[Breeder] An Open Letter to the Hungry Bottoms of the World

[TheBreeder]

To see Breeder's original blog post click here

Dear Bottoms of the World,

You know I love you guys. I love your round butts, furry or smooth. I love the way you bend over and look back at me with an expectant look in your eyes, or lift up your legs and roll your head back while you close your eyes. The sounds you make excite me—the grunts, the moans, the little whimpers. Sometimes the outright shouts, or the animal noises you’re not even aware you’re making as I slide into you.

I love the way you guys grind and thrust and hump the bed, the way you buck and twitch and thrash as if you’re going to expire, when you shoot with my dick inside you. You guys make my life a pleasure, and for that, this top guy thanks you.

However. May I make one simple request?

If you and I are unacquainted in the flesh—that is, if we’re talking for the first time, whether in some chat room, or via instant messenger, or by email thanks to some personal ad or hookup site—may I ask that one of the first questions out of your mouth not be, “Do you know any other tops?”

I am totally aware that a lot of you guys, if not most, harbor a fantasy of multiple tops invading your hole. Perhaps you dream of a three-way with one guy banging on your back door while the other’s knocking at the front. Maybe you’ve fantasized for a long time about being the guy in the sling in one of those gang-bang videos you’ve watched, where everyone has a turn. That’s all well and good. I think sexual fantasies are healthy. Share them with your partners, absolutely. You should feel free and open with your fuckmates to be able to say whatever comes to mind.

That is, after you’ve met them in person and enjoyed each other. You see, because when we’re in the negotiation phase of things before you and I have met, and you unleash the words “Do you know any other tops,” I’m certain that what you think you’re saying is I have a fantasy of taking multiple dicks—I’m a real nasty boy at heart! But what I’m actually hearing is There’s a high probability I’m a flake whose main objective is to masturbate really quickly while I talk to you. Perhaps it’s my own deep-seated insecurities, but when you persist, I start hearing things like, Your dick isn’t enough for me or even I’m not talking to you because I find you attractive so much as I'm hot at the notion I could meet other people you know.

My suggestion is to throttle it back, tiger.

If you want to mention that you’re open to such things, in the time we’re emailing back and forth, casually mention you’re into groups. If I wanted to invite another top to share your hole for our first meeting, I’d pick up on it at that point. Otherwise, meet me first. See if we’re a good team. Then you can ask your question. It’s only polite.

Also, at that point you’ll have proved a few things to me. You’ll have shown that you show up to an appointed date—which is good to know, because I’ve been left high and dry a couple of times sitting around with a top buddy when a bottom dude I didn’t know chickened out at the last minute. You’ll have shown me that you can take an extended fucking (I hope) and that you won’t be whining for breaks in the action, when you’ve got a group of hand-dicked men all looking to poke you for relief. And finally you’ll have proven that you’re into me, and not just my little black book. Or at least you’ll have feigned it really, really well.

That’s important to me. Because arranging a meeting between you and me is tough enough, sometimes. Getting a third guy involved increases the difficulty. And more guys after that? You’re talking vanishing returns. If you really want me to arrange a three-way for you, I’m more likely to do it after you’ve proved you’re a bottom who can handle it, and for whom I want to go to a certain degree of trouble.

I’ll do it. I’m all for it. I just want to know you’re worth it.

And that’s the kind of thing I’m not likely to know when the only thing you’ve said to me so far is, “Wow dude, amazing dick.”

Until we meet,

The Breeder

More...

[rawTOP]

So true... I'm sorta tired of guys seeing me as a pimp. I mean my profile says "TOP", not versatile... Exactly why do they think I know all these tops? I hookup with bottoms, not tops.

[VersBareCub]

Hear Hear! I hate when people do this, too. Even when FBs ask it I get a little irked. You wanna take on multiples, you get the group together...but send me an invite! LOL

[TheBreeder]

You'd think they'd realize that most of the guys in my little black book are bottoms, RawTop. I mean, I know some tops, and yeah, sometimes I share bottoms with other tops, but they're in the minority. There's no secret Top's Lounge where we all hang out between fucks. (Or is there and no one clued me in?)

[BBCumPigGA]

I have a corollary to this. Tops: Stop asking bottoms if they know other bottoms or to go online and pick out other bottoms to join us so you can fuck them while I watch. This has happened with all but 1 top I've hooked up with lately, and I'm SICK of it.

[yunghungtop]

So Fucking TRUE Breeder. Well said. Well said.

As a top, this always pisses me off when Bottoms think I've got a phone book full of other tops just ready to go at a moment's notice. What would I, a top, be doing chasing after other tops for? So stupid. 95% of the guys I know are BOTTOMS because I'm a TOP.

But yeah, just like you said, after we fuck, if its good I might bring a buddy next time. Maybe. But don't start out with that.

[Belfast-Bottom]

I agree that it's rude for bottoms or Tops to be speculating on other potential guys, while negotiating with a guy who they haven't met yet. The implication is " you are tolerably attractive to fuck, but what I REALLY want is something else".

[TheBreeder]

You know, I'd be fine if a bottom guy I knew already asked if he could bring along another bottom buddy (the emphasis there is on 'I knew already'). I can't think of a single time in my fucking career that I've asked a bottom, 'Hey, you know someone else who wants a go?' I can find bottoms pretty well myself, thanks.

It's one thing to expand horizons after you get to know a guy and his appetites and you're comfortable expressing these things to each other. But like sub-cumhole said in another comment, it's easy to imply that the guy you're with isn't enough for you, no matter which position you're assuming. When that happens, it's a shame.

I have a corollary to this. Tops: Stop asking bottoms if they know other bottoms or to go online and pick out other bottoms to join us so you can fuck them while I watch. This has happened with all but 1 top I've hooked up with lately, and I'm SICK of it.

[boycunt]

On the other hand, Breeder, from my (the ultimate bottom's) perspective,. it is absolutely fantastic when the Top starts to get curious as to whether there is any limit to my capacity for taking loads. i agree that it is just rude and not good form for me to ask a date if He's got any buddies who want to join in the fun. But i'll never say no to a Top who wants to bring his buddies along. i see that not as rude or bad form, but as the ultimate compliment.

[TheBreeder]

Boycunt, I think it boils down to something like this: when a guy starts making inquiries about whether I can bring a substitute for myself, it can be interpreted as an insult, as 'you're not enough for me/you're not good enough.' For me, that'd be when a bottom asked if I knew other tops. For you, it might be when a top asked if you knew another bottom that he could fuck instead of you.

When someone wants to see you doing what you do best, however, it can be a high compliment, just like you'd be flattered if a top wanted to see if there was a limit to your ability to take dick, and suggested bringing another top buddy. Or I'd be flattered if a bottom buddy suggested bringing another bottom for me to fuck.

Guys who know each other fairly well should be able to ask each other about anything at some point, tops, bottoms, donkeys, whatever. But in the early stages of acquaintance, particularly in that time before you've even met in the flesh, some approaches can be interpreted as rude.

[seaguy]

There's an old saying "beggars can't be choosers" so I would remind a bottom of that if they were to ask me if I knew of any other tops. Cause if you peruse the craigslist m4m ads in Seattle it's all bottoms looking for a top meaning tops are in demand and can be choosey.

[boycunt]

Seaguy, You are right, "tops can be choosey." There are so few real tops, and so many needy bottoms. But i disagree that beggars can't be choosers. Just as with anything else, there is art to being a bottom. There are holes, and then there are talented holes. And i know from experience that a talented hole can be in demand too. While i personally consider every load a gift, that doesn't mean that i have to worship every cock that comes down the pike. The Breeder probably will disagree with me, but some Tops definitely are better than others, and some guys who consider themselves tops, frankly, are not worth the effort it takes for my ass to work a load out of them

[TheBreeder]

I don't disagree with you at all, Boycunt. A lot of tops are flakes, two-minute men, and guys who would be better off fucking their hands than wasting the time of a well-intentioned bottom. Many of us are definitely better than others. (You'll notice with which category I like to side my reputation.)

The Breeder probably will disagree with me, but some Tops definitely are better than others, and some guys who consider themselves tops, frankly, are not worth the effort it takes for my ass to work a load out of them

[evilqueerpig]

If I'm ever fortunate to meet you, my primary focus will be you...your cock, your seed, your pleasure, your needs and desires. My ass will be there to take care of those things, my hands and mouth will enhance the experience and my legs will wrap around your waist to pull you deep into me. Unless a 3way or groupscene is prearranged, there are no other options. Even as a PIG, I do adhere to my own code of ethics.

[TheBreeder]

Evilqueer,

You are my type of pig. I like what you have to say, my friend!