Poz and topping with condoms

[fuckboy20]

So I've experienced this lately. When I first became poz I decided not to have sex for a while and no sex with neg guys. Although almost immediately after I did fuck a poz versatile guy. It was really fucking hot and that started me to want to start fucking bareback. I did fuck another poz versatile guy after him who took my bare cock and load no problem.

I always let someone know I'm poz if I'm meeting them and going to play with them. With tops it's mostly, "I'll fuck you bareback but if you fuck me it's condom." So I've started fucking a few guys with condoms even after or before they fucked me bareback.

It's understandable since first off it's less likely for them to get anything fucking me bareback. Second, they are MUCH MORE LIKELY to get infected if I fuck them bareback and breed them. And I don't want to fuck or breed someone who doesn't want that. But it feels very strange..especially tonight that a top fucked me bare really rough and then I try to fuck him bare and he tells me "no". And I realize after that he loves getting fucked but uses a condom..but fucks bare mostly. And then another guy I hooked up with once he asked me to rim him I told him he was going to fuck me but he had me wear a condom. He told me not to cum inside the condom while in him, I sort of did, and he checked the condom afterwards like fucking dissected it. He saw that it really was in the condom and not poppers or broken.

It's sort of common since some guys are worried about being stealthed..and there is reason they should be.

But at the same time as a barebacker it doesn't feel right if a top is fucking me bareback and then has me wear a condom. I understand him not wanting to get poz but still. A tad bit unfair or awkward. Keep in mind I don't meet everyone on BBRT and I met guys outside of online sometimes so it's not like everyone is into taking loads unfortunately...

This question might be more for poz versatile guys. Since poz tops probably fuck bareback regardless and turn down guys who don't. Is this just something that you experience when you first are freshly poz and start topping (especially if you formally bottomed). Just wondering if i should stop using condoms altogether and refuse guys who ask me to wear a condom.

[rawTOP]

I'd say refuse to use condoms. If they'll only top bareback, then be a bottom for them. But make it clear that if they want to get fucked it's gotta be raw. Then the next question is do you pull out to cum - some will ask for that. IMHO, there's no point barebacking if the guy bottoming doesn't get at least part of the load in his ass.

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

Indeed. Sort of like going to the beach and not stepping in the water.

But it really is up to you whether you are willing or not.

[GermanFucker]

First of all: Congrats on always being honest. That is by far the best policy.

As to guys fucking you bareback while insisting on condoms when bottoming: That is for you - and only for you - to decide. Some submissive guys get off on the double standard. Most guys feel akward like you. You should do what YOU feel comfortable with. If you really want to fuck the guy and that's the only way, why not? But noone has the right to dictate the way YOU want to have sex. Be open about what YOU want. You'd be surprised how many guys suddenly agree to your terms once you show them that you're willing to walk away from a fuck.

Just don't be an asshole: Don't stealth. Stick to what you agreed upon. If you agree to condoms, don't pull them off. If you agreed on bareback without seeding the ass, shoot outside. But don't agree to something you're not comfortable with in the first place.

[fuckboy20]

First of all: Congrats on always being honest. That is by far the best policy.

As to guys fucking you bareback while insisting on condoms when bottoming: That is for you - and only for you - to decide. Some submissive guys get off on the double standard. Most guys feel akward like you. You should do what YOU feel comfortable with. If you really want to fuck the guy and that's the only way, why not? But noone has the right to dictate the way YOU want to have sex. Be open about what YOU want. You'd be surprised how many guys suddenly agree to your terms once you show them that you're willing to walk away from a fuck.

Just don't be an asshole: Don't stealth. Stick to what you agreed upon. If you agree to condoms, don't pull them off. If you agreed on bareback without seeding the ass, shoot outside. But don't agree to something you're not comfortable with in the first place.

It's an interaction with someone it's not some random person at a book store and bath house. Even though their reasons might be invalid as well as their reasoning. If they choose not to take poz bare cock that is their choice. Fortunately, or maybe not fortunately I haven't gotten to the point where I fuck someone bareback and they tell me not to cum in their ass or tell me to pull out. I can see that going several ways but at the same time if they take a bare cock be it poz or neg they should realize pre-cum leaks and that not everyone control that. But I haven't experienced that yet.

That's a great point. Some do like the double standard. They aren't all bottoms verse guys are the same sometimes too. But what I don't want to do is stick my cock in and fuck them bareback without their consent. Even if they like it they might scream at the last second, "Don't cum in me" or "Why are you fucking me bareback, you're poz" or "you raped me and pozzed me". We already know some people out there are batshit or just wanna start shit. I'd rather not try to play games with someone who doesn't say, "Fuck me bareback with your poz cock." and consent. I have fucked two guys bareback and bred them at a book store and sex club before. But one guy I shoved my cock bare in his ass when he was bent over at the glory hole he said, "OH wait let me get a condom." I diddn't say anything and just walked away. But that's an anonymous thing. If you're with a guy like at his house or he's at yours it's a little harder to just walk away.

But you are right. I might just have to say, "Nope I only fuck bare and I don't pull out." And if they say, "Oh no I can do that" I can just say, "Goodbye". You are correct that it is my choice to have sex the way I want. As it's their choice to refuse or walk away it's also mine.

Trust me I'm not going to stealth. A guy I fucked with a condom last night was so paranoid and wouldn't let me cum in him even with the condom on and checked the condom to make sure it wasn't doctored. All the while I listed off the ways that guys do stealth, doctor condoms, heat and freeze them, and things they do to seed a naive bottom. Just to warn him so he can be safer if he wants.

I think I'll agree with rawtop. I think I'll just state clearly and boldly, "If I fuck you I'm not pulling out." If they say, "Well you can just put it in for a little bit." I'll repeat, "I'm not going to pull out." That way they can do their own pyscho reasoning in their minds and push it as far as they want or don't want or they can say, "Well no thanks."

Because I'm sure it will eventually happen where even if I state, "I don't pull out and I deposit my poz load." Even if they tell me to bareback them or they back up on it and take it they cannot say I raped, pozzed or violated them because I "warned them" and was serious. But if I sense someone is that bat shitty, clingy, or paranoid I'd probably not do anything with them and just zip up and walk away.

Well actually some people there might argue with that. Actually I'm curious. To those tops who are poz and fuck bottoms if you are fucking a bottom bareback and you've already stated you don't pull out and will breed and the bottom ignores you or tries to pretend they'll pull out. If you fuck them and are about to cum if they say, "Stop" or "Pull Out" if you don't pull out are you at fault or liable? That's something important I should probably know or at least decide If I'm going to bareback and top from time to time.

@rawtop

You are correct. I've started fucking to where I can cum from fucking and if they are hot enough or willing enough I can fuck them more than once and breed them more than once. But if they don't want me to cum in them than should I even fuck them to begin with. At the same times there are many guys out there and some probably with really hot asses, holes, and etc. There might be times where they might get me to agree to fucking them as long as I don't cum and I might get suckered and go along with it just because they are really fucking hot.

I diddn't realize there was so much to learn about poz and topping. Thank you everyone for the advice so far it's appreciated.

[hungry_hole]

I've started fucking to where I can cum from fucking and if they are hot enough or willing enough I can fuck them more than once and breed them more than once. But if they don't want me to cum in them than should I even fuck them to begin with. At the same times there are many guys out there and some probably with really hot asses, holes, and etc. There might be times where they might get me to agree to fucking them as long as I don't cum and I might get suckered and go along with it just because they are really fucking hot.

I diddn't realize there was so much to learn about poz and topping. Thank you everyone for the advice so far it's appreciated.

Reading fuckboy20's experience he's been having as a poz top made me think that if I were poz I would sometimes get tired of discussing HIV status or having to take my HIV status into consideration before getting involved in sex. I would like to feel free so I would most likely search for anonymous settings where I'm not forced to disclose my status.

I'm sure Fuckboy20 would enjoy going on a weekend night to a sexclub/sauna where nobody knows him or his HIV status. Walk around looking into the rooms with the doors half open, lots of hot asses and hot cocks, play with a few cocks, maybe get fucked and take a few loads and never have to talk about his HIV status, until someone brings it up but then fuckboy20 can simply walk away without responding a word. And then when fuckboy is ready to go home he can just cruise around for some hot ass, and with his hole full of cum he can unload, get up leave the room without saying a word, take a shower and go home.

If a guy does not bring up HIV status, then it can't be stealthing. Or is it?

[einathens]

from the honest, conscientious poz tops I know, I've learned that sto some neg bottoms, playing raw with a poz top is the ultimate taboo, the last line they can cross.

with those bottoms, it would seem best to make clear statements to them, and require them to do the same. tell them again that you're poz and that you do not pull out. make sure they know that yelling 'stop!' or 'pull out now!' will not work.

give them a safeword, make them repeat it before you penetrate them, and tell them that if they don't want your load, it is their responsibility to say the word and to pull off of you.

@fuckboy20: i'll take as many of your loads as you want to give me, any time you're free to give them.

i really enjoy your postings. it's great to be able to watch you growing and evolving. soon you'll have to change your name to fuckman20.

[fuckboy20]

@hungry_hole

Interesting the way you describe that in third person. You are correct in that sense. Although, I want to leave it up to the bottom to decide. But if it were my choice I'd rather just fuck and breed them. I'm already trying that make that scenario a reality just trying to actually get that going. But cumunions are popping up all over the country now. But the scenario is perfect. Just fucking, sucking, and loads being deposited or going up my ass and no mention of status or anything.

If a guy does not "ask" you your status or even bring it up then I think you are correct in that it is not stealthing. I don't think the top should have to say, "I'm Positive." If nothing is said I'm not sure if it's really two consenting adults but it is consenting to the anonymous aspect of it.

I just know it's going to happen one day even if I state how serious I am, I'll shout, "I'M GOING TO CUM" and someone will go, "Pull out no pull out stop stop". That's probably bad that typing that just made me rock hard instantly >

@einathens

Thank you. You know I'd love to but also part of being a top (which I'm not really trying to be is patience). In time I'll be able to do fun stuff like this and have some anonymous no questions asked sex with many guys. But I can't wait until it happens. I appreciate the compliment as well

[wood]

@hungry_hole

Interesting the way you describe that in third person. You are correct in that sense. Although, I want to leave it up to the bottom to decide. But if it were my choice I'd rather just fuck and breed them. I'm already trying that make that scenario a reality just trying to actually get that going. But cumunions are popping up all over the country now. But the scenario is perfect. Just fucking, sucking, and loads being deposited or going up my ass and no mention of status or anything.

If a guy does not "ask" you your status or even bring it up then I think you are correct in that it is not stealthing. I don't think the top should have to say, "I'm Positive." If nothing is said I'm not sure if it's really two consenting adults but it is consenting to the anonymous aspect of it.

I just know it's going to happen one day even if I state how serious I am, I'll shout, "I'M GOING TO CUM" and someone will go, "Pull out no pull out stop stop". That's probably bad that typing that just made me rock hard instantly >

@einathens

Thank you. You know I'd love to but also part of being a top (which I'm not really trying to be is patience). In time I'll be able to do fun stuff like this and have some anonymous no questions asked sex with many guys. But I can't wait until it happens. I appreciate the compliment as well

I think your doing the right thing here, but I would always verge on the side of caution. You need to realize that LEGALLY in many places it is up to YOU to inform the other person of your status, if you dont, you can be prosecuted, even if they dont ask you.

Dont take offense to this, but you do have an obligation now IMO as a person who is poz to act in a responsible manner in regards to sex with your partners. I know many on here think otherwise, and thats there opinion. However like I said before in many places it is a crime to not talk about your status. If you want to top there are plenty of places to find bottoms who will gladly take your nut, and there is no reason to give it to someone who doesnt want it and is trying to stay neg.

Like I said before in another thread on here I have a good friend who was likely pozzed from being stealthed, and he is still having mental health issues from that. Not everyone is okay being pozzed and while they may enjoy sex, and sometimes unprotected sex, its everyones job to respect the partners wishes. That IMO means open and honest communication.

[fuckboy20]

I think your doing the right thing here, but I would always verge on the side of caution. You need to realize that LEGALLY in many places it is up to YOU to inform the other person of your status, if you dont, you can be prosecuted, even if they dont ask you.

Dont take offense to this, but you do have an obligation now IMO as a person who is poz to act in a responsible manner in regards to sex with your partners. I know many on here think otherwise, and thats there opinion. However like I said before in many places it is a crime to not talk about your status. If you want to top there are plenty of places to find bottoms who will gladly take your nut, and there is no reason to give it to someone who doesnt want it and is trying to stay neg.

Like I said before in another thread on here I have a good friend who was likely pozzed from being stealthed, and he is still having mental health issues from that. Not everyone is okay being pozzed and while they may enjoy sex, and sometimes unprotected sex, its everyones job to respect the partners wishes. That IMO means open and honest communication.

Thank you. I really appreciate this. There was only one time the weekend after I became poz I went home with someone from a bar. Before we fucked I said I just tested poz and am waiting for the confirmatory results (truth) but probably still poz. He chose to fuck me bare. Ever other times it's been consensual with someone I know who is poz or just some random cum dump in a book store/sex club.

I'll admit as well that I'm not sure I agree with the way that works but that is what it is. You are correct in the sense that it's not really worth going after someone who isn't poz or is neg and doesn't want to fuck with a poz guy especially bareback. And yes there are places to go and drop a nut and there are websites as well. On every site I state I'm poz. I'm really glad I asked this because going to bars more often or being in places where it's not quite cut and dry who is poz or who is into BB it's important to know what my responsibilities are. And now I know.

Thank you very much hollywoodslut. Your insight was very helpful and very much appreciated. I'll probably just go after verse/top poz guys or just go elsewhere to drop a load.

[hungry_hole]

You need to realize that LEGALLY in many places it is up to YOU to inform the other person of your status, if you dont, you can be prosecuted, even if they dont ask you.

Dont take offense to this, but you do have an obligation now IMO as a person who is poz to act in a responsible manner in regards to sex with your partners. I know many on here think otherwise, and thats there opinion.

I'm sure that when the law was drafted what most likely legislators had in mind were "normal sexual encounters", where the couple will relate to each other as two human beings and would spend some time talking. I doubt anyone who participated in drafting such law had anything else in mind. Gloryholes, darkrooms, group sex in saunas is still taboo. Some people may be ready to accept same-sex relationships and sex between the couple, but the real fun stuff that goes on out there we pretend it doesn't exist.

A guy at sauna with his ass up in the air waiting for horny guys to come into his room, fuck him and let them cream his hole, no questions asked. Or, a guy in a darkroom letting guys fuck him bareback. No legislator would ever think or admit to thinking of these scenarios.

This is quite different from a situation where the bottom asks for a condom. I agree, that choice has to be respected. But in this case, not being a case of stealthing, neither the bottom or the poz top discuss HIV status or condoms in an anonymous situations. It's unreasonable to expect poz guys always disclosing their status. How about a gloryhole? The concerned guy can always avoid high-risk activities and bring up the HIV-status issue.

[BREEDmeRAW]

Some guys are strictly Condoms, others go bare.

YOU have to decide who you want to be? Do you want to be POZ, or just curious .... or realize now that it is still bad, and medical cost will rise to keep you healthy. Or you willing to go down the DEEPEST Hole and be a PROUD POZ BAREBACKER who ONLY gets Fucked RAW or nothing at all. I just say, not a match - smile - and move on. Once a guy grabs a condom I say, "No Thanks" before he opens the condom.

YES, if you are laying on a bed/mat at a bath house with your ass in the air and even face under a pillow or wear a Blind-Fold it is assumed that you are there to GET FUCKED. And if you leave out the condoms with lube.... they may ask or go ahead and use the condoms rather than discuss their own status.

In my state there is a LEGAL OBLIGATION that you must inform any person that might have possible exposure -- Sex, or even a Doctor/nurse or emergency personnel. Though they all wear gloves as guideline procedures, but they also know their exposure to many different diseases, not just AIDS.

You may want to check your own laws in your state/region.

My profiles do not just state POZ or NEG, but also NO SAFE SEX.

I want to feel that BARE Cock growing in length and Girth -- A nice Fat cock is Great, but Every Cock feels different, and i want to sample them ALL. POZ PIG looking to get LOADED and FILLED tends to tell my own interest.

You will decide over time who you Are, and what you want to be? Some people climb mountains, others Race Track Drivers, everything comes with risk. Dont be Afraid of Danger, it Exists.... it is how you handle it that matters.

[fuckboy20]

Thank you for warning me about the legal implications. I urge ANYONE who fucks bareback or with condoms with someone neg and doesn't disclose status who is poz to click this LINK!

http://www.aclu.org/files/images/asset_upload_file292_35655.pdf

The bible belt is truly fucked. I need to get the fuck out of this state. 10 years minimum if you have sex with someone and don't state your status. Only exception is if the other is informed of your status. So basically you could go home with a neg guy and you could both be drunk and horny and he could ask you to fuck him bare or not and if he doesn't ask and "YOU" don't say anything you are the one at fault. This state is so fucking ass backwards.

But thank you for letting me know of the legal matters because now that I know them I will state I DO NOT PLAY SAFE on all my profiles. Never again will I bear that horrible rubber. If someone fucks me and then says, "fuck me but use a condom." I'll just fucking walk out won't say anything.

Oh and for NY. You lucky fuckers. Just a simple misdeamenor, It's like, "Billy...even though he never asked your status you really should have let him known your status. I'm going to have to slap your wrists. Now behave you! *shakes finger*"

Bible belt: HOW DARE YOU HAVE SEX WITH SOMEONE NEG AND NOT MENTION YOUR STATUS EVEN THOUGH THEY BACKED UP ON YOUR DICK AND RODE YOU (with condom or without) MONSTER IN THE SLAMMER FOR YOU. NO HEALTH CARE, MEDS, YOU'LL ROT AND DIE

I really wish that I could find a way to have that on the "Welcome to Georgia" sign so those poor bastards travelling here know.

I want to get a shirt that says, "I'm fucking poz wanna fight about it?" That's it..that's my shirt for pride

Edited June 8, 2013 by fuckboy20