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On Endings Part 2

I am having an enlightenment at two in the morning, when I should be sleeping, but the allure of a mental breakthrough is so tempting, so I stay up. I think about how a relationship is like a plant in a pot, how I am the plant, spreading my roots, and the relationship defines the boundaries of the pot, and I keep trying to grow, but I can’t anymore, and I feel myself slowly dying in this small, suffocating pot. I realize now that K. and I have reached our natural limit, the edges of the pot

Philip

Philip in Relationships

After the Blizzard

Near Home—January, 2024 I was excited.  An old friend and fellow fuck bud had told me he would be in Chicago the second weekend of the month and asked if we could meet at the piss party held that Saturday.  It seemed a perfect way to reconnect.  And get wet together as we caught up. But winter in the Great Lakes area had other plans.  It started to snow on Friday.  Seven to eight inches for my area.  Then freezing rain that night and more snow all day Saturday.  I was snowbound.  An

Finally Breeding The Boi

Harvey was a tease. I met him when he was 18. My friend was trying to get with one of Harvey’s friends and we ended up going back to their place. My friend ended up hooking up with the other guy in one of the bedrooms and I sat talking with Harvey on the couch in the living room. He was a slender, blonde twink with soft features and great lips. I found out he was a total bottom. He straddled me on the couch and ground his ass on my crotch. “I bet you wanna fuck me,” he said. “Of course I do,” I

JamieLong

JamieLong in BB

On Directions

I am making my way down to South Melbourne Market today, heading to Chef Hat. I’m planning to buy some plates, the ones with raised circular edges. I’m following Apple Maps on my phone, and it’s leading me down a direction I don’t usually take, but I get to my destination nonetheless. It’s on the other side of the market, and I make a few turns here and there, searching for parking. I find a spot—30 minutes only. I turn off the engine, park, and step out. I make my way toward the shop, conf

Philip

Philip in Relationships

On Focus

This year, my focus is on the mind, body, and spirit—three pillars that I believe make life whole. The body is physical strength. I go to the gym three times a week, maybe six if I’m motivated, for at least 30 minutes a session. I want to build muscle, look better, and feel more confident. The mind is intellect. I read, I write, I consume knowledge. With AI, I can turn books into audiobooks and listen anywhere, maximizing my time. I’ve also learned to let go of books that don’t interes

Philip

Philip in Writing

"He Has a Mouth, Too!"

Near Home—January, 2024   I was ready for more by Thursday.  I drove to the bookstore after lunch, not sure what or who I’d find…   I am alone in the straight theatre.  Soon, a timid old white man comes in and sits as far away from me as possible.  I watch him watch the video.  He seems riveted to the sex on the screen.  Or the bouncing big tits.  He never touches himself.  Even through his pants.  After about eight minutes he seems satisfied—and leaves, never to be seen agai

On Endings

K. and I broke up today. It doesn’t feel real, and I’m still so numb about it all, although I can’t say I didn’t see it coming. We’ve been on a break for a couple of days, and I’ve been thinking about breaking up too—not because of anything he did. No. He was always perfect. It’s because I’ve realized that I can’t make him happy simply by being me. I feel like I can be myself around him, but it seems like he’s always holding his breath, describing our relationship as stepping into a minefie

Philip

Philip in Relationships

On Grace

Grace is something that has always fascinated me, like a dancer moving across the stage, effortlessly, efficiently, their feet barely touching the ground but still moving, always moving. How is it possible for something to be so quiet, so fluid, yet so deliberate? This topic captivates me, and I’ve tried to bring that same grace into my life. I practice it in the way I move—swift but calm, like a dancer, not to be confused with swift but deadly, like a ninja. It’s in the way I set the table

Philip

Philip in Writing

Big Mouth

Near Home—January, 2023   It should be no surprise that after all the ass play with Ross, that I wanted something different.  I went to the closest (and most reliable) bookstore, wanting some oral action.  And I didn’t care which side of it I was on…   The straight theatre is busy.  There are men standing along the back wall.  More are scattered around in the rows of seats.  All the single seats against the wall are taken.  I sit in the middle, on a two-seat bench.  There is

On Loneliness

Today, I was listening to an audiobook called How to Make Friends as an Adult for Dummies, and there was a chapter about loneliness that got me thinking. This was something I struggled with a few years ago, back when I was still single and frustrated with my dating life. Naturally, I felt quite alone. I had friends to talk to, but it wasn’t the same because most of them were couples—they didn’t have much time to spare for me. I would come home from work, go to the gym, and then sit down at my co

Philip

Philip in Writing

On Tunnels

I am in a tunnel with my sister and her friends. I am 14 years old, and we are bored. I’ve seen this tunnel before on one of my walks around the park near my house, water trickling out of it, dark and gloomy, my curiosity piqued, but I never dared to wander through it, though I always wanted to. I am excited when someone suggests it, and here we are, walking through it after checking if the coast is clear, it is. There are six of us: me, my sister, her best friend, and three other friends w

Philip

Philip in Writing

Reunion With Ross: "Try for a Double"

North of Home—January, 2024   It is likely that I picked up my cold at either of the two visits to the bookstore on Dec 31 or January 1.  I felt lousy and had a nose that wouldn’t stop running (unless you counted the evenings in bed where all that mucus slid down my throat instead.)  I worried that I would have to cancel my planned meeting with Ross. Sometime after I got back from New Jersey, we had set up a date for January 6.  I looked back in the blog and found that we had not

On Mantras

I have a number of life mantras, pillars of life you might call them, that I try to live by. 1. You reap what you sow. This one is simple—you get out what you put in. I always try to do the very best I can, because I know that at the end of the day, your efforts are rewarded. And if they’re not for whatever reason, they will be later down the track. For those unwilling to put in the effort, life won’t hand them what they want. An example of this for me is going to the gym. Lately, I ha

Philip

Philip in Writing

On Introduction

I am Philip Nguyen, just an ordinary person living an ordinary life. I’m sitting at my desk, writing these words on an iPad I bought sometime this year, beyond my budget, but I’m glad I did. It’s one of those little joys in my life that I try to nurture. I often think about having a luxurious life and the ways in which one can foster it. I first came across this idea on a podcast where the speaker said that having flowers scattered across the house is a splendid way to have a luxurious life

Philip

Philip in Writing

On Money

I have this weird relationship with money. I guess everyone has some sort of relationship with money in their own unique way. My family and I grew up poor. We came here when I was four and my sister was five. My parents took on random jobs before eventually landing in sewing. I remember growing up, even though I went to a public school in the western suburbs, every year my sister and I would get nervous about how much they needed to pay for uniforms, books, and stationery. We often bought t

Philip

Philip in Money

On relationships

Sometimes, I feel like I’m not good at this whole relationship thing. I doubt myself constantly. I think about how I’m supposed to be supportive, kind, and gentle, and lately, I don’t feel like I’m living up to any of those things. Take my partner’s hobby, for example. I encouraged him to get back into drawing, and when he decided to do it, I thought, “Good on him, that’s a great idea.” But that’s about where my excitement ended. He asked me for help upscaling one of his images, and while I

Philip

Philip in Relationships

"Stand Up and Fuck My Face!"

Near Home—January, 2024 I woke up on New Year’s Day, after the marathon of sucking at the bookstore the day before, with a raging hardon.  I hadn’t shot myself while working so hard to get off the guy who reminded me of Robert Mitchum.  The moment I poured boiling water over my tea bag, I knew I was going back.  I guessed the place would have low attendance, but it would just take one mouth or ass to do the job…   I arrive right after lunch.  There are actually a few cars in the l

On everything

Writing and AI There was a time, not long ago, when I stopped writing almost entirely. I was convinced that the emergence of AI would be able to produce much better writing that I ever could. Honestly, it probably can. But recently, I’ve started to see things differently. Instead of feeling defeated, I’ve learned to work with AI, letting it sharpen my words and speed up processes that would’ve taken me hours. It doesn’t take away my voice; it enhances it. I’ve realized that using AI doesn’t

Philip

Philip in Writing

On Gaming

For those who know me very well, you’d know that gaming has always been a major pillar in my life, now and forever. I still vividly recall a day in primary school when I came home, and my mother told me and my sister that my dad had gotten us a present. I had no idea what it could be, but when I saw the Super Nintendo Entertainment System (SNES) with him playing Super Mario World, I was amazed. I had a go, but it was super difficult, and I didn’t play it much at first—my dad seemed to enjoy it m

Philip

Philip in Gaming

"Suck the Scum Out of Me!"

Near Home—December, 2023 It was New Year’s Eve.  And I couldn’t decide what to do.  I was planning a Chicago trip for the second weekend of January, so I knew I wasn’t going there.  I didn’t want to go as far as Toronto, for either the time in the car or expense.   Last year I rang in the New Year fucking at the huge bookstore/bathhouse complex north of me but, still weary from my long layover coming back from New Jersey, I knew I couldn’t spend the length of time there to justify the admis

A Bookstore Two Parter: Two -- Cute College Kid Gets Naked

Near Home—December, 2023   Part Two:  In the Gay Theatre (This picks up where we left off in the last post.) As I come out of the rest room, I see a familiar face.  It’s the cute college kid who jerked off on the woman’s breasts when we both played with the bisexual couple.  He smirks at me, nods and goes into the gay cinema.  I follow his hot little ass into the gay theatre. He is just sitting down, in the corner, to the left of the open cocksucker’s seat.  Of course, I

FelchingPisser

FelchingPisser in Bookstore

A Bookstore Two-Parter: One -- Losing his Virginity

Near Home—December, 2023   Part One:  In the Straight Theatre   The trip home from Jersey was technically trouble free, but it had the longest layover I have ever experienced.  I got home exhausted in the middle of the afternoon on the Thursday after Christmas.  The last thing I wanted was sex.  I awoke on Friday feeling totally refreshed—and horned.  Seriously hard.  I went to the bookstore…   I have my hand on the doorknob of the straight theatre when he stops me

FelchingPisser

FelchingPisser in Bookstore

Rudy Comes Home Horny

Jersey City—December, 2023   So, we celebrated.  My birthday had been just before I arrived in New Jersey.  My brother’s partner’s birthday and their wedding anniversary are the same day—that was the special dinner.  Oh, and then Christmas… The day after, my phone dinged.  Rudy was back from his time with his parents in the Midwest.  Was I still interested in playing tomorrow?  I was.  And told him so.  We set a time.  But Rudy was eager.  He checked in with me the next morning. 

FelchingPisser

FelchingPisser in Fuck Buds

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