Whoring out my bf and regrets

[AsianPOZchaser]

So, i recently whored my new bf.

It might seem weird but when i top, i am the one in charge taking care of him.

After several weeks of dating, i knew his birthday was near.

I asked him what he wanted, and he replied he wanted blindfold anon hookup

He said he wanted so bad, but did not have the gut to do so.

Although i have whored out some of my fuck buddies but never have i done such a thing to mine.

Long story short, i made a bbrt profile for him, and uploaded pictures and used some other apps for arrangement.

I thought it would be fun like previous parties.

But, it felt terrible, after that i feel awkward when seeing him.

I tried to stay calm, but i think he sensed the vibe between us.

Guess i messed up this relationship.

 

 

Edited May 1, 2020 by AsianBarebackSlut

[Twochipigs]

What felt terrible about this?  Why do you feel awkward?

[sleazysub]

Hey, i can feel the trauma in the post.

My take, ignore any pressure of how a relationship should be.  Follow your's and his urges.  Why are you judging him.  You liked it at the time?  Life is way too short for regrets, be happy and most of all, be you.

[boy4you]

Please don’t feel bad as my BF whored me out a few times and I whored out my own blood brother. 

[kinkysuBB]

Have you talked about it since? Is he less experienced than you? I’ve had this experience with fuck buddies where they sometimes aren’t ready for their fantasy and regret it afterwards.

If you like him and want the relationship to continue, talk about it and see how you might work things out. He clearly has a piggy mind, but you might need to take things a bit more slowly with him.

[ErosWired]

You say “it felt terrible”, but its unclear if you mean it felt terrible for you, your boyfriend, or both of you, and why. Without that information, it’s somewhat difficult to give you useful counsel specific to your situation. I might offer a couple of observations, though.

First, communication is essential in every sound relationship, and it should never be allowed to break down. If you feel awkward in talking to him now, it’s a fairly sure sign that it’s now a necessity, and plain honesty is probably your best bet. You might simply start off with “I feel awkward talking to you about this, but I’ve been feeling <what you’re feeling> about what we did for your birthday and I wondered if you would be okay to talk about it.” Or something like that. If you’re absolutely certain it was a disaster for him, you might think about what you could do to make it up to him by way of apology - if that’s the case. If he loved it but you hated that you did it to him, communicating your feelings is still just as important, so that you both can judge the nature of one another’s attraction and level of commitment and trust.

Second, if the whoring ended up being a different experience than he had fantasized when he asked you for it, that isn’t necessarily your fault. Mention whoring out a bottom on these boards and an immediate chorus of “Take me! Whore me out! That’s my biggest fantasy!” starts in from all directions. Yet there’s a yawning chasm between the fantasy and the reality when it comes to a bottom being able to take the sustained serial use from strangers that whoring requires. I’m sure you know what I mean if you’ve whored out several bottoms. Bottoms who have actually experienced being whored seem to fall into one of two groupings: The first are those, like myself, who are experienced enough to handle it, or been trained for it, for whom the reality is not a problem. The second are those who have tried it and either bailed out early in the proceedings or swear they’ll never ever do it again. The great majority of bottoms, I believe, would fall into the latter group were their fantasies ever made flesh. As we don’t know from your account how your boyfriend fared or reacted to the experience, we can’t speculate on whether he is of the first or second type, but regardless, he received what he requested, and what by all accounts every bottom thinks he greatly desires.

If his fantasy butted heads with his reality, this is an opportunity for the two of you to talk it out and get to know one another on a more intimate basis.

Best of luck to you both.

[AsianPOZchaser]

17 hours ago, Twochipigs said:

What felt terrible about this?  Why do you feel awkward?

Seeing him gap was not a turn on for me. But, he was pleased, and willing to try once more. 

I lied to him in the first place that i am cool with open relationship

when seeing him, it reminds me of his gaping hole. 

I am quite dominative by the way. And that is killing me 

[AsianPOZchaser]

16 hours ago, boy4you said:

Please don’t feel bad as my BF whored me out a few times and I whored out my own blood brother. 

Fucking hot, one of my fantasy is breeding brothers at the same time. Guess your bf would be achieving my dream 

[Guest CuriousDallas]

4 hours ago, AsianBarebackSlut said:

Seeing him gap was not a turn on for me. But, he was pleased, and willing to try once more. 

I lied to him in the first place that i am cool with open relationship

when seeing him, it reminds me of his gaping hole. 

I am quite dominative by the way. And that is killing me 

That’s the thing with a relationship...feelings develop as emotional bonds increase. It’s very difficult to do the “no strings anon” thing as you get into a relationship, as your feelings will get hurt. I’d been kind of dating Jesse, a guy back in Dallas, and we’d been no strings fuck buds before that. But we knew that going into the relationship. It was baked into the equation. I knew he was still gonna get with a lot of other guys and he knew that about me. And while I wanted to get more serious I knew that would be tricky because we’d never be exclusive with each other. And that’s why I really don’t date or get into an exclusive relationship...I know who and what I am and I can’t be exclusive. I’ve had a lot of guys who want to date me and I have to explain the reality. Most say they can handle it but I know the truth is they can’t. They’ll lose it the first time they go to fuck me and I’ve already got someone else’s load in my ass. They’ll get pissed they can’t see me because I have other plans and those plans involve me getting with other guys. They’ll get pissed because I’m taking anon loads bare, because I’m hooking up with guys I don’t know, putting myself in danger, and on and on. They’ll want me to change and be some boring vanilla version of myself. Well...check back in ten years when I might feel different. Right now I want sex. That’s probably what your BF wants too. But you want that but also commitment. Therein lies the problem

[PhoenixTriad]

Quote

I lied to him in the first place that i am cool with open relationship

Here is the root of the problem.

[ErosWired]

3 hours ago, PhoenixTriad said:

Here is the root of the problem.

Indeed. A relationship that endures cannot be built upon a lie. This lie is particularly problematic, because to overcome the underlying truth, one of you would have to be willing to give up something so important that it would not be reasonable to ask of someone so early on.

Your response suggests that you would tend to be a possessive and perhaps controlling partner. Better to look for someone solely interested in monogamy.

[bareback-flipflop]

If I will have a relationship again, it must be open. Being a bareback whore is the point of my life. I hope, my future boyfriend will force me to have sex with others. 

[ScorpionFF]

16 hours ago, AsianBarebackSlut said:

I lied to him in the first place that i am cool with open relationship

As others have touched upon already, this is a problem. 

Any kind of relationship, whether it be sexual, friend, family, romantic, whatever the scenario has to be based upon trust.

From my life experience (and I am an old codger, ha) it really is the best thing to do to always tell the truth, and not be afraid to have open and frank discussions with others. In this situation you would definitely benefit greatly by really talking openly. Either it will all fall apart, or, you will as a couple grow stronger together. 

It is not healthy for body nor mind to keep stuff bottled up. Good luck buddy. 😊

[evilalex]

11 hours ago, CuriousDallas said:

That’s the thing with a relationship...feelings develop as emotional bonds increase. It’s very difficult to do the “no strings anon” thing as you get into a relationship, as your feelings will get hurt. I’d been kind of dating Jesse, a guy back in Dallas, and we’d been no strings fuck buds before that. But we knew that going into the relationship. It was baked into the equation. I knew he was still gonna get with a lot of other guys and he knew that about me. And while I wanted to get more serious I knew that would be tricky because we’d never be exclusive with each other. And that’s why I really don’t date or get into an exclusive relationship...I know who and what I am and I can’t be exclusive. I’ve had a lot of guys who want to date me and I have to explain the reality. Most say they can handle it but I know the truth is they can’t. They’ll lose it the first time they go to fuck me and I’ve already got someone else’s load in my ass. They’ll get pissed they can’t see me because I have other plans and those plans involve me getting with other guys. They’ll get pissed because I’m taking anon loads bare, because I’m hooking up with guys I don’t know, putting myself in danger, and on and on. They’ll want me to change and be some boring vanilla version of myself. Well...check back in ten years when I might feel different. Right now I want sex. That’s probably what your BF wants too. But you want that but also commitment. Therein lies the problem

You can bring me loads in your ass any time. 

[NastyRigPig]

It isn’t too late to let him know your lie, what made you uncomfortable and formulate a pathway forward.  If he’s a good guy and someone you can see being with long term, it would be worthwhile.

I’m a proponent of open relationships, with one caveat:  The relationship needs a certain level of stability and a lot of communication.  My experiences and those of some of my friends is they opened up the relationship before everyone was secure with the core relationship.   As for the gaping, you know that’ll be okay, and I would have been hard pressed not to rim that gash for hours afterwards.