What are some ideas to get more young guys into barebacking?

[HungLatinDom]

I think that you need to learn quite a bit more about HIV and AIDS before taking any decision, because it is obvious that you severe misconceptions about HIV.

HIV still kills people, however, with access to meds and medical care, your life expectancy is as good as the expectancy of an uninfected person.

http://www.spacedaily.com/reports/HIV_Life_Expectancy_Now_Normal_999.html

HIV is _not_ the same than AIDS. Not even close. You can be very healthy and still be positive.

An article I read a bit ago:

Still here, so sorry

“People are in such denial about how serious HIV is. Unfortunately, the best prevention is seeing people die.”

—Michael Weinstein, president of the AIDS Healthcare Foundation

By Andrew Sullivan

From The Advocate, July 5, 2005

I’m sorry. It has taken me a long time to say this, but it’s time: I’m sorry.

It’s been almost 12 years since I became infected with HIV, and I haven’t died yet. I haven’t even had the decency to get sick. I am a walking, talking advertisement for why HIV seems not such a big deal to the younger generation—and indeed, many in my own age bracket. I know this is a terrible thing, and I promise in the future to do better. As gay activist Michelangelo Signorile recently told The New York Times, “If everyone in your group is beautiful, taking steroids, barebacking, and HIV-positive, having the virus doesn’t seem like such a bad thing.”

I’m sorry. At the tender age of 41—a year longer than I once thought I would live—I have never felt better. HIV transformed my life, made me a better and braver writer, prompted me to write the first big book pushing marriage rights, got me to take better care of my health, improved my sex life, and deepened my spirituality.

I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better.

Yes, I take testosterone and human growth hormone, and I now weigh 190 pounds. I discovered a couple of abs in my midsection the other day. I’ll try to disguise them. Do they sell burkas online? I’ve even enjoyed sex more since I became positive—more depth, more intimacy, more appreciation of life itself. Sorry.

I look physically and mentally healthier than ever. Sorry again. I know that by just going daily to the gym, walking on the beach, or dancing at the occasional circuit party, I am the cause of more people getting infected with HIV. I have helped persuade them by my very existence that HIV isn’t such a curse, that it can be survived, that it can be treated effectively, that you can live well and long with HIV if you look after yourself and stay alert and informed. I’m sorry. I’m almost as bad as those damn drug ads showing people with HIV triumphing over adversity.

In the future I’ll try to look sicker. Or I’ll stay home more. Promise. I’ll try to get depressed. I won’t work out. I’ll stay off TV. I will never tell anyone that treatments are far less onerous than they used to be (and I went through medication hell for several years in the 1990s). I’ll even repeat the lie that HIV transmission rates are exploding because of people like me, even though the latest solid data show HIV rates to be stabilizing or even declining in many cities. (A decline in infection rates in New York City last year! Sorry again.

I shouldn’t have told you that. It will make you less scared.) If all else fails, I’ll tell people I may have gotten “super-AIDS,” an old, extremely rare, now debunked viral strain that is being successfully treated in one gay man in New York City. Promise.

I’d even be prepared to stop taking my meds if that would help. The trouble is, like many other people with HIV, I did that three years ago. My CD4 count remained virtually unchanged, and only recently have I had to go back on meds. Five pills once a day. No side effects to speak of. I know that others go through far worse, and I don’t mean to minimize their trials. But the bottom line is that HIV is fast becoming another diabetes.

You can see the symptoms. Far fewer gay men are dying of AIDS anymore. Sometimes local gay papers have no AIDS obits for weeks on end. C’mon, pozzies. You can do better than that!

Do you have no sense of social responsibility? Young negative men need to see more of us keeling over in the streets, or they won’t be scared enough to avoid a disease that may, in the very distant future, kill them off. You know, like any number of other diseases might. They may even stop believing that this is a huge, escalating crisis, threatening to wipe out homosexual life on this planet.

What are those happy HIV-positive men thinking of? Die, damn it.

Of course, we could always be thrilled that so many people are living longer and better lives with HIV. We could celebrate our reclaiming of sexuality after years of terror. We could even try new strategies for risk reduction among gay men—strategies that emphasize positive ways to care for our health rather than negative ways to scare the bejeezus out of everyone. But then we’d have no more people to scapegoat and blame, would we?

This forum is full of poz guys, like myself. Some of us were looking for the gift, others got it and made the best out of our lives, like Sullivan. I got a wonderful piggy partner, a masculine, muscular dad who has been positive for 20 years. He helped me to go through this and made me realize of many thing about my life and future. Now I got a great job and the future is looking bright. There are negative things, certainly, but they are manageable in my case.

I think you would a big favor to yourself if, instead of stating so bluntly your misconceptions in front of experts in the subject (And this is an advice valid for many things besides HIV), you would learn from them and make an informed choice.

[bbbtm20]

splitface said what I was trying to say, only he did it in a more constructive fashion.

Young gay guys like us don't have mentors who honestly care about/respect our well-being...at least not on this site. When we ask legitimate questions about bareback sex, all we get from a lot of you veterans is the more-fun half of the truth. Why won't you talk about the downside? A lot of us are scared and conflicted about bareback sex. We see the porn, we want to try it and we hear you guys talk about how freeing it is to fuck raw and how 100% wonderful being poz is...but we know that's not the whole story. We need an honest dialogue with honest and unbiased men who will speak the whole truth about what barebacking entails and how being poz will alter our young lives. Some of you talk about what being poz is really like but it feels like the majority of this site is dedicated to sexual gratification, not dialogue.

...but I guess this is the last place a confused young man should look for those kind of answers.

Edited March 23, 2011 by bbbtm20

[topdad]

Your question makes me wonder: Are you on a mission of some sort? Is this a crusade, an ideology, a philosophy - and what are you ultimately trying to achieve? Just asking.

[rawTOP]

Your question makes me wonder: Are you on a mission of some sort? Is this a crusade, an ideology, a philosophy - and what are you ultimately trying to achieve? Just asking.

This site encourages guys to bareback. It's one of many voices and points of view on the Internet. The whole concept of the site is to let guys who bareback share their experiences and let guys who are thinking about barebacking ask questions and see into the lives of guys who do bareback. We don't shy away from the negatives - hell when a good thread of problems comes along I sticky it so people see both sides.

I think I'll start a poll - "do you wish you had started barebacking earlier?" I'm guessing the response will be overwhelmingly 'yes'... That's the point of this thread... How do we get young guys to bareback sooner? Since down the road they'll be glad they did...

[splitface]

I think that you need to learn quite a bit more about HIV and AIDS before taking any decision, because it is obvious that you severe misconceptions about HIV.

HIV still kills people, however, with access to meds and medical care, your life expectancy is as good as the expectancy of an uninfected person.

http://www.spacedaily.com/reports/HIV_Life_Expectancy_Now_Normal_999.html

HIV is _not_ the same than AIDS. Not even close. You can be very healthy and still be positive.

An article I read a bit ago:

This forum is full of poz guys, like myself, some of us were looking for the gift, others got it and made the best out of our lives, like Sullivan. I got a wonderful piggy partner, a masculine, muscular dad who has been positive for 20 years. He helped me to go through this and made me realize of many thing about my life and future. Now I got a great job and the future is looking bright. There are negative things, certainly, but they are manageable in my case.

I think you would a big favor to yourself if, instead of stating so bluntly your misconceptions in front of experts in the subject (And this is an advice valid for many things besides HIV), you would learn from them and make an informed choice.

That was a very interesting article. And your post is very informative.

I guess I'm just scared. Also, sorry, as I didn't mean to come across as a little punk (as I think I may have) who knows more than the other members of this community.

As bbbtm20 said, there is also a lack of brutal honesty. I would like to see poz guys share their stories, their information, not just the fun half of the truth. I often see and hear guys talking about how being poz is great because they get to convert neg guys, and all of the other great points, but you don't very often here about the bad points with full disclosure.

Can I ask you about the negative aspects you mentioned, and more importantly, why you consider them manageable?

[HungLatinDom]

Splitface: I do not want to disrupt this thread with OTs, so I have started a new thread here:

http://breeding.zone/threads/8071-Brutal-Honesty-In-More-Than-One-Way?p=18955

[VersAlwaysLooking]

Bareback is an individual choice and shouldn't be marketed, IMO. With that said, there is certainly a large % mainstream young guys who play bare at least sometimes but would not classify themselves as barebackers. I probably fit in that category in the eyes of some here. My preferred method of finding a bottom is picking up a guy in a bar or some other public place. You'd be amazed -- 50% of the time, he'll just bend over with no mention of a condom, as for the other 50%, half will let you in with a promise to pull out. BBRT, Craigslist, etc. are a last resort.

[dirty_lad]

I'm 19. I started barebacking three years ago, what influenced me was the bb porn, I then barebacked once with an older man when I was 16, I'd been fucking long before this though, from that point on it was addictive and now I've only used a rubber in situations where he is really hot and won't bb. For me, I considered myself a barebacker and part of the bb community soon after I started probably because of the porn I had and I have some contacts online who I talked about bb a lot with. A lot of my friends my age don't use rubbers either but don't consider themselves barebackers. What we need is some sort of site, where hot young guys can hook up bareback, a site which emphasizes the bareback community and a sense of being only part of it when one considers themselves a barebacker, where they can chat to other barebackers, I think the chatting to other barebackers definitely made me feel part of it and definitely think it will sway young guys

[Achilles765]

I know from my experience people my age and younger for the most part just kinda do whatever happens. I can count on one hand the number of guys around my age who even mention a condom. And frankly, there really is not alot of bareback marketing targeting out group, Most bb porn is of more manly and older guy with a few exceptions. That could help. More twink bb porn. And a concerted effort to downplay HIV. Cause that is one thing I know some of my friends are just terrified of.

[cumslutfordaddy]

That's the point of this thread... How do we get young guys to bareback sooner?

When I read shit like this, it makes me think this website is subsidized by the pharmaceutical industry.

Essentially, what you're saying is. "How do we make young impressionable gay guys follow our dogma that HIV is not a serious deal"

[TattPig]

This guy (cumslutfordaddy) is typing with one hand and stringing you along. Be very, very careful.

He joined 2 days ago, has an empty profile and created 2 threads. This one is titled "What are some ideas to get more young guys into barebacking?" and now he posts in his own thread..."When I read shit like this, it makes me think this website is subsidized by the pharmaceutical industry. Essentially, what you're saying is. "How do we make young impressionable gay guys follow our dogma that HIV is not a serious deal" ".

In his only other thread (the rambling "Hello guys") he says "...just genuinely considering the idea of never dating again after finding out about the whole concept of big chasers and gift givers." And he wants to know about the penis size of young guys who bottom!

Seriously. Stop feeding the troll.

Edited March 30, 2013 by TattPig

[cumslutfordaddy]

Well actually, if you LOOK at the original poster, you would see that it was a guy named rawtop, and not me.

I've only made one thread so far. So like sorry about your reading comprehension skills, is that a symptom of HIV?

[smartstud2010]

WELL SAID. I agree that the tenor of this thread isn't thinking of young people's sexual well-being. I get that you're approaching this question (of getting young guys into barebacking) from a marketing point of view, but...I think the best thing for everyone is to educate young people so they can make an informed decision.

This whole thread is in poor taste. The way you worded the original question is unsettling, as are the many ethically-unsound responses here. There's a very, very fine line between being sexually uninhibited and being a sexual predator. You guys are crossing that line with impunity and it's degrading the site. Having sex, whether safe or bareback, is a personal choice and not something you should attempt to sway for your own benefit. Trying to manipulate impressionable young minds into having the kind of sex you think they should be having is an appalling abuse of your status as adult gay men. This thread makes NO mention of educating guys about the risks of barebacking, nor does it mention the very real consequences of it. Instead, there are jokes about how best to bribe young guys into taking a very grave risk with their health, all so this site can be better marketed and the older men on here can maybe get laid. You guys should be ashamed of yourselves.

RawTOP, you need to realize that you aren't running a regular website here, but one that deals with potentially life-altering sex acts. Bareback sex is not just sex. It is a very risky act that carries very serious, sometimes fatal, consequences. Young gay men need to understand that, they need to make an informed decision about their sex lives and you guys need to stay out of it. Young people know how to use the Internet better than you do. They will find you if they want to. Preying on the fears and ignorance of young gay men may get you laid by cute boys and it may increase traffic on this site, but you're still manipulating others to get what you want. That makes you predators, which is the last thing young gay men need.

[rawcardiff1991]

I'm 21 and have been having bb sex since a very young age. As a bottom I don't mind of the top wants to wear a condom and have safer sex, but I don't mention a condom if they don't. Most young guys have no desire to wear a condom and I can count on one hand the number of people who have insisted on using one. As a bottom the risk is predominantly mine.

[neg4poztop]

Actually I think a lot more younger guys bareback now than when I was young..especially with the more effective hiv meds and the barebacking on porn sites,,,its hugely popular..like on xtube for instance,it seems like no one even wants to watch your amateur fuck video unless you're barebacking..its in high demand that's for sure...so I think they'll do it for different reasons