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Is being sexually active right now worth it or a bad idea? 


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I'm not that sure we can make the charge of institutional homophobia stick (as opposed to institutional racism) because frankly this is getting a lot more attention and resources now than at any time since it was first observed in 1970,, since it has mostly remained in Central Africa during that time. Still a lot of confusion around how it spreads: it has probably mutated in such a way as to make it more transmissible through sexual contact (hence its takeoff and then the ways in which it has spread over the past few months) but there are definitely women getting it who claim no sexual exposure so it's far from definitively understood.

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I would rather be safe than sorry.  I am still getting calls from those who do not appear to watch television or follow the news closely.  One FWB said, "oh come on, there's not that many cases where where we live, that's happening in south Florida, not here.  I politely said "no, give me a call in a few weeks". I have known and played with this guy for years and I am baffled he isn't taking the situation seriously.

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It’s just not worth it for me right now. I don’t want monkeypox, and I don’t want to transmit it we’re I to catch it. So I’m sitting it out until shit gets more under control. 
 

Sounds like OP may have a different situation. I’ve done everything he listed. I’ve been an uninhibited slut for more than 20 years, and there are VERY few things I haven’t done at least twice. 

I may know what I’m missing by sitting it out at the moment, but I’ve had the experiences and fulfilled much of my sexual bucket list. OP — I can imagine how frustrating it is to be ready to explore the world of sex (literally and figuratively) and wonder if it will mean contracting a potentially dangerous disease that will adversely impact your life.  

I don’t know if you can wait, but if you can, I would. If you can’t wait, I would at least make sure you get vaccinated for monkeypox (if possible) and I’d also suggest Hep vax if you don’t already have it. I don’t recall if your poz or not. If you’re not and you care to stay that way, I’d get on Prep too. 

I genuinely hope you have an opportunity to enjoy all the incredible sexual adventures you seek. Embrace your inner slut and live your best life. 

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For those who are just now trying to let their inner pig/slut whatever emerge,  to explore what they have been missing or avoiding for the 1st period of their sexual life- I have to ask. You have waited and tempered your urges to this point. And yes, you are , in your head, finally ready to dive in head first and live in a pool of wanton sex and casual hook ups. But like diving off a rocky cliff into the water below at low tide - you run some big risks. Diving into the darkroom today , you have all the "old" risks from the menu board of STI's, to HIV,,Covid, Hep A,meningitis,  and the newest boulder in the sex pool- monkeypox. All but monkeypox are pretty much widespread and entrenched- some have treatments, some have preventatives. But monkeypox is the ONE virus that we, as a group, could actually make a huge impact on right now with a little patience and a 3 or 4 week break from the sex merry go round. But to get everyone, collectively, to hit pause on their penis for 4 weeks seems like an impossible ask. So pox will spread, a lot of guys will be in agony as the blisters form on their anus or inside their mouth or on their urethra, irritated and sending shooting pain with any touch or movement. And at that point they will , hopefully, regret taking undue risks  in dark rooms, on park trails at night with no idea of the guy fucking with them or what their skin looks like.

So you have held off acting on your cravings- why wouldn't you use that same self control just a little longer. This is really NOT the best time to begin . Just ask yourself if your 1st experience in wild pig sex gave you huge, blistering red spots that had you screaming in pain is really how you want to step into the scene? Do you want to end up with scarring on your body, around your cock and balls, that will be the first thing noticed when you go to a pool party in a year, or to a nude beach? A couple of you are 30- prime meat so to speak in the gay arena. What do you think your self confidence will be if you have big scars on your face from a night at the baths. What will it mean to your ability to get a good job and get promotions? In a year, you will still be the "hot meat", and hopefully scar free and in demand.  Hold off, for now. You have made it this far, don't let the urge give you a scourge.

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On 8/13/2022 at 9:57 PM, kinkyosito said:

So I finally have reached a point in my life where I can afford to travel. Now I want to be able to have fun sexual adventures. I have recently accepted how much of a kinky person I am and I want to do all the things I have fantasized of doing. A few of those things being visiting bathhouses, going to a fetish/kink event, attending themed weekends and general having lots of hot and uninhibited sex.

Unfortunately, my sexual enlightenment is happening at a time where there is a serious risk of contracting monkeypox and I feel like I shouldn’t be doing anything mentioned above.  I know that despite taking precautions like prep and condoms, things can still happen even if monkeypox wasn’t going around. I know at the end of the day its my decision, I just want to be sure I know what the risks are if any.

People have compared monkeypox to the last sexual health crisis the gay community experienced. For context I’m under 30 and can’t accurately compare what happened then and now but I have educated myself on what happened and I can’t help but feel anxious about this. This question is for the generation who lived through the AIDS epidemic. I’m just an anxious millennial who wants to be safe, healthy, and have fun.

 

TLDR: I want to have lots of sex everywhere and with anyone but monkeypox has me anxious to even consider planning anything anywhere. I want advice on the current situation 

 

Let's call things what they are;
You are referring to the AIDS-pandemic and although here in the First world (Europe, Northern America and Oceania) we have acces to effective treatments - though not a cure or a vaccine - it still is a pandemic with devastating effects on those of us in Africa and other parts of the world that are not so lucky to have acces to effective health-care.

I'm going on 50 y/o and when I started maturing sexually, during puberty, HIV and AIDS were a death-sentence with the prospect of great suffering before the end and carrying a stigma (slightly) more than it has nowadays.
Even since after effective treatments became available in second part of the nineties I wasn't able to shed the sense of dread and doom connected with sex. And at times I still experience the sensation.

PrEP has the potential to be the game-changer when it concerns HIV and Aids. I'm glad to see you are aware of it's existence, and if you aren't already on it I'd fatherly advise you to talk to your general practitioner / primary cary physician or (local / sexual) health clinic about starting.

Then recently we had a world-wide outbreak of Covid-19 and probably because the pre-existing HIV-Pandemic it has a broader and higher range of infecting also effecting White, Western, Heterosexual and Rich people immense funds were maid available to develop vaccines and protect the general population. 
I've continued having uninhibited sex with multiple partners during this time and got my two vaccinations and booster-shot in the mean-time. I caught Covid-19 after the booster btw.

And now Monkeypox..
Honeybun...
If I let it - this could make me feel old and tired. Not again for fucks-sake. Perhaps in your eyes or other guys your age or younger than you I even may be old. Being called 'Dad' more and more. might be a hint. But thank the heavens for the pandemic of daddy-issues. 😎

I am NOT going to advise you either way. You are right it is your choice, your life and nobody else's. Whatever you decide it's ok and you have posted a serious dilemma so your not a bad person and you are thinking things through and have your doubts.
Good!
People who never doubt, never think.

My younger years weren't very happy, to put it mildly. I have learned through pain and suffering that in most cases - though not all - we have a choice in how to deal with when life happens. And I have made the choice when in doubt - I'd rather regret my actions than my inactions. 
When I was your age I feel I put off experimenting and enjoying sex outside of a committed relationship because of fear.

Where I able to do things over again I would have started this much earlier and accepted the risk of becoming POZ even when it would have killed me.
Looking back not having been myself for too long when i was young, feels like a state of living death to me.

I am going to do what I have been doing during Covid-19 and before. This doesn't mean you have to and the opposite might even be true.

What I do wish for you that in between and while being a total pig sexually is that you will fall in love and have romantic experiences as well, including getting your heart broken once-in-while and breaking one or two yourself. (Just don't overdo it).
That too makes us human and I would almost go so far that'll make a man out of you. 

Let love rule. ❤️

 

9 hours ago, AlwaysOpen said:

For those who are just now trying to let their inner pig/slut whatever emerge,  to explore what they have been missing or avoiding for the 1st period of their sexual life- I have to ask. You have waited and tempered your urges to this point. And yes, you are , in your head, finally ready to dive in head first and live in a pool of wanton sex and casual hook ups. But like diving off a rocky cliff into the water below at low tide - you run some big risks. Diving into the darkroom today , you have all the "old" risks from the menu board of STI's, to HIV,,Covid, Hep A,meningitis,  and the newest boulder in the sex pool- monkeypox. All but monkeypox are pretty much widespread and entrenched- some have treatments, some have preventatives. But monkeypox is the ONE virus that we, as a group, could actually make a huge impact on right now with a little patience and a 3 or 4 week break from the sex merry go round. But to get everyone, collectively, to hit pause on their penis for 4 weeks seems like an impossible ask. So pox will spread, a lot of guys will be in agony as the blisters form on their anus or inside their mouth or on their urethra, irritated and sending shooting pain with any touch or movement. And at that point they will , hopefully, regret taking undue risks  in dark rooms, on park trails at night with no idea of the guy fucking with them or what their skin looks like.

So you have held off acting on your cravings- why wouldn't you use that same self control just a little longer. This is really NOT the best time to begin . Just ask yourself if your 1st experience in wild pig sex gave you huge, blistering red spots that had you screaming in pain is really how you want to step into the scene? Do you want to end up with scarring on your body, around your cock and balls, that will be the first thing noticed when you go to a pool party in a year, or to a nude beach? A couple of you are 30- prime meat so to speak in the gay arena. What do you think your self confidence will be if you have big scars on your face from a night at the baths. What will it mean to your ability to get a good job and get promotions? In a year, you will still be the "hot meat", and hopefully scar free and in demand.  Hold off, for now. You have made it this far, don't let the urge give you a scourge.

Perhaps you missed the part the OP shared that in the end it was his decision and although he asked the question I don't think he asked for advice but for input. And even if he did, I don't think it's helpful for people to think for themselves, when others want to do it for them like they where children in stead of responsible adults (in this case a man who hasn't turned 30 yet).

Comparing sex with 'diving of a rocky cliff into the water below at low tide' is way to harsh a comparison and sounds judgemental to my ears.

You predict that it will only take a 'little patience' and a mere '3 or 4 week break'.
Question:  On what is your prediction based?
There's a shortage of Monkey-pox vaccines, at least here in Western Europe where not every gay- and bisexual man has been invited to be vaccinated in The Netherlands.
There is only enough for people living with HIV, using PrEP and on registered waiting lists for PrEP.

Your referring to other people's love- and sex life as a 'sex merry go round' sounds derogative to me.
In that light I would have preferred you not calling this 'wild pig sex' as I'm unsure if you mean it without condemning certain sexual practices. 
The same goes for your choice of words: "30- prime meat so to speak in the gay arena".

Fear as a warning is a good thing, but one can overdo it and that's what I think you're doing when writing:

- "huge, blistering red spots that had you screaming in pain";
- "scarring on your body, around your cock and balls";
- "big scars on your face from a night at the baths";
and lastly:
- "What will it mean to your ability to get a good job and get promotions?".

 

I was recently tested for monkey-pox and the nurse administering the test was dressed in fully protecting clothing from head to toe. Which is of course a sensible precaution as she and her colleagues will probably come into contact with people infected with Monkey-ox a lot and because of this, they run a much higher risk of infection doing their job. I asked her about it, and read up and there is still much unknown about the route of infection of the virus and for instance if bodily fluids or breathing can transmit the virus and a more exact estimate of the risk-ratio in each way of transmission.

Some scars one earns in life are on the inside. And they often take much longer to heal and sometimes never go away.
One learns to use the pain and the scars as a source of strength if one's lucky and the road to achieve this is long and ongoing.

I've heard gay men saying they want the vaccine and indeed using some restraint in their sex lives for fear of being blamed for infecting people outside of the gay community...

Monkeypox originates in Africa, just like HIV.
And apparently now too it only becomes a problem when it threatens our rich, western, christian and mostly caucasian societies. Our medical science is even not sure about the transmissions or to what extend the Smallpox vaccine, will protect against Monkeypox.

 

This sounds like an outbreak of intolerance, bias and discrimination to me.

I will not have anyone try to terrorise the OP and his healthy young men's sex-drive, imagination, sense of adventure and desire for exploration - nor for being gay / bisexual - with the threat of being stigmatised, if that was your intention.

If it was your intention to help stop the spread of Monkeypox I suggest you invest the same amount of energy and much more in advocating for vaccines and cures for viral infections.
We can, as is shown by the eradication of smallpox.
There's enough money in the world, as is shown by the huge fortunes available to fight Covid-19.

 

Of course blaming people for their natural urges and life-style - especially when they differ from the majority or the privileged - is much easier, cheaper and although this never stops the problem people can enjoy a good night's sleep in their righteousness.

 

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Like so many other reasonable members here...I have "pumped the breaks" and put my inner slut on pause...at least until I get the vaccine. I am on a waitlist and trying to get moved up the line.

It's honestly about whatever risk you are comfortable taking, and whatever pain you're capable of enduring.

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On 8/15/2022 at 2:12 PM, FunCheerSlut said:

Like so many other reasonable members here...I have "pumped the breaks" and put my inner slut on pause...at least until I get the vaccine. I am on a waitlist and trying to get moved up the line.

It's honestly about whatever risk you are comfortable taking, and whatever pain you're capable of enduring.

I am just back from receiving my monkey-pox (or smallpox) vaccine. I was fortunate to answer my phone when they were calling to advise of a cancellation. Please consider protecting yourself and others!

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