Why the racial preference?

[BlackDude]

Just now, Cumhose said:

That is a looking time to wait for Black dick lol. Did you fuck him?

Lol hell no. And it has nothing to do with age. 

I didn’t even respond. I didn’t block either. So I’m leaving the door open for him to wonder. 

Let him go find the guys he preferred at 28, 38 and 48.

[Guest Cumhose]

1 minute ago, BlackDude said:

Lol hell no. And it has nothing to do with age. 

I didn’t even respond. I didn’t block either. So I’m leaving the door open for him to wonder. 

Let him go find the guys he preferred at 28, 38 and 48.

Lmao 

[BlackDude]

2 minutes ago, Cumhose said:

Lmao 

Man that shit was pathetic.  As if I was suppose to be honored. Got me waaaay fucked up. Hahaha

Edited March 3, 2021 by BlackDude

[Guest Cumhose]

13 minutes ago, BlackDude said:

Man that shit was pathetic.  As if I was suppose to be honored. Got me waaaay fucked up. Hahaha

Oooooo I didn't know that he had that tone. Yeah dudes with that attitude get ignored real quick. I like all ages, but I don't do shitty attitudes.

[biinmsp]

On 2/15/2021 at 3:22 PM, YourNoLimitsBottom said:

I have no preferences. But I do enjoy the encounters that stimulate my senses. Seeing hands on my body that are a contrast to my own skin tone excites me. Imagining the contrast that what we look like from above as his hands grip my hips and his cock is moving in and out as he fucks me doggy. Imagining what he is seeing as I bob up and down on his pole as I kneel in front of him... yeah, these visual differences, whether distinct or nuanced, get my inner slut's motor running.

In the end, we are all in the same category: guys. And all guys and cocks and asses should be celebrated for their differences. Be sure to enjoy a wide variety!

This is the best description of why I like sex with black men, or looking at interracial porn. Sex is good, but I love the stimulation.

[CumBustion]

On 2/28/2021 at 9:31 PM, find91 said:

Some racial preferences is because is a result of racism and being a racial fetish. A lot of brothers will only hookup with other black men because they are tired of dealing with racist, the harrassement and just being boiled down to BBC, by other races.

Personally, I despise being treated or considered a fetish.

Totally feel you on this one. I really didn’t realize how bad the tropes thrown at me were until I noticed the patterns were super predictable. All the “Me so horny”, “You be better as a ladyboy”, “You sucky-sucky”, <insert what ever tired Asian sex stereotype here> lines were too much. I didn’t feel comfortable playing the typical Azn sub twink, but I also figured that I can’t change people’s minds either. So, I decided to use those notions to my advantage (sugar daddies with an azn fetish, etc). But just know that if they treat me in that fashion, they won’t get everything I have to offer.

[parvenu]

everyone has racial preferences or preferences of some kind. I think just as we slipped into a weird hyper vigilant / exhibitionist society we all suddenly act like what we privately do is the business of others. It's a fetish for antagonism and the good ol' R word to appear. I often notice such conversations from smug faggots that you clearly know are perverts deep down but wont admit it.

[BlackDude]

90% of the time, when we talk about preference (which is different from racism) it’s white guys just preferring to be with white guys. And that’s okay!

And I won’t speak with any other race, but I really wish alot of black men would stop literally begging these preferences white guys for attention or even worse a pity fuck.

 

If he doesn’t want you, move on. Sure, they’ll call you bitter (even tho they don’t want you but I digress) but at least you’ll spend your time looking for guys who want to fuck. 

[fskn]

I think some people deny reality.

Except when you're putting your dick through a glory hole or wearing a blindfold and getting fucked by any and all cocks (both fun activities, though as a top I've only experienced the former), of course you are determining whom you find attractive and whom you don't! Supposedly, this split-second decision is an evolutionary response that helps heterosexuals find the healthiest mates with which to reproduce.

For some animals, the criteria are simple: brighter feathers, bigger body parts, or a louder mating call.

In humans, the list of criteria is endless. We apply some criteria consciously, but others, we aren't even aware of. Skin color, and/or the traits we associate with it in countries like the US where race is (unfortunately) central to the society, are probably at least on the subconscious list, if not on the conscious list, for most of us.

I don't think we can explain away racial criteria, let alone wish them away, in the complex, instantaneous, and highly individual process of determining whom we find attractive.

Instead, why not focus on discovering and acknowledging the attractiveness criteria that we do apply, on figuring out whether those criteria help us to select for better social and sexual experiences (or not), and, most of all, on making sure that we apply attractiveness criteria in ways that satisfy us while doing as little harm as possible to other people?

Skin color is like height, eye color, and other apparent traits: it cannot be changed. Weight is similar: major, sustained change is unlikely.

We can choose to keep the immutable traits we dislike, to ourselves. Rejection always hurts, but you can reject a short person (if you dislike short people) as painlessly as is possible by not answering the person's message or tap. If you had put "no shorties" in your profile or if you responded with "[Sorry, / Thanks, but] I don't fuck/date/chat with short people" — whether out of fake vicarious concern or just callousness — you would be blaming and shaming the other person (a) for not meeting a criterion that is yours (in your own mind / not universal) and (b) for having a trait that they couldn't change even if changing to suit you made sense and if they wanted to change!

Sticking to positive preference statements in profiles isn't the answer, either. For example, saying that you like Black and Latino men could mean, by extension, that you don't like Asians. The toxic effect on people who don't qualify is the same.

On 3/2/2021 at 4:55 PM, BlackDude said:

... I believe all hook up and dating sites should have an algorithm or a software that automatically inputs people’s preferences in for them Based on the type of people they respond to and how many times. And those Preferences should be locked in and unchangeable by the time a guy turns 40 or is over 200 or so pounds. ...

@BlackDude has a unique insight. Decisions about attractiveness are so quick and complex that we are not always able to articulate our own criteria. Observation — having Grindr, dating apps, etc. tabulate the features of the people we respond to most (and least) — would give each of us a better sense of our preferences.

(However, @BlackDude suggests that our observed preferences be locked in. I disagree. For me, this is a descriptive exercise, not a normative one. Preferences don't have to be symmetric. It's OK for old people to like young people; there's some evolutionary biology at work there, at least as far as fertility is concerned, for heteros. It's OK for fat people to like thin people. It's OK for our preferences to change as our own bodies age, as we meet people with different features than we were used to, etc. Symmetry is OK, too. It's fine, and probably quite natural, for some people to select other people who look the same, talk in familiar ways, have similar socio-economic status, etc. It's all OK, as long as we don't shame others for not being what we want and for having traits that they couldn't change even if they wanted to.)

[BootmanLA]

32 minutes ago, fskn said:

Rejection always hurts, but you can reject a short person (if you dislike short people) as painlessly as is possible by not answering the person's message or tap. If you had put "no shorties" in your profile or if you responded with "[Sorry, / Thanks, but] I don't fuck/date/chat with short people" — whether out of fake vicarious concern or just callousness — you would be blaming and shaming the other person (a) for not meeting a criterion that is yours (in your own mind / not universal) and (b) for having a trait that they couldn't change even if changing to suit you made sense and if they wanted to change!

The only part of your (well-written and reasoned) post that I have a quibble with is this. I'm not saying people HAVE to respond to any message from someone who's interested in you, but it's possible to respond politely but firmly with a negative and not hurt the other person's feelings, unless they're irrationally sensitive.

"Thank you, I appreciate the interest, but I don't think we're really a match" is polite, to the point, and should be (for any reasonable person) a clear statement that there's no point in further pursuit. It avoids going into the reasons - and generally, there's nothing to be gained by explaining those reasons. If the pursuer insists, a repeated "I'm sorry, but just not interested. Have a good night [day/evening/afternoon]" should put an end to it. Anything beyond that is worthy of blocking, because you tried to be polite.

At least with such a response, no one can claim they didn't know. 

[JamesL100]

13 minutes ago, BootmanLA said:

"Thank you, I appreciate the interest, but I don't think we're really a match" is polite, to the point, and should be (for any reasonable person) a clear statement that there's no point in further pursuit. It avoids going into the reasons - and generally, there's nothing to be gained by explaining those reasons.

Same way that a job rejection is also usually quite short. And we don't know the reasons - to do with ourselves or the merits of other applicants. Just have to move on to the next job application.

[1000GUYS]

54 minutes ago, JamesL100 said:

Same way that a job rejection is also usually quite short. And we don't know the reasons - to do with ourselves or the merits of other applicants. Just have to move on to the next job application.

do you let any man apply cum inside you?

[BlackDude]

2 hours ago, fskn said:

I think some people deny reality.

Except when you're putting your dick through a glory hole or wearing a blindfold and getting fucked by any and all cocks (both fun activities, though as a top I've only experienced the former), of course you are determining whom you find attractive and whom you don't! Supposedly, this split-second decision is an evolutionary response that helps heterosexuals find the healthiest mates with which to reproduce.

For some animals, the criteria are simple: brighter feathers, bigger body parts, or a louder mating call.

In humans, the list of criteria is endless. We apply some criteria consciously, but others, we aren't even aware of. Skin color, and/or the traits we associate with it in countries like the US where race is (unfortunately) central to the society, are probably at least on the subconscious list, if not on the conscious list, for most of us.

I don't think we can explain away racial criteria, let alone wish them away, in the complex, instantaneous, and highly individual process of determining whom we find attractive.

Instead, why not focus on discovering and acknowledging the attractiveness criteria that we do apply, on figuring out whether those criteria help us to select for better social and sexual experiences (or not), and, most of all, on making sure that we apply attractiveness criteria in ways that satisfy us while doing as little harm as possible to other people?

Skin color is like height, eye color, and other apparent traits: it cannot be changed. Weight is similar: major, sustained change is unlikely.

We can choose to keep the immutable traits we dislike, to ourselves. Rejection always hurts, but you can reject a short person (if you dislike short people) as painlessly as is possible by not answering the person's message or tap. If you had put "no shorties" in your profile or if you responded with "[Sorry, / Thanks, but] I don't fuck/date/chat with short people" — whether out of fake vicarious concern or just callousness — you would be blaming and shaming the other person (a) for not meeting a criterion that is yours (in your own mind / not universal) and (b) for having a trait that they couldn't change even if changing to suit you made sense and if they wanted to change!

Sticking to positive preference statements in profiles isn't the answer, either. For example, saying that you like Black and Latino men could mean, by extension, that you don't like Asians. The toxic effect on people who don't qualify is the same.

@BlackDude has a unique insight. Decisions about attractiveness are so quick and complex that we are not always able to articulate our own criteria. Observation — having Grindr, dating apps, etc. tabulate the features of the people we respond to most (and least) — would give each of us a better sense of our preferences.

(However, @BlackDude suggests that our observed preferences be locked in. I disagree. For me, this is a descriptive exercise, not a normative one. Preferences don't have to be symmetric. It's OK for old people to like young people; there's some evolutionary biology at work there, at least as far as fertility is concerned, for heteros. It's OK for fat people to like thin people. It's OK for our preferences to change as our own bodies age, as we meet people with different features than we were used to, etc. Symmetry is OK, too. It's fine, and probably quite natural, for some people to select other people who look the same, talk in familiar ways, have similar socio-economic status, etc. It's all OK, as long as we don't shame others for not being what we want and for having traits that they couldn't change even if they wanted to.)

No, I’m not into the whole gumbo pot “some like black, some like short, some like twinks we all have preferences! Racism, preferences it’s all the same!” 
 

Guys who won’t fuck twinks or red heads won’t attack or not hire twinks or redheads. But guys who don’t fuck black guys WONT hire blacks guys.

Thats another reason I say if you have a preference, put it out there. Don’t be ashamed or waste folks time. 

 

 

[descartes70817]

I genuinely cannot understand the point of racism or bigotry. I love getting a black cock to use my white pussy as hard as he wants. I've also had black men who wanted my wife cock in side them. Either way It's an experience you'll remember for life

[KindaBasic]

Why limit yourself?