i've decided to become poz

[rawTOP]

problem is that my parents took me out of their insurance when i came out.

i can't afford to move out

i'm just a waiter.

i don't even have enough to go to school.

i don't get any help because my parents still mark me down as a dependent but they don't help me with anything.

i 'm not even allowed to eat at home.

i'm just lucky i don't pay rent

That's just fucked up.

But you should know that your parents cannot claim you as a dependent unless they give you more financial support than you earn on your own. Doesn't sound like that's the case. Though I'm sure the taxes are done for last year and hopefully you'll be out of their place by next April.

IMHO though, you need to concentrate on becoming independent (school can wait a couple years until you're on your feet). Becoming poz in the middle of all that drama just sounds like you're inflicting self-harm because somehow you've bought into your parents' view of you. Get away from them and never go back unless they apologize and change. Never see yourself through their eyes. Once you're independent and taking pride in who you are, then revisit the idea of becoming poz. But don't go down that path just because you have low self-esteem.

[TigerMilner]

If you still live at home with parents who are not supportive and have no insurance, how can you possibly say, "l'm ready to be pozzed". That is not judgement, that is looking at facts clearly. You are not ready to catch a cold, much less catch a life altering incurable infection. Take it easy. You are only twenty. You don't have to make these kind of decisions today. If I were you (and I was), I would focus on making myself independent of my parents first. Find a job that allows you to continue your education and make something of yourself. Be a whore on the side. Get all the sex you can, but don't let it take the focus off of making yourself the best possible version of yourself that you can be. Ask yourself, would I want to marry me? Would I want to fuck me? Would I want to live with me? Can I afford to be me? When you can answer yes to two out of four of those you can say you are ready to be pozzed, if anyone is ever ready for that. First, get insurance of some kind.

[barehole4use]

I totally agree with Rawtop & Tiger on this one, Don't jump in to that, Get your life sorted out that you are independent not only mentally but especially financially before you go down this road, Because once the deed is done at your age too - Believe me you've gone & fucked yourself in more ways then you can possibly know at the age of 20. Besides it's fun chasing it too but enjoy yourself doing that, I think one day it will happen for most guys that fuck or get fucked bare, That is just life but there is no rush when you are 20.

[cam1972]

I'll join the "choir" in saying don't jump into it. One thing that became very clear to me very quickly after becoming poz is that the stigma is not alive and well just in the straight community. It's very much alive and well in the gay community as well. I've lost too many chances with guys I liked because they couldn't deal with the thought of me being poz. Even tho I am medicated and undetectable. I've had others tell me that they thought being poz would open them up to being able to have sex with anyone with no worry. Their problem (and mine): it's hard to find people that want to have sex with them. And when they do, they want to use protection. Kind of defeats the purpose of having HIV to not have to worry. I'm with RawTop and Tiger also. It seems like you have other things that need to be put in order first before you jump into the poz pool.

[seaguy]

problem is that my parents took me out of their insurance when i came out.

i can't afford to move out

i'm just a waiter.

i don't even have enough to go to school.

i don't get any help because my parents still mark me down as a dependent but they don't help me with anything.

i 'm not even allowed to eat at home.

i'm just lucky i don't pay rent

So your parents have you by the balls because you came out and they don't like that. Hmm I wonder if they are breaking any laws or rules by taking you off their insurance? That is totally fucked up for them to do that. If I were you I would put getting out from under their roof as your first priority above getting pozzed because your independence is and freedom from their mistreatment of you because they do not like the fact that you are gay. Once your out on your own they cannot legally claim you as a dependent and then you can apply for medicaid unless your working and making enough that you can get your own coverage through Obamacare exchange.

When I first moved out on my own and thankfully my mom and dad were cool with me being gay I just didn't want to live in small hick town where my mom was moving but I was still listed on their tax returns as a dependent and that kept screwing me over when it came to getting financial aid and of course I was not getting anything from either parent. It sucked but then once I was on my own I was not a dependence and got more financial aid since it was based on my income not my parents too. Is NJ a state where they pay waiters a seperate wage that factors in tip income? Cause I thought Waiters did pretty well with tips at least the ones I know out here in Seattle do.

[seaguy]

If I were you I would call the Healthcare.gov people at 1-800-318-2596 tell them your situation and see if that is something that would then enable you to apply for medicaid. They encourage students who's can't get coverage under thier oarents for whatever reason to apply for medicaid or one of the individual plans using tax credits and since your partents pulled your coverage through no fault of your own maybe you can get an exemtion to sign up for medicaid? Never hurts to ask since your situation is unique and does seem to come up in all the Q & A's posted online.

[VersatileBreeder]

problem is that my parents took me out of their insurance when i came out.

i can't afford to move out

i'm just a waiter.

i don't even have enough to go to school.

i don't get any help because my parents still mark me down as a dependent but they don't help me with anything.

i 'm not even allowed to eat at home.

i'm just lucky i don't pay rent

It's interesting how in spite of you coming out, your parents no longer see you as good enough to be on their insurance, eat in their home or help you financially, yet you are still good enough to them to be a tax allowance. I've seen people pull some loophole shit in my days as a banker, but from a familial point of view, that's just fucked up. If I were you, I would try to put a little distance between you and them as in get out from under their roof.

If you want, PM me and let me know what area in NJ you are in. I do some real estate business on the side with my father and though most of what we do is in New York City, I do have contacts in northern and central NJ as far as real estate agents go. If you're looking for your own place, even just a cheap rental of some sort (studio, 1br, etc), I'm sure I can help you out.

Also, seaguy, to answer your question (as I have had years of experience being a waiter/bartender in NJ), the minimum wage for tipped employees here in NJ is $2.13/hour. It's total bullshit. Taxes on the tips we declare (or are supposed to declare) eat right through that $2.13, so most people who earn that wage never see a dime of it and even end up owing money to federal taxes in April every year. Depending on the restaurant a person works at, tips can range from shitty to freaking awesome. I usually pull an average of $20-25+/hour cash bartending, so it's great as a side job and can even be a liveable wage for someone who does it as their only job.

[seaguy]

It's interesting how in spite of you coming out, your parents no longer see you as good enough to be on their insurance, eat in their home or help you financially, yet you are still good enough to them to be a tax allowance. I've seen people pull some loophole shit in my days as a banker, but from a familial point of view, that's just fucked up. If I were you, I would try to put a little distance between you and them as in get out from under their roof.

If you want, PM me and let me know what area in NJ you are in. I do some real estate business on the side with my father and though most of what we do is in New York City, I do have contacts in northern and central NJ as far as real estate agents go. If you're looking for your own place, even just a cheap ental of some sort (studio, 1br, etc), I'm sure I can help you out.

Also, seaguy, to answer your question (as I have had years of experience being a waiter/bartender in NJ), the minimum wage for tipped employees here in NJ is $2.13/hour. It's total bullshit. Taxes on the tips we declare (or are supposed to declare) eat right through that $2.13, so most people who earn that wage never see a dime of it and even end up owing money to federal taxes in April every year. Depending on the restaurant a person works at, tips can range from shitty to freaking awesome. I usually pull an average of $20-25+/hour cash bartending, so it's great as a side job and can even be a liveable wage for someone who does it as their only job.

That is bullshit. Move out here to WA where the minimum wage is $9.32 an hour for all workers and in some places like here in Seattle they are raising it to $15 an hour but it is going to take years to reach that amount for some types of workers and is being challenged in court by the franchisees assoc.

[wood]

just gonna go out there and say pretty much what everyone posted in this thread is correct. HIV will only complicate your life which is already complicated. try and move out, and get PrEP.

[fskn]

I'd encourage you to get online and call Gilead right away. Gilead offers three levels of assistance for Truvada for PrEP. If you don't have insurance, Gilead will pay the full price of the drug. (For people with insurance, no application is required for reimbursement of up to $200 a month, and you can apply formally if your out-of-pocket cost is higher than that.)

If you want to apply for Medicaid, be sure that you understand the Medicaid program as implemented by your state. Is Truvada covered routinely by your state? Is there a copayment? An arbitrary cap on the number of prescriptions covered each year?

Unfortunately, Gilead's assistance programs are not available to people on any kind of government health insurance, whether Medicare, Medicaid, or VA.

As RawTop said, you will need to see a doctor's initially. See if there is a free or low-cost public or charity clinic near you.

Several tests are required every three months, but they're not particularly expensive. A well-organized health system won't require you to see a doctor after the initial visit. For example, my test results are sent to my doctor electronically, and we exchange an e-mail message ahead of each renewal.

Good luck!

[dddaviddd_pozchembttm]

I found out a little over a year ago that I was poz. I was 20 when I found out and it killed me - emotionally, that is. The first guy to reply is absolutely right - you have your whole life ahead of you. I didn't necessarily ASK to become poz but given the situations I placed myself in, it was definitely a direct result. Don't choose this, man. I didn't think about taking 3 pills a day at 22 years old, living with HIV. And some days, the emotional part really takes its toll on me. It's not fun, and granted I will the 'right guy' for me someday, but a lot of guys I meet for dating - or even sex - are so turned off by it. It hurts.