Is Bareback sex a sign of Porn addiction or being Gay?

[Guest]

I've noticed that where once I could cum from romantic sex with my wife, now I no longer am satisfied by her and seek out random submissive bareback hookups with men for satisfaction. According to one theory of porn addiction, the level of stimulation has to increase in order to achieve orgasm. For example, from big boobs, to dom/sub anal, to gay submission, to bareback breeding, to pozzing, moving from fantasy to reality. My therapist hasn't said so, but poses the question to me: Am I Gay? or Is this just a progression of my porn addiction, going from fantasy to acting out? And how would I tell the difference?

Any thoughts?

[drscorpio]

Did you have no attraction to other men in the beginning? Or were you having sex with women in an attempt to cover up same-sex attraction?

If you have always had some attraction to men, I think you probably have always been bisexual.

But I am guess your therapist asked you these questions for you to ponder in an attempt to find your own answers to achieve better self knowledge and not so you could poll a bunch of barebackers for their answers.

[slowfuck]

Ok, amateur psychology from some bloke you never met on the internet alert

Is this possibly a need to thrill-seek to compensate for a dull and boring life? Or is this a need to satisfy a desire to be a receptive partner rather than to be the penetrative one you had to be with your wife? Have you tried your wife wearing strap-on dildos and fucking you?

We're men and tend to be wired for promiscuous sexual play so you could be attracted to the fact that men can be sleazy fuckers and give you the excitement and thrills you lack elsewhere? Aside from the fact that your wife is presumably unable to satisfy your urge for loads of hot cum

I feel Gay tends to be more of a handy mnemonic for a way of being, a lifestyle shorthand, though quite broad brush with it. Does it matter that much? Gay, Bi, Straight? Can you be a straight bloke who likes to take cum up the ass? Probably though it screws with the stereotype. I reckon you may be best defining who you are comfortable being rather than seeing which label most closely fits what you like to do. If you can reconcile having a comfortable honest life with your dear wife, and enjoy whoring your ass as well, then all power to you. There are far worse things in this world...

[Rayne]

Reminds me of the time I was being the typical teenager, and many doctors kept thinking I was in need of serious psychological help. People just go through times where they need change; new forms of stimulation prevent us from becoming bored.

It sounds like you have a case of 'experimentation,' mixed with a little 'curiosity' that is causing your urges. Addiction is an overused word; and it is one that society has watered down so much, to the point professionals have lost sight of what addiction is. Addiction is like a compulsion; a never ending need for a specific desired effect that occurs in the brain after a form of stimulation. For example, cocaine stimulates certain parts of the brain; but it isn't the only thing that one can do to stimulate that part of the brain. You know how recovering addicts look for new ways to curb their addiction? It's an attempt to obtain the same stimulation with a new 'drug' per se.

What you're doing sounds more like simple experimentation. If you're addicted to anything, it's sex... or just sex that you enjoy. It sounds like you finally became bored of "normal" sex, and you found something new to enjoy. This is nothing new with adults, of either gender; and, in fact, it's only a shameful thing if the individual makes it to be. Whether you want to enjoy it, or not, this is probably your new go-to for getting your rocks off. If you don't want to continue, then find an alternative; if you want to continue, then do it. If you want to, but...... <insert regulations/circumstances here>, then talk to your therapist.

If your therapist is so adamant on you being a "porn addict," I suggest getting another professional opinion; your "progression" does not appear to look like a porn addict's progression (at least, not from your short explanation). A porn addiction would progress in quantity and extremism of content, but it wouldn't necessarily extend into your sexual activities unless it either a) replaced typical sex for you, or became necessary to enjoy sex.

Porn might inspire new activities, but so can shopping, or drinking. And, even if you indulge in the new activities for enjoyment, that doesn't make you an addict. Also, just because one professional says you have a problem, it doesn't mean you do. Get multiple professional opinions, especially when concerning your sexual activities/behaviours.

Just my 2 cents.

[bberik]

Bareback is the extreme sport of sex. Some people do bungee jumps or parachutes, drive fast cars or whatever, but we bareback.

But it has nothing to do with gay. Straight people have been barebacking since the birth of time too.

[seaguy]

Bareback porn and porn addiction are two totally seperate things. Your addicted to porn but have a preference for bareback porn. That does not mean you became addicted because you were watching bareback porn, and if you had watched condom you wouldn't have gotten addicted. A drunk is addicted to alcohol but might have a preference for Vodka but they would still be an alcoholic if they drank beer.