OMG! You've read my mind. I've always thought that if a guy can't get hard then he ain't gonna get in and i'm not as tight as you say. Even if the hole is not that tight, it's still not gonna happen. I usually try what you try to help 'em out, suck him off, jerk him off, nipples, dirty talk, etc. I guess they get all worked up in their head then get anxiety when it's time to perform. It is very frustrating when you've spent all that time getting your hole nice and clean and perfect just to be a waste of time. Not to mention the fact that you've been eating very little and only certain things so you don't get messy in the middle of it all. I really believe many tops do not remotely understand what it takes to be good bottom. It's alot of fuckin' work...the least they could do is deliver a hard cock as I've delivered a sweet hole for them to breed. that's my 2 cents.