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Any tips on training a bottom to stay soft during sex?


sublondon

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I am a total bottom and I am very curious about learning to stop getting erections when aroused. Becoming submissive has been a long process for me, and a large part of that was learning not to wank off during sex, thanks to a fantastic Top who taught me how to become totally anal-dependent for pleasure. Despite this, I still get hard whenever i get horny, and I'm looking into ways of training myself, or getting trained by my Man to not get hard at all. Was just wondering if any of you managed to teach yourselves this, how you did it? I considered whether any behavioural methods through the use of punishment could help, or any physical methods such as taping down, chastity belts etc...

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Obviously there are a number of drugs, both legal and illegal, that are known to affect erectile function as a whole. It might be "cheating" but that would be one potential solution. I suppose standard behavior therapy would also work, i.e. associating an erection with an unpleasant sensation, whatever that might be for you (pain, scolding from your partner, etc.). I personally enjoy fucking a guy who stays hard throughout, but to each his own.

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Erections are awesome, man. Why do you think being submissive means not having a natural response to the pleasure of being with a man? Punishment? Chastity belts? Drugs? Fuck that. Many tops like it when you stay hard during a fucking. Be good to your self.

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Erections are awesome, man. Why do you think being submissive means not having a natural response to the pleasure of being with a man? Punishment? Chastity belts? Drugs? Fuck that. Many tops like it when you stay hard during a fucking. Be good to your self.

In that case are any Doms/Tops/Masters at all turned on by bottoms that don't get hard at all?

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I would think a cock cage would prevent an erection. Initial investment depending on the type you purchase but you'll have a very long time and the way it keeps your dick it isn't possible to get an erection. Maybe if you wear it long enough you naturally wont get an erection anymore. But you would proably need a key holder so you couldn't take it off yourself.

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Im one of those guys who gets more pleasure from anal than anything to do with my cock, so its natural for me to stay soft during sex or anything like that. idk, maybe its just me.. just who i am. but a lot of times i dont even cum.. idk, im just a total sub bottom.. i dont need that.

So i really dont have any advice other than just take a dildo and ride on it for ages until u go soft.. then keep riding it and get the feeling, then u can duplicate that

if u never go soft.. idk, ur out of luck

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I'm total bottom and find that when i clench my arse to make it tight for my top it helps keep my cock hard, but if i relax my arse completely my cock goes soft. It's a matter of whether I want my top to feel a nice tight arse hole round his cock or he wants it loose and sloppy.

BTW - if i'm getting fisted i have to relax my hole to get the hand in me - so i'm usually totally soft when i get fisted.

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Hey sub. I like your thinking. Personally, it's a turn on to see a bottom be soft as he is getting bred. It's like, "I'm a sub and my job is to just take your cock and cum. My pleasure is not important."

I am a total bottom and I am very curious about learning to stop getting erections when aroused. Becoming submissive has been a long process for me, and a large part of that was learning not to wank off during sex, thanks to a fantastic Top who taught me how to become totally anal-dependent for pleasure. Despite this, I still get hard whenever i get horny, and I'm looking into ways of training myself, or getting trained by my Man to not get hard at all. Was just wondering if any of you managed to teach yourselves this, how you did it? I considered whether any behavioural methods through the use of punishment could help, or any physical methods such as taping down, chastity belts etc...
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Not sure how you would stay soft unless you work on it mentally. Concentrate on the tops cock and don't do anything to stimulate your cock. Most of the time I stay soft to semi hard unless the top is playing with my cock or we are flip fucking, then I stay hard. When I top, I love it when the bottom stays soft...hot!

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I'm total bottom and find that when i clench my arse to make it tight for my top it helps keep my cock hard, but if i relax my arse completely my cock goes soft. It's a matter of whether I want my top to feel a nice tight arse hole round his cock or he wants it loose and sloppy.

BTW - if i'm getting fisted i have to relax my hole to get the hand in me - so i'm usually totally soft when i get fisted.

You're basically doing Kegel exercises while you're getting fucked, which explains how and when you get an erection.

***

A couple of things I've observed that might help. I've noticed that for most guys, pain kills an erection quite effectively. It doesn't have to be severe...discomfort may be enough. Having the top force you into an uncomfortable position maybe, or fucking a little more aggressively than you like (obviously this won't work for pain pigs).

You might want to try jacking off a load before sex and then jumping straight into the fucking. Most men, especially as we age, have a bit of a recovery time built in before we can get hard again.

You might also want to try having sex with a full bladder. I've noticed that can intervene with my ability to keep and maintain an erection. Plus, if you're a piss pig, the top might hit the right place and make you piss yourself.

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I agree with MascMountainMan about associating pain with Rough Fucking-It still works for me but obviously through time I'm going to turn into a pain pig which is fine too-always preferred being fucked to go the way of Rape instead of being about my pleasure-the satisfaction that comes from being used lasts far longer then merely cumming.

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