Anyone else notice a big uptick in racist and misogynist rhetoric in cruising?

[Fitanoncumswallow]

I've always seen it. When I visited Houston last weekend I noticed it a lot more compared to where I live, but like I said it's something I've always seen. Being black maybe this is something I'm used to seeing since there's tons of people who fetishize me based on my race. It is what it is.

[Teodoros]

I'm from a country where almost everyone is Indigenous and basically the same race. Honestly, It do has regional prejudice here—like, people sometimes look down on others from different parts of the country. But when it comes to racial discrimination… I don’t really get it. I mean, I’ve never really experienced it myself. Actually, on a personal level, I’m kinda attracted to people from different races—you could even say I have a thing for exotic looks or just people who aren’t the same race as me. Is that still considered racism?

Edited September 18, 2025 by Teodoros

[will_zeis23]

On 9/17/2025 at 2:19 PM, tr4veler said:

oh trust me, as a fat guy, I get that too.  It sucks, and is pervasive, but seems distinct from the other stuff.

Yeah I mean its an automatic ghosting despite knowing there's noting wrong with my chubby body or dick. But whatever. 

[topblkmale]

On 9/16/2025 at 12:10 PM, tr4veler said:

I mostly use sniffies, and I don't know if it's just a vibe or actually an increase, but I feel like since January I've been noticing more and more guys stating preferences that are very racialized and others that are very misogynistic. Things I've noticed:

- a lot more guys explicitly stating racial preferences for partners, in all directions (e.g. no whites, no blacks, but also parties that are black tops/white bottoms only, white bottoms who express a preference for black tops, etc. etc .) or who state their own race in their posts, as though it's part of their own sexual identity (e.g. come fuck my white/asian/latin ass)

- a lot more guys who equate submissive with feminine and female.  Lots more "turn me into your little fem sissy bitch" or the like.  

I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum, but I do feel like there's a trend here that goes along more broadly with the rise of hate and categorizing people by race, gender, etc ., in the country, and that the pushback I used to see in gay spaces around racial preferences seems to have evaporated, at least in the spaces I've been looking at.

Is this just me? I'm finding this depressing and want to see if it's a bigger trend.

 

I'm appending no nail polish to my sniffies and Grindr profile.

 

[stillbreedin]

i have not as of yet; however with the increase in hate of all kinds up from the sewers, i am not surprised to hear this.

[allrise]

I have lived in different countries and note there are always some racism everywhere, even minority groups can be racist.
I have not seen an increase in the LGBT+ community - there are always people who like certain types, I don’t identify this as racism.

Agree with stillbreedin, there is an increase in intolerance and hate.

[BXBjBtm]

As I gay man I find discrimination everyday & I live in NY. (Perfect example yesterday I'm in Financial Dist. & a car with 3 black guys me. One starts yelling out the window "It's a real life faggot walking down the street. A real fucking faggot in the flesh. Fucking faggot." So loud most people on the street turned to look at me. So black, gay, purple, fat anything certain people can use who are just morons, I guess they will. And funniest part i grew in a predominantly black part of Brooklyn, with many black friends & mostly have dated black men. But i find it's very common for straight black men to be the 1st one to use the word faggot. Im not sure in my life time it will change (I always hoped it would) but at end of the day were all human, we all bleed & we all have feelings. So for the ones of us who aren't closed mind continue to respect each other, it's all we can do!!

[callmesluticus]

On 9/16/2025 at 11:10 AM, tr4veler said:

I mostly use sniffies, and I don't know if it's just a vibe or actually an increase, but I feel like since January I've been noticing more and more guys stating preferences that are very racialized and others that are very misogynistic. Things I've noticed:

- a lot more guys explicitly stating racial preferences for partners, in all directions (e.g. no whites, no blacks, but also parties that are black tops/white bottoms only, white bottoms who express a preference for black tops, etc. etc .) or who state their own race in their posts, as though it's part of their own sexual identity (e.g. come fuck my white/asian/latin ass)

- a lot more guys who equate submissive with feminine and female.  Lots more "turn me into your little fem sissy bitch" or the like.  

I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum, but I do feel like there's a trend here that goes along more broadly with the rise of hate and categorizing people by race, gender, etc ., in the country, and that the pushback I used to see in gay spaces around racial preferences seems to have evaporated, at least in the spaces I've been looking at.

Is this just me? I'm finding this depressing and want to see if it's a bigger trend.

Nah. Just older dudes, born before 1990 who got spanked and told no are now out more than ever.  We use fag to describe or call someone a lame. Sexualky speaking ppl like me bc being a sub fag is so hot, we use it to sell identify sexually like the weirdos do with pronouns. We're not gonna force it on anyone unlike the weirdos but we are also not required to care about your feelers either. 

 

See the world started long before all you sensitive folk were born. You being coddled doesnt mean when youre grown and on your own that society has to coddle you. 

 

I wont get into it more than that, I can im just trying to be nicer even just for myself these days. 

[Close2MyBro]

On 9/16/2025 at 9:10 AM, tr4veler said:

I mostly use sniffies, and I don't know if it's just a vibe or actually an increase, but I feel like since January I've been noticing more and more guys stating preferences that are very racialized and others that are very misogynistic. Things I've noticed:

- a lot more guys explicitly stating racial preferences for partners, in all directions (e.g. no whites, no blacks, but also parties that are black tops/white bottoms only, white bottoms who express a preference for black tops, etc. etc .) or who state their own race in their posts, as though it's part of their own sexual identity (e.g. come fuck my white/asian/latin ass)

- a lot more guys who equate submissive with feminine and female.  Lots more "turn me into your little fem sissy bitch" or the like.  

I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum, but I do feel like there's a trend here that goes along more broadly with the rise of hate and categorizing people by race, gender, etc ., in the country, and that the pushback I used to see in gay spaces around racial preferences seems to have evaporated, at least in the spaces I've been looking at.

Is this just me? I'm finding this depressing and want to see if it's a bigger trend.

I think it's your perception. If you want to look at a person's expression of their preferences as "racist" or "misogynistic" then you're going to see them that way. I look at them as an expression of their preferences. I don't have to agree with them, but they have the right to like what they like. There are also a lot of people who enjoy power imbalance in sexual relationships, I don't see a problem with that either. 

[topblkmale]

On 9/16/2025 at 12:10 PM, tr4veler said:

I mostly use sniffies, and I don't know if it's just a vibe or actually an increase, but I feel like since January I've been noticing more and more guys stating preferences that are very racialized and others that are very misogynistic. Things I've noticed:

- a lot more guys explicitly stating racial preferences for partners, in all directions (e.g. no whites, no blacks, but also parties that are black tops/white bottoms only, white bottoms who express a preference for black tops, etc. etc .) or who state their own race in their posts, as though it's part of their own sexual identity (e.g. come fuck my white/asian/latin ass)

- a lot more guys who equate submissive with feminine and female.  Lots more "turn me into your little fem sissy bitch" or the like.  

I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum, but I do feel like there's a trend here that goes along more broadly with the rise of hate and categorizing people by race, gender, etc ., in the country, and that the pushback I used to see in gay spaces around racial preferences seems to have evaporated, at least in the spaces I've been looking at.

Is this just me? I'm finding this depressing and want to see if it's a bigger trend.

 

That's not happening on Grindr.

I know for a fact that if you state a racial or gender preference (in a negative statement e.g. no whites, no blacks, no trans, no women)  in your Grindr profile that your account will be reported and banned due to Violation of Community Guidelines as hate speech or bullying.

Its also one reason why they removed the race filter. The other is to increase site engagement.

 

[ellentonboy]

I have not noticed it much.  If you have body or face pics posted, or even in your narrative, most guys know your race.

I have to think back to the days of AOL, where I used to see "No fats, fems, blacks" etc, and it was fairly common.  But since that time I don't think see it as often. I understand people may have a "preference" when it comes to race, but there is a nice way to go about that without saying something ugly.  If you're not interested, you just move along.

 

[topblkmale]

On 9/16/2025 at 12:10 PM, tr4veler said:

I mostly use sniffies, and I don't know if it's just a vibe or actually an increase, but I feel like since January I've been noticing more and more guys stating preferences that are very racialized and others that are very misogynistic. Things I've noticed:

- a lot more guys explicitly stating racial preferences for partners, in all directions (e.g. no whites, no blacks, but also parties that are black tops/white bottoms only, white bottoms who express a preference for black tops, etc. etc .) or who state their own race in their posts, as though it's part of their own sexual identity (e.g. come fuck my white/asian/latin ass)

- a lot more guys who equate submissive with feminine and female.  Lots more "turn me into your little fem sissy bitch" or the like.  

I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum, but I do feel like there's a trend here that goes along more broadly with the rise of hate and categorizing people by race, gender, etc ., in the country, and that the pushback I used to see in gay spaces around racial preferences seems to have evaporated, at least in the spaces I've been looking at.

Is this just me? I'm finding this depressing and want to see if it's a bigger trend.

 

So posting 'breeding all white twink fem-boy bitches' is hate speech now?

 

(Please don't flood my inbox)

 

[Pozguyinchi]

On 9/16/2025 at 11:10 AM, tr4veler said:

I mostly use sniffies, and I don't know if it's just a vibe or actually an increase, but I feel like since January I've been noticing more and more guys stating preferences that are very racialized and others that are very misogynistic. Things I've noticed:

- a lot more guys explicitly stating racial preferences for partners, in all directions (e.g. no whites, no blacks, but also parties that are black tops/white bottoms only, white bottoms who express a preference for black tops, etc. etc .) or who state their own race in their posts, as though it's part of their own sexual identity (e.g. come fuck my white/asian/latin ass)

- a lot more guys who equate submissive with feminine and female.  Lots more "turn me into your little fem sissy bitch" or the like.  

I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum, but I do feel like there's a trend here that goes along more broadly with the rise of hate and categorizing people by race, gender, etc ., in the country, and that the pushback I used to see in gay spaces around racial preferences seems to have evaporated, at least in the spaces I've been looking at.

Is this just me? I'm finding this depressing and want to see if it's a bigger trend.

I am a white middle aged male. I would never claim to have the same experience as anyone else. Especially Someone of color. I really don’t have a preference. My pussy doesn’t see color. What turns me on varies. I do see a lot of guys that I reach out to just delete the conversation or never respond back. I am sure it’s probably that I’m not their type or they don’t want a Poz guy etc. I don’t take offense at it but I would rather you just say…. Not my type or not interested. Much better than putting those specifics in the profile page. I would not be offended. I do ok. lol. I am not fragile. 

[onlyraw]

Hi - not sure if this is the right place …. But as this is talking about the state of cruising theses days…..

After a very long absence… I am dipping my toe back in the cruising world (although I know it is a limited market for daddies of my senior years in the Boston area)

but occasionally I do get hit up …. And while part of me feels grateful.… sometimes the guy is just not my type 

I hate ghosting the guy …. I’ve had that happen to me a lot and it doesn’t help my ego at all  (although if all they say is “hi” or “sup?” I will sometimes just not reply)

but — have any of gotten a “thanks but no thanks” that didn’t make you feel crappy?

or do you have a phase you use yourself that you think works.

[PozBearWI]

Yes, I do see that uptick.  The whole focus on BBC, or Hispanic cock, etc.  I've enjoyed men of all stripes and honestly, it's the man not his race that make a difference.