Black guys - Am I missing something?

[BlackDude]

On 12/31/2018 at 2:40 PM, Tightslider said:

Its a fetish thing. Some people like amputees and midgets. Doesn't mean thats my thing though. The contrast has some kink to it. There are also percieved social roles which can add to ones kink / fetish. I've noticed that some of the fetish and people going crazy over this has already begun to die down. More porn sites are slowly going back to white dudes. Its just a preference.

So liking black men is a fetish? Ridiculous. 

[Harlemboy81]

On 12/29/2018 at 7:42 AM, wood said:

The easiest to response to the OP, and to to a majority of the responses on here is simple its just internalized and institutionalized racism, that sometimes manifests itself in positive ways and or stereotypes, and sometime negative ways.  One of my biggest problems with this site is just that.  There is always a a fetishization of black men, from all the BBC comments, to "thug" etc, and then there is the expectation from some mostly white people that all black men are somehow going to be sexual gods.  Sorry its just not true, and at the end of the day, we actually all have way more in common than we do that different.  We all look the same in the dark.  

I myself am a white man that for most of my life I have found myself more attracted to non-white people, be it black, asian, latino, etc. I cant pinpoint why, all I can say is that I have always like things different from the norm, from cars to art and architecture to men.  However, the same thing applies here, at the end of the day a car is a car, be it a rental camry or a very rare limited production model.  Men come in all shapes and sizes, and colors, but that doesn't make them very different.  This is where the internalized and institutionalized racism come into play.  Many gay white men tend to see black people as an object rather than another person, as a big dick fuck machine, rather than a person with feelings, and a life experience just like anyone else.  Institutionalized racism is so prevalent that most people don't even recognize it.  Its the little things like the surprise of seeing a picture of a world renowned surgeon and seeing its a black man, or the minute feeling in the back of your mind that if a black woman got a huge promotion over you, that it may be because of affirmative action and not simple qualifications.  The internalized part is because often they have no clue that what they are doing is actually based in centuries of oppression of black people throughout the world.  I think its laughable in the US when we think that we can undo centuries of a racism with one black president.

I myself am in a relationship with a black man, and while I surely see his color, his blackness is the last thing on my mind on a daily basis.  With that said anyone who isnt blind should never say "I dont see color"  by doing that we are ignoring the institutionalized and systemic racism that continues to affect the US and the world. For us however, just like anyone else in a long term relationship its about bills, dinner, sleeping, and hopefully sex, not race.  And FWIW at the end of the day, we are almost exactly the same height, weight, and dick size is almost identical with him being slightly thicker.  Hes also vers just like me because guess what just because he is black doesn't mean he is a strict top.  In fact when we met he was so glad I liked to fuck as well because he was tired of people not realizing he liked to bottom as well.       

 

This just reinforces what I said above, being a black man in American is a very nuanced thing, where you are expected to be so many different things, at the same time, yet fade into the background when society tells you too.  The black lives matter movement didn't come from the fact that ANYONE thought other lives were less important, it was to draw attention to a part of society that consistently gets marginalized for no fault of their own.  However saying things like BBC, or sexualizing black men marginalizes them as well.

Im sure this reply is way too long for most on this site, but its something that I could go on for days about.     

Thank you.  This is probably the best response I've seen on this topic.  Most of the others are... disappointing so say the least.  

[analluv27]

I just came across this while perusing through the topics while at work. In regards to the OP there's no definitive answer but from what I've seen is a many layered nuanced answers. 

For some yes it's a preference but developed from what? Actual experience from dating or actually fucking someone who's Black? For some yes or it's based off the stereotypical hung thick thug that wants to turn bitches out yes. 

Problems arise when we stop seeing people as people but as jerk off fantasies. And it's not just the hung black thug Mandingo, but there's effeminate or sexless Asian with men or the submissive Asian women. Most if not almost all gay White men want to be dominated by a person of color and so on.

True some folks do play into said stereotypes and some don't. My friend who happens to be black goes on how he likes to turn out "then poor little white boys". Or guys who approached me thinking that I'm hung (i'm not) will fuck them stupid (i'm more bottom) and that I'll gift them with HIV (can't because I'm undetectable) when I corrected them most were vocally disappointed others ran to the next fantasy guy. A few stuck around and got to know me

In summary there's no simple answer why but when pursuing even a fantasy try to remember that there's more to a person than a hard dick or tight/loose ass try to get the feel of a person again some do play into the stereotype but others don't. We all want to get pigged but we don't have to be a dick while obtaining it

 

[Tightslider]

On 9/12/2021 at 2:50 AM, BlackDude said:

So liking black men is a fetish? Ridiculous. 

I didnt say it was. It is a personal preference. Most people on sites such as this see this being pushed very hard. Go and check the straight sites and you see it flooded with this. Its not because of a need or desire. Actually every study done (Look them up yourself) show black men are the least desirable for asian, white, latin or even black women. Black women have them higher but white men rank higher for even black women. You see it everywhere because its called marketing. Selling the shit out of something to make cash to those who follow it. Nothing wrong with black men, I've had a few,  but people talking about them in a god-like status are so full of shit. Besides the past two were smaller than me.  Something else you dont see online. They cherry pick the biggest and only yht biggest. Look at personals. If they're not showing it, 9/10 they are smaller or average. This hurts black people having to live up to a fallacy and most cannot.

[BlackDude]

10 hours ago, Tightslider said:

I didnt say it was. It is a personal preference. Most people on sites such as this see this being pushed very hard. Go and check the straight sites and you see it flooded with this. Its not because of a need or desire. Actually every study done (Look them up yourself) show black men are the least desirable for asian, white, latin or even black women. Black women have them higher but white men rank higher for even black women. You see it everywhere because its called marketing. Selling the shit out of something to make cash to those who follow it. Nothing wrong with black men, I've had a few,  but people talking about them in a god-like status are so full of shit. Besides the past two were smaller than me.  Something else you dont see online. They cherry pick the biggest and only yht biggest. Look at personals. If they're not showing it, 9/10 they are smaller or average. This hurts black people having to live up to a fallacy and most cannot.

I’m not even going to respond to those bad faith arguments. 
 

Though I will say that’s the kind of stuff you hear from Latin men who identify as white. Just saying…

Edited September 20, 2021 by BlackDude

[Guest Xtraglazedonuthole]

This topic and some of the responding comments are ridiculously racist WOW. I'm definitely not just a"BBC" attached to a body for someone not to give a fuck about. Really sad this is the kinda stuff I encounter in a place we're I'd think I can feel free and speak amongst likeminded ppl. 

[Kimberley]

I don't really have a racial preference, i like white and black cocks from all origins. i bend down for every guy that want to fuck me no matter what color skin he have. a dick is a dick and a load is a load

[gwmxyz]

I like black guys. I just like the look.  Cock size doesn’t bother me and as for manner, my biggest turn-on is stereotypical bottom types who are actually tops. 
There’s this clever test by Harvard, the Implicit Association Test that people think helps you out on whether you’re racist or not. I’m not sure it does. I think it tells you who you’re into (and if fucking had any bearing on prejudices, Donald Trump couldn’t be sexist). 
When I told my wife my result of taking the IAT, her reaction was “obviously” - but not in a impressed or surprised sort of way. 
I just find white guys a bit ugly. It took me years to understand that some guys actually prefer blond/blue.
(As an aside I’ve noticed too with Chinese guys, that the ones who dye their hair blond seem to like to fuck guys with that hair colour too. Makes it nice and easy).

I’m not sure it makes much difference in the end though - coz anyone can fuck me.