Is there anyone who are still around after getting pozzed during the crisis in the 80s

[Ronchipig]

I was infected about 1976. That was 47 years ago.. I remember at first at  I was taking 40 pills a day. Now I take only 2 pills. I have been undetectable for 7 or 8 years.. I remember back in the 70s. Wondering if I would make it to the year 2000. I'm still here and very happy to be healthy and alive.

[wood]

On 12/12/2022 at 6:08 AM, NudistBBBLK said:

I have many older poz friends who were diagnosed in 80s and 90s and they often tell me it was a traumatic experience as friends and fuck buds died left and right & no one was doing anything about it & they themselves often left worried when their day will come. 
 

I remember when I decided to go raw in the early 2000s and how some of them gave me a stern warning not to do it. I took their advice in consideration but I felt if I became poz I would be ok as meds were good 

As can be searched through any of my posts I’ve done a lot of public heath outreach. 
 

however one of the most impactful events was a hookup with a guy who said he was 50, maybe 7 years ago. He was older but looked amazing and I didn’t care. The sex was fantastic. 
 

the conversation was incredible and heartbreaking. 
 

he has no one left from his group of dozens of friends. 
 

he’s the sole survivor. 
 

I think it takes actually hearing a survivors tale to realize how apocalyptic he aids crisis was. We look back now with prep, treatment, bug chasing, etc and think ehhh there’s a solution.  
 

for so long there wasn’t. Imagine seeing everyone you know die in the prime of their lives. 
 

We lost an entire generation of incredibly talented men and every time I think about it I can cry. 

[Guest]

Right here. I was around 20 and 55 now. Could’ve be even well before that.  Glad to be here. It’s one hell of a good FUCKING ride. Love being poz. 

[BradStevens]

On 5/17/2023 at 5:43 PM, BradStevens said:

It's important to explore WHY those of us who survived, did survive. In 1996 a doctor put me on AZT and after six months I felt sicker than I had ever felt in my life and had a metallic taste in my mouth at all time. To his chagrin I stopped told him that I couldn't continue to take medication and I believe that saved my life.

I feel I must follow up on this post.... in 2001 (five years after I fired my doctor) I got very sick and went to a new doctor at the urging of friends. It was determined that I had 33 T-cells. However, there were newer meds available which appeared to be working for people so I went on the first of a number of cocktails at that time and have remained on some sort of HIV cocktail since, with the exception of one self-prescribed drug holiday which was a really dumb idea and very nearly killed me. For most of the last 20 years I have maintained a Zero viral load and decent T-cells in the 300-400 range.

But I still believe the decision to stop AZT treatment in 1996 was the right one and attribute my survival to that choice.

Edited July 2, 2023 by BradStevens
grammar

[ellentonboy]

I have been as low as 12 T cells and lived to tell the tale.  I wasn't the most compliant patient and my doctor knew I slept around and did enhancements.  I had a viral load over 2 million on more than one occasion. I drove him nuts as I had an excuse as to why each medication was the wrong choice for me.

I am now on Descovy and Prescobix and have about 150 t-cells and no viral load.  I hold my breath each time I have a lab drawn (tomorrow-yuck) because I fear becoming resistant.    

If you can name an anti-viral, more than likely I have been on it.  At the height of my viral load he had me on four medications and I took them when I felt like it.  Complera was a nightmare, though it was supposed to be more patient friendly.  To me it was not.   Keflex were not my friend, those horrific red pills, made me sick. I  threw 1000s of dollars of medication into the trash.

I  had KS in 2002, fortunately not on my face but it alarmed my doctor as he had not seen patients have that since the late 80s and early 90s.  I went to the oncologist the day after it was diagnosed as KS, back in that time not many guys were getting it and there were few labs to diagnose the samples he scraped from my body.  Most oncologists in my area at that time would not treat it, fortunately my infectious disease doctor found a gay oncologist to treat me and I could deal with the two pills he gave me.  I saw him for about two years.  I took the medication he prescribed religiously as I wasn't about to have some obscure disease disfigure me.  

I am very fortunate to be here today, and I am not proud of my behavior in the past when it came to medications.  I understand that because of my disability status combined with Medicare and supplemented with Blue Cross and Blue Shield paid for by AICP (Aids Insurance Continuation Plan) I had the best doctors and medications available.  Sadly AICP went away as all the money, at least in my location, was now put aside strictly for ADAP.  I understand I have more than most when it comes to coverage, so I am no longer the bitter man who screamed on the phone at the director of the Florida Department of Health.  It was her first day back from maternity leave and her entire staff was "scared to call me" when I was informed my AICP was no longer going to be funded.  I tried paying $2250 a quarter for the Blue Cross/Blue Shied as my secondary.   I made one paymen.  Now  I am stuck with Simply Health Care as my secondary and it sucks as there are few if any specialists in my geographic area, and I was told the state could make me drive 50 miles one way in order to see any specialists.  I'll drive 50 miles to hook up, I won't drive 50 miles for a dermotolgist.

So, in closing, I'll just say this.  If you find a medication (or cocktail) that works for you, please take it.  It can save or extend your life.  I am one of the lucky ones who stopped taking meds, then fortunately found something that works, so I am alive .  Not all people, who behaved as irresponsibility as I did, can say that.

[hntnhole]

On 6/2/2023 at 10:41 PM, wood said:

I think it takes actually hearing a survivors tale to realize how apocalyptic he aids crisis was. We look back now with prep, treatment, bug chasing, etc and think ehhh there’s a solution.  
 

for so long there wasn’t. Imagine seeing everyone you know die in the prime of their lives. 
 

We lost an entire generation of incredibly talented men and every time I think about it I can cry. 

This ^. 

Those that lived through it know how indescribably terrible it was; those that came of sexual age when treatments had finally become available simply don't, and cannot be expected to.  I think there's a residual sadness that will never completely go away, no matter how heavily we paper-over the wounds.  That remembered horror is a part of the life-stories of those of us that went through it and survived.  One neighbor we knew laid down in our driveway and died. 

Guys who didn't live through it can't possibly be expected to fully comprehend - thank Whatever.  

[muscmtl]

According to my pole, we are 2

[LoadHunter612]

3 hours ago, hntnhole said:

apocalyptic he aids crisis was

as someone who lived through it, it's a mindfuck as to what my goal actually is.  anyone who didn't live through it can't understand how bad it was.

Edited July 2, 2023 by LoadHunter612
trying to avoid getting booted for posting in the wrong place

[LoadHunter612]

4 hours ago, ellentonboy said:

lived to tell the tale

really glad you're still around to tell the tale.  

[versmetropig]

I am still here - I tested poz with the first ERISA tests back in 1985 when I was 22, and 39 years later I am still here at age 61. My first long term partner was HIV+ when we met in '86 and passed from AIDS in '89. Met my current partner now husband in 1990 and we celebrate 34 years on January 15. He's STILL neg, I'm still poz - with both men our relationships have been sexually open and free - just emotionally monogamous. I've been a regular top/vers in the NYC party scene since 2000 and in the safe sex group scenes of the 90s returned to BB after 5 or 6 years in the early 90s of condom-only sex, pushed back into BB by of all people the porn star Scott O'Hara.

[meetme]

Scott OHara was a great guy, so hot and smart. I didn’t get back into barebacking until 2000 when it suddenly hit me, wait, I love doing this, take that condom off.  My realization happened at Steamworks in Chicago.

[BootmanLA]

Note to all: A part of this thread veered off into urging contacts/discussion about chasing HIV strains. That's a topic for the Backroom forums, not the Health threads.

[BBBxCumDumpster]

On 7/2/2023 at 11:10 AM, BradStevens said:

I feel I must follow up on this post.... in 2001 (five years after I fired my doctor) I got very sick and went to a new doctor at the urging of friends. It was determined that I had 33 T-cells. However, there were newer meds available which appeared to be working for people so I went on the first of a number of cocktails at that time and have remained on some sort of HIV cocktail since, with the exception of one self-prescribed drug holiday which was a really dumb idea and very nearly killed me. For most of the last 20 years I have maintained a Zero viral load and decent T-cells in the 300-400 range.

But I still believe the decision to stop AZT treatment in 1996 was the right one and attribute my survival to that choice.

Absolutely!  I had a friend who survived for years without pills.  He swore AZT was poison and I believed him. Eventually, he and his boyfriend died days apart. But they survived longer than most.

I have been  positive for over 30 years.  I told my doctor--an amazing progressive gay man--to take me off Novir as I went from optimal cholesterol to over 200.  My doctor confirmed my start date of the drug coincided with cholesterol gone haywire.  It went down to 130 soon after.  That doctor retired and I briefly had another doctor.  Terrible doctor and person.  She continued to prescribe Viread as I battled renal cell carcinoma of all things. (I still have two working kidneys.)

Having watched some friends survive and thrive and others die gruesome deaths--painful closed casket deaths--I learned that treatment must be a collaboration.  The stories you hear about the 80s and 90s, unfortunately were not exaggeration. It was a dreary time and survivors, like myself, still are haunted by that period. And some of us occasionally wonder why we survived even thrived and others were gone shortly after diagnosis. 

[Triscuit]

I was supposed to be dead in 1986, but I'm still going strong.  The doctor I had told me not to take AZT when they were first prescribing it because the doses were so high.  I'm not saying that's a reason I'm still around, but it makes you think.  It is quite sobering to think back on the early days of the disease and remember how terrified we were.  Every cough, every fever, every strange spot on my skin would send me into a bout of depression.  It's still hard for me to come to grips with all the medical advances through the years that have saved us.  It makes me remember all my friends who weren't so lucky.  I wonder what they would've become; what they would have contributed to the world. 

[Bimarried001]

On 2/29/2024 at 6:02 PM, Triscuit said:

I was supposed to be dead in 1986, but I'm still going strong.  The doctor I had told me not to take AZT when they were first prescribing it because the doses were so high.  I'm not saying that's a reason I'm still around, but it makes you think.  It is quite sobering to think back on the early days of the disease and remember how terrified we were.  Every cough, every fever, every strange spot on my skin would send me into a bout of depression.  It's still hard for me to come to grips with all the medical advances through the years that have saved us.  It makes me remember all my friends who weren't so lucky.  I wonder what they would've become; what they would have contributed to the world. 

I remember when I was diagnosed. One of the first things on my mind was finding a way to kill myself to make it look like an accident so that no one would know I had aids. Since my wife and family had no idea I was gay/bi and taking cock I did not want to have them deal with that. 
But I went on meds right away and never got sick. Hardest thing was having hiv and keeping it from my wife. Eventually she found out and found out because she got it. 
But we are both still alive and healthy.