why do tops care what a cumdump looks like?

[mguyone]

On 9/9/2023 at 3:05 PM, KylerIsTrash said:

I appreciate you bro. I ran into something like this last time I was at the bathhouse. I walked up to a dude and asked if he wanted to fuck. He said no and I kept moving. I figured I wasn’t what he was looking for. About 30 sec later he gets up and is like fuck I’ll breed you. Was one of the best fucks I had that night. He seemed real into it and thanked me for my hole after. Not sure why he initially said no. I probably wasn’t his usual type but we both ended up having a good time. 

I've had this happen and I felt the same way when I get first turned down.   But a guy that turned me down then ended up breeding me at a bookstore backroom later told me he really wanted to get bred but it hadn't worked out and he needed to go back to work.  He could tell I needed seed more so he figured unloading ion an ass was better than a hard on.   It made me realize like I'm there for something specific  sexually - they might be there for the same thing.  nothing to do with looks.  

[pervinmt]

Like others have stated, some of us live in conservative rural (ish) areas. Many guys worry about protecting their privacy by not hooking up with people they know. Or are embarrassed to have certain people find out who they truly are. 

[Close2MyBro]

On 9/9/2023 at 3:05 PM, KylerIsTrash said:

I appreciate you bro. I ran into something like this last time I was at the bathhouse. I walked up to a dude and asked if he wanted to fuck. He said no and I kept moving. I figured I wasn’t what he was looking for. About 30 sec later he gets up and is like fuck I’ll breed you. Was one of the best fucks I had that night. He seemed real into it and thanked me for my hole after. Not sure why he initially said no. I probably wasn’t his usual type but we both ended up having a good time. 

Years ago had this guy I would eyeball at the club every time he was there. No lie, he was out of my league but had nothing to lose. Tried to hit on him a couple of times with no luck. Continued to see him regularly at the club and just took a good glance and moved on. One night many months later as the club was closing and I was heading toward the door, I passed him. He asked me where I was headed and I told him I was going home, and he asked if he could join me and I said OK. Went back to my place and after some small talk he told me flat out I wasn't his type but he was horny as fuck and wanted to get off. I told him its cool and we got naked, and soon found out the sexual tension between us was undeniable and had some mind blowing sex. After we were done I figured he'd split and I'd be left with a memory. Instead he told me I was a hot fuck and asked for my number and I gave it to him. He told me we'd never be friends but he was down to fuck me and I said ok. I spent the next two years or so being his "fallback fuck", which was totally fine with me. I've got years of good memories instead of just one day.

[ellentonboy]

I believe that tops care, just as bottoms care, if they know other people are aware as to who they are playing with.  But when you get behind closed doors, no one is watching or aware, it's a much different story.

A bathhouse is as bad as sorority house.  People watching who goes in and out of your room.  But running into these guys going in or out of a bar, bookstore or even a bathhouse can be a much different story.  A chance encounter resulting in you hooking up, without others knowing, can lead to long term FWBs, and incredible sex.

Like other posters have mentioned, they may have initially been rejected, or even told "they could never be friends".  Well that's fine, because in the end that same guy is continuing to text or call you for a piece of ass.  In the end, that's what matters.

[cockfun69]

I've had a couple of guys who treated me as their fallback fuck and they were mighty pissed when I said I had another guy for the night they wanted!

I also have a half-a-lifelong friend who told me he didn't fancy me for sex but loved social times and chatting with me which I've very much valued.

Edited October 10, 2023 by JamesL100
changed to present tense in second para

[topblkmale]

To reiterate, its because some tops have a 'type' seeing that missionary and knowing how to ride the dick are what separates cum-dump-ass-up-doggy-style passive bottoms from professional power bottoms. There's a difference.

The trick is knowing which type of bottom you are.

[Close2MyBro]

29 minutes ago, JamesL100 said:

I also have a half-a-lifelong friend who told me he didn't fancy me for sex but loved social times and chatting with me which I've very much valued.

One of my best friends was a guy I met for a hook-up. We started chatting before having sex and realized we had a lot in common. We had sex and it was "ok" at best. We decided we made better friends and we've been close friends for more than 20 years now, and we still laugh at how bad the sex was between us.

[topblkmale]

On 9/3/2023 at 1:16 AM, ErosWired said:

 

There’s also that percentage of Tops who prefer missionary position - those Tops may want a preview because they’re going to have to look at that face while they’re fucking the body, and they want it to be at least tolerable.

 

Spot on! 👍

[phukhole]

Because some tops aren't always honest about what they want.  They SAY they want a sleazy, no-strings hook up with a  cumdump, but what they really want is to fuck someone vanilla LIKE they're a  cumdump.  I've had lots of guys tell me how hot the thought of a cumdump makes them, but then they never follow through.  I have a lot of tops tell me they want a loose sloppy hole, but they want to be the first load in my hole.

Other tops might not be able to get it up for just anyone and want to make sure that's not an issue.

It's hard to say really.  It could be a lot of things.  Me, once i realized that some of my best fucks were from tops that weren't "my type"  I realized just how much good sex I was missing out on.  Now, I'll take pretty much any load when I'm in those situations and they're generally better fucks than if I wait for someone I think is "pretty".  That goes the same for when I top. I'll fuck a lot of different men that I didn't used to consider "hot".  I've widened my parameters and find a lot of guys hot now.

[Close2MyBro]

6 minutes ago, phukhole said:

Because some tops aren't always honest about what they want.  They SAY they want a sleazy, no-strings hook up with a  cumdump, but what they really want is to fuck someone vanilla LIKE they're a  cumdump.

 

 

I've met some guys who don't want to fuck a pre-fucked hole, but do love to fuck a beat up hole that screams "cum-dump". I've also had some guys ask me to tell them about other guys who have fucked me while they're fucking me. I've just concluded that different things turn guys on at different times, or they're ok being the only fuck at that time fucking a guy who's been fucked by a ton of guys.

[ErosWired]

1 hour ago, phukhole said:

Because some tops aren't always honest about what they want.  They SAY they want a sleazy, no-strings hook up with a  cumdump, but what they really want is to fuck someone vanilla LIKE they're a  cumdump. 

Meeting other guys’ criteria is hard enough. Meeting their fantasy criteria is damn near impossible, especially when it’s all in their heads. I’m never under any illusion that a man who fucks me is doing it because he wants to fuck me - I’m just the warm flesh that stands in for what he’s seeing in his own mind.

[RealCute]

3 hours ago, Close2MyBro said:

One of my best friends was a guy I met for a hook-up. We started chatting before having sex and realized we had a lot in common. We had sex and it was "ok" at best. We decided we made better friends and we've been close friends for more than 20 years now, and we still laugh at how bad the sex was between us.

Interesting comment as my best friend of over 20 years started as a hookup as well I took a second look at your photo... L ol

[Close2MyBro]

6 minutes ago, RealCute said:

Interesting comment as my best friend of over 20 years started as a hookup as well I took a second look at your photo... L ol

I actually met him in Vegas of all places. I was in town on business for the week and he was a flight attendant staying overnight. We had met on AOL, he wasn't sure where they were going to book him but we ended up in the same hotel two doors away!

[leakyhole]

On 9/4/2023 at 11:42 PM, ErosWired said:

Or, because they require discretion. Or they’re sick to death of pic collectors. Or they have come to the conclusion that so many people use pics that aren’t of themselves that no one’s going to believe his pics are a real representation anyway. Or they’ve decided it’s not worth the risk of someone sextorting them with their images. There are many reasons why a guy may not choose to associate his image with his sexual habits online.

Very well said. I don't get why some gays just don't understand what discretion means and how does it relate to having no public pics on the apps💁‍♂️

[ErosWired]

On 10/10/2023 at 3:37 PM, topblkmale said:

Spot on! 👍

There’s a Top in Nashville who very specifically tells me, before he arrives, “I want you on your back when I walk in.” He’s also very specific that he wants the room dark. He either doesn’t need or doesn’t want to look at my face while he’s breeding me, and that’s fine. To be honest, if he was watching my face I probably wouldn’t be looking back much because he’s big fucks very thoroughly, and I have to focus on taking him while at the same time playing with his nipples, which he requires. I think he must prefer missionary because he’s going for continuous depth thrusting and maximum penetration at orgasm, and he keeps coming back because he can go all out in me.