Tops: If fucking is a contest, how do you know when you've "won"?

[LetsPOZBreed]

This is why I love sex with men.

My top has "won" when I've basically lost all control over the action.   I don't really resist, unless the top guy is just not very good.  If you're topping me (good), then this is how it usually goes:

You insert yourself slowly, and let me guide you in.  Taking a couple of slow pumps once fully inside.  Once I've gotten comfortable with you inside me, I get this look in my eyes that I shoot back to you that signals you can take me as you wish.  That's when the pace can pick up.  

Guys that "win" will usually vary their pacing over the course of the fuck.  Slowing down to make me beg for it again, picking it up to hear me whimpering, long strokes to really give me a good reaming.  Do that about three or four times, and you've "won" when I wrap my arms completely around your shoulders and just hang on for dear life.  My moans definitely change to something I've always found hard to describe.  

[Sunovabesh]

For me, I guess I "win" whenever I make my bottom cum and they feel exhausted but also cared for. 

Now, for me, I LOVE fucking some manly pussy. However, me cumming isn't my FULL intention. My REAL intention is to make the bottom enjoy being submissive, giving into their temptations, having them let themselves go, cumming so hard that they feel dominated, and wanna lay their head on my chest. My thing is this: if you can make an alpha slump down and cry from pure joy of letting himself go and cumming hella hard - You kinda win. But if you make an alpha cum so hard, slump down and want to hold you like you're the only one who can protect them - Yeah, you won, bro. 

Nothing makes me happier than making a manly ass dude be a submissive ass bitch who can let their inner "bitchiness" go and let me dominate them to the point they feel safe to be submissive. Also cumming hands-free.

[tallslenderguy]

17 hours ago, Sunovabesh said:

For me, I guess I "win" whenever I make my bottom cum and they feel exhausted but also cared for. 

Now, for me, I LOVE fucking some manly pussy. However, me cumming isn't my FULL intention. My REAL intention is to make the bottom enjoy being submissive, giving into their temptations, having them let themselves go, cumming so hard that they feel dominated, and wanna lay their head on my chest. My thing is this: if you can make an alpha slump down and cry from pure joy of letting himself go and cumming hella hard - You kinda win. But if you make an alpha cum so hard, slump down and want to hold you like you're the only one who can protect them - Yeah, you won, bro. 

Nothing makes me happier than making a manly ass dude be a submissive ass bitch who can let their inner "bitchiness" go and let me dominate them to the point they feel safe to be submissive. Also cumming hands-free.

i love this, and not sure i can completely articulate why? (but that never stops me from trying lol). i know i love You for articulating Your thoughts and feelings. i love that You recognize and enjoy the challenge of 'winning' (more fully connecting because barriers are removed?). 

i think there is more than the pleasure of physical orgasm fueling the sex drive. We see it in other mammals, using sex to establish 'pecking order,' 'alpha dominance, etc..'  i want to think that one of the things that separates us from animals is the addition of reason and thought to our instincts that gives us a broader, more detailed experience of living. 

The spectrum theory of sexual identity makes the most sense to me, i.e., each of us lands somewhere on a sexual spectrum. E.g. Straight on one end, gay on the other, Dom on one end, sub on the other, Top on one end, bottom on the other.  i think that's way over simplified, and that the "spectrum" is not just lineal, but multidimensional.  Annnnnd, it's not static, but fluid lol. Course, glass is fluid, as is water, but one moves more quickly than the other... multidimensional. 

i suspect some of the most 'sub' appearing guys are the hardest to "win."  That they possess the "manly" attribute of control, it's just well hidden.  "Hardest,"  to win because their resistance, control, is hidden behind the submission they give. i love the notion of  a Dom/Top surprising a sub by exposing well hidden resistance, or control/dominance even he wasn't aware was there. 

i think a lot of the insatiable lust that some bottoms experience is the (unconscious?) search for a someone who can expose, subdue and possess them. i think the true is about Tops in the reverse, that the drive is similar from opposite poles.

[Guest BritBottom]

On 5/12/2019 at 7:03 AM, Sunovabesh said:

For me, I guess I "win" whenever I make my bottom cum and they feel exhausted but also cared for. 

Now, for me, I LOVE fucking some manly pussy. However, me cumming isn't my FULL intention. My REAL intention is to make the bottom enjoy being submissive, giving into their temptations, having them let themselves go, cumming so hard that they feel dominated, and wanna lay their head on my chest. My thing is this: if you can make an alpha slump down and cry from pure joy of letting himself go and cumming hella hard - You kinda win. But if you make an alpha cum so hard, slump down and want to hold you like you're the only one who can protect them - Yeah, you won, bro. 

Nothing makes me happier than making a manly ass dude be a submissive ass bitch who can let their inner "bitchiness" go and let me dominate them to the point they feel safe to be submissive. Also cumming hands-free.

As a total bottom, I think you have successfully described everything I have ever desired a Top. For me the success of the top is not by 'breaking' me into submission but by causing me to want to surrender my masculinity to his will and needs, wanting him to inhabit me 'body & soul'. When that happens I become fully vulnerable, with no defences - as you say it's letting go.  I can't describe the sensation of release this engenders or how deep it goes.  When a Top does that for me it's a total win for him but I feel far from having lost.