First time fucked. Unexpected and shocking

[davescott1125]

I wonder if they wanted you hooded so you didn't see their biohazard tattoos.

[Teeslad70]

2 hours ago, davescott1125 said:

I wonder if they wanted you hooded so you didn't see their biohazard tattoos.

Things like that just didn't even occur to me!

[Teeslad70]

Thanks for all the comments.

[Bimarried001]

On 7/31/2023 at 6:11 AM, Teeslad70 said:

I could never tell her.

Good. As a dl married man myself I can tell you that it’s hotter when the wife does not know. 

[Teeslad70]

2 hours ago, Bimarried001 said:

Good. As a dl married man myself I can tell you that it’s hotter when the wife does not know. 

It's all part of the thrill.

[Teeslad70]

Over 3 months later and I still run through this daily in my mind.

The thrill, the excitement, the risks. What might have happened that I was unaware of.

The fear. The want.

It's intoxicating.

[Teeslad70]

Am I a cockwhore and cumslut?

[Teeslad70]

I just want someone to take control of me and make me do it again.

Is this a normal response?

[Teeslad70]

Sorry to keep posting, but it's obsessing me.

I don't know if I'm a certain type of person, or whether my reaction is more common.

[Teeslad70]

So the large, ever rolling, ever heightening wave finally broke with a crash, and this afternoon saw me on my knees sucking the large cock of a large silverhaired man of over 60, while he told me exactly what he thought of me.

As I sucked him I imagined him bending me over his car and fucking me like his little whore, but it wasn't to be and I took his load in my mouth.

I didn't want to offer. I wanted to be taken.

Maybe next time when the urge gets too much.

[Roughrawteatime]

Cruising park bent over took 9 

I could feel the cum dripping down my legs 

love Anonymous

[hntnhole]

4 hours ago, Teeslad70 said:

I didn't want to offer. I wanted to be taken

Since "the wave" (of Lust, I reckon) has crashed, and it thrilled you (other than your unexpressed desire to "be taken"), of course you'll seek out more Cocks in the coming weeks/months.  Maybe even sooner.  

I'm not sure how the initial hook-up was arranged, but if it was via some website prior to the meet-up, maybe you could drop a hint or three as to what you really feel you need/want out of the hookup.  It can't hurt to run it up the flagpole, and see if his Cock salutes.  Not a demand, merely a broad hint.  It's to the Cock's benefit to have this information so he can work it into the hookup.  If he doesn't know, well ......... it's not his fault you didn't get everything you needed.

As you're recently aware, wanton raw sex is a behavior that can indeed become "addictive", so some kind of construct to deceive  your wife might be in order.  Something like a regular meeting of some club, or other contrivance to allow you to follow your instinctive needs without constant angst about it.  I'm not condoning deceit, but it's none of my business either. 

Point: you're almost certain to repeat the behavior, you don't want to interfere with the other aspects of your life, so some kind of "planning" might kick that can down the road a bit.  Just be prepared when your wife does figure it out - she most likely will at some point.  

Good luck.

[Teeslad70]

I totally get it. This hadn't been arranged, but I just parked up in a known cruising spot and he was waiting. I can't explain how I feel in these moments, but I just have to go through with it for the intensity of the desire to fade... until next time.

I've used hook up sites in the past and I may very well return to them, but at present this is my only online presence for this, and it fulfills the need for me to express myself.

[hntnhole]

6 hours ago, Teeslad70 said:

I've used hook up sites in the past and I may very well return to them

I understand.  When we live in an area that's not a sexual playground for wanton sex, it can be difficult to find other guys into the kind of sex we barebackers love and need.  

Best of luck, bud 

[Teeslad70]

Publishing what I do also helps. I want to read what people think about me.