Tops that can't perform/ or lies about being a total top

[meatmonkey]

So I meet a guy on grindr  he had a nice cock and said  he was an alpha top. I went to his house and was sucking and gagging on his cock I was in heaven. Than it came time for him to fuck me. He got it in, but he kept going soft so he would pull out and jerk himself hard again than shove it back in me to only go soft again. He said he was nervous but after four attempts I told he I was going to leave, but he than said you can fuck me. So I fucked the living hell out of him than left. I was just curious if this ever happens to any one else on here. I am vers but when i bottom i want a good hard fuck that I remember.

[CigarBear68]

Shit happens man, esp once you're over 40. Don't take it personally. 

[Guest Upstateguy518]

I get that going limp happens but I can't help but find it amusing when it happens to a guy claiming to be a stud or total top. I had a similar situation with this 25-year-old I met on Grindr. Sucked him hard but when it came time to fuck, He went limp. I actually chuckled when he asked me to come back to his place the next day to make up for it.

[BreedingKinkTwink]

I'm a little iffy when it comes to performance as a top, so I feel for guys that go soft. For me it's a stress thing most often, so if a top has issues I offer him a beer and a suck. If it's my issue, I usually just do something like tongue/fingers/toys until I've got myself back to a good place.

I know, not all bottoms are willing to deal with it, but if they aren't, I feel like it's probably not going to be compatible in the long run anyway. Stressing about sex is just depressing, and there's enough of both of those to go around with the rest of life.

As always though, this is just my filthy opinion!

[tallslenderguy]

To me, this is All part of it, there can be all sorts of reasons. I love men and I’m a bottom. For me it’s the tops attitude and desire to top I’m attracted too first. I wanna be penetrated by a top who loves to penetrate me, so I’m pretty damned happy to feel that energy and spread my legs for him. I feel badly if he does. I never feel like laughing at him, I just don’t feel amused, more like I want to find a way to help him enjoy. 

[studl1]

it sucks I'm top and it happen to me could not stay hared now i take instead of give. it can be nevice but some times u want it so bad that it said no

[versamarried]

I just do not like it when it becomes patently clear they never had any intention of topping even though they stated that is all they wanted to do. Suddenly in the heat of things they are begging for your cock and just happen to be cleaned out.

[tallslenderguy]

31 minutes ago, versamarried said:

I just do not like it when it becomes patently clear they never had any intention of topping even though they stated that is all they wanted to do. Suddenly in the heat of things they are begging for your cock and just happen to be cleaned out.

lol, yeah, i haven't encountered that,  but see what you mean.  It's hard for me to put the two together (i.e., "tops that can't perform/or lies about being a total top), because they are two different things. My first answer was about the top that can't perform, guys who are lying bother me and are a total turn off. 

[Guest bbbearlover1]

One of the few times that has happened to me (going soft) was when I hooked up with a guy who claimed to be a sub. He wasn't, and it was pretty clear within a few minutes. I am clear as a bell that I am looking for subs, not just mere bottoms. My dick does not respond to mere bottoms, just like my dick doesn't respond to those who suddenly claim that they want me to wear a condom, after it's clear that I fuck raw. 

Now, the getting older bit does make me nervous, but I think I would go out and get what I needed to get for myself if that situation, ahem, arose. 

Here's another wrinkle that I've come across a fair few times: white "total" tops who "only bottom for Black men." They're an interesting lot, and I had my share of them, before I fully embraced my dominance. Now, I am happy to converse with them, but to get my dick hard, I need to make sure that they're really subs. And it's likely that my appreciation for subs, and the relationship between Doms and subs add to the hotness of a potential fuck for me. To know that I can do as I wish with a sub who has presented me with that gift blows my mind and generates my dick.

[tallslenderguy]

1 hour ago, bbbearlover1 said:

One of the few times that has happened to me (going soft) was when I hooked up with a guy who claimed to be a sub. He wasn't, and it was pretty clear within a few minutes. I am clear as a bell that I am looking for subs, not just mere bottoms. My dick does not respond to mere bottoms, just like my dick doesn't respond to those who suddenly claim that they want me to wear a condom, after it's clear that I fuck raw. 

Now, the getting older bit does make me nervous, but I think I would go out and get what I needed to get for myself if that situation, ahem, arose. 

Here's another wrinkle that I've come across a fair few times: white "total" tops who "only bottom for Black men." They're an interesting lot, and I had my share of them, before I fully embraced my dominance. Now, I am happy to converse with them, but to get my dick hard, I need to make sure that they're really subs. And it's likely that my appreciation for subs, and the relationship between Doms and subs add to the hotness of a potential fuck for me. To know that I can do as I wish with a sub who has presented me with that gift blows my mind and generates my dick.

i appreciate so many of the points you bring up bbbearlover1, if for no other reason that it highlights how much more there can be to this.

The first thing i think when a Top cannot maintain His hard on is: "maybe i, or something about the situation, doesn't turn Him on."  

i also appreciate you sharing your perspective as a Dom. From what i have read of your posts, you fit the term "Dom" as i relate to it.  i've learned there are lot's of variations on the D/s spectrum, to the point where i have pretty much stopped putting the word "sub" in my profiles.  i have a decided sub side, but for me, it is dependent on the Dom, and i wonder if the opposite isn't true? I.e., a Dom's response is dependent on the sub?  That it's largely a matter of fit? 

  It's kind of fascinating. my sub side is obviously there to me, but only certain types of Dom's bring it out in me, so i have stopped advertising i am sub because i don't want to mislead anyone and have run into many guys presenting as "Dom" who just struck me as bullies (which i see as weakness), and completely turn me off.   i say "certain types of Dom's" because i realize i don't make up the definitions or rules, not sure anyone does, so it seems best to go on individual basis with the understanding that the words "Dom" and "sub" are there for communication and points of reference, but meaning has to be determined on more of an individual basis?  

[versamarried]

3 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

lol, yeah, i haven't encountered that,  but see what you mean.  It's hard for me to put the two together (i.e., "tops that can't perform/or lies about being a total top), because they are two different things. My first answer was about the top that can't perform, guys who are lying bother me and are a total turn off. 

Well the link is when you are messing around and they cannot get or keep an erection because they are not real tops. Nothing less sexy than being spread open and feeling them fiddle around back there like they are trying to hide an acorn or something.

[hungry_hole]

On 2/25/2018 at 1:16 PM, meatmonkey said:

So I meet a guy on grindr  he had a nice cock and said  he was an alpha top... He said he was nervous but after four attempts I told he I was going to leave, but he than said you can fuck me. So I fucked the living hell out of him than left. I was just curious if this ever happens to any one else on here.

When I was young and had a hot muscular body, and I was horny and looking to get fucked, I used to pretend that I was looking to fuck a hole and then the challenge was to trick and get the other guy to fuck me. It worked most of the time and it was so hot to leave their place with their load inside my hole. There was nothing to feel bad about because I had just witnessed what a good time they had while they pumped their load in my hole.

[ErosWired]

1 hour ago, versamarried said:

Nothing less sexy than being spread open and feeling them fiddle around back there like they are trying to hide an acorn or something.

At first I wondered if this was a euphemism for small cock, then I decided it was just a hilarious image, then I soberly realized, given the number of fetishes I've been exposed to, that it's not outside the realm of possibility. Given my luck, I could end up in a bondage scene only to watch the Top pull out a bushel bag of acorns...