Mental health during COVID

[cheatingjock]

I have always struggled with depression and anxiety but the last year has been really bad. Anyone else having major issues? 

[bareback-flipflop]

TBH I am mentally strong person, I rarely have anxiety or bad thoughts, and any symptoms of depression. However atvthe end of the first period of the pandemic (last june) it was getting hard. But after a year I see that my personality has changed. I feel anxious more times, bad thoughts also come more often.  And which is very spectacular, I, who is an open minded and very tolerant person even more often have impatient reactions, become faster angry, etc. I’m sure this is because of COVID. 

[cub84]

Yup. Same, this year has definitely been one of the worst for me. It’s really difficult to describe the what/how of it too; my depression/anxiety has always felt more like an unclear fog than anything that’s the product of specific triggers, but right now it feels like I’m stuck in the middle of some of the thickest fog I’ve ever experienced, not only do I feel lost in it but I also don’t feel sure there’s any way of thinning the fog or navigating a way to a thinner part of it.

[Guest]

Cheatingjock I can relate. Some of the isolation and lack of social interactions has been hard. I'm naturally more introverted but I do need to have those interactions on a regular basis

[BadInBrooklyn]

I"m kind of having the opposite problem.  The past year hasn't been too bad mostly because I have a really good living situation and a job it's really easy to do from home.  But now I'm getting really stressed out at the thought of going back to things like leaving the house every day, shaving, getting a haircut, wearing shoes...

I used to have a life, and I want that back, but being around other people all the time is going to be difficult.

On the other hand, it's been so long since I've had sex, that once I do get out there this cock is going into the first hole it sees.  And the second, and the third...

[bznp]

All the best — the worst is over 😌

[iman2004]

mental health been a bit of a disaster. I'm hanging in courtesy of some great friends.

Sex? No, sorry, forgotten that.....

[BlackDude]

I’m actually a bit of a loner so this has been a dream come true for me. I do t miss the commute, going into the office, the social commitments. The only thing I miss is the gym.

 

Sex has been wack for the most part, but if I really wanted it I could get it.

[SpectreAgent]

It’s been the reverse for me. In fact, I’ve rather enjoyed lockdown. No more making spurious excuses for avoiding social events/invitations I don’t really want to go to, for starters. As I’m inherently self-sufficient, working on my own has allowed me to focus on what really matters in my life and career.  And I’ve still been hooking up, but differently - with a small number of trusted fuckbuds in a bbubble - so that side of life has been fine. 

If anything, I would say I’m emerging from the pandemic mentally stronger and healthier. 

Edited April 21, 2021 by RawPlug
Typo

[AirmaxUK]

The lockdown in and of itself wasn't so bad - it forced some things like being able to work from home which otherwise wouldn't have happened. The early days were quite anxious and I remember the moment I read the scientific paper with the modelling that suggested lockdown was going to be a matter of months, not days or weeks. 

But lockdown brought a confluence of other issues with it. My mother received a diagnosis for pancreatic cancer a week before lockdown and was stuck in hospital and we were unable to visit. Various treatment options were off the table "because of covid" and even getting simple things done like getting a dressing changed or access to supplies was an utter nightmare. It wasn't until a year later and after involving her local MP that we have access to the right services, care, supplies and advice. It seems like "Covid" was a universal excuse for everything - I could write a book about what we've been through but honestly some of it was so ridiculous nobody would believe it.  At least fighting for her has given me some focus outside of work. Caring for an older person who has a vulnerable illness meant that I had to be more careful than most with regard to contact with other people. 

Work has been ok.  We have seen good demand throughout and actually revenue was up just shy of 5% despite the covid year. I get to work a mix of 60% at home and 40% on-site. It is interesting to see that some people have really gone the extra mile through the pandemic and others have slacked and hidden behind the pandemic using it as an excuse why something can't be done rather than find creative solutions.  

My partner is 100% at home since Jan 2020 and that has affected him quite badly. That's beginning to change a bit now he can get out and go to the gym.

Outside work, motivation has been low for us both. That is a struggle to get over.  You read about people using their time to learn a new language or something, but I can't imagine that. All the things I enjoy - going out, meeting guys, motorcycling, travelling, photography have been curtailed by being locked down. 

Eating and drinking has been a coping mechanism - we've both put on weight which is now a focus to try and reverse. But on hard days it's easy to be bad... and there's not a lot of other ways to blow off steam right now. 

I'm thankful for my PT who has been a constant force of positivity and being able to exercise with him even over Zoom has been great. 

So... its been a mixed bag.  I am sure it would have been worse if we were furloughed or out of work as well. 

[PigBoyDallas]

It’s been a tough year. I’m an extrovert and miss the social interaction. The fear and paranoia of getting Covid and what might happen has been mentally exhausting. Having to carry on in the face of all that has been exhausting as well. There’s not going to be some “magic moment” where it’s suddenly all over and things can be as they once were...that’s not reality. Some people got lucky and didn’t have close relatives and loved one die of it...count your blessings. I wasn’t so lucky. I’ve had close relatives and friends who got very sick and who died. That leaves a hole in your life and scars that don’t so easily heal. I’m not sure what I want the post-Covid world to be like, but I know it won’t be as it once was.

[SpectreAgent]

6 hours ago, AirmaxAndy said:

The lockdown in and of itself wasn't so bad - it forced some things like being able to work from home which otherwise wouldn't have happened. The early days were quite anxious and I remember the moment I read the scientific paper with the modelling that suggested lockdown was going to be a matter of months, not days or weeks. 

But lockdown brought a confluence of other issues with it. My mother received a diagnosis for pancreatic cancer a week before lockdown and was stuck in hospital and we were unable to visit. Various treatment options were off the table "because of covid" and even getting simple things done like getting a dressing changed or access to supplies was an utter nightmare. It wasn't until a year later and after involving her local MP that we have access to the right services, care, supplies and advice. It seems like "Covid" was a universal excuse for everything - I could write a book about what we've been through but honestly some of it was so ridiculous nobody would believe it.  At least fighting for her has given me some focus outside of work. Caring for an older person who has a vulnerable illness meant that I had to be more careful than most with regard to contact with other people. 

Work has been ok.  We have seen good demand throughout and actually revenue was up just shy of 5% despite the covid year. I get to work a mix of 60% at home and 40% on-site. It is interesting to see that some people have really gone the extra mile through the pandemic and others have slacked and hidden behind the pandemic using it as an excuse why something can't be done rather than find creative solutions.  

My partner is 100% at home since Jan 2020 and that has affected him quite badly. That's beginning to change a bit now he can get out and go to the gym.

Outside work, motivation has been low for us both. That is a struggle to get over.  You read about people using their time to learn a new language or something, but I can't imagine that. All the things I enjoy - going out, meeting guys, motorcycling, travelling, photography have been curtailed by being locked down. 

Eating and drinking has been a coping mechanism - we've both put on weight which is now a focus to try and reverse. But on hard days it's easy to be bad... and there's not a lot of other ways to blow off steam right now. 

I'm thankful for my PT who has been a constant force of positivity and being able to exercise with him even over Zoom has been great. 

So... its been a mixed bag.  I am sure it would have been worse if we were furloughed or out of work as well. 

I think your post illustrates how everyone’s journey through this has been very personal and different. I was furloughed on full pay for four months. The weather was great and I have a huge garden. I set about an exercise regime and started writing things that my paid writing job didn’t ever allow time for. By the end of the summer, everyone commented that I was looking more relaxed, fitter and tanned than they’d ever seen me. I certainly felt happier. After World War II, some people were considered to have had “a good war”. I think some of us in the coming months and years will be thought to have had a good pandemic.

I know this hasn’t been the case for everyone, perhaps the majority. I am very, very fortunate that none of my loved ones or myself caught the damned thing. God knows, I’m not a COVID denier, especially having survived a really nasty bout of Swine Flu back when that was a thing. But having spent 30 years working in the media in various roles, I also didn’t allow myself to be terrified by whipped up hysteria from newspapers and TV stations trying to generate clicks for their websites. Nothing sells papers or TV shows like grief porn - that’s the basic tenet of journalism. It’s cynical of them, but they’re in the business of making money.

Such is my laid back attitude to life that I have been very relaxed, even gung ho, about the pandemic (you know this to be true, Andy). Possibly too much. But there it is. However,  there’s a marvellous saying that I’ve always lived my life by: “I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I’ll use my time.” It’s certainly how I’ve got through the past 12 months.

Edited April 22, 2021 by RawPlug
Typo

[DarkroomTaker]

I missed the touch, yes sex, but the actual touch of another person, hugs, kisses even, but the physical touch of a human being.

I was fortunate in the role I am in, working from home, i hated, i hate having an office in my home, people on skype, internet breakdown. Managing dispersed teams remotely had its drawbacks and employers can take advantage and think you can be available all times, so I was working more hours less breaks. Neighbours screaming, kids crying etc and  that raised anxieties.

It developed on Zoom, Skype that I started to hide behind not showing my face, I became paronoid of seeing myself and becoming critical of my appearance, putting weight on, longer hair, just looked different.

Trying to sort my elderly parent with doctors, who were closed, busy phones, stressfull times.

Felt like I was losing sex drive, wanking even phased out.

I feel that Covid was used as excuses for lack of services, cock ups to some degree, which annoyed me as I was seeing patients, hospitals etc,

I feel I have changed, my outlook is different, I seem to worry more, paranoia and bizarre dreams or not sleeping and  scarey thoughts, i became more irritable, short tempered and being a Twat at times.

Anyway, lets see what the future brings, but Covid has left its Mark, sad to say.

[Guest]

It's been tough. Right before the lockdown I was at the end of a very long and exhausting project that took one year of work, mostly from home, and I was looking forward to a nice holiday as the reward...you know what happened next, pretty much another whole year of being stuck home. All that work and no reward, it felt so unfair. My sector of employment has also been completely wiped away too, so there's also the financial situation looking rough to say the least.

Then at some point something clicked and I realized I had to make something good out of this, if anything to have something to do. Building a small home gym, starting working out, taking online university classes to enrich my CV and keeping in touch with acquaintances and friends, both in real life and from gay hook-up sites.

Sorry to say that the latter has been the most disappointing part, a good 90% of people I was in contact with disappeared. I can't really blame them, as I know myself these are tough times that force people to change their life priorities, but it really makes you think when someone you've been in touch for a year or more just either disappears, stops answering or never makes the effort to write a word if you're not the one starting the conversation.

Anyway my mood is surprisingly good considering the situation we're in. Now if karma or whatever could bring me just one dick.

Edit: I agree with the above poster about the disgusting behavior of media and the press. Not a denialist, not a moron, just appalled at how this tragedy became a giant reality tv show for fame-hungry journalists and doctors. 

Edited April 22, 2021 by bluewind

[bznp]

Best wishes