cam1972

None of them. I enjoy being submissive, but the rest of the descriptions do not apply to me. Would I have sex all day every day if physically possible? Sure. But my job description doesn't include "Escort". Life doesn't afford me the luxury of having nothing to do but look for cock. So... I'm a bottom who submits to men... When I get the rare chance.

Mine was deleted so here is my new one. http://tam1026.tumblr.com/

I don't hide behind anything. Victim-mongering? I don't play the victim. Saying I didn't chase doesn't make me a "victim-monger". I take responsibility for my choices in life. But even if I were, that wouldn't change the truth of my posts. Everything I have said is relevant. The same can not be said of you. Again, PrEP is used for anti virus use. Get it right. I refuse to engage in your hate mongering thread any longer. When you start accusing me of doing things that I'm not, I definitely lose any interest in what you have to say. Your words hold no value. You aren't here to discuss and learn. You can't be reasoned with. You don't want to be educated. You just want to attack and hate. You go right ahead and live in your utopian world. Where everyone should be perfect and be just like you. Life is going to be one huge disappointment after another for you. I'll leave you with this: I've found that people like you that judge and trash others for doing things usually have a lot of things they hide from others. Habits that others would find abhorrent or wrong. Or even be guilty of the very thing they trash others for. It's crazy to quote it here, but I will: He who is without sin, cast the first stone. I'm certain you don't qualify. Go ahead and try and bait me again. I'm not going to bite anymore. I'm done.

I never said every cancer was caused by lifestyle choices. Mine wasn't. You don't need to feel the need to educate me on that. I've been there as well. Quit misquoting and making things fit your argument. PrEP is used to keep people from getting the virus HIV, not AIDS. You show your ignorance by not knowing the difference. The fact that I'm HIV positive but don't have to worry about dying of AIDS is anything but problematic for me. Or any other person that contracted the disease. Nor should it be for the taxpayers since we won't have the costly hospital bills that AIDS brings with it. In that same vein, if PrEP can keep the number of infections lower, then it is a cheaper alternative in the long run. Your numbers don't add up. Speaking from experience yet again, the ones who have thrown hate my way didn't even know there was such a thing as chasing the bug. While I don't pretend to understand the thinking behind chasing, I don't believe for a second that the chasers are helping create the stigma. The three letters do that on their own. And lack of education. You are a good example. The stigma remains because people are too lazy to educate themselves. Using you as an example: you say having sex only with men who were tested and are disease free is a good way to keep from getting infected. That is ignorant. You don't know who they have had sex with since being tested. They could be poz and not have the symptoms. They could have a high viral load and neither of you be the wiser. A medicated undetectable person has been proven to be less of a threat. How do you think so many have been infected? Because of ignorant thinking such as yours. When I spoke about compassion, I was referring to your all inclusive statements about people with HIV. Your comments have been harsh and hateful. That said, you are all over the map. You bitch about these people in one sentence yet in the very next sentence you say you would be more inclined to envy them. I'm having a hard time taking you seriously. I'll say this and I'm done: the more of your posts I read, the more I see how uneducated about the VIRUS and DISEASE (two separate things) you really are. Quit wasting people's time and go educate yourself.

A couple of things: chemo costs MUCH more than HIV meds. Yet you wouldn't deny cancer patients the right to have treatment. Nor complain about the astronomical cost shared by insurance holders. Some cancers are preventable yet you would not deny those patients the right to treatment. So it's not right that you single out this disease/virus. Second, not having to worry about AIDS is problematic? I'm very thankful we don't. Would you rather the drug preventing AIDS (and protecting against contracting HIV) had never been discovered? I understand why you say that, but think of the cost of lives had it not been found. That is rather selfish on your part. And very narrow minded. I don't understand your reason for singling out ONE health issue when there are MANY health issues caused by bad habits. And are far more costly. Third and last: having HIV, the stigma is already there. You should look up HIV stigma on YouTube and learn from it. They are trying to change people just like you. People are already stigmatizing gays. Hell.. You have. Your comments in the very first post did that. You put us all in one generalized basket. The lame stream media doesn't have to pick up the story to accomplish that. It's already there. I have been told that I'm a threat to society, that I'm a waste of space and air, and that I should eat a bullet. And these were gay people who told me that. So I already deal with the stigma. Having YOU come on here and further that onto a message board that has become a community for me to feel free and accepted and not have to worry about being judged for what I have is very frustrating. To say the least. I already look at the price every damn time I get my meds from the pharmacy and realize the cost others have to share. But there's not a damned thing I can do about it. Instead of spouting off, go find a big bottle of compassion and swallow it all. We all come from different walks of life on here. Some did get it by chasing, but I'm betting the majority did not. We each have our own story. And they don't belong in the fiction section. Fantasy rarely lives up to reality, and what we are living is not fantasy. It is reality. One that stares us in the face every time we open the pill bottle. We can talk all we want about how people should do this and shouldn't do that, but we don't live in perfect bodies in a perfect world. Humans fuck up. And there is always a price to pay. This isn't Utopia. It's planet earth. So stop the stigmatizing yourself. Some of us beat ourselves up enough about having it. We don't need others helping. I look forward to the day this thread is no longer on the front page. May it be very soon.

Now that says it all. I fucking love that last statement. Going to have to remember that.

I'm with you 100 percent.

I wasn't being defensive. If you would read post after post after post I've made encouraging guys not to chase and saying they don't want it, you would see I definitely don't get off on being a bad boy. Hell.. I haven't had sex in two years. I think I lost my bad boy status (if I ever had it) a long time ago. My response to the one post about making a generalization for "bible bashers" applies to the OP's post. He generalized. You can't make a blanket statement about any one group in society. I've never seen so much diversity as I have in the "gay community". Hell... In the poz community. What can be said about one person doesn't apply to all. We are all different. No one is alike. For example: You say for you, the moral transgression of barebacking is a big part of the attraction. Not for me. I don't even give that a thought. I just love skin on skin fucking. Has nothing to do with it being a social taboo. I don't give thought to the PC crap that has overtaken the world. I don't give thought to what Christians or Muslims say about homosexuality or barebacking. That's not what makes it appealing to me. If it is for others, cool All that said, I would normally agree with you in regards to not being able to read intent and tone in a written message. But just as I can't truly say what his intent was (even tho I have my opinion), neither can you. That also goes both ways. But I'm not here to argue that. Or argue period. I just gave my two cents' worth. I respect yours and agreed with it. And still do. But for someone to come on here and make statements about how we are costing others when I didn't chase it nor wanted it and can't do anything about that burden for others other than stopping my meds... I'm not going to be made to feel like shit about something that took too damn long for me to accept in the first place. I'm not surprised at his post. You spend any given amount of time on this site, and you are surprised by nothing on here. I'm definitely not having a shouting match but merely expressing my view points. And since intent and tone can't be read in text, I will state that I am neither upset or angry in this post. Or any others I have made. I am merely stating why I said what I said. And responding to your statements.

Ok... We don't like the generalizations made about gay people, right? So why do you feel the need to be hypocritical and make a generalization about "bible bashers"? I guarantee you that the vast majority of obese people never step foot in a church nor read a bible. While I agree with your point, I don't think pinning it on "bible bashers" is a fair thing to do. Are there Christians who are obese? Definitely. Is every obese person a Christian? No. Is every Christian obese? No. Is every gay person poz? No. Did every poz person chase? No. So generalizations aren't beneficial to an argument. They take away from the real issue. Attacking others only takes us down to other attackers level. And does nothing to encourage tolerance. I agree. Whole heartedly. But I think there's a better way of doing it than attacking people. I don't believe for one minute the OP had any good intentions for posting. His statements make it out that everyone on here wanted the virus. To put it in a term everyone will understand: bullshit. That said, I have felt from the beginning that those who chase or deliberately infect have self worth issues. Or don't have any regard for their well being or anyone else's. I have found from experience that if you try to educate a chaser, more often than not, he just moves on to someone else that will infect him. I've also found that they can be extremely uneducated. They think it's a pass to fuck with anyone they want with no fear. That is a foolish notion since it cuts your pool of men who are willing to fuck a poz guy down quite a bit. I've had far less sex since being poz than I did before being poz. And they also don't think of the ramifications of being poz when it comes to one's health. But while I think education is key, I still believe it's something deeper emotionally or mentally. But again, I don't think the OP had any of this kind of conversation in mind when he posted. He was purely attacking. While I don't dwell on having HIV every moment of every day, I don't need some asshat coming on here and making me feel even less human for having it.

There are so many things to take issue with in the OP's statement. But I'll take on just two. First: a lot on here didn't ask for the bug. Didn't chase and never wanted it. But they got it anyway. Being on here gives those people a little bit of a sense of belonging. Not judged for having what they didn't ask for. Until posts like these pop up. So of course they are going to take the meds. Why wouldn't they? Second: There are individuals on here that don't glorify HIV necessarily. They just enjoy bareback sex. Horses of a different color.

Pretty sure this topic has been covered multiple times, but I'll have a go at it again since this once again puts bottoms on a lower level than tops. If I, as a bottom, become hard, why should it matter one fuck to the top? Is he going to become self conscious about the size of his dick? Awwwww. My dick is not a clit. It's not a useless piece of flesh to just hang and flop around while being fucked. I was created with one for a reason. And I'm going to jack the hell out of it while getting fucked. Dom/subs: that's a different story. But in the typical top/bottom dynamic, why should it matter? If the top is getting ass, why should he care? Sex is pleasure for BOTH. It's not a one sided act. Bottoms are humans. Just like the top. And we sure as hell have a right to pleasure our cock, come (cum is what comes out of the dick) and still manage (quite well, I might add) to make the top feel incredible. Could I get fucked in chastity? Yeah. Would I get fucked in chastity? No thank you. Hope this answers your question.

Not a myth. There may not be as many out there as there were ten years ago, but they are still out there. I met one just a couple of days ago. Once I said I would not fuck with a condom, he bolted. There will always be someone out there that will always want protection. Hell, my ex wouldn't even bareback with me. And we both had the same status. So, no... Not a myth.

It's ok NLbear. Don't let them get under your skin. That's what they want. You will notice that every thread they start is about how this hook up went wrong and that hook up went wrong. And it was in this city and state and that city and state. And now he's fucking guys in third world countries. Don't buy into the hype. They either are just looking for attention or making fun of the site. Either way, don't buy into it. I'm done with this site. They've taken what was a nice place for poz guys to not feel alone and made a mockery of it. I won't be following this thread, so I don't care what they have to say. If they are for real, I don't care either. Life is too short to bitch and complain about everything. And it's too short to waste my time on attention seekers and players. I'm out.

If he's 100% straight, keep dreaming. He's not going anywhere near a man's ass or cock. The idea that every individual has some gay tendencies is ridiculous. That means that every gay man has some straight tendencies. It can't be one sided. I know many on here who would rather lick puke up from the floor before they'd fuck a woman. That conversion is never gonna happen. Not with a 100% straight man. Hot fantasy? Yes. Gonna happen? Nope.

I put it on my profile. Then I don't have to tell them. Although I do still ask if they noticed my status. You'll win some and lose some. Just a part of having "the gift".....

He may have become pissy because he assumed (which isn't a good thing) that you were a flake like most others on Grindr. Obviously you aren't, but that is probably why. As you've discovered, it gets very frustrating having guys act interested and then cancel on you. Never to be seen again. I imagine he has experienced the same thing. As far as what he wants and what you wanted, you just have to be blunt on those apps. Don't assume he is reading your mind. That will help avoid situations like you had. As far as his awkward behavior, I've found that some people just don't know how to communicate. And he may have been very nervous. There could be many reasons why things happened as they did. Including this one: he may have just been weird. Look at it this way: you weren't robbed, you weren't raped, you weren't injured... I'd take a weird personality any day over those. Using apps like Grindr means you have to take chances. Some will be worth it, others will be a waste of time. What chances you take depend on how badly you need a fuck. Just watch out for yourself. No one else will.

I have already told you how I feel about this thread. i think it's an important topic. I would be happy to see NEW points of views on this thread. But there haven't been any for quite some time. Different words/same thoughts. From both sides. And until misterpiggy made his post, this topic had went off the front page. It was dead. And that means no new people were coming to this thread and making points of views known. But if someone new wants to contribute something new or repeat what everyone else said, then go right ahead. I'm not trying to stop them. Do I think new points can be made? I guess anything is possible, but they haven't been for a while now. I have made my views known so many times that I feel like a stuck record (another reason for leaving the thread). And now, instead of discussing the real topic, we've gone to arguing over statements made that have nothing to do with YOUR original post. Used to be, the moderators would have stepped in by now and said to keep it on topic. So, how I really feel about this thread is that it's went off the rails. And it has become irrelevant. Not the original thought. That will always be relevant. But this thread has become irrelevant. Until it gets back on topic, there's no point in posting. Since I do not feel like hashing over statements made, I'm going to let you at it. The floor is yours. I'm not upset. I'm not angry. I just honestly don't care to argue over this anymore. I've had respect for you throughout this thread. You can disagree with someone and still have respect. I'd like to leave while I still hold some of that for you. Here's to someone new coming along and blowing our socks off with a very informative post that has a viewpoint that no one has even thought of. Let's see if it happens.

He specifically asked me to copy and paste what I posted earlier from a private message to him. Saying that he didn't know all that I had said and was learning so much and so many could learn from what I had to say. That everyone was hanging on to my every word. He said THAT! I can copy and paste his messages if you like. For him to then come one here and reply as he did and contradict everything he said in private messages gives me every right to be a little more than ready to leave this thread. I don't enjoy being played like that. I'm not leaving the thread because I need to win. I couldn't give two fucks about that. I feel the need to leave because I deserve a little more respect than that. Don't pretend to agree with me in private only to disagree in public. That's being two faced. It's not about people not sharing my views. If that were the case, I would never come on this site. If you will notice, I don't agree with a lot that is posted on here. But it's their right to post their opinions. Just as it is mine. And I do enjoy seeing others' points of views. I'm wrong a lot. And will admit when I am. So don't assume the reasons why I said I was leaving the thread. My being right or wrong has nothing to do with it. I don't really care if misterpiggy is right or wrong. Because, as I said, I think this topic has become a dead horse that is getting beaten way more than it needs to be. Things are just being repeated. Which I told misterpiggy that when he wanted me to copy and paste my private message to him. I told him I had said all of those things at least a few times. But he insisted. And now I know why. As far as brownie points for bbzh, that was a low blow. I don't know him and he doesn't know me. He can agree with me just as misterpiggy agrees with you. I don't see anyone calling either one of you out on that. Because that is what happens on a board like this. People agree and people disagree. Nothing wrong with that. But be respectful about it. I have no anger towards anyone. I don't know any of you, so it would be a waste of time and energy. But I will be much more careful about private messages. Lesson learned.

Politely said: Bullshit. Then again: if a top doesn't listen to the bottom when asked to pull out and fills him with cum anyway, you are right... The playing field isn't even. The bottom becomes a better man than the asshole who just deliberately disregarded the human right of the bottom. And as far as bottoms being the passive and therefor the lesser of the two, the feminist movement may have an argument with you there as well. That line of thinking is antiquated and has been debunked. Welcome to the year 2016. The 1800's are calling and they want your thoughts back. It's very obvious that you want to be right in this. Regardless as to whether your thoughts have merit. I had said my piece and left. You begged me to come back because I "have so much insight to offer and such valid points". Your words. Yet you shoot them down every chance you get. You just want to beat the dead horse til well after it's been shipped off to the glue factory. I'm out. I don't feel the need to always be right and "win". Enjoy.

All these labels.... When do they end? It all sounds like psycho-therapy mumbo jumbo. "Self identifying"? "Straight identifying"? I can identify myself as a stallion. Doesn't make me one. So either way, the OP is at the very least getting fucked by someone who is not really straight. He may call himself that, but in truth, he just doesn't have the courage to admit he's at least bi. And to me, that's a turn off. Being honest with ones self is as important as being honest with others. So to answer the OP's question, nah... Give me someone who is confident in what he is. Be it bi or gay. The fact that he enjoys pussy too is irrelevant to how good the fuck is.

Even if the guy was legit (I don't think he was), pushiness always makes me question a guy. Snaketat may be right in the opinion that he may have had a lot of guys flake on him, but maybe his demeanor is the reason SOME have flaked. I've had more guys flake than an itchy scalp, but that doesn't make me pushy. I always go with my gut. I'd rather be safe than sorry. i think you made the right call. I'm with you on the game playing. Fucking hate mind games. Either you're in or you're not. Don't waste my time when you know you have no intentions of meeting.

The question I have is has he ever said this specific phrase to you before? To go out of his way to send a text after you've already went your separate ways is what makes me think it's more about pozzing than it is the normal verbal aggression. It's one thing to say things like breed and seed while fucking, but a whole different story when the fucking has ended and the statement is made later on. The whole phrasing of his text and the timing of it is what makes me think it's about pozzing. I'd find out. Either by asking or getting tested a few times.

I had every intention of keeping my word and leaving this thread. Even unfollowed it. But misterpiggy wrote me and asked me to come back. I wrote him and asked him some things. He asked me to post it here. So.......... Here you go, misterpiggy. Nelliess is correct. The laws for homosexual sex are the same as heterosexual sex. Here in the USA as well. Consent must continue through the entire act. And I do not give up any right to a top when he has his bare cock in my ass. We are on an even playing field. Unless, as he stated, it's a Dom sub relationship. The top does not dictate what I do. That would be the same as him demanding one take his piss and drink it. If the bottom finds that revolting (crazy, I know), then he has the right to say no. Look... I am so over the political correctness that has taken over the world. No one truly has freedom anymore. And I certainly don't want to take freedom from anyone. But that goes for bottoms as well. It's been said before, tops are not gods. They do not get to dictate what happens. My point all along has been that if a top and bottom discuss what will happen, then there is no need to give up rights or no need for worry about whether the bottom is going to ask the top to pull out. Help me understand why that is such a burden? I'm sincerely asking. I'm not talking about bath house scenarios. There.... The bottom takes it bare, he knows he's gonna get the load. But in hook ups, why not hash it out before even meeting up? What's the issue with that? Again, sincerely asking.

1: I do not nor have I ever claimed to have a monopoly on all the answers in this thread. I definitely do not. 2: My emotions are in check. This hasn't struck a nerve. I was merely discussing as everyone else has been. 3: I was not being disrespectful. I just didn't appreciate being compared to children. You wouldn't either. I will unfollow this thread so you can continue your thoughts on the matter without any interference from me. No hard feelings.

Everyone who has participated in this thread has been respectful. Unless I read it wrong, this post was not. We who disagree with your point of view are not having a warm and fuzzy discussion here. Nor are we children. We've responded with maturity and kindness. You keep saying "if you want this" or "if you want that"... Well... If you want a site where everyone agrees with you, start one. We all are different from each other and we all are never going to completely agree on everything. We are humans, and all are different. That's what makes this site great. But respect should be given, regardless of opinions. You say if we want to talk about journeys... Chasing in and of itself is a journey. And that's a major topic on this site. You may disagree with others, but, kindly said, do it with respect. No one in this thread has acted like a child. Up until a couple of posts ago. In regards to your question: I have several questions, but out of respect, I'm not going to ask them. I'm standing by what I said earlier. If it were discussed beforehand (in the hook up scenario) then NO ONE would have to be upset or disappointed. It takes five seconds to have that discussion. There are plenty out there (including me) that willingly take loads. Find them instead of forcing someone else to do so that doesn't want to. Just as we don't want everyone else's desires for life forced on us (as this thread has so thoroughly proven), we shouldn't force ours on them. That would be incredibly hypocritical of us.