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Stupid Profile Statements


rcc226

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  • 4 months later...
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-Guys who have VGL or very good looking in their profile. Can you be any more vain or shallow?

-Bottoms who constantly ask you to “bring your top buds” as if we tops all just……randomly hang out together

-Guys who call their assess pussies or cunts. It’s such a turn off for a top. I’m not looking to fuck a female

-Guys who say “negative only” or “safe only” on bareback sites. Really? Who are you kidding?

-When you’re playing in a group at a sexclub or party and that third guy starts grabbing away at everyone uninvited. My biggest pet peeve!

-Overly verbal bottoms. Had one guy constantly screaming “fuck me papi ooh yeah” in the most annoying voice over and over. Had to tell him to stop talking

-Bottoms that don’t make any sound at all. Fucked a guy once and he never made a sound. It was incredibly boring and anticlimactic. Could’ve just jacked off.

-Bottoms who show little or no interest when being fucked. Played with a guy once who after about a minute, started browsing and texting on his cell. Really?

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I think the absolute worst is guys who completely misrepresent themselves. As much as some guys here might not like it, I have had to make it a rule that if I am meeting up with another guy (unless it's an anon encounter), we are trading pics. Doesn't necessarily have to be face pics but at least good enough pics that give me an idea of who I'm about to meet. The whole "very discreet, so no pics" thing is total bullshit.

I made the mistake once and let my guard down for a guy who claimed that he was 46, very dominant, rough, aggressive hung top and said when he came over my place he would force me on my bed face down, ass up and own my hole. Sounded to good to be true, but he wouldn't trade any pics because he's married.

He got to my place and couldn't be ANY further from what he described. WAY older than 46 for sure (I specified I was looking for a guy up to max 50), not dominant or aggressive at all. In fact, he got to my place and started commenting on the wall color of my kitchen, like he was some sort of interior decorator. He had a very soft personality. No signs of dominance or aggression in this guy at all. I told him we weren't a match and this wasn't going to happen. He asked if he could use my bathroom. I told him sure and when he came out of my bathroom, his pants were around his ankles, exposing the tiny cock he claimed was 8 inches and thick. He asked if I could at least give him some head. I told him he had to leave right now.

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Or he guys who are fifteen years older than their photos. I've always liked older men - it's the lying I can't stand. There was one guy who'd managed to get circumcised and have it heal completely. If I'd seen more recent photos I'd have been just as enthusiastic (possibly more so). And I'd far rather have a face shot: by now I know what a dick and an asshole look like!

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-Guys who have VGL or very good looking in their profile. Can you be any more vain or shallow?

-Guys who call their assess pussies or cunts. It’s such a turn off for a top. I’m not looking to fuck a female

Kind of funny that I find most tops are the ones that call asses "pussies and cunts"

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Guys who denigrate themselves in their own profile... such as "older but" or "bigger guy but losing weight" . I'm looking to fuck, and having a positive attitude about yourself goes much further. Ive hooked up with guys who aren't necessarily what im looking for but their positive attitude about themselves is a turn on. Not gonna keep a boner with a guy being a Debbie Downer in the first line I read about them. No need to judge yourself in your own profile, guys are judging you already! :) Post what you are into, and a few pics, and if a guy likes what he sees he will contact you.

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Here's a good one... When guys advertise themselves as straight. When you contact them, they insist that they are straight and never do this, but just need to get with a guy and get it out of their system... Like they just woke up that morning and some strange force that defies their "heterosexuality" just possessed them and tomorrow, they will be completely hetero again after this one time shot with a guy and they will never want to be with a dude again... Anyone ever get that? Who are these guys trying to kid? And who do they think is judging them?

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I never understand the ones that say, " First time to bottom, would really like to try this, hung guys only at least 8" " FFS, I am bottoming a long time now, and hung guys still have to dock gently.. do they have any idea being a bottom is a skill, as is being a good top. I know grant it there are some amazing bottoms, who take cherry popping very well , but they are few and far between. But damn it's a lovely thing to do :)

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