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Neg bottom NOT looking to be pozzed, BUT.....


SWbottomDC

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I've been a lurker here for some time, but not really posted much.  I'm bisexual, date only girls, but also realize that my TRUE role in sex is to be used and then tossed aside by men, preferably anonymously.  But i seem to be different than a lot of guys here.  I don't WANT to be poz.  I don't seek out poz loads, and if a guy doesn't tell me his status, i cross my fingers are hope to hell he's neg or undetectable.  That all said, i won't turn away a top who want to use me to get off either.  Whether he discloses his status or not, i'll take his load because it's my role, and i genuinely want guys to feel good using me, and have no problem tossing me aside like trash once they get off.

I've been bred before over the last few years, but not a ton.  I'm still neg, not taking prep, but willing to risk it for guys that genuinely don't give a shit what they give me.  Are there any other guys like me here, who genuinely do NOT want to be poz, will NOT seek it out, greatly prefer that the top is neg, but will 100% willingly give up their hole no matter what?

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I just wanted to answer what @cumfilme wrote. Honestly, I understand the thrill of the possibility of being pozzed, because before my prep times I felt the same. But I don’t want the feeling of anxiety while I was waiting for the results of my actual std test. Now, if you take your pills you won’t die just because you have HIV, and you can avoid AIDS, but it’s just a disease. Somehow and somewhere your body is not healthy. So, I don’t want to be pozzed. Nevertheless, I love bareback and I don’t enjoy condome anymore, so I’ve gone to taking prep. With prep, you loose only the thrill if you’re getting pozzed or not. I think it’s not a big price for the enjoyment of bareback. 

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Thanks for the replies.  I guess for me, taking Prep feels like a cheat.  Don't get me wrong, it makes sense.  But for me, i feel like i'm supposed to let what happens, happen.  I'm sure some stealthers that know this about someone might make them want to infect that bottom, but i just feel like it's my duty to let the top do what he wants, and not try to intervene in the process by taking a drug to prevent it.  It just feels wrong, for some reason.

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  • Moderators

If you are willfully choosing not to take PrEP and you are taking loads, you need to accept that on some level you want to be poz and/or think you deserve to be poz. 

 

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I'm a bottom and have been barebacking for years, have never turned a guy down. I had absolutely no desire or want to be pozzed. And it sucked because I wasn't able to get on PrEP as my insurance wouldn't cover it and I didn't qualify for any of the financial help available. But thankfully last month my insurance company started covering it. I was in my doctors office the very first day asking for it. It took almost a month to finally get it in my hands. I though for sure that I was going to get pozzed those last 30 days,  But it still didn't stop me from getting fucked raw anonymously.

Dude, if it's available to you, get on PrEP! Being poz is no badge of honor.



 

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7 hours ago, billy said:

Dude, if it's available to you, get on PrEP! Being poz is no badge of honor.

exacly.  I don't want to be rude to guys who are looking for conversion, I don't want to get sick.  

Being on Prep free my mind of the next morning questions about what have happend and help me focus on the next men I'll serve.

 

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Guest Porthos

I've been poz for almost 12 years and I am fortunately healthy, undetectable with great health insurance. I never sought to get pozzed, but loved bareback, the intimacy of sharing I seed. The guy that knocked me up I'm convinced had no idea he was poz and unknowingly gave it to me...It was very hot sex and I still think about the fact that his DNA is forever in me. I do however remember the anxiety of wondering if I was poz and when I finally got my test results I was not surprised but still shocked and numb for a week. After it settled in I did become more relaxed and relished in the fact that the anxiety was gone.

That being said, if I was not already poz I would definitely be on PrEP...All the fun, intensity, spontaneity that bareback brings is still there without the HIV. 

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I would have up-voted both skylon's and Veytoss replies, but I guess can't add any more reactions today. (Didn't even know that was a thing).

Skylon, may you forever be healthy, undetectable and happy!

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Dude, I'm just like you, date women, but love sex with me.

Get on PrEP and quit worry about taking loads.  Yes, there is always a slight chance you'll get pozzed, but you have a much higher chance of getting hit by a car going to meetup with your fuck.

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im exactly same as the owner of this thread - i dont use PreP but i really am starting to want to - the irony is that i have read about it damaging kidneys and such and I am weary to use it, yet i am continuously wanting to go bare and not be worried. An aggressive top i know who is on it wants to take my ass and i badly want to let him. I feel the whole shame thing for asking my doctor at the health clinic, I know i shouldnt but urgh... just taking raw loads and not having fear of HIV would be so damn good.

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On 3/11/2020 at 11:26 AM, parvenu said:

 just taking raw loads and not having fear of HIV would be so damn good.

Oh it is!!  I was nervous as hell when I asked my Doc to put me on it, then I had to tell him what it was etc, my embarrassment quickly turned anger when I realized he had no clue about it.

Don't let a little embarrassment hold you back

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