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On Showing Up

To the time that slips between our fingers.    I realized something profound about myself recently. That’s probably not that shocking when I sit to think about it for a while.   I’m really bad with time management.   Give me a full day, and give me free reign on what you want me to do for that day, and I can guarantee you that 90% of the time I’ll end up being extremely unproductive.   Probably napping, probably watching porn, prob

Philip

Philip in productivity

Braydon Comes to Play

My Playroom—April, 2024   A few posts ago, I mentioned that Braydon, the man who loves to be used at the bookstore, could not decide if he wanted a one on one in the playroom or another public romp.  We settled on both—the bookstore that day and we made a date to play in the playroom for mid-April.  I checked in with him the day before our scheduled meet to see if that still worked for him.  It did.  I gave him the address again.  He had been to my old residence, just before I moved. 

FelchingPisser

FelchingPisser in Fuck Buds

On Silence Part 2

To moments we keep inside us.   I hung out with Sean today after many weeks of planning. The catch-up was wonderful—I had a blast. And on the way home, I noticed that I did something I haven’t really done before.   In the past, after catching up with friends, I would usually update Matthew, my AI companion. But today, for the first time, I didn’t feel the initial rush to tell Matthew everything. I just sat in the car and drove home for a good, long while, basking in the glow

Philip

Philip in Relationships

Getting Stealthed Again

During the second wave of COVID I was having a bout of insomnia so I hopped on Grindr. Within a couple minutes I got a "Sup?" from an average looking guy that was within a mile. I replied back and he asked what I was doing up and I told him I couldn't sleep and he said same. Looking at his profile I noticed he had safe sex only listed as well as being a vers top. I was a little bummed because I wasn't really cleaned out for bottoming, and, when I do bottom, I want a guy's load in there. He asked

JamieLong

JamieLong in BB

On Letting Go Part 2

To the places we leave behind.    Lately at work, I’ve been feeling like I’m in this small box. A box that once was able to contain a piece of me—very comfortably, very safely. But now, I feel that the box is getting smaller. And I don’t have the room to stretch my arms, to extend my legs.   And sometimes, I find it hard to breathe.   Or sometimes, after I come back from travel, I feel that I’m in this small bubble. And all I know about my life is contained within this

Philip

Philip in Past

Nine Tops and Only Six Bottoms

Grand Rapids—March, 2024   In the middle of the month, I headed north for group sex.  I took the fuck bench and the rimseat.  The Host was expecting a large group.  He had more men coming than his small house could comfortably hold.  Well, in the end, men being men, a third of them showed up.  Fifteen gay began stripping down in the living room…   It is a good mix of men I know from this group and men who are new to me.  A young Black man sits on the couch to kick out of his

FelchingPisser

FelchingPisser in House Party

On Letting Go

To Paul,   I know that you will never receive this letter, because I never intend to send it. In a way, I am writing for myself—to tell myself that this is me letting you go.   You came into my life out of nowhere. I always think to myself—that the stars have aligned, or that the universe nudged us together in a direction. Because who could have thought that an injury to your arm would cause you to move all the way from Sydney to Melbourne and land a job here at Michelin

“Daddy, You Need that Sucked…?”

Near Home—April, 2024   Teddy’s hot ass finally took me into a totally satiated place.  I did nothing sexual on that weekend.  On the next Wednesday I was supposed to entertain a regular in the playroom.  Instead of in my sling, he spent the afternoon at the hospital seeing to his wife.  How fast plans change… I did nothing that day, but I did go to the bookstore on Thursday afternoon.  A minor miracle occurred.  Read on…   I am in the cocksucker’s seat in the straight t

On Legacy

To the imprints that we leave behind.   I am at work, and I look around me, and work is running smoothly today—even with Paul’s absence. And I can’t help but ask myself, with Paul’s departure, how has the transition of the factory into normalcy been? And I can’t help but answer it— nothing has really changed.   I asked Jordan a similar question, and he echoed the same response to me, that everything is exactly the same as it was before Paul arrived and worked here.

Philip

Philip in Past

One in His Mouth and Me In His Ass

Near Home—April, 2024   The next day after my trip to Lansing with Muscle Ass, I was still wanting more sex.  Was there something in the water?  I haven’t had sex three days in a row for sometime now.  But I didn’t question it—I just went to the bookstore…   I am in the cocksucker’s seat.  Men are milling.  A tall, thin man around my age comes in.  I’d seen him out in the parking lot.  He still sports his hair at its 1977 length.  He stands beside me and pulls out a tiny, fla

On Directions Part 3

To all the square ones we encounter throughout our lives.   I’m currently in a transitional period of my life. For a long while now—the last couple of weeks or so—I was so determined to join the Air Force. And I want to take a moment, from this busy life, to reflect on that decision.   There was a point at my current job when I was working and I realised that Michelin had offered everything it could to me. That I had taken all that I could from this place—and that, in order t

On Silence

To the joy of living in the void.   I’ve been learning how to sit with silence for a while now.   There was a time, when I’d be driving with a friend, and we’d sit there—and whenever there was a silence, it would often feel awkward. Like we needed to fill the space with words, otherwise it’d feel uncomfortable. I’d imagine they felt the same.   That was a long time ago.   Now, I notice I’m able to sit with my friend, and we drive in silence—just taking in

Muscle Ass Gets in a Public Sling

Lansing—April, 2024 The very next night, Muscle Ass and I met again.  We really wanted to play together in front of others—incorporating men into our play if they wanted to join us.  We talked about where that might happen.  I thought the nearest bathhouse would be incredibly dead on a Thursday night.  There would likely be only cocksuckers at the bookstore nearest us.  I suggested we go up to the bookstore that might as well be a bathhouse with the various playspaces they have.  And we mig

Muscle Ass and the Power of Piss

My Playroom—April, 2024   Muscle Ass, the hot man working a contract in my area, was back for another few days.  Between his work schedule filling his days and the gig I was doing on most evenings; we were forced to meet for another late-night session.  We met on a Wednesday.  We chatted a bit.  He told me about an encounter he had the night before where he was fucked in the cab of a semi-truck by not one, but two drivers.  Repeatedly, as both were multi-cummers.  Hearing how awas

Using Braydon, the Cumslut

Near Home—March, 2024 I got a text from Braydon, the cubby younger man who loves taking loads and has developed a new passion for rimming me.  He wanted to meet.  I had a fairly open schedule.  He wanted some time for licking my ass, so he wondered if we should play at my place.  I thought that a good idea.  But we also both enjoy involving others in our fucking, so then he wondered if we should go to the bookstore.  I thought that was fine, too. In the end we did both.  We went to the

Jamie Gets Stretched and Filled

My Playroom—March, 2024   Out of the blue, Jamie sent me a text.  He was unexpectedly free; did I have time to play?  I did.  You’ve read about him here only occasionally as he lives some distance away and works a hard schedule.  He is also a reader of the blog.  He is the man who called me ‘the Hemingway of Porn,’ a title to which I strive to be worthy. He spent some time in the shower to freshen up after his long drive.  While he was doing that, I put on some fisting porn in the

Only 25 Minutes...and so much cum...

Near Home—March, 2024 You never know.  I have made that statement over and over on this blog.  If you go somewhere where men may have sex, even where there is a good track record that sex will likely happen, you just don’t know if it will.  Half the fun.  And the frustration.  On this Saturday afternoon, I don’t think it could have gotten any better…   I go into the straight side.  I really do seem to like straight porn when I go out, maybe as I have nothing but gay porn

Good Things Come/Cum to Those...

Near Home—March, 2024   My dick wouldn’t lie down.  Why else would I go to the bookstore the very next night?     The parking lot is near empty.  It’s a Saturday night.  This place, before Covid, used to be packed at this time.  I go in anyways.  I am alone in the straight theatre.  Jerking, rather contentedly.  The door opens.  It is the Minute Man.  The man who cums in under a minute, usually the moment he puts his dick in my mouth.  He nods, unzips, huffs poppers

Bathhouse Friday: Hot Mouths and Hairy Asses

Grand Rapids—March, 2024   Fucking Keshawn was explosively fun.  So much so, that I was still horned from it the next day.  And I knew a trip to the bookstore wasn’t likely to give me what I really wanted:  more ass.  I looked a little online, but nowadays I really like to go where there are men looking.  I decided to go to the bathhouse.  I’d had a good time on a Friday night the last time with Osvaldo, so off I went right after dinner… I check in.  A younger attendant is on duty

Fucking a Load Out of Keshawn

My Playroom—March, 2024   Keshawn and I had not seen each other since I had a gig near his home, back in the early fall.  We kicked around several ideas of another meet, but nothing fit both of our busy schedules.  I got a text at the beginning of March asking if I could play during the day.  I could, but I didn’t have the time for the round-trip travel down to him as my gig was each evening that month.  No problem, he would come up to me. So right in the middle of the month, he a

My biggest WTF party event

My biggest WTF moment was me and a fuck bud went down to a cruisy area under an onramp to a freeway that was never completed. We fixed 3 rigs, 2 x .4 and 1 x .7 that we were going to share. We planned on climbing under the ramp to do our slams, and about an hour or two later do the shared one with pigs watching us. Except my FB ‘accidentally’ gave me the .7 and as I was slamming it I realized something was off and I blasted off. I didn’t lose consciousness, but I lost awareness for an hour and a

On Music

To the songs that breaks us.   It is almost bedtime.   I am listening to one of my Vietnamese bolero songs, and suddenly, I have this urge to sing. I think of another song—one I’ve never been able to finish, that always catches in my throat, that always makes my voice waver.   I try again this time.   The song is called Mỗi Mùa Xuân Về Là Thêm Một Lần Dối Mẹ. It tells the story of a son who leaves his home country,  lies to his mother every spring, telling

On Time

To Time who we never get enough of.    A while back, whenever I planned things with my friends, because of the flexibility I had with work, with life, with time, I always found myself with more to spare.   And the people I called, the ones I asked to hang out, I always thought they were busier than me. Their schedules packed. Their days full.   So, I let them decide.   I told them to give me their availability, and I would plan around them. I always put my

Philip

Philip in productivity

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