Anyone else like a soft cock when they fuck their bottom boy

[find91]

3 hours ago, justsexnowatl said:

I love it when bottoms are hard.  I read what so many bottoms here are saying, but it just SEEMS like they're more into it if they're hard.  I recently reconnected with a bottom buddy after he was gone "dating" someone for 3 years.  I used to just do "ass up" pump n dumps on him, usually in a jock.  I never paid attention to his cock, and it seemed like he preferred it that way.  This time around it's more full on sex, which is definitely my preference!!  We now always start making out as soon as he comes in the door....by the time I start taking his clothes off and pushing him down to his knees his monster uncut cock is rock hard every time.  I'm vers and it kinda kills me that he's a total bottom.  I still gag it down my throat some before I turn my attention to his bubble butt, and I'm pretty sure he likes it.  Each time I've fucked him this go-around he's been naked and rock hard - never touching himself till after I've bred him.  Then he keeps riding my cock after I cum and jacks himself off.  Last time I scooped his load up and shared it making out..  I get that some pigs are collecting loads and going for quantity.  If a bottom keeps their cock trapped in a jock or other clothes (or is just soft anyway), I take the clue and just breed and go!  But I LOVE if they're hard and even better if they cum! 

I suspect he covers up his cock because he don't want to be harassed to top

[tallslenderguy]

3 hours ago, justsexnowatl said:

I love it when bottoms are hard.  I read what so many bottoms here are saying, but it just SEEMS like they're more into it if they're hard.  I recently reconnected with a bottom buddy after he was gone "dating" someone for 3 years.  I used to just do "ass up" pump n dumps on him, usually in a jock.  I never paid attention to his cock, and it seemed like he preferred it that way.  This time around it's more full on sex, which is definitely my preference!!  We now always start making out as soon as he comes in the door....by the time I start taking his clothes off and pushing him down to his knees his monster uncut cock is rock hard every time.  I'm vers and it kinda kills me that he's a total bottom.  I still gag it down my throat some before I turn my attention to his bubble butt, and I'm pretty sure he likes it.  Each time I've fucked him this go-around he's been naked and rock hard - never touching himself till after I've bred him.  Then he keeps riding my cock after I cum and jacks himself off.  Last time I scooped his load up and shared it making out..  I get that some pigs are collecting loads and going for quantity.  If a bottom keeps their cock trapped in a jock or other clothes (or is just soft anyway), I take the clue and just breed and go!  But I LOVE if they're hard and even better if they cum! 

i know with some guys it's all about quantity of loads, and that can be hot, but that's not a driver for me. For me, it's more the feeling that i have met my Tops need and desire to breed. And that's not some sort of bottom altruism, to me it's a turn off when a guy says he wants to please me and i get the sense that i am somehow unnecessary in the equation. i see the Top/bottom dynamic as symbiotic. i need/desire a Tops need/desire to penetrated and breed me. 

In that vein, staying soft is about my internal wiring. Honestly, it doesn't matter to me if i stay soft or get hard, what matters is how the guy i am with responds to that.  i often don't hook with versatile guys because it seems most want to use my penis in some way that makes me feel like they are wanting me to be top (just as you note).  

i spent a weekend with a versatile guy last spring.  We talked online for a long time before getting together and i was painfully and tediously clear about being a bottom and what that meant to me, that i didn't want my penis touched and why. He was very affirming, said that wasn't a problem and that he understood. He made me cum twice that weekend by touching my penis. sigh. After he went home, he wrote and asked how i felt about the weekend. When i confronted him about using my penis, he got defensive and made fun of the fact that i didn't want my penis touched. Bottom line is, he just didn't get it. On an intellectual level he may have had some grasp, but psychologically he just didn't relate and apparently couldn't get it. 

i've had Dom guys make me cum using my penis, but that has been very different for me because of the psychological distinction they were abel to establish and make. It actually incorporated my being total bottom and was really hot. 

[blackrobe]

54 minutes ago, find91 said:

I suspect he covers up his cock because he don't want to be harassed to top

This. I kept getting asked for a picture of my hard cock, so I took one. It's an average sized cock, nothing special, but guys seem to like how it looks. Since I put it in my profiles I've found the number of versatile men trying to convince me I'm actually versatile and I need to fuck them, and bottoms wheedling me to try topping them has gone through the roof. My primary sex organs are my cunt and my brain, and no amount of guilting, shaming, and cajoling is going to change how I'm wired. 

[Guest FinalDL2021]

On ‎11‎/‎18‎/‎2017 at 6:23 PM, Cumfilledbottomboi said:

Of course I stay soft. I am focused on my tops. It is why I also stay in jocks. And wear thongs. 

Once by accident, fairly recently, I hit the Poppers too hard and stayed soft for the rest of the evening, with my FB. He said that he didn't mind, and actually preferred it that way, I was perplexed. In the Hetero-world, ED is a disaster, and I made sure it never happened with a women.  When he started to fuck me, I thought it was an interesting sensation and experience, having my dick out of the way, and my focus on his orgasm instead of mine; I even found it to be a different kind of turn on. I find myself slowly taking an interest in this, and even contemplating getting a chastity & key device for my cock.

[blackrobe]

4 minutes ago, Futile2Resist said:

Once by accident, fairly recently, I hit the Poppers too hard and stayed soft for the rest of the evening, with my FB. He said that he didn't mind, and actually preferred it that way, I was perplexed. In the Hetero-world, ED is a disaster, and I made sure it never happened with a women.  When he started to fuck me, I thought it was an interesting sensation and experience, having my dick out of the way, and my focus on his orgasm instead of mine; I even found it to be a different kind of turn on. I find myself slowly taking an interest in this, and even contemplating getting a chastity & key device for my cock.

You'll find it pretty damned interesting. When you get to buying a long term chastity cage, we should talk. I've done a lot of research. My dom top friend doesn't care about my dick, except that he likes I'm soft and leaking like a whore as he's deep dicking my cunt. 

[tallslenderguy]

5 minutes ago, Futile2Resist said:

Once by accident, fairly recently, I hit the Poppers too hard and stayed soft for the rest of the evening, with my FB. He said that he didn't mind, and actually preferred it that way, I was perplexed. In the Hetero-world, ED is a disaster, and I made sure it never happened with a women.  When he started to fuck me, I thought it was an interesting sensation and experience, having my dick out of the way, and my focus on his orgasm instead of mine; I even found it to be a different kind of turn on. I find myself slowly taking an interest in this, and even contemplating getting a chastity & key device for my cock.

i don’t know if it’s evolution or discovery of what is already there, but your story is familiar to me. I knew I like guys from an early age, but conformed to my cultural upbringing, married a woman and stayed married 31 years. We had sex that entire time and getting hard was never an issue. I was 6 years married before my first experience with a guy, and it was like being unleashed, instant slut. Sex was versatile, I honestly didn’t think of labeling myself “top” or “bottom” or versatile. After divorce and having the freedom to be who i am, i’ve increasingly discovered an internal bottom.

[Guest Descartes70817]

I've fucked guys who got hard and came hands free, and while they are the best fucks I ever had I really don't mind if you stay soft and don't cum. What turns me on is how much you want my cock and cum inside your cunt. I realised that a bottom enjoys my cumming inside him at least as much, if not more, than I do.

[tallslenderguy]

^^this^^. Top and bottom, yin and Yang, has always been. I think our deepest experiences are in response and discovery of our nature 

Edited November 7, 2019 by tallslenderguy

[Guest Descartes70817]

11 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

^^this^^. Top and bottom, yin and Yang, has always been. I think our deepest experiences are in response and discovery of our nature 

It certainly felt that way the first time I fucked another guy at college. He invited me to sleep over after a concert, since he lived close by and I had a 3 mile walk ahead of me. His bedroom was over his parents detached garage so we wouldn't disturb them, but he only had one (queen size) bed that we would have to share. Single I'd only ever slept in a narrow single bed before there was plenty of room and I fell asleep quite quickly - only to wake up a short while later because somehow I was moments away from cumming in my friend's mouth.

Edited November 7, 2019 by Descartes70817

[find91]

3 hours ago, blackrobe said:

This. I kept getting asked for a picture of my hard cock, so I took one. It's an average sized cock, nothing special, but guys seem to like how it looks. Since I put it in my profiles I've found the number of versatile men trying to convince me I'm actually versatile and I need to fuck them, and bottoms wheedling me to try topping them has gone through the roof. My primary sex organs are my cunt and my brain, and no amount of guilting, shaming, and cajoling is going to change how I'm wired. 

Good no one should be pressured into a role. New a buddy who his boyfriend would force him to top him because he was more hung. He hated it, but did it because he loved him. 

Seen the opposite as well where the top forces the bottom to coverup and wear a jock because he was more hung. 

Stop shaming people

Rant over

Sorry back to the convo

[garsento]

I make no sweeping statements apartment from preferring what works in the moment for everyone involved.

[tallslenderguy]

57 minutes ago, find91 said:

Good no one should be pressured into a role. New a buddy who his boyfriend would force him to top him because he was more hung. He hated it, but did it because he loved him. 

Seen the opposite as well where the top forces the bottom to coverup and wear a jock because he was more hung. 

Stop shaming people

Rant over

Sorry back to the convo

As i've evolved, i've become more and more an advocate for sexual compatability as a foundation for relationship.  Actual practical knowledge of our sexual needs/desires, and consideration of those when looking for a mate. i lived in a marriage (to a woman) for 31 years, and though i loved her deeply, it was torture.  Of course, i'm gay, so that complicated it lol, but we also both had sub natures and were both bottoms.  my best sex has always been with total or primarily Tops, usually with some Dom mixed in.  Sex with versatile or bottom guys has been quid pro quo, and i think that is a recipe for failure... especially long term.  i have known bottoms and versatile guys who i love dearly, but i generally keep i platonic (unless the versatile guy is feeling top at the time), because i hate being in the position of obligatory or quid pro quo sex. To me, that really ruins the connection. i think it's a law of nature that opposites attract. Of course, we're more complex than charged ions, but i think our complexities can enhance the attraction and bond we experience. i wish more guys were interested in the mental and emotional aspects of sex.

Re "shaming."  i get what you mean here i think, but there's also a mysterious type of, idk, shaming or humiliation that can be intensely sexy and feed something in both the giver and receiver.  i always refer to it as "affectionate humiliation."  Even though i know there are guys who get off on rough, bullying, etc., forms of this, for me it has to come from affection or in a matter of fact way to find my need and push that button.  There are Dom/Top guys who have told me that i don't have a cock.  Some have called it a "clit," others a penis etc., but they make the distinction between what they have and what i have and make clear that i don't have what they have.  It's all gets complex and there is a mysteriousness to it for me, but done 'right' it has the effect of bringing out a deeply submissive, warm and gratified feeling in me... and apparently, in Them too. Though various kinks can involve what looks and feels like 'shaming' and 'humiliation,' there are some that can be deeply  fulfilling on both sides. The trick, again, seems to be compatibility. 

[Cumfilledbottomboi]

8 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

As i've evolved, i've become more and more an advocate for sexual compatability as a foundation for relationship.  Actual practical knowledge of our sexual needs/desires, and consideration of those when looking for a mate. i lived in a marriage (to a woman) for 31 years, and though i loved her deeply, it was torture.  Of course, i'm gay, so that complicated it lol, but we also both had sub natures and were both bottoms.  my best sex has always been with total or primarily Tops, usually with some Dom mixed in.  Sex with versatile or bottom guys has been quid pro quo, and i think that is a recipe for failure... especially long term.  i have known bottoms and versatile guys who i love dearly, but i generally keep i platonic (unless the versatile guy is feeling top at the time), because i hate being in the position of obligatory or quid pro quo sex. To me, that really ruins the connection. i think it's a law of nature that opposites attract. Of course, we're more complex than charged ions, but i think our complexities can enhance the attraction and bond we experience. i wish more guys were interested in the mental and emotional aspects of sex.

Re "shaming."  i get what you mean here i think, but there's also a mysterious type of, idk, shaming or humiliation that can be intensely sexy and feed something in both the giver and receiver.  i always refer to it as "affectionate humiliation."  Even though i know there are guys who get off on rough, bullying, etc., forms of this, for me it has to come from affection or in a matter of fact way to find my need and push that button.  There are Dom/Top guys who have told me that i don't have a cock.  Some have called it a "clit," others a penis etc., but they make the distinction between what they have and what i have and make clear that i don't have what they have.  It's all gets complex and there is a mysteriousness to it for me, but done 'right' it has the effect of bringing out a deeply submissive, warm and gratified feeling in me... and apparently, in Them too. Though various kinks can involve what looks and feels like 'shaming' and 'humiliation,' there are some that can be deeply  fulfilling on both sides. The trick, again, seems to be compatibility. 

I’m submissive and I know it and don’t even generally like to play with verse guys unless they know I’m the bottom. I have no desire to top and leak precum like a pussyboi in heat when being bred. Always have but I’ve never been hard while being fucked.

[Guest FinalDL2021]

20 hours ago, blackrobe said:

You'll find it pretty damned interesting. When you get to buying a long term chastity cage, we should talk. I've done a lot of research. My dom top friend doesn't care about my dick, except that he likes I'm soft and leaking like a whore as he's deep dicking my cunt. 

I will send you an email. I would really like to know more about this fetish

[find91]

16 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

As i've evolved, i've become more and more an advocate for sexual compatability as a foundation for relationship.  Actual practical knowledge of our sexual needs/desires, and consideration of those when looking for a mate. i lived in a marriage (to a woman) for 31 years, and though i loved her deeply, it was torture.  Of course, i'm gay, so that complicated it lol, but we also both had sub natures and were both bottoms.  my best sex has always been with total or primarily Tops, usually with some Dom mixed in.  Sex with versatile or bottom guys has been quid pro quo, and i think that is a recipe for failure... especially long term.  i have known bottoms and versatile guys who i love dearly, but i generally keep i platonic (unless the versatile guy is feeling top at the time), because i hate being in the position of obligatory or quid pro quo sex. To me, that really ruins the connection. i think it's a law of nature that opposites attract. Of course, we're more complex than charged ions, but i think our complexities can enhance the attraction and bond we experience. i wish more guys were interested in the mental and emotional aspects of sex.

Re "shaming."  i get what you mean here i think, but there's also a mysterious type of, idk, shaming or humiliation that can be intensely sexy and feed something in both the giver and receiver.  i always refer to it as "affectionate humiliation."  Even though i know there are guys who get off on rough, bullying, etc., forms of this, for me it has to come from affection or in a matter of fact way to find my need and push that button.  There are Dom/Top guys who have told me that i don't have a cock.  Some have called it a "clit," others a penis etc., but they make the distinction between what they have and what i have and make clear that i don't have what they have.  It's all gets complex and there is a mysteriousness to it for me, but done 'right' it has the effect of bringing out a deeply submissive, warm and gratified feeling in me... and apparently, in Them too. Though various kinks can involve what looks and feels like 'shaming' and 'humiliation,' there are some that can be deeply  fulfilling on both sides. The trick, again, seems to be compatibility. 

Ya it was a bit difficult to explain the shaming part because like you I like Dom/ sub dynamics and consentual shaming does have it's place. However, in that context the shame is a double edge sword because it can be uncomfortable and embarrassing but their is still a ring of truth and liberation. When you shame someone for who they are, it more of a prison.