Reading Men’s Bio on Grindr

[Philip]

Are you someone who reads people’s bio on Grindr (or any other app) or do you skip it entirely and go straight to sending them a message?

I’ve noticed that a lot of people don’t read the bios. Why is that?

I find it frustrating sometimes when guys ask me questions that I have clearly written on my bio. To me, it shows a lack of care and attention to detail. I like to read other people’s bio (when there is one) because, A, the way they write gives you clues about their personality, and B, provides starting conversational topics.

[BootmanLA]

I've never used Grindr, but being familiar with several similar apps, I will note that yes, I always read the profiles. Sometimes I'll miss something important - it happens - but I find it's an excellent way to weed out lots of people who are clearly not matches. 

And I'm very short and abrupt with people who demonstrate they didn't bother to read my profile before contacting me. I agree with you that failing to do so shows an appalling lack of attention.

[ErosWired]

I definitely read bios. It very often keeps me from wasting time and energy on trying to make a connection that has zero chance.  I might see a potential prospect, and the stats look good, but the text explains “Not really interested in older” - okay, then, not really a likely target.

”I love a man’s feet” - Nope.

”Looking for someone to cuddle with” - Run far away.

[vers top] “I really like to get fucked in all my holes” - Riiiight. Vers Top, you say?

”I’ll make you bleed” - You’ll have to catch me first.

”Love piss, gunge, filth” - We’re not compatible, thank you.

Any one of these conversations, once begun, could only end badly. Best to avoid them by spending just a couple of extra seconds reading the bio.

[Japbtm]

I like the hashtags they have, it irritates me that I still have the questions, “what are you into?” It pretty much clearly states… Bb Anon Rough DL .. plus my preference is Bottom.

I think those hashtags are awesome. Just got to wait for guys to start actively use them. 

What do you guys think of Grindr’s new hash tags? ### 

[viking8x6]

I read them. When they have anything there to read. Which is far too seldom on Grindr.

Sometimes I miss the days when only the intellectual elite were on the internet.

[Guest]

Personally I prefer an almost blank profile. If their title indicates that they're a bottom or into BB I'll msg them. I don't want to see their face, and if they have a filled out profile that's a turn off for me. It's only about them coming over or vice versa, me putting my load in them, and that's it. 

[ErosWired]

2 hours ago, dustysawblades said:

It's only about them coming over or vice versa, me putting my load in them, and that's it. 

My life would be so much easier if only it were ever that simple. But no, everybody’s got some little condition, quirk or hang-up. So instead of just arranging a hookup, we have to negotiate.

[gingerdaddyG]

17 hours ago, BootmanLA said:

I've never used Grindr, but being familiar with several similar apps, I will note that yes, I always read the profiles. Sometimes I'll miss something important - it happens - but I find it's an excellent way to weed out lots of people who are clearly not matches. 

And I'm very short and abrupt with people who demonstrate they didn't bother to read my profile before contacting me. I agree with you that failing to do so shows an appalling lack of attention.

So many guys don’t seem to read the bios. I do - saves wasting time ‘chatting’ - that’s if they’re being honest in the bio of course! But why do so many guys say ‘versatile’ when they’re actually looking to bottom?  And what about the ones who can’t spell? (As I’ve admitted in another post, I’m a dinosaur!)

[ejaculaTe]

6 hours ago, gingerdaddyG said:

And what about the ones who can’t spell? (As I’ve admitted in another post, I’m a dinosaur!)

When discrete instead of discreet began to appear in profiles, I figured the end of civilization was nigh on upon us. The guys who don't remember that last week they asked you to unlock your pictures and are again asking (after the pictures were unlocked and seen) really grind my gears.

[Guest]

7 hours ago, gingerdaddyG said:

But why do so many guys say ‘versatile’ when they’re actually looking to bottom?

Hallelujah! I'm only half crazy. You are speaking the truth!!

You can add to that they usually always have a profile stating --- No Total Bttms --- 
It's especially fucked up when their profile also says -- I'm a Top ---.
 

[Guest]

7 hours ago, ErosWired said:

if only it were ever that simple. But no, everybody’s got some little condition, quirk or hang-up

 Thank you!  I thought I was the only one being put through the selection process.
You'd think they all work for the US Government there's so much red tape and questions.

[Guest]

To answer the posts question too, hell yes I read what's written.
I'm (obviously) never a fan of 1/2 the stuff written and especially when it seems to encourage some sort of exclusionary bad behavior.
I suck at writing any of my own and I always read others first before contacting them.

[fskn]

@Philip, I always read what's written, and I share your frustration about being asked to repeat information that's in my (fully filled-out) profile.

A particular pet peeve is repeating the obvious in profiles. If you're muscular or work out x times a week, we'll be able to tell from your photos. And if you have to say that you're a "nice guy", it probably means that you have been accused of not being nice. 

@ErosWired, I agree, specific profiles help avoid conversations that will be awkward and that won't go anywhere. "Just want to cuddle" often is a red flag, as is the blank profile or the model-quality torso marked "looking for friends".

@Japbtm, I love Grindr's new tags, but they really are just Tribes v2. Both generations of Grindr classifications suffer from the same design flaw: users don't know whether tribes and tags reflect what you are or what you are seeking in someone else.

I have had a paid Grindr subscription for several years now. It pays for itself in the time I save from being able to limit the "cascade" (the grid of people) to people who (a) are currently online and (b) not only have a pic, but a face pic, specifically. If I could also remove profiles with distance display turned off, I'd be ecstatic. I don't want to have to guess how far apart we are, and it's possible to find any Grindr user's exact location from the locations of nearby users — a scary possibility, but nevertheless true for any location-based system that sorts profiles in order by distance.

 

[fskn]

3 hours ago, ejaculaTe said:

The guys who don't remember that last week they asked you to unlock your pictures and are again asking (after the pictures were unlocked and seen) really grind my gears.

Unlike BBRTS, Scruff, Growlr and some others, Grindr doesn't have a notion of private profile photos whose lock/unlock status can be toggled for specific people. It does allow you to send arbitrary photos in private chats, and it caches all of the photos you've uploaded for potential use in that way in a single collection from which you can easily select when you want to send photos to a new person.

In fairness to people who ask you to unlock when you'd already unlocked your private photos for them in the past (BBRTS, Scruff, Growlr) or to send non-profile photos when you'd already sent some photos in the past (Grindr), these services don't always make it possible for people to see the history of such exchanges.

BBRTS, for example, deletes e-mails after a set period of time (measured in days, not months), so by the time you re-lock your private profile photos, people may not be able to see the e-mail message announcing that you had once unlocked for them.

Private chat history in Grindr is per-device unless you deliberately invoke the (fairly new) chat backup command. People with, for example, an iPhone and an iPad, can't see that you've chatted with them or sent photos before if they happen to be using the other device at the moment.

Worse yet, your record that you have sent a tap to another Grindr user disappears after 24 hours. The recipient can see a history of all taps received, but the sender cannot see a history of taps sent more than 24 hours ago. Scruff, for its part, lets free users see the list of people from whom they have received woofs, but only lets paid users see the list of people to whom they have sent woofs.

Unless one party takes the step of blocking, it is plausible that someone will tap (Grindr) or woof at (Scruff) the same person multiple times, days or weeks apart. Profile comments like "If I didn't answer the first time, take the hint" are gratuitous. If someone is so horrified by the prospect of being approached more than once, let him block after the first approach!

These services ought to function more like customer relationship management systems, which is really what they are. CRM systems are designed to assemble, maintain and show a complete, permanent, structured history of your interactions with each specific person.

[wyobtmbnk]

14 hours ago, dustysawblades said:

Personally I prefer an almost blank profile. If their title indicates that they're a bottom or into BB I'll msg them. I don't want to see their face, and if they have a filled out profile that's a turn off for me. It's only about them coming over or vice versa, me putting my load in them, and that's it. 

Perfect