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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_rights_in_Saudi_Arabia#Criminal_procedure A few highlights… I don't want my sites to be result in anything like those incidents. I just won't have it. And look, I get that people "make do" in bad environments. I grew up in a fundamentalist (Christian) environment. I literally went to Jerry Falwell's church/school/university for few years there and he was liberal compared to some of the other churches my parents took me to as a kid. And Middle Eastern Studies was my minor in university, and I wrote a pretty long paper back then on the unusual (from a western perspective) gender norms in traditional Arab culture. I get that there's a gay under current to things there. But when it goes wrong, it goes spectacularly wrong. And a western site, like this one, is more of a target than local things with an Arab approach to homosexuality. So I'm choosing to remove my sites from that mix. If Arabs want to use VPNs to get to get around the blocks, I can't stop them. But it's going to be a deliberate act on their part.

The only thing I plan on changing (when I have the time) is to present a page with a full reCAPTCHA dialog just before I ban the IP address. Otherwise, despite a few legit people being blocked here and there, my strategy has reduced Javascript-executing bot traffic on my sites from ~40% to 1-2%, so I'm happy with the overall results. That said, I have reduced significantly the ban lengths for certain types of things. So when a person is blocked it shouldn't last too long unless I think they've done something pretty serious (or several people in their immediate IP address range has done something serious).

The platform is a number of sites. They're being developed separately from this site – so different login, though your user name should already be reserved for you on the new platform. When the new platform is mature enough the content on this site will be moved to the new sites and this site will be redirected and eventually shut down. (That's years away, not months). Right now my sites are English only, which means they mostly cater to English speaking countries. Writing in other languages isn't allowed since I can't moderate the content in other languages. At some point I'll experiment with on-the-fly translation (similar to how Twitter does it). If I can get that to work then I'll support other languages and will (hopefully) have a more global audience. That said, Saudi Arabia is one of 9 countries which have the death penalty for being gay. I completely block those 9 countries from accessing sites on the new platform because I don't want someone to die simply for visiting one of my sites. If you choose to use a VPN that makes it appear like you're coming from somewhere else, that's your choice. But please remember many VPN services sell their data. The VPN doesn't necessarily make you safer. On top of that there are quite a few countries where homosexuality is illegal (but the penalty is less than death). For those countries I will severely restrict the geolocation features of the sites, which may render parts of the site non-functional. Again, I don't want someone going to jail for years simply for visiting one of my sites.

It's sorta too early to say what will happen. While other corona viruses do well in cold, dry environments (and hence do well in winter), we don't really know how much spring will reduce the spread of the virus because not enough is known about this strain. What does make sense is to prepare for it. I live in NYC. It will absolutely come here at some point. Avoiding big crowds is important – so no busy bars, ride a bike not the subway, do 1-on-1 hookups rather then a sex party, and so on. Also, learn to wash your hands frequently after being in public. Start being aware of when your hands touch your mouth/nose/eyes (it happens more than you think). And start stocking up on things that have a long shelf life that you'd use anyway – canned goods, pasta, frozen fish, etc. If panic hits those things will get much more expensive, so buying now is prudent. Face masks apparently only really help in that they reduce the number of times you touch your face. They also help if your sick so when you cough it doesn't spread as far. But with a 2% fatality rate and uncertainty about how to treat it, yes, you should start thinking and planning about corona virus – especially if you live in an urban area.

The cravings aren't going to go away. Just do it and let yourself enjoy the moment…

At the moment this site isn't really a hookup site. Ergo, finding a profile isn't really the point of the site. That said, the new platform will have hoookup site features which will start getting rolled in a month or two. I just need to get taxes filed, etc. then I'll have some time.

Are you a lawyer? Do you own or administer a site with 10s of thousands of users? I'm not sure what your qualifications are to make that statement. And saying that my statement is libelous is completely out-of-bounds. W icker, when mentioned on this site, was almost always associated with underage sex. I know, I moderated 100+ messages where it was used. Getting rid of it, got rid of a huge legal nightmare for me. Anyone who tries to get around the banning of the word will get suspended and if it's me doing the moderation at the moment, the points will not expire since there was clear intent to break the rules. (On stuff like this I'm much more harsh in my moderation than DrScorpio.)

W ickr is banned because it's almost always used to facilitate illegal activity or the discussion of illegal activity. I can't and won't have that here.

When I came out in college (30 years ago) the gay friend I came out to suggested I get into one of the university's gay men's counseling groups. Long story short the group I was in the 2nd semester discussed sexual abuse a fair amount. Many (most?) of the guys in the group had had sex with adults when they were kids. I grew up in a really sheltered environment – the idea that "statutory rape" was so widespread shocked me. It's that experience that makes me tend to not question the veracity of the guys telling the stories here. There's no wrong reaction to what they went through. Anger is fine, temporary depression is fine, and so is eroticising what they went through. It's their experience, no one else should tell them how they should deal with it. But yeah, I do wonder about the veracity of some of the stories, and I agree it's sorta gross to tell fake stories that cheapen what other people went through. But it's such a sensitive topic I'd only give an infraction for telling their story in a way that's too erotic. It's never my place to tell them it didn't happen.

You don't report people for BEING something. You report them for DOING something. There's a report option under every user-submitted post, message and picture on the site.

If anyone ever sees scat pics on this site, PLEASE report them. They are considered legally "obscene" and strictly forbidden from this site.

While hetero folks have very good reasons for bans on incest given the birth defects that happen when close relations have sex, the bottom line is that none of those problems exist for gay folks. Jessy and his brother can swap loads all day long and nothing bad will happen (at least nothing worse than if they had sex with strangers). Chronophilia is a thing. You don't have to be into it to accept that it's fine for other people to be into it. I have a friend who's really into guys who are 70+ years old. I wouldn't have sex with his boyfriend, but he's genuinely into the guy. Apparently it's pretty normal for girls to get their periods at 9 and 10 years old these days. I know it happened to my niece YEARS ago and wasn't normal then. Back then they traced it to the hormones in the Purdue chicken they were feeding their kids. They switched to organic meat and her periods stopped and came back at a normal age. But my husband's cousin's kid just had her first period at 10 and apparently most of the girls in her school are getting it around the same age. Point being – puberty is happening earlier. And I'd guess all the sexual feelings start earlier as well. But beyond that kids can be curious and it's not out of the realm of "normal" for them to be curious about their genitals (and the genitals of others). If they're not in a sexually repressed environment I suppose that could lead to sexual exploration before puberty. IMHO, it's harmful to label that explorarion "deviant" / "wrong" just because it happens to be sexual. Where problems come in is when adults get involved given the power dynamics between adults and kids. The statutory rape laws exist because too often damage is done, but not always.

No one should be embarrassed either about actual abuse or any of the sex they have willingly. I mean, yeah, sometimes the scene goes wrong to the point that it's embarrassing, but a general embarrassment about being abused or consensual sex? I don't endorse that type of normative sexual repression. My goal for the site is to help people get over their hangups about sex and approach their sex lives realistically and honestly. That's the only way people can have a healthy sex life. If talking about their early experiences gets them to that place, so be it.

FYI, I just did another batch of deletions. Took about an hour and a half to do ~300 deletions. The process had improved slightly. I was expecting it to take me longer.

We allow people to discuss what happened to them in a factual, non-erotic manner. It's also OK to have a clinical, non-erotic discussion of stories that are in the news (e.g. when pornstar Mike Dozer got convicted for having sex with a 14 year old). We do not allow perpetrators to tell their stories. If you see anything that violates those policies (too erotic, or told from the point of view of the perpetrator), please report it using the report button immediately below the offending post. We do impose pretty stiff infractions for people who go over the line. That said, my unscientific impression is that a surprising number of gay guys were abused as kids (using "abused" in the legal sense – a fair number of the "victims" don't see it as abuse). And people who start young tend to be pretty kinky later in life. So it makes sense that a lot of the guys here have experienced what you're talking about.

It should be mentioned that, while Descovy is better than Truvada in some regards (not all), Truvada is completely sufficient for the vast majority of people. Truvada is about to go generic in the US (it already is generic in other parts of the world), so if your doctor switches you to Descovy when you've had zero problems with Truvada, then your doctor is probably getting paid by Gilead (the drug company) and can't be trusted. (It's time to look for a new doc.) Back many moons ago I actually worked in pharmaceutical marketing and saw all this first hand. I coded and maintained a database that organized paid vacations for docs funded by pharma companies (actually they'd spend a few hours talking about how wonderful the drug was and then the rest of the day on the golf course or on the ski slopes). On top of that I had one doctor around that time where EVERY TIME I went to his office there was a pharmaceutical rep sitting in his waiting room wanting to talk to him. The kick backs the doctors get are real and can be rather obscene. A year's supply of Truvada costs a few hundred dollars to make. Yet, if they switch you to Descovy Gilead will charge around $15,000/year. It's not like they just discovered Descovy. They waited to release it now, just as Truvada is going generic, so they can keep their profits up. And we wonder why we can't seem to afford universal healthcare in this country… The difference in the costs of these two medications could provide basic healthcare for maybe a dozen or more kids. To me it's immoral to switch from Truvada to Descovy unless there is a medically valid reason for doing so (e.g. you're experiencing non-trivial problems and can't tolerate Truvada, or you have a family or personal history that requires you to reduce certain medical risks that are an issue with Truvada, but not Descovy).

BTW, if anyone is having side effects in the hours after taking PrEP simply take it before bed. Then you'll sleep through the side effects.

There's a lot of misinformation in this thread. So let me clear up a few things… [Everything I'm about to say is about Truvada, but may not be true about Descovy.] You can stop and start PrEP as much as you like. Poz guys cannot start and stop their meds as much as they like because their virus can become resistant when the drug levels are low. But neg guys don't have HIV, hence they have no virus that can become med-resistant. [Not that anyone implied otherwise.] When PrEP first came out they told people to take it for 7 days before having sex. But now "PrEP on Demand" is a thing and it's been validated (for gay men) by numerous studies. PrEP on Demand means you take 2 pills (at the same time) at least 2 hours before sex, then one pill every day until 48 hours after your last sexual encounter. That protocol works and is approved by a number of major countries (France being the most prominent). The initial IPERGAY study involved people who were having sex regularly to the point that they averaged ~4 pills/week, but later studies have shown that that protocol is also effective for guys who don't have much sex. The other thing to know is that Truvada has a very long half life. So if you're taking it daily and stop, you still have >90% protection a week later. But then the levels of protection drop off pretty quickly, so you'll hear stories about infections 10-14 days after stopping. The other thing that the studies have showed was that almost no one who took at least 4 pills in a week has become poz. That said, it also depends on the nature of your risk. Drug levels are quite high in the digestive system (e.g. in your colon), so if your risk is primarily anal, then lower doses are possible. However, people who have vaginas (and possibly tops) probably need to take PrEP every day. In other words bottoms take more than they need so women, trans guys, and tops get enough. The bottom line is start and stop as much as you like provided you remember to actually take the pills when you're supposed to. No harm will be done if you're taking it daily and forget a pill here or there. But if you're using PrEP on Demand you can't forget to take the pills – there's much less margin for error. I hope you can parse all of that into something that will work for you…

It's done. The data wasn't deleted. I've had really bad results from deleting data (I've managed to bring down the entire site). But the expiration date on the infractions was changed. I don't know what happens when something expires. I don't know whether it gets deleted or just doesn't count toward points next time you get an infraction. What I see when I read that is "I came into your house, made a mess, was asked to leave and not come back for a few days. That's just completely rude of you do to that." Ummm. No. It's rude to make a mess in someone else's house. Be happy they're OK with you coming back (after a cooling off period). Intent is irrelevant. They had to clean up after you. Please folks, no more discussion about the current infraction system. That's not what this thread is about.

So, after talking to DrScorpio I realized that the current infraction system wasn't working the way I thought it was working. Infractions will now always expire – anywhere from 90 days for minor stuff to 2 years for serious stuff (most often 1 year). The number of points and expiration period are now always moderator modifiable (which means be nice to the moderators!) Old infractions that weren't set to expire have had their expiration dates set. (180 days from date of infraction where it was 1 or 2 points, 1 year for 3-5 points, and 2 years if over 5 points). That's still pretty strict, but better than it was… My apologies for not realizing what was happening.

I've hidden a number of posts. This thread is about a future infraction system, not the current one. It's fine to mention the current system if you tie it back to ideas for building a better infraction system in the future. But it's not OK to just gripe about the current system. There are other threads for that.

The 737 Max debacle is a good example of corporations regulating themselves. But that's an example of deregulation – the government stopped regulating Boeing and trusted them to do what was right. But they didn't – they designed a plane that can't fly without computers and the software didn't work. All because they put profits over safety. So you were close with the role of big corporations, but you drew the exactly wrong conclusion. Businesses and the country actually do best when there's active and comprehensive regulation that's fair and balanced. That said, I'm a libertarian, and sometimes there isn't a good, factual basis for the regulation. Requiring condoms in porn is a good example.

When the content is moved to the new platform it will be split among multiple sites… Bareback Breeding will be on BBBH.men Oral will be on OralPigs.com Hardcore Fetish (fisting, piss, BDSM) will be on TwistedPigs.com Vanilla, Exhibitionism, etc (including "condom-free" sex that's not focused on breeding) will be on SpunkBuds.com Poz Fetish & HIV related health stuff will be on PozPigs.com Chem Sex will be on PuffPuff.cloud So when I said you'll need to first pick the main theme of the thread you're starting, that's what I meant – you'll have to pick the site that it will appear on. Actually you'll pick the "canonical" site – meaning the one that we tell Google is the official location of the thread. It's possible it could appear on one of the other sites as well. But based on the site you pick, it will then tell you the rules your post needs to follow. So basically if you're on BBBH.men you won't (or at least shouldn't) see any poz fetish. If you're on PozPigs you shouldn't see any chem sex. And so on. So no one needs to pick what they're interested in. At least for the categories that you mention – that will be controlled by them being on the site that is of most interest to them. My response above applies to this as well. But again, a brief version of the rules for that site will be near the submit button when you post a comment. Some things I might make only appear based on what you type. Yes, it's not easy enough with the current software to understand what you did wrong if you missed the initial email that explains it to you. That will be improved.

Let's discuss this in the moderator forum or on What's App. We can expire points now, and we do do it in some cases.

The current seniority system is based both on activity and time. You can make the max number of posts each day and still not get to the next step until a certain amount of time has passed.