Vent about STI's

[tallslenderguy]

i have a sweet friend on this site who just went through a ridiculous issue with a  long time friend he hooked with.  Both of these guys have hook up sex with other guys, yet one of them is pissed because he thinks the other one lied about being on herpes meds.  The guy told him about 6 times he had herpes, also told him that he had been with two other guys and hadn't been tested since.  

To my way of thinking, the guy who told him he had herpes (many times) and sex with other guys, went way overboard with disclosure, but hey, he's a sweet, caring guy, who i think takes way more on himself to 'protect' those he hooks with.  my feel is, if you are having hook up sex, and you're an adult, you take full responsibility for your self.  Especially when both parties are up front about having hook up sex with other guys?  

Seriously, the ignorance and immaturity it takes to try and guilt or shame someone because of after sex fear of STI's just blows me away. It's 2020, everyone has google, there is no excuse for this kind of ignorance?!?   It took me 10 seconds to do a search on HSV meds, they only reduce the risk of transmission by 50% with those who have known infection. One can be contagious and asymptomatic.

i could go on, but to what end? To me, if you are an adult and having hook up sex, you and you alone are responsible for any disease you may catch.  i am just floored at the number of guys who still think that since they asked "are you clean" that's valid STI protection, or worse, the guys claiming in their hook up site profile "D&D free, ub2."  

sigh. 

sorry, end of rant

[BootmanLA]

24 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

sorry, end of rant

Don't be sorry. I tend to rant a bit myself, now and then. And you're right: in this day and age, there's no excuse for being ill-informed about STI's. Maybe in some benighted portion of Appalachia where all internet is still dial-up and there's no cell service that can deliver even basic internet, but not in most of the country. Certainly not in any metropolitan area.

And I live in a red state where realistic sex ed is pretty much forbidden, period. 

[kinkysuBB]

If you’re having bareback hook up sex, you accept that you will get STIs. Not might: will. End of.

[drscorpio]

People are so fucking weird about herpes. It’s absolutely endemic in the US. Most of us are exposed in grammar school when we don’t have any sense of personal boundaries. People will misinterpret their first outbreak as their first exposure. When I had my first cold sore on my lip (that I had any recollection of), my husband and I had been monogamous for 4-5 years; I was just super stressed out. 
 

I know there are two kinds, but the point stands. You didn’t necessarily react the first time you were exposed. The guy who triggered your outbreak isn’t necessarily the one who infected you.