bearbandit
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Everything posted by bearbandit
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Eat what you want - if he can't take the taste in your cum, that's his problem. There are those of us who'd relish the extra flavours!
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The taste of cum is greatly influenced by what the donor has eaten recently. Asparagus seems to be one of the biggest culprits, but many strongly flavoured herbs and spices can alter the taste of your cum if eaten regularly (the herbs and spices, that is). Drinks affect it too: I'm particularly partial to cum from a guy who's been drinking either Newcastle Brown Ale or good quality cider...
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I'm sure I'm not the only one who'd like to shake RawTop's hand (or other bits) in thanks for his work in correcting the hacking problem early today.
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I've found I work best as a trainer just talking from pre-prepared notes for an outline and then taking questions ( used the same notes for the historical articles I've done at www.beyondpositive.org ). Since I seroconverted (the rash is unmistakeable once seen) the year before the PCP and KS clusters were noticed by the CDC, and I was working for a gay helpline I've been involved from the start, so a natural topic for me was a personal history of HIV. This was for the local social services who've asked me back this year. If I have to do the life cycle of HIV as well, then I know where to get a good powerpoint, though I have to say I prefer just to stand, talk and answer questions... Naturally, a talk for people doing advice about sex over the phone will need a completely different set of notes! It's easier just to talk from life...
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It's for various sex-advice help-lines. Most sex advice in the UK is still condoms everywhere and no-one is prepared to talk about barebacking in anything but hysterical tones. I'm going to be travelling 200 miles because although most of the guys there will have barebacked at some point none of them are prepared to admit it... (hence my idea of using a bloody biohazard tat as an illustration). My hope is to get over the real facts as I see and live them about bb - especially outside London where there are far fewer sex venues. Helps too that I used to be a member of the helpline that's putting on the training session. Basically I want to get over the idea that there are strategies we use to avoid HIV or passing it on, that we're not all chasers or gifters, dispel some myths etc.
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Encountering any problem? Post them here...
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in Tips, Tricks, Rules & Help
That image is what I get. So far it seem to be the front page, the forums page and one other (forget its title, but it includes the word forum) affected... -
Appointment finally booked for Tuesday afternoon. Nothing fancy: plain black with (hopefully green spines along the "horns"). About 2", back of my neck. I'm due to be doing a training session in November for some gay organisations in London, so and they want an image for the poster: I'm going to ask the tattooist to get some pics of it while it's still raw and seeping blood...
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It's gonna take more than a few to fill a bucket after it's dripped off you!
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It's a good way of sorting out who gets invited back for an encore or three.
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Tops and Bottoms, how do you feel if a top cums fast?
bearbandit replied to colletonguy's topic in General Discussion
In a group situation "next!", if it's one on one keep a gentle sensual, rather than sexual, focus on him and wait for him to be ready to go again. I have had guys who've come too fast ask me to fuck them, almost like a consolation prize... -
How common are "buffalo humps"?
bearbandit replied to CaughtInTheMoment's topic in What's It Like To Be Poz?
It's an effect from the original protease inhibitors and as such very unlikely today. Even thought I lost over a quarter of my body weight last year (accidentally), when the weight came back so did the hump and the "who ate all the pies?" belly. My hump isn't pronounced and is generally copable with: in fact I'm going to take advantage of it by using the back of my neck as the site of my biohazard tattoo. Much less painful to have a fatty area tattooed than a boney area. The hump and the belly are the product of lipodystrophy, which is mal-distribution of fat around the body. Some of it you disguise with the right exercise to build up distracting muscle tissue. Elsewhere (such as the feet, there''s very little that can be done other than finding good supportive sock s and boots. A very few people might find themselves with lipodystrophy, even on modern formulations and dosages of the drugs, but they're not going to be the extreme examples we've seen in the past. Good diet (nineties dietary advice: "you know all those things we keep telling you not to eat. Well, eat them!") and exercise stands a chance of minimising the very rare occurence of lipodystrophy caused by ARVs. There are sufficient drugs now that if you do find yourself with the beginnings of lipo, it's a valid reason for changing drugs. Hope this helps Steve -
I wonder what my neighbors think...
bearbandit replied to Internal Blast's topic in General Discussion
I used to have a townhouse with integral garage which doubled as the playroom. The neighbour just thought my bike alarm was over-sensitive, while what actually happened was that the bottom I had tied to the bike moved too much. Then there was my habit of washing the floor down at three in the morning... -
I'm thinking of starting a new bareback hookup site…
bearbandit replied to rawTOP's topic in General Discussion
I'd second that Scottop -
I wonder what my neighbors think...
bearbandit replied to Internal Blast's topic in General Discussion
Jealousy, perhaps? At my last house my next door neighbour, a little old Welsh lady, suggested I should put a red light in my porch, and giggled behind her hand the way little old Welsh ladies do... -
That's what I mean when I say I concentrate on enjoying the journey rather than the destination (although for different reasons). Sometimes Viagra keeps me "too hard to cum" and sometimes it's not enough to get over the diabetes, in which case, it's just as well I'm versatile.
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I play stupid if asked that and say "yes I had a bath this morning, but it's a hot day so I might be getting a bit sweaty"... then I let them know how offensive "clean"=HIV- is...
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I'm trying (and failing) to remember the last slow and gentle fuck I had... When I'm topping I like to take it slow and gentle because it winds the bottom up, gets him reaching for it till it turns into a pounding. But the guys who've had me ass in the past couple of years have been hard and fast from the word go. Not complainin though
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Not so long ago I had a guy powerfucking me. He pulled out just before he came, let me lave a few mouthfuls of his dick (I realy like ATM) and then gave me a six guys' worth facial by himself. Shit, but I wish he lived nearer!
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why is having sex with men hotter than with women?
bearbandit replied to bottompigboi's topic in General Discussion
Hungry_hole: I used my dogs as an example of a gay man's child substitute, and another member caught my drift, knew where I was coming from and said so, thus illustrating further that as men we do have a caring nurturing side to our nature. I hardly think that's "going on about dogs", more illustrating that your division of the world into those who want children and those who don't doesn't necessarily run along gender or sexuality lines, and that there are alternatives for those unwilling o bring another human life into an already greatly over-crowded world. At worst the messages were a side remark, as will always happen in public forums. -
My "sex" article in www.beyondpositive.org stressed the fact that today's safer sex advice comes from an emergency panphlet written thirty years ago. What I didn't mention was that it wouldn't even be publishable today because of its language (sufferers, victims et al). Every other day medication is probably not a good idea in adherence, especially in poz guys: even when I'm feeling pretty well (got told yesterday that my viral load was zero - that's the number, not under some artificial marker where it's deemed undetectable) I have to check what day it is. Easier and better for adherence in the long run to keep medication daily. Weekly is another matter. I'm fully aware I've got a fucked about system with all the prescription drugs I've been through, but the fact remains that what I went through last year is listed on the cautions of the patient information leaflet: it's just incredibly rare. I'm just the proof that it can happen. Even the health worker at the charity I volunteer for refers to me as a "drug whore". In the UK we had last year the highest number of new diagnoses since records began. SF blamed the bathhouses, the UK government would like to blame, but can't, the recently repealed laws on public sex, the prissy sex-phobic gay community blame bbrts, Grindr et al. I blame insufficient education. I don't see this rise as a disservice to or disrespect of me: I see it as a failure of the people who should be educating kids about sex and life. I'm quite happy to go into schools and scare the crap out of schoolkids about what can happen - I'm doing it soon for local social services workers and for London Lesbian and Gay Switchboard (big joke: it's nearly 200 miles to London and they couldn't find anyone closer prepared to say that they bb'ed!)
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Bottoms: what if the Top don't want to fuck u bareback?
bearbandit replied to Cigar btm's topic in General Discussion
Fucking isn't the be-all and end-all of sex: plenty of other things, which can be just as intense if you devote even half the intensity of mind to them as we do to fucking... Do it right, and I can cum without touching my dick and without any anal stimulation. -
why is having sex with men hotter than with women?
bearbandit replied to bottompigboi's topic in General Discussion
Interesting idea, but how about those of us who "sublimate" our urge for kids into having pets? Over the years I've had four Rottweilers, all but one a rescue. We had to have one of the rescues put down because the torment of his previous life followed him and he became a fear biter, but the other three went on to work with people afraid of dogs who wanted to lose that phobia. If my current health/living situation allowed it I'd have another dog at the drop of a hat. Or indeed gay male couples who use a surrogate mother to have a child? In the eighties I knew a Dutch bloke who had his six year old daughter living with his: she was no fool. Knew what the St Andrews cross was for and so on. Even told her father not to have sex at the sauna (she was at a very possessive stage). The reality of sexual orientation: well I could wake up tomorrow and fancy a shag with a woman, but it hasn't happened since 1976, so I'm not holding my breath... -
I'll always admit when I've changed my mind and I have on PrEP. Providing special attention is paid after a few years (by which time hopefully there'll be something be better) to the possibility of kidney damage and osteopenia, I'm in favour. What's swung it for me is the number of kids, sorry "young adults" on Grindr etc with a Daddy fixation and their abominable level of HIV knowledge. The broken off conversations don't bother me ("aids is nasty" <block>), I've got thicker skin that that: what does worry me is that these young men are going out and getting fucked with knowledge that approximates ours in 1982. PrEP is coming up for approval in the UK soon, I believe, if it hasn't already. Certainly we've now got PEP. I just look forward to less toxic drugs being used.
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Damn good article - my only quibble being that they play down the side effect possibilities (no, I'm not going to launch into another "how tenofovir nearly killed me" rant). They do stress the need for consistent adherence to the regime - I manage this with my antivirals by tying my antivirals to the diabetes medication: if I miss my gliclazide I feel like crap. For other people the event thy tie their PrEP might be the ten o'clock news, the dog's evening walk, whatever. The important thing is to take it regularly, and to be aware that most of tenofovir's problems surface after about three year's of use. And I'm sorry, Slut, if a medication gets down to once a week us poz guys get first dibs ;-)
