What is with hook-up sites/apps?

[norefusal]

3 minutes ago, Sfmike64 said:

Is it just me or have the phishing scams with Asian guys exploded in the past few months on Grindr ? They have weirdly bad English syntax. Then usually want to switch to WhatsApp. That's the giveaway for me.

the pics are great tho. they're all gl and muscled out. but everyone all looking for tru love between their busy work in online finance investments 😜

[Labtmguy]

12 hours ago, norefusal said:

to me sniffies and grindr are separate beasts. 

to make the analogy: grindr is like a 90s gay bar, sniffies is like a 90s reststop off the highway😜

the only sites i got zero hookups from are the really niche ones like recon or buddy that cater to bdsm or chasers. 

apps: grindr was by far my best success. scruff, growlr, daddyhunt, etc were like bars in the sense i'd hookup some  as "fresh meat" but then the trail would go stale. 

adam4adam and squirt were sim, a few early hookups and then long months of "why do i bother" before not bothering 

sniffies is like the toxic ex i keep going back to. it's not healthy but hey, what's a sex addict to do

Very true. 
sniffies is worse than on the toxic x, cause I pay for the subscription.   Lol

[PozBearWI]

10 hours ago, Sfmike64 said:

Is it just me or have the phishing scams with Asian guys exploded in the past few months on Grindr ? They have weirdly bad English syntax. Then usually want to switch to WhatsApp. That's the giveaway for me.

Exactly, and the count was up to dozens a day.  Those guys plus the handsome guys giving "massage" if we send PayPal money to their manager first before we schedule....  

[GrandpaKink]

On 5/6/2024 at 11:32 PM, badubydo said:

I mean that is fine and all, but when my profile says I am there for "fun and/or NSA only" I find it very annoying they send me a message and asking to want to grab a drink. Then get pissy when I don't answer or delete the messages. 

 

 

To me, grabbing a drink falls under NSA. What's not desired is anyone looking for a partner/spouse  specifically.

[NWUSHorny]

5 hours ago, GrandpaKink said:

To me, grabbing a drink falls under NSA. What's not desired is anyone looking for a partner/spouse  specifically.

I guess I see it differently, meeting for drinks is a date not a hookup to fuck. I frequently see profiles where I live that appear to be written by someone who is looking for a buddy to hang out with. That is the problem, we don't have separate sites or areas within the sites for guys looking to feck, guys looking for companionship i.e hangout with or date, and guys seeking LTR, which makes the apps less useful for all of us.

[PozBearWI]

Sometimes I just want to see how our conversation flows before we get naked together.  I'm always clear I am in a LTR; so not looking for that.  But friends of any flavor is great; and friends who sometimes like to play even better.  

[norefusal]

i can't even imagine what my life would be like if i didn't go w the flow. half my experiences would never have been lived. 

my biggest issue w sites is the lack of follow thru.

i recently chatted w a nice guy who said he was part of a couple looking for a regular 3way fwb, so wanted to meet for a drink first to see if we all vibed. this made perfect sense to me and i wasn't even all "we fucking rn or what?!" because it's possible to do parallel paths. i agreed to meet sometime, while also DMing other guys to come tuck me rn. 

my only regret is the trail went stale. tbh if they're anything like most couples, he really wanted the 3 way and the hubby didn't thus all the "maybe. we'd have to meet first. no not him. no not tonight." etc 

[versasslover]

3 hours ago, PozBearWI said:

Sometimes I just want to see how our conversation flows before we get naked together.  I'm always clear I am in a LTR; so not looking for that.  But friends of any flavor is great; and friends who sometimes like to play even better.  

Same here. And just starting or keeping a conversation going is difficult most of the time now. Of course the single word messages have always been around. But a conversation is a two way street. 

[Sfmike64]

On 5/9/2024 at 9:14 PM, norefusal said:

the pics are great tho. they're all gl and muscled out. but everyone all looking for tru love between their busy work in online finance investments 😜

They're probably all bitcoin scams!

[AlwaysOpen]

A4A became nothing but spam for me, and I dropped it a few years ago. I don't know if everyone else, or anyone else,  has been constantly spammed on Sniffies by "verified profile" urging you to go to Sniffi {dot} com or to Redfet. I can report them as spam ( which takes a lot more effort than it ought to} but never any acknowledgement or visible action from Sniffies. 

At least a site like Squirt will give you premium membership or extend your membership 5 days  if you report a spammer to them and they determine it was indeed spam, or at least a violation of their terms of service. 

[AlwaysOpen]

I almost forgot to mention tonight's classic- an anon profile on NastyKinkPigs messaged me tonight from somewhere in Texas, a one line message  saying something to the effect" Contact me slave am Master and will make you my slave text me at my address ( and then some Gmail acct)"  OK, so other than the absurdity of an anon profile reaching out 990 miles to someone never before conversed with, when I looked at the profiles it showed him as bottom. So it went to NKP via the report button, but again, there will never be any reply back from them.  That alone is one of the issues with so many of the sites- they want the member numbers, they really want memberships sold, but they do not want any rapport with their customers. 

[BBArchangel]

On 5/9/2024 at 9:09 PM, Sfmike64 said:

Is it just me or have the phishing scams with Asian guys exploded in the past few months on Grindr ? They have weirdly bad English syntax. Then usually want to switch to WhatsApp. That's the giveaway for me.

For me, across the gamut of apps, I’m getting Russians. They’re all gorgeous, all young, all desperate to escape before they get drafted. And all looking for that total interest-killing “long-term relationship. Or words to that effect. All I have to do is help them get to America. “And do you have an account on Telegram?”

[KindaBasic]

On 5/5/2024 at 10:42 PM, badubydo said:

A4A, Grindr, Sniffies, etc. Like what the fuck is going on? 

3 anon profiles message me. Ask them for stats, they don't respond. 

 

Another 5 or so message me, don't read my profile and are surprised when I say I don't/cannot host. 

 

A4A is filled with scammers or nothing but people "I want to get to know you, let's have a drink, chat and maybe in 5-10 years we can have sex." 

I had one guy want me to drive to Palm Springs, from San Diego to "have a drink and chat" 

 

What the fuck? 

.and Grindr? Same as Sniffies. Blank profiles. Don't read mine, confused when I cannot host. Or just guys wanting to get off on trading pics. 

 

Like come the fuck on. I just wanted some dick. Not feelings. 

 

/End rant

A4A drives me nuts lately with that BS. You get hit up by these guys with blank profiles and no pics, and then they get all pissed when you won’t hookup with them. 

[ellentonboy]

On 5/10/2024 at 4:11 PM, NWUSHorny said:

I guess I see it differently, meeting for drinks is a date not a hookup to fuck. I frequently see profiles where I live that appear to be written by someone who is looking for a buddy to hang out with. That is the problem, we don't have separate sites or areas within the sites for guys looking to feck, guys looking for companionship i.e hangout with or date, and guys seeking LTR, which makes the apps less useful for all of us.

I have to say I agree with this completely.  I don't go on Barebackrt.com to find my future husband.  I used to laugh at things people posted on Adam4adam.com or dare I say Manhunt, where people were actually looking for boyfriends or partners.   It is ridiculous, apps and hook up sites should, even discreetly, mention this is for guys who are looking for sex, not someone to make a life long commitment with.  When I first used a site online, it was Men4Sexnow.com. I don't know if people still use it but that site was about sex, and at the time, it was very popular in my geographic area.  I would hit refresh, refresh and actually be so arrogant if there was not a new message for me.  Boy have times changed.  But still today, I will go on various sites and people will be looking for romance, "in all the wrong places" so to speak.  I did have a couple who wanted to "meet for drinks" off of Barebackrt.com.  I was like WTF - drinks?  No I can buy my own alcohol,  I am looking for sex.  I know some people want to make sure before they commit to hooking up that it's a "match" but I am not going to some bar to meet a couple, almost as if it is an audition for sex.  Move it along guys, as some guys point out clearly, "we are all here for the same reason".  However there are still people out there that just don't get it!

[ccmmss]

I agree the experience with apps is all over the place. Sometime just depend on where or when I am looking. I have had great times with some. But yes plenty of time spent with no result.

Bathouse are perfect if there is one in the area. Unfortunatly they are getting fewer. Maybe.... somehow.... new ones will open some day.