hntnhole Posted February 13, 2022 Report Share Posted February 13, 2022 On 2/11/2022 at 12:15 PM, tallslenderguy said: i don't question the sincerity of this, but i do question the notion that sex is ever a "purely...physical act?" Which is not to minimize the physical part of it, but we are also mental and emotional beings. You and I are on the same page, tallslenderguy. Yes, there is the purely physical (and usually Lust-driven) act, which is a necessary act we are compelled to indulge in. I also believe that there is a deeper, even more satisfying level of exchange beyond merely Breeding. I have experienced it a number of times, and it's real for me. That kind of "mating" is always so very special when it occurs !! 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 13, 2022 Report Share Posted February 13, 2022 I'm gay because I am sexually attracted to men and love gay sex. I am poz, but I wasn't chasing. It happened because I loved bareback sex. Always felt so much better, loved the spontaneity and loved the intimacy of sharing semen with a man. Getting pozzed was just a result of all of the above Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tallslenderguy Posted February 13, 2022 Report Share Posted February 13, 2022 14 minutes ago, hntnhole said: You and I are on the same page, tallslenderguy. Yes, there is the purely physical (and usually Lust-driven) act, which is a necessary act we are compelled to indulge in. I also believe that there is a deeper, even more satisfying level of exchange beyond merely Breeding. I have experienced it a number of times, and it's real for me. That kind of "mating" is always so very special when it occurs !! Yeah, i sure has been my experience and it makes me want it more. Sex is so amazing and has endless potential. i think many don't ever pursue or discover that the pool has a deep end. There are so many things that energize our drive to have sex with each other, "things" that go beyond physical sensation and pleasure, that conch to those pleasures and sensation and add layers to them. For instance, just like we connect and bond physically when the symbiosis between a Top/bottom happens, there can also be connecting and bonding between a need to control and a need to be controlled, a need to penetrate emotionally and a need to be penetrated emotionally, a need to possess and a need to be possessed... i think the list can be endless, but it's not generic. We are individuals and those connections and bonding experiences depend on discovery of compatible needs/desires. For that to happen, we need to have self knowledge and develop skills of communication. It's work, but the rewards are fuckng awesome. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tallslenderguy Posted February 13, 2022 Report Share Posted February 13, 2022 19 minutes ago, dasher said: I'm gay because I am sexually attracted to men and love gay sex. I am poz, but I wasn't chasing. It happened because I loved bareback sex. Always felt so much better, loved the spontaneity and loved the intimacy of sharing semen with a man. Getting pozzed was just a result of all of the above Right? We are often unconsciously influenced by cultural conditioning. i didn't get the flu because i was not chasing it, i just got exposed and caught it when i went to the grocery store to get food, because i need to eat to live. A virus is opportunistic. It needs a host to replicate and survive. HIV is a virus that connects to a host to survive, that's pretty much a parasitic dynamic. We also have 10x more bacteria living in us than we have cells that make up our body, some of those bacteria are beneficial and we live together symbiotically, others are just using us and make us sick. We are all part of nature and the trick is to survive, and even flourish. Chasing is getting fucked and impregnated by a virus, not another person. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hntnhole Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 On 2/13/2022 at 9:20 AM, tallslenderguy said: "things" that go beyond physical sensation and pleasure For instance, the mental imagery of my Cock actually imbedded in the bottom's brain .... quite literally, the proverbial "mind-fuck". It seldom happens in a group scene, but usually later - individually - with a guy I fucked in a group scene. It's like metaphorically consuming the bottom's mind, heart, soul - and offering mine to him. It's so gratifying to read replies from guys that understand ... 😉 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tallslenderguy Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 6 minutes ago, hntnhole said: For instance, the mental imagery of my Cock actually imbedded in the bottom's brain .... quite literally, the proverbial "mind-fuck". It seldom happens in a group scene, but usually later - individually - with a guy I fucked in a group scene. It's like metaphorically consuming the bottom's mind, heart, soul - and offering mine to him. It's so gratifying to read replies from guys that understand ... 😉 It is, and for me, encouraging. there are simultaneously similarities and differences between what a Top feels and what a bottom feels. For instance, using Your example, both natures will be nurtured (similarity) but from opposite ends (difference). i have literally experienced a Top imbedding HIs "Cock" in my mind. i see that as one of many forms of impregnation, which i see as one of the natural, driving forces/needs that can connect and bond a Top with a bottom As i see it, a Top has (among many other things) a 'creative' need to plant Himself in another (perpetuate Himself?) and a bottom (at least this bottom) has a creation need to be planted, molded, even possessed by a Man. It's not a possession that displaces, but does sort of take control... by choice and desire on my part as a bottom. It's not force or capitulation, but a purposeful submissive response to someone very 'right.' lol, i could go on and on, this turns me on so much. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hntnhole Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 Go ahead - go on and on .... Dullness = no interest Mediocrity = perhaps momentary interest, mostly in the fuckjoints where intellect counts for very little Intelligence = interest, focus, pleasure .... and he's paying attention too ... he's shameless, but so is the guy he's attached to ... 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hntnhole Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 <<<sigh>>> tossed in the "reaction" clink ... again ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baretop4ever Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 (edited) It’s also tough for me to fit into one of those categories. In terms of “gay lifestyle”, It is tough for me to get what is actually meant with that. As we see in this thread, many interpret that term differently, as I do, and I agree with every kind of interpretation made so far … I love to frequent happening places (gay resorts, Bathhouses, cruising areas, clubs, bars, Gay organizations which are not connected to sex in the first place) but mostly to meet like-minded men, for the sake of enjoying same activities coming from the same motivation. And I appreciated that gay scene throughout my early years after coming out for being a refuge for someone who grew up in a small village with hardly any fellow gay men to exchange with before, and I’m happy to welcome the younger ones of today the same way as I have been welcomed once when I was young and insecure. But is it a “lifestyle”? It’s rather a part of my life, since my life consists of more than just “gay things”, no matter how much I love them. For me it’s not about having sex for the sake of gay lifestyle (however you would define it)… rather looking out for gay themed events or gatherings for the sake of those, but Having said that, I’m the first one to undo my buckle if I meet anyone at those places who happens to be as horny as I am and would be ready for a fuck, whenever my dick reacts and sex drive awakens. But that could happen at any other place as well, if opportunity arises, no matter what kind of “lifestyle” I’m engaged with. what drives me the most about sex is the sex drive itself, and integrate it into my personal lifestyle. Just like integrating any other primary interests in your life. Having said that, you never know where that leads you to. Because... On 2/13/2022 at 2:47 PM, hntnhole said: On 2/11/2022 at 6:15 PM, tallslenderguy said: i don't question the sincerity of this, but i do question the notion that sex is ever a "purely...physical act?" Which is not to minimize the physical part of it, but we are also mental and emotional beings. You and I are on the same page, tallslenderguy. Yes, there is the purely physical (and usually Lust-driven) act, which is a necessary act we are compelled to indulge in. I also believe that there is a deeper, even more satisfying level of exchange beyond merely Breeding. I have experienced it a number of times, and it's real for me. That kind of "mating" is always so very special when it occurs !! True, absolutely. Many encounters remain anonymous, and they still benefit a lot more, as already mentioned here. I love to be used, as some have stated here as well, just with the feature in my case as a top that I love being used as a breeder and cum provider. Sex with various nameless strangers is for me additionally a social connection with like-minded men and it fulfills me to practice that connection through sex. The fulfillment that a bottom provides me, and that I hopefully provide him (it means something to me to leave my encouragement in the shape of my seed in him), and the reassurance that we are what we are, and that we're fuckin' great at that. I’m eating out of it even for days after the encounters and just feel energized. Also by randomly copulating we can be for one another companions with the same goal, brothers in arms, maybe lovers just for the moment, share a taste of those sentiments just for the moment without exchanging a word, just flashes of feelings within that out-of-this-world-moments of intercourse. At the end of the day, it was still just a random fuck, ignited by pure horniness, with someone I'm never to meet again, but even a random fuck with a faceless bottom can have a long lasting effect. And every once in a while a Fuck partner ends up becoming a friend, a long-term buddy or even a lover. So there are various reasons to have sex, but sex drive rules first and i’m dick driven in the first place, keeping in mind that the first fuck with someone can have the potential to be the beginning of a journey with him. Coming back to above, could it seem that certain guys fit into those three categories you’ve listed up since it’s a virtual world, where many people communicate differently than in real life…? at least I’ve understood that you are talking about guys you met here in this forum. I believe some people focus online on certain things much more, like being pozzed or being into drugs. I suppose it would be totally different if you would meet those very same people in real life, where you would recognize many more facets about them. Edited February 16, 2022 by Baretop4ever 4 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baretop4ever Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 On 2/12/2022 at 6:11 PM, BlackDude said: It seems like there is just less sex gay happening. You would think it would be the opposite with Prep and the Internet. I meant at least two-thirds of the men who hit me up are looking for “head only.” Exactly, I noticed the same. Even here it’s the difference how people present themselves online and face-to-face. On dating apps I met guys who were fond of meeting to have sex and when we finally met and were supposed to go for the real thing, they were like “Oh it’s not all about sex, there are more important things in life, let’s just get to know each other first and have a coffee and talk!” And I’m like: why are you actually wasting my time?? The options to actually practice fuck'n'free sex (instead of just discussing it out online) where I live is changing, with dying out men only bars with attached dark rooms. I experience more and more loud voices of moralizing gay couples attached to heteronormative lifestyle who shame single gay men who love to live dick driven. It’s also irritating when fellow gay men degrade activities like cruising as something for "second class people", and I get the feeling this criticism is voiced more and more, forgetting that cruising was a refuge for men who needed sex with men in times when it was less accepted or even punishable, and forgetting that cruising is a tradition on its own that supported gay emancipation and helped to keep it alive and reassured many gay men that they are what they are. 4 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackDude Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 2 hours ago, Baretop4ever said:I experience more and more loud voices of moralizing gay couples attached to heteronormative lifestyle who shame single gay men who love to live dick driven. Well since you brought it up…. I agree 100%. Turns out the “gay rights movement” wasn’t all about liberation or free choice. To many, it was about being accepted by straight society (who will never really accept them). You’d think we’d be at an all time level of sex and piginess. Instead we got a lot of older people bitter about prep so they refuse to be educated fully, and a bunch of youngsters who all think that are 10s because of the Internet. I enjoy coming to this site because it reminds me there are places gay guys can still express my opinions about sex and your experiences freely. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ronnie4u Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 I remember being young and older guys enjoyed me being around - usually some drinking - laughter - videos or more than 2 older males enjoyed touching me ! Then , the sexual fucking raw loads - poppers and having fun - I could go either way - really enjoyed seeing guys dressing sexually - hard erections - dicks busting out - my Faults are poppers - weed - drinking and seeing - staring at erections ! Sometimes if the delivery man comes - dropping off a box - meeting him at the door - I squat and stare at his crotch - sometimes it happens GOOD times - sometimes he ask it he could use my bath room - I peek inside seeing - asking - is everything OK ? then it happens ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hntnhole Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 12 hours ago, Baretop4ever said: I experience more and more loud voices of moralizing gay couples attached to heteronormative lifestyle who shame single gay men who love to live dick driven Well .... here in Florida, this pie-faced fool of a Governor has begun a campaign to bar the teaching of any gay-related subject matter in public schools. The slogan is "Don't Say Gay", as if merely verbalizing the word can turn kids gay. I'm sorry to know the bars w/those thrilling darkrooms are fading away, but at least you don't have the person running your Province mounting campaigns to marginalize boys & girls born gay !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BannedWord Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 13 hours ago, Baretop4ever said: On dating apps I met guys who were fond of meeting to have sex and when we finally met and were supposed to go for the real thing, they were like “Oh it’s not all about sex, there are more important things in life, let’s just get to know each other first and have a coffee and talk!” And I’m like: why are you actually wasting my time?? It’s also irritating when fellow gay men degrade activities like cruising as something for "second class people", and I get the feeling this criticism is voiced more and more, forgetting that cruising was a refuge for men who needed sex with men in times when it was less accepted or even punishable, and forgetting that cruising is a tradition on its own that supported gay emancipation and helped to keep it alive and reassured many gay men that they are what they are. I suspect there are two different dynamics at work here @Baretop4ever. Perhaps three. Guys who just want to hookup and enjoy sex and getting off with other guys. Guys who talk about it to see if there's common ground, but their overall goal is that they want some sort of ongoing situation if they share (or think they share) chemistry. Guys who flake-out when faced with the real prospect of sex with someone else and while the conversation originally may have been hot and heavy, the reality hits and they're afraid of diving into that deep end of the pool. Sounds like you managed to find the second and third bullets on that list. I can be #1 or #2 above, but it's the guys who are in that other category that drive me nuts. It's why I'm drawn to cruising guys and enjoying what happens. Everyone knows they're there to hookup and it's just lust and about enjoying someone for a while. If I'm talking with someone online and the conversation is going well, of course I want to know them more. But I'll still want to fuck anyone in both categories. The flakes you describe just grind my gears. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tallslenderguy Posted February 16, 2022 Report Share Posted February 16, 2022 12 hours ago, Baretop4ever said: The options to actually practice fuck'n'free sex (instead of just discussing it out online) where I live is changing, with dying out men only bars with attached dark rooms. I experience more and more loud voices of moralizing gay couples attached to heteronormative lifestyle who shame single gay men who love to live dick driven. It’s also irritating when fellow gay men degrade activities like cruising as something for "second class people", and I get the feeling this criticism is voiced more and more, forgetting that cruising was a refuge for men who needed sex with men in times when it was less accepted or even punishable, and forgetting that cruising is a tradition on its own that supported gay emancipation and helped to keep it alive and reassured many gay men that they are what they are. One thing that seems a constant throughout history is there has always been bullies, people who are certain their way of living/being should be the standard for everyones way of living. i don't think it's because they are hetero or religious or__________, to me it's a matter of immaturity. For instance, i think some religions become a refuge for narrow, immature bullies. If one is born into such a culture, and their nature doesn't fit, they can become conditioned against their self. Imagine being born gay and growing up with Mike Pence for a father. Even in an era of open acceptance of gays, that would not be that persons reality. i grew up in a religion that kept me psychologically bound for a big part of my life and literally tried to de-gay me. It was a long, hard journey for me to process out of the "moralizing" you reference, and the underpinning notions that support 'moralizing' ways. my process taught me to question and examine the norm. i've quipped before on BZ that being gay saved me from "God." While stuck in that religion, i could still not change or escape who i am and you are spot on with your observation that "cruising... reassured many gay men they are what they are." For me, it was my only form of affirmation, and i am sure that is true about many who were (and are) in similar positions. People want acceptance and i think some believe the illusion that conformity makes them acceptable. It doesn't. That conformity is also suppression and repression of who one really is. It's the proverbial "closet." 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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