess with me, so if that means I have to use a term other than Bareback Brotherhood, then I'll do it. Didn't want to do that, but will if I have to.
