Surplus of bottoms?

[yngguy712]

I refuse to hookup with total bottoms. They’re always selfish aholes. Didn’t matter if I was a total top I still would never. It’s plays directly into their personalities.   I’m a versbttm that really likes to flip. Can go from sub I dom.  But often I find the other guy hasn’t prepared. It’s a lot of work to be properly prepared for a long session.  Nothing worse than to go about it and get a flake.  In Los Angeles also you compete with the cumdumps. The ones taking 50-70 loads in one evening. What jerks.  And not even inviting another bottom.  Those guys should be flushed.  

[Guest]

3 hours ago, Bottom Jim said:

I have found if you add married guys I have found tops in good supply Almost all married guys are tops. They just want an ass in fuck and nut in

My experience has been that most married guys if not all have been bottoms. I do tend to have a rather domineering attitude so that may explain part of it. 

[Guest]

19 minutes ago, yngguy712 said:

I refuse to hookup with total bottoms. They’re always selfish aholes. Didn’t matter if I was a total top I still would never. It’s plays directly into their personalities.   I’m a versbttm that really likes to flip. Can go from sub I dom.  But often I find the other guy hasn’t prepared. It’s a lot of work to be properly prepared for a long session.  Nothing worse than to go about it and get a flake.  In Los Angeles also you compete with the cumdumps. The ones taking 50-70 loads in one evening. What jerks.  And not even inviting another bottom.  Those guys should be flushed.  

You should consider seeking therapy as this post is so damn loaded with anger and hate. 

[Guest]

I personally don’t have an issue finding tops. In my case I am not really big on apps and don’t log on often, once in a while I do, but not often. Reason being is that I have no patience to log online, search, chat, arrange etc etc. What I have managed to do over the years is keep in touch with tops. If I hook up with a top and we enjoyed the time, I keep in touch. I saved their number, I let them know I had good time & want to keep in touch. I invite them back & I try to setup a rapport with them. This leads to where I stand today which is I have about 20ish top in my contact list in my hometown. I hook up 2-3x a week with someone in that 20. Someone is always available & they all know to just reach out to me if they are in the mood and I’ll rearrange. my schedule for them, if possible. In addition, 3 of the tops I regularly meet as they are similar to me in that they don’t have desire  or energy to go online and rather just call someone they know. A few of the tops I’ve known for years. In fact one has been a fuck bud of line for 13 years and I meet up with him at least once or twice a month.  

I agree there are more bottoms than top but I’ve circumvented this issue by just sticking to guys I know and have met and keep in touch. There are time I crave something new and when that happens I either attend fuck parties or log on. The thing that works in my favor is that I am consistent bottom: I can be available, I don’t bring or create drama, and I rarely cancel. Tops like this above all things, a bottom they can rely on. 

[ObedientChaser]

36 minutes ago, yngguy712 said:

 In Los Angeles also you compete with the cumdumps. The ones taking 50-70 loads in one evening. 

So, there are bottoms that correspond to 50-70 tops? Then maybe there are lots of tops out there.... 

[4tops2use]

9 hours ago, Spunkinmyarse said:

I’ve never been convinced by this. The thing is, most tops are a one shot deal- whether they’re online or in a cruise bar, they generally hook up, unload, and disappear back into real life to get on with other things.

Bottoms, on the other hand, just keep on going- the more loads they get, the more they want. So they stay online, always hunting for more- or hang out in the cruise bar/sauna to the bitter end. That’s why at the end of the night it seems like there’s nothing but bottoms.

And because bottoms cum less often, they’re always horny, always more willing to chat about sex on sites like this- and that feeds into the illusion that there are more bottoms than tops. 

I reckon there’s a pretty even split. In fact, if you take guys who self-identify as “straight”, I reckon there are actually far more tops than bottoms out there in the world as a whole.

You make a very good point, Spunkinmyarse.

 

[austin_submale]

4 hours ago, ErosWired said:

This is apples and oranges. If you include all the men in the world as a whole who identify as straight (not gay), then of course penetrators will outnumber bottoms, by a wide margin - heterosexual males don’t take cock up their asses, by definition (and by practice).

But if you survey the population of Men Who Have Sex With Men, you won’t get the same results. Informal polling on this site has repeatedly found a distribution of roughly 66% declared bottoms, 24% declared fully vers, and 10% declared Total Tops. The proportion of the population of declared bottoms who are actually bottom-leaning vers is likely quite high, with truly exclusive total bottoms likely occupying a range equivalent to Total Tops. But generally speaking, there’s a lot more ass trying to get filled than there is cock available to fill it at any given time.

Anecdotally, most accounts from the field reflect what we see in the polling. In addition, in looking at the number of putative Tops on the apps, one has to take into account the masturbatory factor that renders a significant number of them null in terms of actual viable fucking partners. They aren’t actually looking to fuck, after a few fist beats won’t be looking at all, and are therefore not Tops in any functional sense.

^^^^ This +1,000,000.  I think this is exactly right, at least from what I've seen.

 

[austin_submale]

3 hours ago, yngguy712 said:

I refuse to hookup with total bottoms. They’re always selfish aholes. Didn’t matter if I was a total top I still would never. It’s plays directly into their personalities.   I’m a versbttm that really likes to flip. Can go from sub I dom.  But often I find the other guy hasn’t prepared. It’s a lot of work to be properly prepared for a long session.  Nothing worse than to go about it and get a flake.  In Los Angeles also you compete with the cumdumps. The ones taking 50-70 loads in one evening. What jerks.  And not even inviting another bottom.  Those guys should be flushed.  

So total bottoms are "always selfish aholes" because they won't top?  What if they've got a legit reason for not topping like ED or just having too small a cock to really achieve proper penetration?  Or maybe they just don't like it?  Saying that someone is an ahole just because they don't like to top, or that it is selfish...  I dunno.  Sounds a little like jealousy the way you begrudge the guys who get a lot of loads.  I can understand that I suppose, I'm an older chub guy so I don't get much action.  But even if they invited another bottom it wouldn't be any guarantee that they wouldn't still get the bulk of the action.  A lot of selection is just that tops can be, and therefore often are, extremely picky.  A lot of them only like femmy bottoms, or thin, young twinky bottoms, or only clean shaved and short haired or whatever.  It seems like you are blaming other bottoms for what is largely a top (or lack thereof) issue.  Anyway, you can be mad about it all you want, but those guys are always going to be the ones getting the bulk of the loads as long as that's what tops want.

 

[austin_submale]

2 hours ago, ObedientChaser said:

So, there are bottoms that correspond to 50-70 tops? Then maybe there are lots of tops out there.... 

Are there really bottoms who are taking that many loads in one day on a regular basis?  That's about 2x more than what I've usually heard that I considered wild ass boasting.  I mean maybe on a rare occasion, but even most of the cumdumps I've ever talked to 10-15 loads in a session they'd consider a pretty good day.  But I could be wrong...

 

[NWUSHorny]

While there is some truth to the surplus of bottoms, a bigger issues is guys that either don't fuck in any position or don't really know how.  Where I live now, probably 90% of the guys online list bottom on their profiles or say bottom when asked in person, but the real problem is they don't actually fuck or have given up. It doesn't happen to me when I travel or happen to me when I lived in other places, but I often wind up jacking off before or after leaving the sex club, because there are no one is willing, able and ready to take a quick fuck when I get ready to leave. The other problem I encounter, which is true of bottoms, tops and versatile guys where I live is that they have too many inhibitions and restrictions on how they can fuck or get fucked that at least 50% of them are unsatisfying fucks after spending hours of wooing (cruising for a hookup isn't supposed to take hours to close the deal) to get them to do anything. This area is noted for having an extreme surplus of bottoms, but as a versatile guy who is successful in finding bottoms and at least getting occasionally getting topped in other parts of the world, it looks more like a deficit of men who actually know how to hookup and then be flexible enough to have a satisfying experience once you do hookup.

[YourNoLimitsBottom]

5 hours ago, austin_submale said:

I hear a lot of "not my type".  If you aren't young, thin and good looking, forget it.  Old, chubby pigs like myself usually only get interest from a few guys.

Yeah, I'm not in my 20s anymore. I came to this lifestyle later in the game (started in my late 30s). And the small number of local tops on the online sites definitely are looking for the younger guys. I hooked up with some tops early on (going to say by sheer dumb luck and some stars probably aligned just right) but the best results I got was getting out in the world once I got up the nerve. Best thing I ever did. That way the guys get to know you, and not some preconceived notion they have of guys they came up with looking at some online stats.

[austin_submale]

2 minutes ago, YourNoLimitsBottom said:

Yeah, I'm not in my 20s anymore. I came to this lifestyle later in the game (started in my late 30s). And the small number of local tops on the online sites definitely are looking for the younger guys. I hooked up with some tops early on (going to say by sheer dumb luck and some stars probably aligned just right) but the best results I got was getting out in the world once I got up the nerve. Best thing I ever did. That way the guys get to know you, and not some preconceived notion they have of guys they came up with looking at some online stats.

Yeah, I generally have as good or better luck meeting guys at the bookstore booths and theater than I do on the online sites.  The people who are only looking for a certain type won't be interested anyway, but some guys when the opportunity is there in person will give it a try.

 

[austin_submale]

13 minutes ago, NWUSHorny said:

While there is some truth to the surplus of bottoms, a bigger issues is guys that either don't fuck in any position or don't really know how.  Where I live now, probably 90% of the guys online list bottom on their profiles or say bottom when asked in person, but the real problem is they don't actually fuck or have given up. It doesn't happen to me when I travel or happen to me when I lived in other places, but I often wind up jacking off before or after leaving the sex club, because there are no one is willing, able and ready to take a quick fuck when I get ready to leave. The other problem I encounter, which is true of bottoms, tops and versatile guys where I live is that they have too many inhibitions and restrictions on how they can fuck or get fucked that at least 50% of them are unsatisfying fucks after spending hours of wooing (cruising for a hookup isn't supposed to take hours to close the deal) to get them to do anything. This area is noted for having an extreme surplus of bottoms, but as a versatile guy who is successful in finding bottoms and at least getting occasionally getting topped in other parts of the world, it looks more like a deficit of men who actually know how to hookup and then be flexible enough to have a satisfying experience once you do hookup.

Some of the things you say really make a lot of sense...  the people who beat around the bush or are looky-loos or talk a long time and don't get to business...  And yeah, lots of inhibitions or expectations or restrictions that people let get in the way of things happening.  As you note, flexibility is a good thing when it comes to making a hookup work out.

[NWUSHorny]

7 minutes ago, austin_submale said:

Are there really bottoms who are taking that many loads in one day on a regular basis?  That's about 2x more than what I've usually heard that I considered wild ass boasting.  I mean maybe on a rare occasion, but even most of the cumdumps I've ever talked to 10-15 loads in a session they'd consider a pretty good day.  But I could be wrong...

 

To be fair, I'm no longer what would be considered young and hot, but can easily find the 10 to 15 guys to fuck me (not necessarily breed me) at sex clubs or orgies in Los Angeles in 2 or 3 hour period. However my experience is significantly more than half of those 10 to 15 guys are versatile and we wind up flip fucking.  Where as here in Portland, a town that is noted for an extreme surplus of bottoms I can go to the bathhouse spend 8 hours and strike out completely, and finding someone willing to flip fuck happens maybe half a dozen times a year. I have long observed that to get a lot of fucking as either a top or bottom you need to be in a place with versatile guys that are willing to act on their versatility. Here even the guys that claim to be versatile won't flip in a single session, or even in another session, once they have topped or bottomed with that guy that is their set position for all future hookups with the same guy.

[hungry_hole]

12 hours ago, Spunkinmyarse said:

I’ve never been convinced by this. The thing is, most tops are a one shot deal- whether they’re online or in a cruise bar, they generally hook up, unload, and disappear back into real life to get on with other things.

This is absolutely true. When a bottom shoots his load, especially inadvertently, also stop being horny and many no longer want to continue bottom. When I used to go to saunas more often I knew that if I wanted to be able to use a public sling being monopolized by a bottom, the solution was to somehow make him cum. Most would jump off the sling and then I could use it.

12 hours ago, Spunkinmyarse said:

And because bottoms cum less often, they’re always horny, always more willing to chat about sex on sites like this- ...

This is what makes the cumdumps and cumholes. 

12 hours ago, Spunkinmyarse said:

... and that feeds into the illusion that there are more bottoms than tops. 

It's difficult to come to a consensus about the ratio of tops and bottoms but there are some facts.

A guy in his 70's or 80's who can hold a nice hard erection for long periods of time and who can then shoot a nice load, especially a raw hole, would have no problem finding sex partners. An older guy in the same age range who is looking to get fucked and bred won't be as lucky. To be lucky as a bottom it helps to be young.