Throwing your life away for miss Tina - Addiction Issues

[Truversebb]

Moderator's Note: I am leaving this in General for the time being as it is currently a discussion about addiction and the issue of meth in our community. Do NOT let it turn into a party discussion. 

Non party guy here. I have had 3 people I know completely throw their lives away and everything good with it to that cruel selfish bitch. Same story...... all thought they were in control of it when in fact she was completely in the drivers seat the entire time. I’ll never understand why people do this with the outcome being so predictable. Please help me to understand. 

Edited December 27, 2018 by drscorpio
Caveat added - Title amended

[submissivebottom74]

Being an addict in recovery, it is the wiring of the brain. You truly have to understand addiction to understand an addict. For myself, it was not a choice the first time, as it was put into KY jelly without my knowledge or permission. After that, I was hooked. Yes, I am one of those people who threw my life away. A master's degree in education, 20+ years of teaching, all lost to her. But I could not stop, it took my family forcing me to move back with them and our village to make sure I was kept busy. If it weren't for that I would be dead. But again, it took a lot of love and patience, and I know I have received the biggest gift in the world.

[Truversebb]

47 minutes ago, submissivebottom74 said:

Being an addict in recovery, it is the wiring of the brain. You truly have to understand addiction to understand an addict. For myself, it was not a choice the first time, as it was put into KY jelly without my knowledge or permission. After that, I was hooked. Yes, I am one of those people who threw my life away. A master's degree in education, 20+ years of teaching, all lost to her. But I could not stop, it took my family forcing me to move back with them and our village to make sure I was kept busy. If it weren't for that I would be dead. But again, it took a lot of love and patience, and I know I have received the biggest gift in the world.

It’s rewarding to hear that you came out the other side of it.

[tallslenderguy]

2 hours ago, Truversebb said:

Non party guy here. I have had 3 people I know completely throw their lives away and everything good with it to that cruel selfish bitch. Same story...... all thought they were in control of it when in fact she was completely in the drivers seat the entire time. I’ll never understand why people do this with the outcome being so predictable. Please help me to understand. 

i take care of Tina patients on a regular basis... had one my last rotation who was paralyzed on one side from the stroke it caused.   

i've spent a lot of time trying to understand self destructive behavior. i think we have a lot of pieces to the puzzle, even maybe enough to form the beginning of a picture. i don't think we have all the pieces to the puzzle though, so i don't think it's possible to completely understand.  i think at this point it comes down to how we can thwart the behavior in our self, and help others who want to defeat it in their self. 

i have gone back and forth with moralizing behavior... guilt seems to work for some, not for others?  i don't use it, it seems delusional and hypocritical to me. The problem with moralizing is it's pretty easy to find destructive behavior is just about anyone. Morality seems a cultural construct to me. 

To me it comes down to the cost of 'pleasure' (not a perfect summary word, i know).  People using Tina use it because of the pleasure it brings them, but to me, you don't get a great return on your investment.  Sort of like jumping out of a plane without a parachute.  There is the thrill of flying, but it doesn't last very long. 

i can come up with all sorts of analogies, but i don't believe the choice to use Tina (or engage in any self destructive behavior) is rational. i believe the choice is based on wanting to create or recreate a feeling. i think that becomes a drive that is not easily overcome with rationale. 

In my opinion (and that's all it is or is worth lol), one of the more successful methods to overcome destructive behavior is substitution. i think submissivebottom hits on it when he talks about keeping "busy."   We also substitute heroin with methadone, or diet Coke for regular Coke or baked potato chips with fried. 

[Truversebb]

2 hours ago, tallslenderguy said:

i take care of Tina patients on a regular basis... had one my last rotation who was paralyzed on one side from the stroke it caused.   

i've spent a lot of time trying to understand self destructive behavior. i think we have a lot of pieces to the puzzle, even maybe enough to form the beginning of a picture. i don't think we have all the pieces to the puzzle though, so i don't think it's possible to completely understand.  i think at this point it comes down to how we can thwart the behavior in our self, and help others who want to defeat it in their self. 

i have gone back and forth with moralizing behavior... guilt seems to work for some, not for others?  i don't use it, it seems delusional and hypocritical to me. The problem with moralizing is it's pretty easy to find destructive behavior is just about anyone. Morality seems a cultural construct to me. 

To me it comes down to the cost of 'pleasure' (not a perfect summary word, i know).  People using Tina use it because of the pleasure it brings them, but to me, you don't get a great return on your investment.  Sort of like jumping out of a plane without a parachute.  There is the thrill of flying, but it doesn't last very long. 

i can come up with all sorts of analogies, but i don't believe the choice to use Tina (or engage in any self destructive behavior) is rational. i believe the choice is based on wanting to create or recreate a feeling. i think that becomes a drive that is not easily overcome with rationale. 

In my opinion (and that's all it is or is worth lol), one of the more successful methods to overcome destructive behavior is substitution. i think submissivebottom hits on it when he talks about keeping "busy."   We also substitute heroin with methadone, or diet Coke for regular Coke or baked potato chips with fried. 

Insightful words. I have always found it extremely hot to be a pig but to maintain control of your life. I find it so averse to be around people who are for lack of a better word a “hot mess”. 

[Guest nelly26]

I think they use Tina because they want to escape from something. 

[evilqueerpig]

Having seen what meth can do to guys, I only parTy on rare occasions and never more than I can handle.

[Truversebb]

3 hours ago, evilqueerpig said:

Having seen what meth can do to guys, I only parTy on rare occasions and never more than I can handle.

I’m willing to take you at your word on your controlled use. However I’m sure those same words or similar are said by those who are in fact regular users who are on their way to rock bottom. One of my ex friends who hit bottom the hardest insisted he was only a “casual user”(his words), up until the day he lost his good paying job, got evicted and sold his BMW to pay back his dealer. 

[PhoenixTriad]

We are burying our son tomorrow due to an overdose.  Addicts stop using in only one of two ways.  And most of the time its in the way we are grieving.

[Monster5-8gPA]

Very sorry for your loss! 

[Truversebb]

16 minutes ago, PhoenixTriad said:

We are burying our son tomorrow due to an overdose.  Addicts stop using in only one of two ways.  And most of the time its in the way we are grieving.

So very sorry for you. Just awful.

[Cdexter]

I have a friend that used to live in NYC that got hooked on it bad he called me one day crying and asked for help said he couldnt go on living that way. Of course i said yes I bought him a bus ticket to MO to come live with me and took care of him. Got him cleaned up and healthy yes he did do it a couple times yet and i closely watched him with it and if he started getting out of hand with it i talked to him and realled him back in from it. About two years after he moved here he hooked up with a guy and moved in with him and got back into it the guy hurt him and tried to pimp him out and make him do stuff for drugs n money he called me and i went and got him he was hurting so bad emotionally i asked him if he needed some to help him and he said yes me and him smoked it that night first time i had done any but i did it with him and it help bring him back from the brink of suecide knowing i was there for him no matte what.  Hes now clean and healthy again and just got a job im so very proud of him i know he will always battle with it and slip now n then but friends have to be there for them to make sure they are in control not the meth. Please watch ur friend and be there no matter what.

[drscorpio]

3 hours ago, PhoenixTriad said:

We are burying our son tomorrow due to an overdose.  Addicts stop using in only one of two ways.  And most of the time its in the way we are grieving.

So very sorry for your loss.  ❤️

[nvanguy1]

On 12/28/2018 at 6:53 PM, PhoenixTriad said:

We are burying our son tomorrow due to an overdose.  Addicts stop using in only one of two ways.  And most of the time its in the way we are grieving.

My deepest condolences ?

[Guest BBBoyfromTN]

I've known guys who've used it recreationally and those who've gotten hopelessly addicted to it. Thinking you have "control" over it is illusory at best. From what I've heard from guys who use it, it heightens and intensifies what sex feels like. The problem is, when you have sex and you aren't on it, the sex is not good and its harder to get to the point of orgasm. For some guys it ruins sex and they have to do Tina to feel the same way about sex. It becomes this vicious cycle. Now mind you, that's not the case for everyone. For some guys it makes them far hornier and the sex more intense. I'm not gonna lie...I've done it a few times and yeah...the sex was intense and it made me horny as fuck and I lost control over my desires. That's probably why guys like it...it gets rid of inhibitions. But I've never had many inhibitions so that wasn't why enjoyed it. It was how it made me feel. But I knew I couldn't do it regularly or it would be a problem as I have a very addictive personality. I also lost my older brother to meth. He got on meth and fell into a pretty crazy group of friends. He wound up doing meth all the time, started dealing it, trading it for sex with girls and guys. He started going to sex parties with girls and guys and would up getting pozzed. He got busted, jailed, went to rehab, and predictably wound up doing meth again. He wouldn't take his meds, didn't care about his health, and just started a downward spiral. He wound up with full blown AIDS and it and the meth destroyed his mind. He started doing heroin too and died of an OD at 27. Mind you, not everyone who does Tina is going to wind up a full-blown addict but if you think you can control it and it won't take over your life you're probably wrong. I have guys I've known who've gotten sucked into that lifestyle and honestly, I rarely hear from them because they get so absorbed in that sex and drugs lifestyle. Some can hold down a job but once they're done with work its PNP time. I visited one of the guys and their apartment was absolutely disgusting...it hadn't been cleaned with what looked like weeks, no food in the fridge, they looked like shit, had lost a lot of weight and their bedroom was truly fucking scary....cum crusted sheets that hadn't been washed in a while, the room smelled like cum, ass, and lube. Other folks tweaking wouldn't care but anyone who didn't would probably flee. If I had to guess they're probably poz and don't know it or don't care. It's scary shit man...