NYBBGUY58

About 25 years ago, I was prescribed testosterone shots after I had multiple negative reactions to some of the early HIV meds, so it was only indirectly caused by HIV. Apparently it's clear if it's a definite causal relationship: [think before following links] https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7990869/ There are other articles that clearly state it's a known complication if you run a Google search. If you're one particular medications, check out what the known side effects are. In other words, I dunno. Sorry not to be of more assistance.

Do I rim? ENTHUSIASTICALLY!

I'm not at all surprised by your research. I've taken the meds for years, and they definitely have significant side effects. It's a matter of risk/benefit in choosing to take any medication or supplement, for that matter. I can understand your reluctance to continue.

The idea of size mattering has been drummed into us, but I concentrate on pleasing a person not calculating just how big the dick is. I've been topped by guys of all shapes and sizes, and I enjoy pleasuring others. To me, that's what a bottom should concentrate on. My most enjoyable sex partner currently isn't huge, isn't small - he's around 7.5 inches I guess. I don't bother to measure. He "gets" me though - not only understands what I like, but enjoys me enjoying him enjoying me...etc. So if you wanna top, let me know...just be prepared to have your ass licked and worshipped like it's never been before...

I have a major fetish for smelling guy's asses, especially, along with balls, dick and armpits. I might give you a run for your money...

For me it's pretty conventional: a shout as he cums, the way he might just have to lie down on me to catch his breath, words like "hot hole" or "nice, smooth hole," or speechlessness as he pants, and, finally, if/when he yawns a little as the endorphins hit!

I mostly feel the pulses as in "heart" plus the pulsing in the so-called tain't (aka "gooch") if I can reach to stroke the balls while he cums...

The last time that happened, I insisted that he use a non-latex condom (polystyrene, I think?) because I have a literal allergy to latex, not just a metaphorical one - I break out in contact dermatitis. The rash takes weeks to go away and it's miserable enough on an arm or leg, let alone my asshole. I didn't clean so well. I hope he regretted the whole thing. (Pun intended.) Now, I just move on and find tops who bareback. Everyone is happier that way.

I totally forgot one other one-off, a young white guy (5'7" with a really hot butt). He loved being dominated, and I fucked him face down and blew my load up his ass. He's significant because my profile picture is me getting ready to top him...🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

I'm 64 and have been a dedicated barebacker for around 10 years. I was more verse until 6 years ago when radiation treatment for prostate cancer left me with "performance issues." Since I started as a devoted bottom boy, it was a return to my roots! I've been HIV+ for close to 30 years, and only began barebacking when I had a hookup with a younger man (I would have been in my 50s at the time) who was about to penetrate and asked "Do you want the load?" I'd disclosed my HIV status and was a little surprised (this was pre-PreP) but answered "This is an option? Sure, go for it." It felt so much better without the rubber (turns out I had developed an allergic reaction to latex) that I never looked back and have pretty much looked for and found bareback partners for sex play since then. Before the prostate cancer, I was actually topping more often, since going through the clean-out to bottom is sort of a drag. I had a few different guys I'd fuck regularly. I love different body types: one was a blonde twink runner (HIV+, 5'7", 115 lbs, lean, shaved body with a really sweet, tight hole); another a 30/40-ish muscle guy (on PreP, 5'10", 160 lbs, shaved with a soft, smooth hole, felt AMAZING to penetrate); another was a French guy living in NY (HIV+, 5'7", 130 lbs) lightly hairy, average body with a hot butt), and another muscled guy (on PreP, 5'10", 165 lbs, hairy, HOT butt). In addition there were a couple of one-offs, a hairy, stocky muscled Latin guy (HIV+, 5'9", 170(?) lbs) and an Asian guy with a smooth, athletic body and butt (on PreP, 5'7", 140 lbs). They all took my poz loads up their butts completely willingly. FUCK! It felt so good to shoot bare inside a guy's hole after years of condom-only sex. Cumming is always good, but I'd say my best orgasms were with the the blonde twink runner and the shaved muscle guy and the one-off Asian guy. They were into my favorite foreplay, licking my ass - never fails to get me going. The others were good (dick sucking, kissing, etc.) but not as intense. I would say, though, that the French guy was a lot of fun (I slipped off the condom and stealthed him BB first time, didn't cum inside him). He really loved getting fucked, sucked dick and licked balls, loved having his ass opened up with my mouth and then taking my cock. We'd fuck missionary position, and he'd stroke my balls while I fucked him (once with both hands) so that I'd explode inside him. Then I'd stay inside him and he'd beat off with my dick in his hole until he shot. The runner boy would let me sit on his face and just go to town licking out my ass - I'd eat him, too. Or I'd stand and push my ass in his face (rimming obsession here, giving and receiving). His hole was tight, felt so good. The first time I came inside him was doggy-style; I thought we'd try a few different positions, but that sweet little runner's butt squeezed it out of me right away. The other times I remember best were once with him laying flat on his front, I held him in place with my hands under him right where his thighs met his pelvis (major explosion while his cum hole gripped my dick); and once he rode me reverse "cowgirl" and let his right hand trail up and down my balls to another surprise orgasm (so hot seeing his butt riding my cock and his fingers stroking my nut sack in time with his pole-riding). The shaved muscle guy was totally sub/power bottom. He had the best DS: (dick sucking lips), made it feel like a cum hole: soft mouth without a hint of teeth. I'd fuck his face with him on his knees or back, then put my crack over his mouth and order him to eat my ass. I also had him sit on my face and delved into those muscled cheeks with my tongue, delicious butt. He really liked missionary/scissors position (right leg over my left shoulder, left leg straight) because he always wanted to play with my balls (a favorite thing for both of us). He'd stroke them while he sucked my dick and once I'd penetrated that AMAZING hole, would gently finger my balls while I pumped in and out of him. I'd always cum so hard inside his neg muscle butt... The one time with the Asian boy was incredible. He was a power verse bottom and we got into a great 69 rimming each other's butts. He went into doggy style, and as soon as I'd penetrated his super-tight hole (surrounded by the prettiest ass cheeks) he was tickling my balls....5, 4, 3, 2, 1 BLAST OFF! Damn, I flooded his neg hole with my cum, such a turn-on! Hope you enjoyed...here are some pics of the butts mentioned.

I was diagnosed in 1993, but hadn't ever tested before then. I likely sero-converted in the late 80s when I annually would get a horrible case of what felt like flu, so it could have been any of those. I also started getting a lot of skin rashes in the late 80s; one doctor (though I didn't think she was a particularly good or skilled physician) proclaimed that must have been it. She was insisting that I begin immediate treatment with the early ineffective antivirals and was generally an idiot.

I always knew I was different than everyone else; the sociocultural environment of the 60s and 70s Midwest US didn't tolerate variation well at all - it was made clear beyond clear to me that whatever else was happening, I was not in tune with the majoritarian view. I wondered if I was gay. I tried talking to the child psychiatrist they sent me to because I was having emotional trouble (brought on by the rampant unkindness I lived with daily) and he wouldn't even discuss it with me. In a way, he took his job to be making sure those thoughts went nowhere. I first said to myself "Wow. I'm gay," at age 13. The setting: Disney World in Orlando, Florida on vacation with my parents. We were getting a quickie sailing lesson and found myself looking at the instructor, who was a good-looking dark-haired male, wondering what he thought of me, if maybe he would mistake me for a girl, and how much I wanted him to be interested in me. It was like being hit by lightening, stunning and disorienting. That was the start of my struggle with self-acceptance.

It's tough for me to take it for long periods mostly because I'm just built with a tight as, even now at age 64 after 40+ years of getting fucked. It gets seriously uncomfortable. My favorite is to do a LOT of foreplay, to the point where the guy has a hard time NOT cumming. And then doing it again!

My attitude is whatever works for the guy fucking me.

I think it's more perception than reality. I've known big, muscular bottoms (one was 6'2") and short tops (one was around 5 feet tall). I find all kinds of people have all kinds tastes that may or may not jive with their perceived appearance. I'm around 5'11" and have been mostly a devoted bottom throughout my sexual life. When I could top I started to enjoy it more...then got prostate cancer and returned more to my roots!

I think it's hard to tease out a specific "causation" of sexual desires and tastes; your own example is interesting (that your left-handed younger brother, the 5th child is straight while you're gay). It's very difficult to know if that's causation or correlation. Is there something else at play? I don't know how up a "double-blind" study of something like this could be created. What would serve as a control population? And many studies simply can't be replicated anyway even if a definitive one could be created. As far as tastes, those run the gamut as you yourself have experienced. Mine, too, for that matter. I have joked that what truly formed my sexual tastes were the vintage Popeye cartoons I saw as a child: the "unattainable" Olive Oyl, who would choose brawn over the nice guy at first, and then end up in over her head and resort to "No, don't, stop! Don't, stop! Don't! Stop! Don't! Stop! Don't! Stop! Don't! Stop!" Retrograde sexual politics and typical roles apparently did it for me, along with a raging crush on an uncle, some of my cousins and...almost any guy I spotted who appealed! The allure of the [banned word] can be very potent, it certainly is for me, whatever counts a [banned word] varying from person to person. At the same time, in my old age I've realized that some fantasies make rotten realities. I've tried acting out some of my more baroque beat-off material, and it's pretty much a disaster every time. I have accepted that I have particular tastes, and I try to find others who share them (see my story Pozzed...shameless plug for the tawdry details). Spontaneity is important to me, but I know there are many people who love structured role-plays, and that's great, too.

YEP! A few times...

I welcome you with open arms. There should be room for all here...

We must have the same virus...🤣 Enola Holmes 2 is a blast, and you get to look at Henry Cavill....🥵 The guy has a STELLAR ass in addition to being incredibly handsome!

PERFECT! Shall we play Poulenc, Copland, Ravel and Liebermann? They're all gay...😘😘😘

I just reread this comment, wow...thanks so much. What a compliment, "the perfect story to read on a cold snowy weekend while curled up in front of the fire"...sincere thanks. And I've now reconstructed the whole thing based on what's here and can begin again on chapter 27...

Music was my life line as a teen, too; growing up gay in the Midwest US during the 70s was brutal. I'm actually a flutist (no bad jokes), but I've always loved piano repertoire a lot, too. All that Mozart and Haydn and Beethoven...sigh. I guess I was infected during the earlier waves of HIV, though I wasn't diagnosed until 1993. My doctor at the time thought that I'd probably caught it much earlier, before anyone even knew it existed, which could have been the case. I refused to get tested until I absolutely had to because there wasn't any treatment, anyway.

I'm touched that my writing has meant so much to you.

I may have commented on this before, forgive me if I'm repeating myself. I'm 64, so condoms were the exception when I first started having sex. Contrary to popular belief, when HIV/AIDS emerged in the early 80s it wasn't as if everyone immediately started using condoms. There was a lot of confusion, fear, panic and conspiracy theories being bandied around. Sound familiar? I accepted condom use, even though I didn't really like how it felt as a bottom or top, but there were "lapses," because sex is a primal urge and it's not always possible to be "reasonable" in the face of circumstances. It must have been shortly before PreP became a "thing" that I was with a guy, in position to take his dick when he asked outright, "Do you want to take the load?" I'd told him I was positive with a low viral load; after a second to think I answered "This is an option? Sure!" I guess that must have been 2010-ish? Sorry I don't remember exactly, but I never looked back. Bare became the default, even on the occasions I'd top.

I essentially know where I was going after the last chapter - I was working and reworking chapter 27. In some ways this might help...I'd taken some turns that weren't really working. But yep, it's a right little pain in the ass and NOT in a good way!