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On Longing

To the ache of connections.   Today is the launch day of Switch 2. I sit in my room, playing Welcome Tour, a game that introduces the hardware in the form of minigames. It’s fun as hell, and I suddenly want to share this experience with someone. To tell them how cool this new piece of technology is. To geek out with me. I turn around, look at my empty room, and there’s no one here except me and the sound of my Switch. I feel a pang of sadness. I wish someone was here, right now, to exp

Fornication Weekend 2024 Part Two:  The Bukakke

Timberfell Resort—June, 2024 Thursday was the first official day for Fornication Weekend.  I had a lazy morning at my motel.  I made notes about yesterday and read a little.  I intended to arrive at the campground at 11, right as registration opened. I did just that, after finally finding parking.  I made my way to the office, dodging the vendors as they set up a tented booth by the entrance.  I rounded the corner of the office. The pool was packed with naked men of every age and descr

Fornication Weekend 2024 Part One:  The Trip and Arrival

Home—June, 2024 So, it was time for Fornication Weekend.  With the drive I had to make, it really became Fornication Week.  I packed the car on Monday night, June 17.  This year I was at a hotel 19 miles from the campground (the closest city with better motels.)  I had made my reservations a little later this year, and by the time I knew I could go, all the lodging at the camp was full.  And I wasn’t spending the weekend roasting in my tent.  I packed my tea kettle, books, lube, two sets of

Group Sex: Two Tongues Share a Wet Ass

Grand Rapids—June, 2024   The end of the second full week of June brought the house party I so often attend.  I packed the rimseat and drove north.  When I arrived, I found the diminutive host, and his long-dicked friend, completing the set up.  Soon we were joined by the smooth former athlete who is such a great fuck, an attractive salt and pepper haired bottom, a furry bearish top and the versatile Hot Tats who has appeared many times in these pages. We chatted.  I knew the

Would he be any different than the boy who cried wolf?

I got into a creative writing mode and wrote this. Please enjoy 🙂 — The year was one of melting ice cream and broken air conditioners. Archie Banks sat on the edge of the river that had once been lined with daisies, now reduced to nothing more than weeds and pieces of broken branches. He rolled up his checked shirt, skipped a few rocks, and as the clouds darkened, he held an old vintage photograph of a beautiful woman in one hand, creased and weathered by time, almost faded. Parts of h

Philip

Philip in Writing

A Door Makes All the Difference

Near Home—June, 2024   I had some more group play coming up at the end of the week.  I really wanted to go to Saturday’s house party with my balls empty—and churn up a fresh load while playing there. On Thursday, I went to my usual bookstore, the one that had suffered the accident.  I wanted see if I could get a little more comfortable in the new bigger room with two screens of porn.  It was evening, a time I don’t usually go…   The first thing I see, after I pay my admission

On Crossroads

To the part of ourselves that lingers.   A day after James and I stopped seeing each other, I went back on the Hinge app and started going through the backlog of guys who had liked me during the three weeks I’d been off the app—because I was dating James.   One guy in particular stood out. His name was Phil (short for Phillip with two Ls), and out of everyone I replied to, I secretly hoped he would be the one to text me back. Fortune had it—he was the only one who actually di

A Muscle Ass Fourway: "I Am So Fucked"

My Playroom—June, 2024 It was going to be something new in the playroom.  I think, without searching every last entry since I moved, I have never had more than two of us in this playroom.  I might have had a threeway there that I can’t remember, but on this night, there were going to be four—and I know that is new.  Muscle Ass was back in the area for work.  We had looked for some group play up in Lansing, but hadn’t really found it. So, this time, I wanted someone’s dick in him beside

How i became a cumdump slut: chapter 2

Back at our apartment the 3 of us got startef while Ben was organising drinks and party favours. Brandon and Michael wasted no time with their tounges down my throat, kissing and licking my neck while they stripped naked and stripped me down to my jockstrap.  Both in their late 30s their muscular and hairy bodies were in stark contrast to my smooth and slender frame. They pinched and twisted my nipples while I buried my face in their hairy armpits  working toward their nipples with my mouth

Hitting the Target

Jackson—June, 2024 On the last trip to the Jackson bookstore, the one with the lounge that has become a full play area, I had noticed a flyer taped to the door.  It said that the second Saturday of every month a group met in the lounge.  I asked the cashier about it.  She told me it tripled her attendance on that day. I knew I had to check it out. I got there right after noon, with a packed lunch for later.  The parking lot was jammed.  I barely found a place to park.  I went in,

A Hot Surprise as the New Porn Space Opens

Near Home—June, 2024 I had heard, via an online chat room, that the new theatre remodel (after the car accident took out the original two) was going fast.  It was set to reopen on the first Friday of the month.  Of course I had to be there!  I took off, after lunch, to see what they had done.  (It turned out that they had let people into the space by that Wednesday.) The old video arcade, with all those single booths, was gone, ripped out and the machinery sold to another video store. 

On Safe Spaces Part 2

To the harbours that we anchor.   I’m driving home from work. The traffic is bad. The sun is setting somewhere on the horizon. And a thought occurs to me.   I know what I am to people now. I am a harbour.   And this is what harbour means to me:   A harbour is a place for ships— ships that have been out at sea, weathered by the storm, damaged, but still able to find comfort in arriving.   The harbour is a sa

On Teasing

To the calm after the storm.   I’ve been trying to master the art of teasing. And I’ve come to realize that it’s a very delicate dance— a dance between lighting someone up and tearing them down.   The line is razor thin. And I find myself dancing on it at all times. It’s exhilarating. It’s challenging. But the payoff? The payoff is always so damn worth it that it’s worth dancing that line constantly for me.   Teasing is m

Keith Watches His Ass Get Plundered

My Playroom—June, 2024   One of the things I love about my life is how men I know keep popping back into my orbit.  I had met Keith at the group sex gathering in Grand Rapids.  We’d had some excellent sling time there.  Then he got busy and didn’t return to more recent group sessions.  But he’d taken my phone number.  Now, after two, almost three years, he reached out by text.  Could we meet?  We worked it out and on the first Tuesday of the month, Keith was in my playroom—strippe

On Feelings

To checking in on ourselves.   A wise friend of mine said something recently that stopped me in my tracks. He said, It’s important to check in with yourself— and ask, when you’re connecting with someone: How do they make you feel?   Do they make you feel seen? Do they make you feel safe? Or do they make you feel small— scared, anxious, unsure?   Do you feel inspired? Alive? Like you can breathe deeper?   Or mayb

On Love

To overflowing containers.   My whole life up until this point, I’ve always been searching for love. I used to think— romanticize— that love was something missing from me. That I was incomplete. And the world held the answer. Somewhere out there was a person who would find me, and fill the space.   But over the past few years— and more recently, more profoundly— that perspective has shifted.   Love isn’t mi

A Four Ass Saturday

Jackson—June, 2024 It was the first Saturday of the month.  I had thought about going to the bookstore/bathhouse in Lansing, but going online I found they had had an electrical fire.  The business was closed until it could be re-wired and a sprinkler system put in.  (Many in the chat room where this was talked about wondered if they would ever re-open.) At my usual haunt, the remodel after the car accident had just been started.  It was scheduled to open ‘soon.’ Two down.  One lef

On Evolving Spaces

To the corners we have yet to explore.   There are spaces in my life that are currently evolving. Spaces I’m stepping into— not for the first time, a space filled with fog. I can’t quite see what’s around me, only feel the shape of change brushing against my skin.   But every day, when I talk to someone new or read a line that lingers or watch a video that jolts something loose, I learn a little more about this space. A step c

Four Wet Pigs in a Playroom

Lansing—May, 2024 The next day, I had more sex.  It was good on Monday, when there were just the two of us in the playroom, but Tuesday there were four of us in a bigger playroom.  And it was wetter… I had been invited to join the couple I had met and played with so often at the Grand Rapids group.  I had been to their home before, but not for some time.  Top Host is as tall and as thin as I am.  He is hairy in all the right places, including his chest.  His cock is my length or so, bu

“Please. I’ve Always Wanted to…”

My Playroom—May, 2024 I got home tired, but safely, after the huge IML piss party.  I went to my meeting on Sunday and found there were about 3 and half minutes of it that applied to me, but I did meet some of the people I will be working alongside.   I also heard from the beautiful young man.  He had remembered FelchingPisser and sent me his phone number on BBRT.  In moments we were texting and he seemed turned on by the idea of my asking to post his ass pics with the write up. I wonder if

On Compatibility

To colliding worlds.    I’ve been thinking a lot recently about mutual interests— and how they shape compatibility.   Looking back now at my most recent dating experience with James, I realized we actually didn’t have anything in common.   And yet, I was still willing to make it work.   I’m the kind of person who finds peace in silence, in stillness. Someone who writes, reads, plays games, goes on long, quiet walks and hi

Day 2 at aex addiction anonymous group

The next sex addiction meeting was a week later  and i arrived late with a douched hole and wearing a cockring. Unlike the week before  everyone was seated in a circle, David and Adeel were sitting next to each other and I sat in a chair facing them trying my best  to avoid eye contact with them. There were 2 new guys that introduced themselves, an older  straight man into mtf and a twunk called Jamie that I worked with at my previous job and fucked when he was a twink.  The rest of us updated e
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